Personal advice please

October 13, 2008

Hello, I typically don't ask for much advice from there, but I'm human.

I met someone late last year and she came down and we had sex.

When I saw her in person, I didn't feel the connection we had over the

phone, but I decided to try any way. She leaves two weeks later. She

comes back down three weeks later, not feeling well. I take her to the

ER, but don't ask what test she was getting. She didn't explain them

even if I was a mere 10 feet away.

I wanted to get tested for STD's days before, based on her past, and she

came along. Oh, the reason we didn't use protection was my Endo doctor

told me I was primary and it would be very difficult if not impossible

for me to conceive, and I trusted her. After that, I asked what is

wrong, she tells me they gave her a pregnancy test and it came up

positive. Of course, I was confused and a bit interested how she became

pregnant considering my condition.

We then go to the drug store and brought a cheap test. It turned out

negative, yet I didn't see her in the bathroom. I think I may have heard

her... in the toilet. Even through I didn't feel romantic or couldn't

wrap my mind around the notion of me and her, I did the honorable thing

and stayed by her side; only miles away.

OK in brief, turns out she is mentally unstable, not a good mom to her

other kids, liar, but tries to be a good person.I was planning in

relocating once the child was born. She kept thinking I was not, and

decided to punish me and herself by thinking negative.

She told me in June, seven months after, she went to the ER and had a

stillborn. She didn't tell me this right away. No, she waited and was

very rude over the phone when I asked for more information. She started

to say he didn't exist afterward. I felt, I had the right to know and

speak to doctors, nurses, and anyone else related to this pregnancy. Her

POV was (is), I shouldn't know anything other than what comes from her

mouth. I should believe her and not ask questions.

Today, she still lies about what happened concerning this pregnancy. I

try to explain, doctors told me this couldn't happened. I must know the

truth. Because if I did it, maybe just maybe, I could reproduce life

again. If this was a lie, I am back at the drawing board. I had

nightmares when she told me about the ER. I still suffer and get sadden

when I see babies and couples or just a single mom. I am in college now

and this situation hasn't been good.

I gave her a phone back when I met her; a dual line on my plan so she

can communicate with her kids and me. I have suspended this line a few

times because she refuse to stop this lying about what happened to this

pregnancy. I tell her, this is life and death and not some mere simple

lie.

I told her, I want no part of you because you refuse to tell me the

complete truth. I told her I am suspending her line for good. She tells

me, she cannot speak to her kids, and other stuff.. I told her, I cannot

be guilty any longer because you continue to not tell me the complete

truth.

For example, I asked her if he didn't exist, why did your friends buy

baby stuff? Why for months, did you speak and believe you were carrying

him? Why do you say he was a lie if you cannot answer questions to make

me sure he didn't exist? Or even provide a doctor name and number the

times you said he did exist?

I have called her OB/GYN, but they couldn't give me info. No one will. I

have threatened her with legal action, but still she cannot tell me the

complete truth. Understand ppl, I have to know if I did conceive.

She gave me an image of him in the ER, but I haven't looked at it. I

cannot. I grieved months and still today.I never abused her and I helped

her for almost a year with her life.

I was her therapist and her words lover as well. I cannot believe

someone will do me like this. Yes she is mentally sick with a serious

diagnosis and she has been abused in her past and a domestic abuse

" support " group has brainwashed her to believe, if you suspect therefore

he is wrong and hiding something.Therefore you must punish him because

he is controlling you.

But still, she knows right from wrong and you don't lie about being

pregnant whether you were or not. He could have been my only chance at

fatherhood. I needed him and that challenge. He would have been

wonderful and my savior in a way.

Do you ppl feel I should let this go and not try to find out if I did

conceive? Anything you wish to add as well.

October 13, 2008

If your Dr. told you you can't make a baby because your on TRT or Primary he is

wrong. This happens to men see it posted all the time with guys on TRT that

don't want anymore kids and end up having more.

There is no way you can find out if she was telling your a lie or not unless she

was trying to get you to pay out money. You can try seeing a lawyer but I would

just let her go and forget about this next time make sure you use something

there is HIV out there so your lucky you did not get aids.

