Re: Ready to give up vent/rant/need shoulders to cry one

[Guest guest]

Oh, Kerrie. This is so heartbreaking to read.

I don't think I have much good advice, but I will be praying for you

and your little guy today.

Allow yourself time to figure this out. Even a month's break from all

biomed interventions might make things clearer without being the end

of the world.

Can you post a detailed list of supplements, etc?

René

>

> I'm so ready to call it quits, accept my son for the way he is and

go on

> with our lives. I

> can't do this anymore. I just feel like I need to come to terms

with this and

> make the best of what we have instead of everyday killing myself

with hopes of

> what will never be.

>

> Kerrie

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Kerrie,

Sorry you are having such a hard time. Yes, as Rene` has suggested please post

some specifics, and consider the heat, everything seems worse to just about

everybody in this heat.

Wishing you better days ahead.

[ ] Re: Ready to give up vent/rant/need shoulders to cry

one

Oh, Kerrie. This is so heartbreaking to read.

I don't think I have much good advice, but I will be praying for you

and your little guy today.

Allow yourself time to figure this out. Even a month's break from all

biomed interventions might make things clearer without being the end

of the world.

Can you post a detailed list of supplements, etc?

René

>

> I'm so ready to call it quits, accept my son for the way he is and

go on

> with our lives. I

> can't do this anymore. I just feel like I need to come to terms

with this and

> make the best of what we have instead of everyday killing myself

with hopes of

> what will never be.

>

> Kerrie

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 8/2/2006 6:36:22 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

joshisims@... writes:

Can you post a detailed list of supplements, etc?

René

In a message dated 8/2/2006 11:16:38 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

m.chelap@... writes:

Kerrie, if you're up for it, post the details (supplements, chelation

protocol, timing, etc.,

what you've done over the last year, etc.) and listmates will go over it.

We started on Andy Cutler's protocol last July. I started chelating with

DMSA then added in ALA. We were using his suggested supplements. In November we

started seeing Dr. Neubrander, added MB12 shots and worked up to his

supplement requirements. We started with the shots every three days, added nasal

spray, then went to high dose daily.

I tried GFCF last year. We did it for about 3 months before stopping. We

didn't see anything but that is because there were constant infractions. If a

sub aide was in my son's room I'd pick him up and hear " sorry, no one told me

he couldn't have goldfish and I gave him one at circle time, " or " he grabbed

food from another child's plate. " Also, his reward for being a good boy at his

chiropractor once a week was Mc's french fries and we all know the

deal with those now. I cannot control what he eats at school even if I send

food in. They can't seem to stop people from forgetting or screwing up even

with signs on the snack bin holder and the snack cabinet that say " is only

to eat food that comes from home. " They also seem to have issues of keeping

him from taking things off someone's plate. I was so proud I finally dove

in, made my own nuggets, cooked special things. The first week was hard then I

started to find a groove. It was a real kick in the teeth when I found out

that all that time he was not truly gluten free. I know I really should but I

don't think I can do that again. I also have family that insists " he can

have just one cookie right? It can't hurt. " Since they thought the diet was

cruel I'd never be able to leave him alone in a room with anyone for fear

they'd

sneak him something he should not have.

For Yeast we use these. Not all of them all of the time. GSE I only use when

its bad, Threelac when its moderate.

Culturelle

Pro Bio Gold

Primal Defense

Yeast Aid

GSE

Threelac

HNI Enzymes 1/4 tsp with each meal/snack

Some of these he gets once a day but some I divide up and spread out through

the day

Magnesium 300 mg

Calcium 1000mg

DRN Chelation booster (the Dr. Neubrander ones from Kirkman) 1 capsule a day

DRN Vitamin & Mineral Basic 5 capsules a day

Folinic Acid 600mcg

GABA 450 mg

Iron 9mg

Milk Thistle 180mg

MSM 450mg

Nordic Naturals Berry Keen 1 1/2 tsp

Borage Oil 300mg

L-Carnosine 200 mg

Klaire's Vitamin A 1 drop

Creatine 500mg

Zinc 60 mg

MB12 injections. He's on high dose daily

MB12 nasal spray, one spray daily

We have done 31 rounds of chelation. we started with just DMSA then added

ALA.

Thanks everyone for your support. I hate being this down because I know it

doesn't help my son. Its just terrible when I get so down and cannot even

handle being around him.

Kerrie

[Guest guest]

What did the hair test show? Did you try Andy's protocol? Consider the SonRise

program. You can rent the video from Option Institute.

S S

<p>I'm so ready to call it quits, accept my son for the way he is

and go on <br>

with our lives. He was diagnosed with PDD-NOS at 22 months. He was getting ABA

<br>

by his second birthday. I spent a ton of time researching and read all about

<br>

chelation/diets/<wbr>supplements. We stopped the ABA after 6 months because my

son <br>

who is very passive and laid back got very violent and aggressive. He entered

<br>

an integrated class of 12. After looking at his schools ABA class program we

<br>

decided he would be the highest functioning child and would not gain much <br>

from that setting. He did fairly well in his integrated class of 12. Although

<br>

I read about all the biomed stuff the real life people I was dealing with <br>

scared me off the idea and I let it rest. Finally, last July when he was 3 yrs

7 <br>

mos I started with supplements and oral chelation with DMSA/ALA. <br>

<br>

On these groups I heard about these great protocols and certain doctors <br>

names. At the time one was mentioned all the time and I would have given my

<br>

right arm to get in with this doctor. We did. Shortly after we started I rarely

<br>

heard that doctors name or protocol mentioned, and many have moved on to <br>

another protocol. We've tried supplements that have done wonders for others.

