Re: polite ways to refuse a handshake

[Guest guest]

If its easier you could make up something they can understand and not

question like " The wind caught the car door and mashed my hand, can we shake

with the other or kiss or some other greeting? " ha ha Orin

[Guest guest]

I posted on this not long ago -

I think someone told me that they always said, I'm sorry I can't shake your

hand, I have arthritis - but I understand what you mean about the reaction to

that (you can't have it, you're too young, take some tylenol, my grandmother

has that - yada yada)

I liked one response that said they offer their hand to be kissed rather than

shook, but I guess that's a bit awkward if you're male

For me, it depends on the day and on how they grab it - I usually just grin

and bear it. It's difficult in a business situation - maybe we could try

refusing to put our pens down and just sort of tapping them on their arm or

an arm around their shoulders - I don't know, that might be too awkward too

....

[Guest guest]

I'll share my favorite way to avoid too much hand shake pain... I meet drug

company reps all day long, each interested in making me like their drug

best.... So most approach with an outstretched hand, big smile and heavy eye

contact.

I have worked for a while to find my best response = I return the gaze, and

the smile, but I stand too far away for them to reach my hand and offer a

quick explanation about my hands being painful that day, no real reason why.

Most reps are too polite to ask. For those brave enough to ask, I brush it

off and change the subject saying " oh, you want to tell me stories today,

remember... now about this new drug you have.... " I make sure they have my

business card and so they know I am interested I try to make a small gesture,

touch an arm, a shoulder or something of theirs, just for a second. And I

make a point of thanking them for their consideration at the end of the

meeting. It doesn't always work, but I've been lucky for the most part these

days.

[Guest guest]

I have encountered this situation also, and there is no easy answer. If you try

to explain it, it just takes too long. I just try to have something in my hands.

Another thing when the P is flaring bad is that the palms of my hands look as if

they rotting off. Very awkward to go to the store and hold my hand out for

change. I just tell them to please lay the change on the counter. I hate it when

the P is flaring and I get questions...

Teri

djrenna02148 <david@...> wrote: It's even one of the examples

in the posting guidelines, but yet I

don't see any postings. Surely some folks must encounter this

problem. I am recently diagnosed with PA, after 18 months of

pain/trying several NSAIDS/undiagnosis. Psoriasis only flared up in

the past 6weeks, but enabled my Rheumatologist to feel comfortable to

move me up to Methotrexate. I am justing starting that, but daily I

encounter " the handshake " . What do other folks do? In social

situations it's usually easier to avoid (hands in pockets, or filled

with glasses & food), but what about in business?

I run a business and meet cliets throughout the day. On the

occasions that I have tried to politely decline, I end up spending

time telling strangers my affliction, and " yes, it can occur in

people that are as young as me " , and other info that i don't really

care to say for the xxxteenth time. Tell me what you do, please.

-------------

Wear a wrist brace? It wouldn't interfere with your work and they would " se " the

brace solving the handshake deliemma. PatB

[Guest guest]

Teri, boy that " not wanting to hold your hand out for change " line really

took me back to my childhood, I feel your pain! Maybe we could bring back

the ladylike art of wearing little cotton gloves LOL.

[Guest guest]

you could ask your dr. for a hand splint /brace type

thing for your handshaking hand and they wont shake

your hand if it has a brace on it. just a suggestion

or or bow in politeness they dont know your culture so

if u start bowing it may catch on? just a suggestion

sarah

--- djrenna02148 <david@...> wrote:

> It's even one of the examples in the posting

> guidelines, but yet I

> don't see any postings. Surely some folks must

> encounter this

> problem. I am recently diagnosed with PA, after 18

> months of

> pain/trying several NSAIDS/undiagnosis. Psoriasis

> only flared up in

> the past 6weeks, but enabled my Rheumatologist to

> feel comfortable to

> move me up to Methotrexate. I am justing starting

> that, but daily I

> encounter " the handshake " . What do other folks do?

> In social

> situations it's usually easier to avoid (hands in

> pockets, or filled

> with glasses & food), but what about in business?

