What should I do???

[Guest guest]

I could use some advice here! My 5 year old AS son has been getting

more violent lately, especially with his 3 year old brother. He

hits, kicks, pushes, and throws things at him. The other day he even

bit his brother. I'll either hear it or see it and ask what

happened. He tells me (after very little prodding) that he hit,

pushed, etc., his brother. He'll say sorry right away and then I'll

make him sit on the " thinking chair " . He doesn't mind the chair at

all so it's not a big punishment unfortunately.

I'll talk to him about why he's on the chair and he knows it's

because he hit and we do NOT hit people. He'll recite the reasons

why and say he's sorry for it. Today he jumped on his brother's

chest while laying on the floor. I told him that if he does things

like that he could really hurt someone. He asked, " What then? " and I

told him the person might have to go to the doctor or even be put in

the hospital. He sounded like that bothered him. I've also asked

him if he'd want to play with someone who hit him? Of course he says

no and I tell him that people might not want to play with him if he

keeps hitting.

I don't know what more to do. I'd like to do a reward chart for not

hitting but there's no way he'd go all day without being somewhat

violent. I'd have to make it by the hour. LOL. I want to stress

that I'm not afraid of this violence. It's basic sibling rivalry but

as with most AS behavior, just more exaggerated than typical. I

don't think we favor the younger son. He does plenty to be scolded

for too but he's 3 and does get away with certain things his older

brother doesn't. We try not to 'baby' him when he's hurt too much.

He's very quick to shake-off the little stuff. He's also not above

slugging his brother back.

We've thought about a punching bag or something to help him with his

aggressive behavior but we want to be cautious not to encourage the

behavior either and honestly, it seems to happen so fast for him that

he doesn't have a chance to make another choice. If his anger would

slowly bubble up, I think I'd have something to work with.

Unfortunately, he has his mother's short fuse!

Sorry about the long story! This group is my only network to talk to

about our son. We don't know anyone else so I could use all the help

and advice you have to offer!!!

Thanks,

Noel