We <br>

have seen some gains but nothing life changing. My son is really not all <br>

that different than he was this time last year. I thought he was doing great

<br>

until I watched video from last summer and realized he really isn't. Sure, <br>

he's talking much more, but his speech is mostly echolalia, scripting and the

<br>

constant repetitive asking of the same nonsense questions without even waiting

<br>

for or caring if there is an answer. He still can't hold a conversation, <br>

doesn't write, won't even really hold any writing implement, he has absolutely

<br>

no social skills whatsoever. People do not exist to him. He has no fears, runs

<br>

off a the drop of a dime, and is getting aggressive (pinching and hitting me

<br>

only, no one else).<br>

<br>

I look now as we are getting ready to go to Kindergarten and leave the <br>

school we have been at for 2 1/2 years and its depressing. The kids who were in

<br>

the ABA program when we started moved to integrated rooms at some point this

<br>

year. A few are going into typical Kindergarten classes with a shadow, most <br>

are going integrated, and some are going into self contained rooms but not ABA

<br>

settings. There are 2 boys who are so completely typical you would never <br>

know anything was wrong with them. In the meantime, my son who started in an

<br>

integrated of 12 was moved to a self contained of 12, and is now going to a

<br>

Kindergarten class of 6, and its an ABA room. So why are we going backwards?

<br>

What is all this hard work with supplements and shots getting us? I just <br>

can't understand why so many kids whose parents are doing nothing biomedical

have <br>

surpassed us and we go backwards. Sad thing is some of these kids are kids I

<br>

looked at 2 years ago and said to myself " thank God my son is not like that,

<br>

I couldnt handle it. " Guess what? He's starting to be " like that " and I <br>

would kill for my son to be like they are now.<br>

<br>

I'm just so down. I know its a marathon, not a sprint, but we seem stuck <br>

in the starting gate. I just dont know what to do anymore. Everytime we start

<br>

something new, another protocol or treatment pops up that people seem to see

<br>

great things with. I feel like we are constantly one step behind in this and

<br>

cant catch up. We are beyond broke, my patience is gone, and even my family

<br>

members who were behind this in the beginning are starting to make comments <br>

like " why are you putting that poor kid through this. " We've done some of

<br>

the major things people have done and read about how great they were for the

<br>

kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but NOTHING. I'm

<br>

tired of the disappointment.<br>

<br>

I'm losing hope. I wasted alot of time. I made bad decisons. My son will <br>

be 5 in November and I feel like we've missed the biggest window of <br>

opportunity. I kick myself everyday for not sticking with the ABA and not

starting <br>

biomed when I first started reading about it when he had just turned 2. I can't

<br>

help but wonder what our lives would be like now if I had. I hate that my son

<br>

will pay for the rest of his life for mistakes I made 2 1/2 years ago. I <br>

can't do this anymore. I just feel like I need to come to terms with this and

<br>

make the best of what we have instead of everyday killing myself with hopes of

<br>

what will never be. <br>

<br>

Kerrie<br>

_______________________________________________

Join Excite! - http://www.excite.com

The most personalized portal on the Web!

[Guest guest]

> We've done some of

> the major things people have done and read about how great they were

for the

> kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

NOTHING. I'm

> tired of the disappointment.

Kerrie,

I'm sorry you're in such a bad place right now. Let me try to dig you

out .

1. Try very very hard not to blame yourself for your son's condition.

Our world is poisoned -- that is not your fault. If your son got vax

exposure, you trusted mainstream medicine like most of us here did,

and there was no way for us to know beforehand what the effects would

be. And as Andy always says, stewing in a lot of guilt will not help

your child get better -- you have to look at the present and future

and let the past go.

2. The fact that our children have different biochemistries means that

there isn't One Single Treatment that will cure them all. It means

that we have to spend a lot of time and energy doing trial and error,

to see if we can hit on something that will help. It means trying a

lot of stuff that does not work at all, or even makes them temporarily

worse. That is just part of the process. It can't be avoided. Trying

treatments that don't work does *not mean you have failed or biomed

won't work.

I suggest looking for kids whose symptoms and reactions to things seem

similar to yours and trying what works for them. I'm sick of hearing

" every child is different " -- sure it's true but there are distinct

sub-groups and we can try to make use of that.

3. The path to recovery is painfully slow and not remotely linear.

I've been lucky enough that my son responded very well to some

interventions -- Feingold Diet, Houston enzymes, chelation, ViraStop

-- and each time, when I saw the great response, I thought, " WHEW!