Co-Moderator

Phil

> From: uu1845 <uu1845@...>

> Subject: Personal advice please

>

> Date: Monday, October 13, 2008, 2:56 AM

> Hello, I typically don't ask for much advice from there,

> but I'm human.

> I met someone late last year and she came down and we had

> sex.

>

> When I saw her in person, I didn't feel the connection

> we had over the

> phone, but I decided to try any way. She leaves two weeks

> later. She

> comes back down three weeks later, not feeling well. I take

> her to the

> ER, but don't ask what test she was getting. She

> didn't explain them

> even if I was a mere 10 feet away.

>

> I wanted to get tested for STD's days before, based on

> her past, and she

> came along. Oh, the reason we didn't use protection was

> my Endo doctor

> told me I was primary and it would be very difficult if not

> impossible

> for me to conceive, and I trusted her. After that, I asked

> what is

> wrong, she tells me they gave her a pregnancy test and it

> came up

> positive. Of course, I was confused and a bit interested

> how she became

> pregnant considering my condition.

>

> We then go to the drug store and brought a cheap test. It

> turned out

> negative, yet I didn't see her in the bathroom. I think

> I may have heard

> her... in the toilet. Even through I didn't feel

> romantic or couldn't

> wrap my mind around the notion of me and her, I did the

> honorable thing

> and stayed by her side; only miles away.

>

> OK in brief, turns out she is mentally unstable, not a good

> mom to her

> other kids, liar, but tries to be a good person.I was

> planning in

> relocating once the child was born. She kept thinking I was

> not, and

> decided to punish me and herself by thinking negative.

>

> She told me in June, seven months after, she went to the ER

> and had a

> stillborn. She didn't tell me this right away. No, she

> waited and was

> very rude over the phone when I asked for more information.

> She started

> to say he didn't exist afterward. I felt, I had the

> right to know and

> speak to doctors, nurses, and anyone else related to this

> pregnancy. Her

> POV was (is), I shouldn't know anything other than what

> comes from her

> mouth. I should believe her and not ask questions.

>

> Today, she still lies about what happened concerning this

> pregnancy. I

> try to explain, doctors told me this couldn't happened.

> I must know the

> truth. Because if I did it, maybe just maybe, I could

> reproduce life

> again. If this was a lie, I am back at the drawing board. I

> had

> nightmares when she told me about the ER. I still suffer

> and get sadden

> when I see babies and couples or just a single mom. I am in

> college now

> and this situation hasn't been good.

>

> I gave her a phone back when I met her; a dual line on my

> plan so she

> can communicate with her kids and me. I have suspended this

> line a few

> times because she refuse to stop this lying about what

> happened to this

> pregnancy. I tell her, this is life and death and not some

> mere simple

> lie.

>

> I told her, I want no part of you because you refuse to

> tell me the

> complete truth. I told her I am suspending her line for

> good. She tells

> me, she cannot speak to her kids, and other stuff.. I told

> her, I cannot

> be guilty any longer because you continue to not tell me

> the complete

> truth.

>

> For example, I asked her if he didn't exist, why did

> your friends buy

> baby stuff? Why for months, did you speak and believe you

> were carrying

> him? Why do you say he was a lie if you cannot answer

> questions to make

> me sure he didn't exist? Or even provide a doctor name

> and number the

> times you said he did exist?

>

> I have called her OB/GYN, but they couldn't give me

> info. No one will. I

> have threatened her with legal action, but still she cannot

> tell me the

> complete truth. Understand ppl, I have to know if I did

> conceive.

>

> She gave me an image of him in the ER, but I haven't

> looked at it. I

> cannot. I grieved months and still today.I never abused her

> and I helped

> her for almost a year with her life.

>

> I was her therapist and her words lover as well. I cannot

> believe

> someone will do me like this. Yes she is mentally sick with

> a serious

> diagnosis and she has been abused in her past and a

> domestic abuse

> " support " group has brainwashed her to believe,

> if you suspect therefore

> he is wrong and hiding something.Therefore you must punish

> him because

> he is controlling you.

>

> But still, she knows right from wrong and you don't lie

> about being

> pregnant whether you were or not. He could have been my

> only chance at

> fatherhood. I needed him and that challenge. He would have

> been

> wonderful and my savior in a way.

>

> Do you ppl feel I should let this go and not try to find

> out if I did

> conceive? Anything you wish to add as well.

