An AHA Moment - Opinions???

[Guest guest]

(I sent this to j's teachers/resource people at school tonight)

What do you think??

I am baffled.

How can my tender-hearted, compassionate, loving boy be such a bully

sometimes?

He would protect a butterfly with his life, yet turn around and hit

or bite or twist the arm of a person.

So I've been chewing on this all day. I think I've come up with an

idea. And if this is the case, perhaps it is a step in the right

direction to helping him.

would never ever hit or bite or kick me. Not even in a

state of utter meltdown. I don't believe he would do any of that to

his Dad or sister or for that matter to any of you.

Why?

Because WE are real to him. We have established relationships. WE

are part of his " inner circle " of real humans.

I think, perhaps, when he is aggressive towards someone, he's not

seeing them as a real person, but as an object in the way of getting

what he wants.

I know that when he was very little, he did not have any connections

with people. Things, yes...people no. He's moved on to a place where

some people are valuable, but, on the whole, I'm not sure in his mind

he understands the value of all.

He and I were talking about this today, and he kept assuring me how

he would never hurt a butterfly or an animal, not EVER. He loves

them all. I would ask him about people, and I got no response...not

really.

So how do we help him realize the value and worth of every life? How

can we help him to see that a human is way more valuable than a

butterfly?

Maybe I'm rambling, but I think there is something to all this.

Any thoughts??

Donna