Goodbye to autism! " only to watch the improvement fade. Sometimes he

would end up worse off than before, with a different set of symptoms.

Very often gut problems -- yeast most commonly, also undiscovered food

intolerances -- mask improvements, and so he would actually be getting

better but the improvement wasn't visible.

Even now, after 81 rounds of chelation and his dx removed, n has

days where he regresses pretty dramatically. But as I've plugged away

at biomed, working on metals, viruses, and gut at the same time, the

regressions are less frequent, less scary, and shorter. During these

3.5 years on any given day he could have seemed severely autistic or

completely recovered, depending on the day. It's a looooooooong road,

and we have to force ourselves to take the long view and not get stuck

on any particular moment as being the Truth of how things are.

4. There is no " window of opportunity " age-wise that once passed means

your child is doomed. Children and people of all ages have showed

significant improvement on this list, and your child is still really

young.

I understand your frustration, and your impatience. The fact that the

biomed trench is where we're having to spend so much time SUCKS. I try

to just have that feeling -- the injustice, the stupidity, the deep

disappointment -- and then let it go by. It's not nothing that there's

a whole community of people here who are living it with you.

Hang in there. Any chance you can get some time to yourself today, to

go for a walk or a swim or something autism-free?

Nell

[Guest guest]

This is a great post! So very true and helpful, someone should keep it and post

it whenever any of us gets to this place, wish it was me but computer

illiterate.

[ ] Re: Ready to give up vent/rant/need shoulders to cry

one

> We've done some of

> the major things people have done and read about how great they were

for the

> kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

NOTHING. I'm

> tired of the disappointment.

Kerrie,

I'm sorry you're in such a bad place right now. Let me try to dig you

out .

1. Try very very hard not to blame yourself for your son's condition.

Our world is poisoned -- that is not your fault. If your son got vax

exposure, you trusted mainstream medicine like most of us here did,

and there was no way for us to know beforehand what the effects would

be. And as Andy always says, stewing in a lot of guilt will not help

your child get better -- you have to look at the present and future

and let the past go.

2. The fact that our children have different biochemistries means that

there isn't One Single Treatment that will cure them all. It means

that we have to spend a lot of time and energy doing trial and error,

to see if we can hit on something that will help. It means trying a

lot of stuff that does not work at all, or even makes them temporarily

worse. That is just part of the process. It can't be avoided. Trying

treatments that don't work does *not mean you have failed or biomed

won't work.

I suggest looking for kids whose symptoms and reactions to things seem

similar to yours and trying what works for them. I'm sick of hearing

" every child is different " -- sure it's true but there are distinct

sub-groups and we can try to make use of that.

3. The path to recovery is painfully slow and not remotely linear.

I've been lucky enough that my son responded very well to some

interventions -- Feingold Diet, Houston enzymes, chelation, ViraStop

-- and each time, when I saw the great response, I thought, " WHEW!

Goodbye to autism! " only to watch the improvement fade. Sometimes he

would end up worse off than before, with a different set of symptoms.

Very often gut problems -- yeast most commonly, also undiscovered food

intolerances -- mask improvements, and so he would actually be getting

better but the improvement wasn't visible.

Even now, after 81 rounds of chelation and his dx removed, n has

days where he regresses pretty dramatically. But as I've plugged away

at biomed, working on metals, viruses, and gut at the same time, the

regressions are less frequent, less scary, and shorter. During these

3.5 years on any given day he could have seemed severely autistic or

completely recovered, depending on the day. It's a looooooooong road,

and we have to force ourselves to take the long view and not get stuck

on any particular moment as being the Truth of how things are.

4. There is no " window of opportunity " age-wise that once passed means

your child is doomed. Children and people of all ages have showed

significant improvement on this list, and your child is still really

young.

I understand your frustration, and your impatience. The fact that the

biomed trench is where we're having to spend so much time SUCKS. I try

to just have that feeling -- the injustice, the stupidity, the deep

disappointment -- and then let it go by. It's not nothing that there's

a whole community of people here who are living it with you.

Hang in there. Any chance you can get some time to yourself today, to

go for a walk or a swim or something autism-free?

Nell

[Guest guest]

Nell,

Thank you for this amazing post. Kerrie is not the only one who

needed it....

Anne

>

> > We've done some of

> > the major things people have done and read about how great they

were

> for the

> > kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

> NOTHING. I'm

> > tired of the disappointment.

>

> Kerrie,

>

> I'm sorry you're in such a bad place right now. Let me try to dig

you

> out .

>

> 1. Try very very hard not to blame yourself for your son's

condition.

> Our world is poisoned -- that is not your fault. If your son got vax

> exposure, you trusted mainstream medicine like most of us here did,

> and there was no way for us to know beforehand what the effects

would

> be. And as Andy always says, stewing in a lot of guilt will not help

> your child get better -- you have to look at the present and future

> and let the past go.

>

> 2. The fact that our children have different biochemistries means

that

> there isn't One Single Treatment that will cure them all. It means

> that we have to spend a lot of time and energy doing trial and

error,

> to see if we can hit on something that will help. It means trying a

> lot of stuff that does not work at all, or even makes them

temporarily

> worse. That is just part of the process. It can't be avoided. Trying

> treatments that don't work does *not mean you have failed or biomed

> won't work.