>

October 13, 2008

Sorry about all of that relationship stuff. I'm not a good

one to ask about that because I've had a few myself and

I am often reminded of the immortal words of Warren

Zevon from " Poor Poor Pitiful Me "

(Warren Zevon)

I`d lay my head on the railroad tracks

And wait for the Double `E`

But the railroad don`t run no more

Poor, poor pitiful me

These young girls won`t let me be

Lord have mercy on me

Woe is me

Well, I met a girl in West Hollywood

I ain`t naming names

She really worked me over good

She was just like

She really worked me over good

She was a credit to her gender

She put me through some changes, Lord

Sort of like a Waring blender

Poor, poor pitiful me

These young girls won`t let me be

Lord have mercy on me

Woe is me

Well, I met a girl at the Rainbow bar

She asked me if I`d beat her

She took me back to the Hyatt House

I don`t want to talk about it

Poor, poor pitiful me

These young girls won`t let me be

Lord have mercy on me

Woe is me

(Well, I met a girl from the Vieux Carre`

Down in Yokahama

She picked me up and she throwed me down

I said, `Please don`t hurt me, Mama`)

Man, I've been there a time or two...

Anyway, about fertility. As far as I know, being a primary

means that you don't respond to LH. It takes FSH and

testosterone to make sperm & babies. I've got a good

book on the subject, but I don't have it with me so I

am not stating this authoritatively. I do remember this

bit though, the first line treatment for infertility in men

is hCG. If after 6 months pregnancy hasn't been achieved,

FSH is added to the regimen. If you are a primary, you

won't respond to hCG, but having adequate testosterone

in your veins and a little bit of FSH could do the trick.

When I get a chance, I'll look it up and verify the

statement above about a primary being desensitized to

LH, but possibly not to FSH.

The thing is, if you want to be a father, find a girl that

you get along with and would make a good mom, then

see a fertility specialist. About the relationship you

were in, unless you have a restraining order against

you, what's to prevent you from going there and seeing

for yourself? If she does have an infant in the house,

all of her talk about pregnancy is enough to demand

a paternity test. It sounds like she is enough of a mess

that you probably have a good chance at getting the

kid if it is yours.

Good luck with all of this...

-Mike

>

> Hello, I typically don't ask for much advice from there, but I'm human.

> I met someone late last year and she came down and we had sex.

>

> When I saw her in person, I didn't feel the connection we had over the

> phone, but I decided to try any way. She leaves two weeks later. She

> comes back down three weeks later, not feeling well. I take her to the

> ER, but don't ask what test she was getting. She didn't explain them

> even if I was a mere 10 feet away.

>

> I wanted to get tested for STD's days before, based on her past, and she

> came along. Oh, the reason we didn't use protection was my Endo doctor

> told me I was primary and it would be very difficult if not impossible

> for me to conceive, and I trusted her. After that, I asked what is

> wrong, she tells me they gave her a pregnancy test and it came up

> positive. Of course, I was confused and a bit interested how she became

> pregnant considering my condition.

>

> We then go to the drug store and brought a cheap test. It turned out

> negative, yet I didn't see her in the bathroom. I think I may have heard

> her... in the toilet. Even through I didn't feel romantic or couldn't

> wrap my mind around the notion of me and her, I did the honorable thing

> and stayed by her side; only miles away.

>

> OK in brief, turns out she is mentally unstable, not a good mom to her

> other kids, liar, but tries to be a good person.I was planning in

> relocating once the child was born. She kept thinking I was not, and

> decided to punish me and herself by thinking negative.

>

> She told me in June, seven months after, she went to the ER and had a

> stillborn. She didn't tell me this right away. No, she waited and was

> very rude over the phone when I asked for more information. She started

> to say he didn't exist afterward. I felt, I had the right to know and

> speak to doctors, nurses, and anyone else related to this pregnancy. Her

> POV was (is), I shouldn't know anything other than what comes from her

> mouth. I should believe her and not ask questions.

>

> Today, she still lies about what happened concerning this pregnancy. I

> try to explain, doctors told me this couldn't happened. I must know the

> truth. Because if I did it, maybe just maybe, I could reproduce life

> again. If this was a lie, I am back at the drawing board. I had

> nightmares when she told me about the ER. I still suffer and get sadden

> when I see babies and couples or just a single mom. I am in college now

> and this situation hasn't been good.

