PA at 25..... Worth living ?

[Guest guest]

Hi folks..... Here is a very sorry part of life which i hope nobody

should go thro;; its really evry painfull.. not only the PA pain but

also the one that comes form social inacceptance.

I m 25 yeard old guy from india and got engaged some days back

(arranged marriage) and after a month or so i told my fiancie that i

m suffering from Psoariasis and some pain too .. now since in India

nobody has heard much abt Psoariasis so they enquired wth all the

doctors (dermatologists) who just said " Psoariasis is not permanently

curable and

will be there for life time.... " Now after this they have called it

off and have decided not to go ahead with marriage.. I love that gal

too much and cant think of my life without her..I dunno how will i

survive without her..everything has changed after i informed her abt

Psoariasis...medicines r working on me but i dont feel the urge to

live now..

Also i dont blame her for it.. infact coz' i love her so much i told

her that i m suffering from " P " so that she doesnt feel cheated abt

it after marriage .Ours is an arranged marriage. but since engagement

i have loved her like anything and saw my best life partner in

her...I started my medicines after i got engaged coz' than i realised

that i wanted to

live my life for her..i mean i had got an aim in my life...but i dont

blame her or her parents. Nobody would like their daughter being

married to such a person who gets PA pain every 2/3 years..after all

everybody has a right to think abt thier well being.... But NO..

my " P "

is not at all aggravated..it is much controlled then it was 5 years

back..it is just on 2% of my body but some PA pain does exists which

seems to be going by the magic of methotrexate(2 more weeks to go).

by my past experiences it will be wipped out in 6 weeks after starting

methotrexate.. I have told them this thing that it is under control.

but they r a lot scared and as it is accepting such a person is not

common atleast in India ...

I dont blame her..she is too good to get a much better life partner

than me i believe atleast physically..... I blame my " P " for all this

and ofcourse me.. Had i not told her abt it before marriage, she

would have to accept it after marriage. but me being the person i m,

i was feeling guilty that i was hiding this thing from her....thats

it... i m frustrated,devasted a lot as i dont feel like coming out

of " Psoariasis " thinking that whom should i live for, when the person

i loved so much has opted not to go ahead with me....I repeat i dont

blame her..My psoariasis has now started aggravating after i heard of

my breakoff ..same medicines which used to work in past arent working

this time..I know i have a nice family ,parents, brothers, sister in

laws,neice,nephew... but i tend to see her face in everything around

me.. i m still not able to absorb the shock that P has ruined my

life..I could never imagine that " Psoarisais " will ruin my life till

this extent... so much that it will rob me of my love , (and maybe my

JOB - Software Engineer - in another couple of weeks ,if i dont get

well ).. and then ultimately my life which anyways i m not interested

in if it has such great shocks in store for me....Is this the price

one has to pay for being honest and having Psoariasis ?

What is the Medical Fraternity of the world doing when so many lives

r getting affected with it around the world....doctors say " the real

cause is not yet known " ....I cant digest that ...with so many

sufferers around the world is it difficult to find the root cause ?

And finally to this PA group.., does anybody at this age got PA and

married ? if yes (than if u wont mind) let me know whether handling

physical relations is a problem area especially if one has pain in

Sacro Iliac joint (hip region).....

jay