>

> I suggest looking for kids whose symptoms and reactions to things

seem

> similar to yours and trying what works for them. I'm sick of hearing

> " every child is different " -- sure it's true but there are distinct

> sub-groups and we can try to make use of that.

>

> 3. The path to recovery is painfully slow and not remotely linear.

> I've been lucky enough that my son responded very well to some

> interventions -- Feingold Diet, Houston enzymes, chelation, ViraStop

> -- and each time, when I saw the great response, I thought, " WHEW!

> Goodbye to autism! " only to watch the improvement fade. Sometimes he

> would end up worse off than before, with a different set of

symptoms.

> Very often gut problems -- yeast most commonly, also undiscovered

food

> intolerances -- mask improvements, and so he would actually be

getting

> better but the improvement wasn't visible.

>

> Even now, after 81 rounds of chelation and his dx removed, n

has

> days where he regresses pretty dramatically. But as I've plugged

away

> at biomed, working on metals, viruses, and gut at the same time, the

> regressions are less frequent, less scary, and shorter. During these

> 3.5 years on any given day he could have seemed severely autistic or

> completely recovered, depending on the day. It's a looooooooong

road,

> and we have to force ourselves to take the long view and not get

stuck

> on any particular moment as being the Truth of how things are.

>

> 4. There is no " window of opportunity " age-wise that once passed

means

> your child is doomed. Children and people of all ages have showed

> significant improvement on this list, and your child is still really

> young.

>

> I understand your frustration, and your impatience. The fact that

the

> biomed trench is where we're having to spend so much time SUCKS. I

try

> to just have that feeling -- the injustice, the stupidity, the deep

> disappointment -- and then let it go by. It's not nothing that

there's

> a whole community of people here who are living it with you.

>

> Hang in there. Any chance you can get some time to yourself today,

to

> go for a walk or a swim or something autism-free?

>

> Nell

>

[Guest guest]

Nell thank you for this great post. Something that I myself need to

read at least once a week! Kerrie-thank you for expressing the same

exact feelings/disappointments that we have ALL had at many different

times on this extraordinary journey of healing our children.

Sometimes I get so very angry at our situation and the injustices

that have been placed upon our innocent children, then I force myself

to realize that anger is not going to help my child at all. The

only thing that will help her is my commitment to keep plugging

along, getting the poison out of her little body, and trying other

things along the way that might also be helpful.

Keep the faith and don't give up! It takes YEARS to get to where we

want to go and many ups and downs along the way. As Nell said, we

are all on the same path and you are not at all alone in this.

Sheresa

>

> > We've done some of

> > the major things people have done and read about how great they

were

> for the

> > kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

> NOTHING. I'm

> > tired of the disappointment.

>

> Kerrie,

>

> I'm sorry you're in such a bad place right now. Let me try to dig

you

> out .

>

> 1. Try very very hard not to blame yourself for your son's

condition.

> Our world is poisoned -- that is not your fault. If your son got vax

> exposure, you trusted mainstream medicine like most of us here did,

> and there was no way for us to know beforehand what the effects

would

> be. And as Andy always says, stewing in a lot of guilt will not help

> your child get better -- you have to look at the present and future

> and let the past go.

>

> 2. The fact that our children have different biochemistries means

that

> there isn't One Single Treatment that will cure them all. It means

> that we have to spend a lot of time and energy doing trial and

error,

> to see if we can hit on something that will help. It means trying a

> lot of stuff that does not work at all, or even makes them

temporarily

> worse. That is just part of the process. It can't be avoided. Trying

> treatments that don't work does *not mean you have failed or biomed

> won't work.

>

> I suggest looking for kids whose symptoms and reactions to things

seem

> similar to yours and trying what works for them. I'm sick of hearing

> " every child is different " -- sure it's true but there are distinct

> sub-groups and we can try to make use of that.

>

> 3. The path to recovery is painfully slow and not remotely linear.

> I've been lucky enough that my son responded very well to some

> interventions -- Feingold Diet, Houston enzymes, chelation, ViraStop

> -- and each time, when I saw the great response, I thought, " WHEW!

> Goodbye to autism! " only to watch the improvement fade. Sometimes he

> would end up worse off than before, with a different set of

symptoms.

> Very often gut problems -- yeast most commonly, also undiscovered

food

> intolerances -- mask improvements, and so he would actually be

getting

> better but the improvement wasn't visible.

>

> Even now, after 81 rounds of chelation and his dx removed, n

has

> days where he regresses pretty dramatically. But as I've plugged

away

> at biomed, working on metals, viruses, and gut at the same time, the

> regressions are less frequent, less scary, and shorter. During these

> 3.5 years on any given day he could have seemed severely autistic or

> completely recovered, depending on the day. It's a looooooooong

road,

> and we have to force ourselves to take the long view and not get

stuck

> on any particular moment as being the Truth of how things are.