>

> I gave her a phone back when I met her; a dual line on my plan so she

> can communicate with her kids and me. I have suspended this line a few

> times because she refuse to stop this lying about what happened to this

> pregnancy. I tell her, this is life and death and not some mere simple

> lie.

>

> I told her, I want no part of you because you refuse to tell me the

> complete truth. I told her I am suspending her line for good. She tells

> me, she cannot speak to her kids, and other stuff.. I told her, I cannot

> be guilty any longer because you continue to not tell me the complete

> truth.

>

> For example, I asked her if he didn't exist, why did your friends buy

> baby stuff? Why for months, did you speak and believe you were carrying

> him? Why do you say he was a lie if you cannot answer questions to make

> me sure he didn't exist? Or even provide a doctor name and number the

> times you said he did exist?

>

> I have called her OB/GYN, but they couldn't give me info. No one will. I

> have threatened her with legal action, but still she cannot tell me the

> complete truth. Understand ppl, I have to know if I did conceive.

>

> She gave me an image of him in the ER, but I haven't looked at it. I

> cannot. I grieved months and still today.I never abused her and I helped

> her for almost a year with her life.

>

> I was her therapist and her words lover as well. I cannot believe

> someone will do me like this. Yes she is mentally sick with a serious

> diagnosis and she has been abused in her past and a domestic abuse

> " support " group has brainwashed her to believe, if you suspect therefore

> he is wrong and hiding something.Therefore you must punish him because

> he is controlling you.

>

> But still, she knows right from wrong and you don't lie about being

> pregnant whether you were or not. He could have been my only chance at

> fatherhood. I needed him and that challenge. He would have been

> wonderful and my savior in a way.

>

> Do you ppl feel I should let this go and not try to find out if I did

> conceive? Anything you wish to add as well.

>

October 13, 2008

" Anyway, about fertility. As far as I know, being a primary

means that you don't respond to LH. It takes FSH and

testosterone to make sperm & babies. I've got a good

book on the subject, but I don't have it with me so I

am not stating this authoritatively. If you are a primary, you

won't respond to hCG, but having adequate testosterone

in your veins and a little bit of FSH could do the trick. "

Thank you for the advice and words. Meant allot. No, at seven months she said

she went to the ER and had a stillbirth. It was a high risk pregnancy but one of

the reasons for me to speak to a doc was to see when I should come up. I live on

a budget and she lives in an SRO, so I couldn't stay over and I couldn't afford

a motel.

But if the docs told me it was so unfortunate, I would have made my way up

there. Instead, I paid other stuff I could for her and was there as a therapist

and friend, but it wasn't good enough.

I have no son and no friend. I want to believe I conceive, but I don't know..

Atleast I can give hope for myself and other men if I did conceive.

Last time I checked my Estradiol was in '07.

I was 29 then.

It was 147.24 (ND - 52).

____________________________________________________________

Estradiol 51 <52 pg/ml '06. (around the

time I started TRT)

SHBG 15 7-0 nmol/l '06

Total T 487 '06

___________________________________________________________

Since '05, my free Test. has been between 1.8 - 2.0 range.

My total T has improved but it drops when I do not use the Androgel regularly.

I cannot find any test for FSH but I remember when I started I should have

checked.

I took basic T checks and I will see the results on Tuesday or Wednesday.

I may make an appointment for my Endo doctor to check Estradiol, FSH, LH, etc.

Thanks as well Mr. Phil.

October 13, 2008

You are most welcome. Boy, you will feel a lot

better if you can get that E2 down to 20-30 ng/ml.

Did I read that right, your E2 was 147? That's about

what mine was at when I started out on the road

to recovery. That will make you depressed and

emotional. Please try some DIM or see if you can

get your doc to give you some kind of aromatase

inhibiting agent. It makes such a huge difference

in how you feel.

Also, if you are on any of these drugs

http://tinyurl.com/drugs-that-elevate-estrogen

see if you can find an alternative. Stomach pills

like prilosec and even more so tagamet will elevate

your estradiol. Lunesta is really bad about that too.

Over the counter stuff that can help with this

are DIM, zinc (ZMA), Chrysin, Quercitin and

Nettle Root.