> I run a business and meet cliets throughout the day.

> On the

> occasions that I have tried to politely decline, I

> end up spending

> time telling strangers my affliction, and " yes, it

> can occur in

> people that are as young as me " , and other info that

> i don't really

> care to say for the xxxteenth time. Tell me what you

> do, please.

>

>

>

=====

mom to zach 21 months ga2

alexis 3 fine

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Hello ,

You can do a search on the archives to find previous postings on

this. It has come up before but not in the last couple of weeks. The

archives are searchable through a field in the upper right.

I suggested using your left hand instead of the right. Others have

good suggestions such as bowing slightly and smiling. In a

professional environment, I would avoid trying to explain the medical

reasons.

Hope you find a good working solution for you!

-Meghan

> It's even one of the examples in the posting guidelines, but yet I

> don't see any postings. Surely some folks must encounter this

> problem. I am recently diagnosed with PA, after 18 months of

> pain/trying several NSAIDS/undiagnosis. Psoriasis only flared up in

> the past 6weeks, but enabled my Rheumatologist to feel comfortable

to

> move me up to Methotrexate. I am justing starting that, but daily

I

> encounter " the handshake " . What do other folks do? In social

> situations it's usually easier to avoid (hands in pockets, or

filled

> with glasses & food), but what about in business?

> I run a business and meet cliets throughout the day. On the

> occasions that I have tried to politely decline, I end up spending

> time telling strangers my affliction, and " yes, it can occur in

> people that are as young as me " , and other info that i don't really

> care to say for the xxxteenth time. Tell me what you do, please.

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/26/02 4:45:58 PM Eastern Standard Time, orinok@...

writes:

> The wind caught the car door and mashed my hand, can we shake

> with the other or kiss or some other greeting? " ha ha Orin

Here ! Here! Orin has a great idea... lol....

[Guest guest]

I thought about getting white satin ones trimmed in maribou!!! Might as well

have fun with this P!!!! My hands would get so bad that they would bleed. I

would wrap cotton gauze onto them so I wouldn't get blood on my paperwork at

work.. The MTX has worked wonders , but I have been on it for about a year now

and I'm scared of the associated liver damage.. I am so tired all the time. It

is really starting to interfere with work. I'm just hoping that my supervisor

understand what I'm going thorugh and cuts me a little slack.. I have three kids

to support on my own and can't afford not to work. I am a teacher at a youth

detention center, and the stress is really high, but I would have to take about

a $10,000 a year pay cut to go to public school.

Teri

[

[Guest guest]

Doesn't work. I am wearing a hand brace and people still try to shake my hand,

BUT they are very gentle about it. so I suppose if you don't mind wearing a

brace it can save you the pain of shaking hands.

>>> sassynlexnzac@... 04/26/02 07:16PM >>>

you could ask your dr. for a hand splint /brace type

thing for your handshaking hand and they wont shake

your hand if it has a brace on it. just a suggestion

or or bow in politeness they dont know your culture so

if u start bowing it may catch on? just a suggestion

sarah

--- djrenna02148 <david@...> wrote:

> It's even one of the examples in the posting

> guidelines, but yet I

> don't see any postings. Surely some folks must

> encounter this

> problem. I am recently diagnosed with PA, after 18

> months of

> pain/trying several NSAIDS/undiagnosis. Psoriasis

> only flared up in

> the past 6weeks, but enabled my Rheumatologist to

> feel comfortable to

> move me up to Methotrexate. I am justing starting

> that, but daily I

> encounter " the handshake " . What do other folks do?

> In social

> situations it's usually easier to avoid (hands in

> pockets, or filled

> with glasses & food), but what about in business?

> I run a business and meet cliets throughout the day.

> On the

> occasions that I have tried to politely decline, I

> end up spending

> time telling strangers my affliction, and " yes, it

> can occur in

> people that are as young as me " , and other info that

> i don't really

> care to say for the xxxteenth time. Tell me what you

> do, please.

>

>

>

=====

mom to zach 21 months ga2

alexis 3 fine

__________________________________________________