>

> 4. There is no " window of opportunity " age-wise that once passed

means

> your child is doomed. Children and people of all ages have showed

> significant improvement on this list, and your child is still really

> young.

>

> I understand your frustration, and your impatience. The fact that

the

> biomed trench is where we're having to spend so much time SUCKS. I

try

> to just have that feeling -- the injustice, the stupidity, the deep

> disappointment -- and then let it go by. It's not nothing that

there's

> a whole community of people here who are living it with you.

>

> Hang in there. Any chance you can get some time to yourself today,

to

> go for a walk or a swim or something autism-free?

>

> Nell

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you so much for your post, I printed it out and put it in my journel. I

will read it everytime I need to hear those words again.

Deana

anneecbrynn <abrynn@...> wrote:

Nell,

Thank you for this amazing post. Kerrie is not the only one who

needed it....

Anne

>

> > We've done some of

> > the major things people have done and read about how great they

were

> for the

> > kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

> NOTHING. I'm

> > tired of the disappointment.

>

> Kerrie,

>

> I'm sorry you're in such a bad place right now. Let me try to dig

you

> out .

>

> 1. Try very very hard not to blame yourself for your son's

condition.

> Our world is poisoned -- that is not your fault. If your son got vax

> exposure, you trusted mainstream medicine like most of us here did,

> and there was no way for us to know beforehand what the effects

would

> be. And as Andy always says, stewing in a lot of guilt will not help

> your child get better -- you have to look at the present and future

> and let the past go.

>

> 2. The fact that our children have different biochemistries means

that

> there isn't One Single Treatment that will cure them all. It means

> that we have to spend a lot of time and energy doing trial and

error,

> to see if we can hit on something that will help. It means trying a

> lot of stuff that does not work at all, or even makes them

temporarily

> worse. That is just part of the process. It can't be avoided. Trying

> treatments that don't work does *not mean you have failed or biomed

> won't work.

>

> I suggest looking for kids whose symptoms and reactions to things

seem

> similar to yours and trying what works for them. I'm sick of hearing

> " every child is different " -- sure it's true but there are distinct

> sub-groups and we can try to make use of that.

>

> 3. The path to recovery is painfully slow and not remotely linear.

> I've been lucky enough that my son responded very well to some

> interventions -- Feingold Diet, Houston enzymes, chelation, ViraStop

> -- and each time, when I saw the great response, I thought, " WHEW!

> Goodbye to autism! " only to watch the improvement fade. Sometimes he

> would end up worse off than before, with a different set of

symptoms.

> Very often gut problems -- yeast most commonly, also undiscovered

food

> intolerances -- mask improvements, and so he would actually be

getting

> better but the improvement wasn't visible.

>

> Even now, after 81 rounds of chelation and his dx removed, n

has

> days where he regresses pretty dramatically. But as I've plugged

away

> at biomed, working on metals, viruses, and gut at the same time, the

> regressions are less frequent, less scary, and shorter. During these

> 3.5 years on any given day he could have seemed severely autistic or

> completely recovered, depending on the day. It's a looooooooong

road,

> and we have to force ourselves to take the long view and not get

stuck

> on any particular moment as being the Truth of how things are.

>

> 4. There is no " window of opportunity " age-wise that once passed

means

> your child is doomed. Children and people of all ages have showed

> significant improvement on this list, and your child is still really

> young.

>

> I understand your frustration, and your impatience. The fact that

the

> biomed trench is where we're having to spend so much time SUCKS. I

try

> to just have that feeling -- the injustice, the stupidity, the deep

> disappointment -- and then let it go by. It's not nothing that

there's

> a whole community of people here who are living it with you.

>

> Hang in there. Any chance you can get some time to yourself today,

to

> go for a walk or a swim or something autism-free?

>

> Nell

>

[Guest guest]

Oh Kerrie,

My heart goes out to you, but please - never give up!

Carolyn J

[Guest guest]

Kerrie, if you're up for it, post the details (supplements, chelation protocol,

timing, etc.,

what you've done over the last year, etc.) and listmates will go over it.

One thought I had while reading your post is that perhaps your son hasn't been

on Andy's

protocol long enough, and you might be in the stall/regression period. I've

lent out my

copy of Amalgam Illness, but I think the explanation is on page 52.

Here is recent post by Andy which talks about the stall.

/message/178468

Hang in there, and I'm sorry you're feeling so down.

in Illinois

[Guest guest]

Kerrie,

I ran a search on Onibasu for " MB12 andrewhallcutler " . Not sure if there will

be something

useful in there for you or not.

The Peptizyde your son is taking may eliminate the need for GFCF.