I am very sorry about all the crap you went through.

Well, it sounds like she's not the kind of friend you

would want but this should give you some hope

about being a father some day, with a girl that is

a real friend to you.

Hang in there man, it does get better when you

get your levels where they should be and there

is a girl out there that is perfect for you. Just take

care of yourself and be patient.

-Mike

>

> " Anyway, about fertility. As far as I know, being a primary

> means that you don't respond to LH. It takes FSH and

> testosterone to make sperm & babies. I've got a good

> book on the subject, but I don't have it with me so I

> am not stating this authoritatively. If you are a primary, you

> won't respond to hCG, but having adequate testosterone

> in your veins and a little bit of FSH could do the trick. "

>

> Thank you for the advice and words. Meant allot. No, at seven months she said

she went

to the ER and had a stillbirth. It was a high risk pregnancy but one of the

reasons for me to

speak to a doc was to see when I should come up. I live on a budget and she

lives in an

SRO, so I couldn't stay over and I couldn't afford a motel.

>

> But if the docs told me it was so unfortunate, I would have made my way up

there.

Instead, I paid other stuff I could for her and was there as a therapist and

friend, but it

wasn't good enough.

>

> I have no son and no friend. I want to believe I conceive, but I don't know..

>

> Atleast I can give hope for myself and other men if I did conceive.

>

> Last time I checked my Estradiol was in '07.

>

> I was 29 then.

>

> It was 147.24 (ND - 52).

> ____________________________________________________________

>

> Estradiol 51 <52 pg/ml '06. (around the

time I started TRT)

>

> SHBG 15 7-0 nmol/l '06

>

> Total T 487 '06

> ___________________________________________________________

>

> Since '05, my free Test. has been between 1.8 - 2.0 range.

>

> My total T has improved but it drops when I do not use the Androgel regularly.

>

> I cannot find any test for FSH but I remember when I started I should have

checked.

>

> I took basic T checks and I will see the results on Tuesday or Wednesday.

>

> I may make an appointment for my Endo doctor to check Estradiol, FSH, LH, etc.

>

> Thanks as well Mr. Phil.

>

October 14, 2008

Don't make that appointment you can't check LH and FSH on TRT your brain sees

the testosterone in your blood and stops or slows down sending the LH and FSH

message to your testis to make T this is why on TRT in time if you don't add HCG

your testis will get small mine were the size of small grapes.

Endo's are not good Dr.'s for low testosterone and most of them will not test

Estradiol or treat it. Your very high on your Estradiol " E2 " you would feel

much better getting this down. Do you have night time and morning wood if not

this is why getting E2 down will make your T meds work much better high E2 binds

up T so you don't get to use it. Just getting E2 down your Free T will shoot

up.

With your labs if you can't get one of your Dr.'s to give you Arimidex then get

some Indolplex/DIM from this link I know this brand works. Take one tablet at

dinner time in about 2 weeks you will find your feeling much better less brain

fog sleeping better and your wood will work much better.

http://www.ritecare.com/prodsheets/PHY-15336.html

When you get some strong wood the kind that wakes you up you know you hit the

sweet spot and your E2 levels are good. Keep taking the DIM but if your wood

stops your going down to low stop the DIM. When your wood comes back that day

go back on the DIM but cut it in half.

If you try this keep me posted how your doing so your don't go down to low. To

low is just as bad as to high.

Also it would be good to get some ZMA it has Zinc in it take 3 pills at bedtime

and at noon take 2 mg. pill of Copper we are all low on Zinc and Copper and

doing some Zinc will also help keep E2 down but can lower your Copper levels.

http://www.myvitanet.com/zmaanspre90c.html

http://www.myvitanet.com/cop100cnt2mg.html

Co-Moderator

Phil

> From: U U <uu1845@...>

> Subject: Re: Re: Personal advice please

>

> Date: Monday, October 13, 2008, 7:25 PM

> " Anyway, about fertility. As far as I know, being a

> primary

> means that you don't respond to LH. It takes FSH and

> testosterone to make sperm & babies. I've got a

> good

> book on the subject, but I don't have it with me so I

> am not stating this authoritatively. If you are a primary,

> you

> won't respond to hCG, but having adequate testosterone

> in your veins and a little bit of FSH could do the

> trick. "

>

> Thank you for the advice and words. Meant allot. No, at

> seven months she said she went to the ER and had a

> stillbirth. It was a high risk pregnancy but one of the

> reasons for me to speak to a doc was to see when I should

> come up. I live on a budget and she lives in an SRO, so I

> couldn't stay over and I couldn't afford a motel.