Wish I could help more.

in Illinois

[Guest guest]

Kerrie, I have looked at your supplements and I don't see *too many

red flags - maybe , Dana or some other experienced people here

will also take a look. However, you could probably use a lot more

vitamin C than you're getting in the DRN product. It looks like your

son is getting less than 750 mg per day, but you could probably go up

to 4 grams per day (divided by 4) without problems, as long as he

doesn't get diarrhea. Also, the combined selenium between both DRN

products seems pretty high - almost 225 mcg. I think 100mcg per day

is probably lots for a child of your son's age. Selenium can be

toxic at higher levels. Other things - like the manganese, iron,

etc. may be a problem. Manganese looks like it might be really high -

almost 8 mg per day. Andy recommends avoiding it, or just using it

at RDA levels. For a 4-6 year old, this would be 1.5 - 2 mg per

day. I know that iron is often a tricky one for mercury toxic

people, and again one that Andy says to avoid unless iron levels

(ferritin) is frankly low. MSM is also listed by Andy as one of the

supplements to avoid, as it may mobilize mercury. Beta carotene is a

problem for some kids, too. Did any of these supplements cause a

good/bad/strange reaction when you added them in?

Have you considered or tried antiviral protocols, immune modulators,

etc? This seems to be a *huge* component of ASD for a lot of kids,

maybe most.

Have you ever considered hiring Andy to help as a consultant? It

sounds like things are pretty desparate for you right now. It would

be an extra expense, but since Andy has a fairly different take on

biomed than most DAN! docs, he would have some really valuable

insights. Of course, a lot of his information is available for free

using Onibasu. Really reading through his books - I have to re-read

them a lot, my brain's not so good these days - is also another low-

cost option.

Other people have reported success with the Yasko protocol after

having met with limited success using DAN approaches. I know almost

nothing about her protocol, and it seems really

expensive/complicated. Still, it's another take on things and may

address problems for some kids that other protocols miss. Homeopathy

is yet another, very different approach that is working very well for

some people. Here's an autism group for homeopathy:

Homeopathy-ADDthruAUTISM/?

yguid=198943229

Sorry, Kerrie, I'm not trying to overload you. I'm just

brainstorming. Please let us know how things are going.

take care

René

> For Yeast we use these. Not all of them all of the time. GSE I only

use when

> its bad, Threelac when its moderate.

> Culturelle

> Pro Bio Gold

> Primal Defense

> Yeast Aid

> GSE

> Threelac

>

> HNI Enzymes 1/4 tsp with each meal/snack

>

> Some of these he gets once a day but some I divide up and spread

out through

> the day

> Magnesium 300 mg

> Calcium 1000mg

> DRN Chelation booster (the Dr. Neubrander ones from Kirkman) 1

capsule a day

> DRN Vitamin & Mineral Basic 5 capsules a day

> Folinic Acid 600mcg

> GABA 450 mg

> Iron 9mg

> Milk Thistle 180mg

> MSM 450mg

> Nordic Naturals Berry Keen 1 1/2 tsp

> Borage Oil 300mg

> L-Carnosine 200 mg

> Klaire's Vitamin A 1 drop

> Creatine 500mg

> Zinc 60 mg

> MB12 injections. He's on high dose daily

> MB12 nasal spray, one spray daily

[Guest guest]

I have found that when all else fails (I don't know what you have / have not

tried) you should test your son for high testosterone. High testosterone seems

to make other therapies like chelation and MB12 ineffective. When you test, be

sure to stop all therapies (other than vitamins) for 3 weeks. Please listen to

the Geiers:

http://www.autismmedia.org/media4.html

joshisims <joshisims@...> wrote: Oh, Kerrie. This is so

heartbreaking to read.

I don't think I have much good advice, but I will be praying for you

and your little guy today.

Allow yourself time to figure this out. Even a month's break from all

biomed interventions might make things clearer without being the end

of the world.

Can you post a detailed list of supplements, etc?

René

>

> I'm so ready to call it quits, accept my son for the way he is and

go on

> with our lives. I

> can't do this anymore. I just feel like I need to come to terms

with this and

> make the best of what we have instead of everyday killing myself

with hopes of

> what will never be.

>

> Kerrie

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

This is a great post, by Nell, who is on the A-M board and this one too, I think. As usual, from Nell, very practical, common sense comments that are good to read on days when you think you have reached the end of your rope.

----- Original Message ----- From: lanellici

--- > We've done some of > the major things people have done and read about how great they werefor the > kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, butNOTHING. I'm > tired of the disappointment.

I'm sorry you're in such a bad place right now. Let me try to dig youout .1. Try very very hard not to blame yourself for your son's condition.Our world is poisoned -- that is not your fault. If your son got vaxexposure, you trusted mainstream medicine like most of us here did,and there was no way for us to know beforehand what the effects wouldbe. And as Andy always says, stewing in a lot of guilt will not helpyour child get better -- you have to look at the present and futureand let the past go.2. The fact that our children have different biochemistries means thatthere isn't One Single Treatment that will cure them all. It meansthat we have to spend a lot of time and energy doing trial and error,to see if we can hit on something that will help. It means trying alot of stuff that does not work at all, or even makes them temporarilyworse. That is just part of the process. It can't be avoided. Tryingtreatments that don't work does *not mean you have failed or biomedwon't work.I suggest looking for kids whose symptoms and reactions to things seemsimilar to yours and trying what works for them. I'm sick of hearing"every child is different" -- sure it's true but there are distinctsub-groups and we can try to make use of that.3. The path to recovery is painfully slow and not remotely linear.I've been lucky enough that my son responded very well to someinterventions -- Feingold Diet, Houston enzymes, chelation, ViraStop-- and each time, when I saw the great response, I thought, "WHEW!Goodbye to autism!" only to watch the improvement fade. Sometimes hewould end up worse off than before, with a different set of symptoms.Very often gut problems -- yeast most commonly, also undiscovered foodintolerances -- mask improvements, and so he would actually be gettingbetter but the improvement wasn't visible.Even now, after 81 rounds of chelation and his dx removed, n hasdays where he regresses pretty dramatically. But as I've plugged awayat biomed, working on metals, viruses, and gut at the same time, theregressions are less frequent, less scary, and shorter. During these3.5 years on any given day he could have seemed severely autistic orcompletely recovered, depending on the day. It's a looooooooong road,and we have to force ourselves to take the long view and not get stuckon any particular moment as being the Truth of how things are.4. There is no "window of opportunity" age-wise that once passed meansyour child is doomed. Children and people of all ages have showedsignificant improvement on this list, and your child is still reallyyoung.I understand your frustration, and your impatience. The fact that thebiomed trench is where we're having to spend so much time SUCKS. I tryto just have that feeling -- the injustice, the stupidity, the deepdisappointment -- and then let it go by. It's not nothing that there'sa whole community of people here who are living it with you.Hang in there. Any chance you can get some time to yourself today, togo for a walk or a swim or something autism-free?Nell

[Guest guest]

>

> I'm so ready to call it quits, accept my son for the way he is and

go on

> with our lives.

I know several people who have done this, and are satisfied with their

decision. I know how frustrating it is to figure things out, so I

certainly can't blame anyone who makes this decision.

>>We've tried supplements that have done wonders for others. We

> have seen some gains but nothing life changing.

I can soooooo much relate to this! I have always envied those who can

say they added ONE supplement and it was the KEY!

>>My son is really not all

> that different than he was this time last year.

Once my son no longer needed a supplement, it would cause the same

problems that initially it eliminated.

>>I thought he was doing great

> until I watched video from last summer and realized he really

isn't. Sure,

> he's talking much more, but his speech is mostly echolalia, scripting

For my son, this was eliminated with mB12, fish oil, and especially

folic acid.

>>and the

> constant repetitive asking of the same nonsense questions without

even waiting

> for or caring if there is an answer.

This was viral for my #4.

>>We've done some of

> the major things people have done and read about how great they were

for the

> kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

NOTHING. I'm

> tired of the disappointment.

Two things that really helped for my son:

1. Are there any supplements he does not tolerate? Figuring out WHY

my son did not tolerate supplements was VERY beneficial. Many times

there are things that are required to do FIRST, before something will

work.

2. Things that tended to work for certain other kids, also worked for

my #2, but only after I did other things first. This is sort of

related to point 1 above.

For example, B6, mB12, fish oil, and several other supplements, all

produced some good results for my son, but only AFTER I did other

things [sometimes a LOT of other things] first.

> I'm losing hope. I wasted alot of time. I made bad decisons. My

son will

> be 5 in November and I feel like we've missed the biggest window of

> opportunity.

My son is 10-1/2. I did not start chelating him until he was 5-1/2.

My son is recovered [he still needs fish oil, but that's all], altho

not age appropriate. If you missed the biggest window of opportunity,

then where does that leave my son? But he talks, reads, does his

chores without complaining, makes his own breakfast, plays

appropriately with dollhouses and the Tank Engine, etc. He

acts like a 3-4yo child. The pedneuro who dx him at age 3-1/2 told me

he would never talk or even know I existed, and if I was *lucky*, he

*might* make it into a group home someday [otherwise, institution].

I wish my son was 5 again....

>>I hate that my son

> will pay for the rest of his life for mistakes I made 2 1/2 years ago.

I hate this too. But I decided " don't get mad, get even " . All the

people who told me vaccinating my son meant I was being a good mother,

all the people who told me my son was basically " worthless " because he

would never even talk or amount to anything, I wanted to prove them

all WRONG!

>>I just feel like I need to come to terms with this and

> make the best of what we have

Every day, make the best of what you have. Go in at night and look at

your son's sleeping face. That was a GREAT motivator for me. Look at

his face and promise him that you will love him no matter what, and

you will do whatever you can, to the best of your ability, to make his

life the best it can be. Then, if that day you need a break, take a

break and just love him. The next day, decide what you will do the

next day.

Prayer closet also works.

Dana

[Guest guest]

> I tried GFCF last year. We did it for about 3 months before

stopping. We

> didn't see anything but that is because there were constant infractions.

Try using HNI enzymes as much as you can, keep chelating, and add B

vitamins when he tolerates them, selenium if required. At the end of

all that, my son tolerated all foods.

Consider taking a break from all supplements for at least a week, then

add them back one at a time. I will make a few specific comments.

> Magnesium 300 mg

> Calcium 1000mg

For that dose of calcium, you should be giving 500mg magnesium.

Does your son need calcium? My son was calcium toxic, despite two

years of cf without supplementation.

> Folinic Acid 600mcg

My son needed a lot more than this, especially if given with high

doses of mB12.