>

> But if the docs told me it was so unfortunate, I would have

> made my way up there. Instead, I paid other stuff I could

> for her and was there as a therapist and friend, but it

> wasn't good enough.

>

> I have no son and no friend. I want to believe I conceive,

> but I don't know..

>

> Atleast I can give hope for myself and other men if I did

> conceive.

>

> Last time I checked my Estradiol was in '07.

>

> I was 29 then.

>

> It was 147.24 (ND -

> 52).

> ____________________________________________________________

>

> Estradiol 51

> <52 pg/ml '06. (around

> the time I started TRT)

>

> SHBG

> 15 7-0

> nmol/l '06

>

> Total T 487

>

> '06

> ___________________________________________________________

>

> Since '05, my free Test. has been between 1.8 - 2.0

> range.

>

> My total T has improved but it drops when I do not use the

> Androgel regularly.

>

> I cannot find any test for FSH but I remember when I

> started I should have checked.

>

> I took basic T checks and I will see the results on Tuesday

> or Wednesday.

>

> I may make an appointment for my Endo doctor to check

> Estradiol, FSH, LH, etc.

>

> Thanks as well Mr. Phil.

>

October 14, 2008

Thanks for the advice. I am going to order that specific DIM this evening.

If you cannot test for LH and FSH, how would I know if I can conceive?

How can I know if neither the Androgel is producing sperm or killing them off?

Should I just do this sperm count?

I didn't do it before, because my Endo said I would have to be off of TRT for a

good 3 weeks before I could take it.

I cannot be off of it for that long, although now I feel the lowest I felt

since I began. Its effecting my studies at college and making me more fatigued.

I do not have morning wood, but I did.

As I gained weight due to this child situation, I think my " E2 " has also risen.

What would your advice be for the sperm count?

Also, my testis are smaller, they never fully matured, but on TRT they are like

nothing.

Its scary because Im thinking they are nothing down there, therefore there is no

sperm and one day soon i would like to be a dad.

I have read primary men cannot benefit from HCG or anything else to improve in

that area.

October 14, 2008

If your Dr. did not run labs and test to find out why your low it's hard to

tell. I was told I am primary for 23 yrs. 2 yrs. ago I found out I am not

primary but secodary. All I did was to add HCG to my T shots and doing 500 IU's

of HCG 3 x's a weeks after the 15th. shot my levels doubled so after doing an

MRI and it was clean we found out my pituitary is bad do to a head injury. Once

you go on TRT even stopping it for months at a time there is no garinte they

will find out why your low. Your best bet is to find a good male hormone Dr.

like Dr. at www.allthingsmale.com he will work with your Dr. over the phone

to find out and test and treat you. He is one of the best out there.

Co-Moderator

Phil

> From: U U <uu1845@...>

> Subject: Re: Re: Personal advice please

>

> Date: Tuesday, October 14, 2008, 12:59 PM

> Thanks for the advice. I am going to order that specific DIM

> this evening.

>

> If you cannot test for LH and FSH, how would I know if I

> can conceive?

>

> How can I know if neither the Androgel is producing sperm

> or killing them off?

>

> Should I just do this sperm count?

>

> I didn't do it before, because my Endo said I would

> have to be off of TRT for a good 3 weeks before I could take

> it.

>

> I cannot be off of it for that long, although now I feel

> the lowest I felt since I began. Its effecting my studies at

> college and making me more fatigued.

>

> I do not have morning wood, but I did.

>

> As I gained weight due to this child situation, I think my

> " E2 " has also risen.

>

> What would your advice be for the sperm count?

>

> Also, my testis are smaller, they never fully matured, but

> on TRT they are like nothing.

>

> Its scary because Im thinking they are nothing down there,

> therefore there is no sperm and one day soon i would like to

> be a dad.

>

> I have read primary men cannot benefit from HCG or anything

> else to improve in that area.

>

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