> Iron 9mg

My son was iron toxic.

> Borage Oil 300mg

You might be able to progress to flax or fish oil now. Does he have

problems with EFAs? If so, consider mito cocktail and amino acids

http://www.danasview.net/mar05.htm

Dana

[Guest guest]

I want to suggest you do something. Please don't just skip this and

forget about it. Please go here: http://www.danwebcast.com/ and

register. Don't worry, they don't send you spam. Once you get a code

that makes it so you can open or download the presentations, click on

the Washington, DC - April 7-9, 2006 conference and download the

presentation called Diet and Autism Panel: 's Story or DAN! =

Diets are Non-Negotiable! by Judy Gorman

Then watch the presentation from one end to the other. Some of the

things you have said here make me think she might have an answer for you.

But I want to say something more. Every time a DAN! conference video

comes on, I watch all of the speeches. The reason is that these

people, these professionals and often parents, are working as hard as

possible to find solutions for our kids. Every new conference has new

information. It is doubtless that if you haven't looked into DAN! for

a while, that the information you have is outdated. Lots of

non-responding kids are finding their ways to life without autism.

Let me names some new therapies that have brought quite a few kids

around: Valtrex, MB12 shots, MB12 nasal spray, SCD, low oxilate,

HBOT, and Low dose Naltrexone. IF any of these sound like gibberish,

your information is outdated. That's very good news. Find out what

is out their now and think it over. I think you will find many

answers and new hope.

>

> I'm so ready to call it quits, accept my son for the way he is and

go on

> with our lives. He was diagnosed with PDD-NOS at 22 months. He was

getting ABA

> by his second birthday. I spent a ton of time researching and read

all about

> chelation/diets/supplements. We stopped the ABA after 6 months

because my son

> who is very passive and laid back got very violent and aggressive.

He entered

> an integrated class of 12. After looking at his schools ABA class

program we

> decided he would be the highest functioning child and would not gain

much

> from that setting. He did fairly well in his integrated class of 12.

Although

> I read about all the biomed stuff the real life people I was dealing

with

> scared me off the idea and I let it rest. Finally, last July when he

was 3 yrs 7

> mos I started with supplements and oral chelation with DMSA/ALA.

>

> On these groups I heard about these great protocols and certain

doctors

> names. At the time one was mentioned all the time and I would have

given my

> right arm to get in with this doctor. We did. Shortly after we

started I rarely

> heard that doctors name or protocol mentioned, and many have moved

on to

> another protocol. We've tried supplements that have done wonders

for others. We

> have seen some gains but nothing life changing. My son is really

not all

> that different than he was this time last year. I thought he was

doing great

> until I watched video from last summer and realized he really

isn't. Sure,

> he's talking much more, but his speech is mostly echolalia,

scripting and the

> constant repetitive asking of the same nonsense questions without

even waiting

> for or caring if there is an answer. He still can't hold a

conversation,

> doesn't write, won't even really hold any writing implement, he has

absolutely

> no social skills whatsoever. People do not exist to him. He has no

fears, runs

> off a the drop of a dime, and is getting aggressive (pinching and

hitting me

> only, no one else).

>

> I look now as we are getting ready to go to Kindergarten and leave

the

> school we have been at for 2 1/2 years and its depressing. The kids

who were in

> the ABA program when we started moved to integrated rooms at some

point this

> year. A few are going into typical Kindergarten classes with a

shadow, most

> are going integrated, and some are going into self contained rooms

but not ABA

> settings. There are 2 boys who are so completely typical you would

never

> know anything was wrong with them. In the meantime, my son who

started in an

> integrated of 12 was moved to a self contained of 12, and is now

going to a

> Kindergarten class of 6, and its an ABA room. So why are we going

backwards?

> What is all this hard work with supplements and shots getting us?

I just

> can't understand why so many kids whose parents are doing nothing

biomedical have

> surpassed us and we go backwards. Sad thing is some of these kids

are kids I

> looked at 2 years ago and said to myself " thank God my son is not

like that,

> I couldnt handle it. " Guess what? He's starting to be " like that "

and I

> would kill for my son to be like they are now.

>

> I'm just so down. I know its a marathon, not a sprint, but we seem

stuck

> in the starting gate. I just dont know what to do anymore.

Everytime we start

> something new, another protocol or treatment pops up that people

seem to see

> great things with. I feel like we are constantly one step behind in

this and

> cant catch up. We are beyond broke, my patience is gone, and even my

family

> members who were behind this in the beginning are starting to make

comments

> like " why are you putting that poor kid through this. " We've done

some of

> the major things people have done and read about how great they were

for the

> kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

NOTHING. I'm

> tired of the disappointment.

>

> I'm losing hope. I wasted alot of time. I made bad decisons. My

son will

> be 5 in November and I feel like we've missed the biggest window of

> opportunity. I kick myself everyday for not sticking with the ABA

and not starting

> biomed when I first started reading about it when he had just turned

2. I can't

> help but wonder what our lives would be like now if I had. I hate

that my son

> will pay for the rest of his life for mistakes I made 2 1/2 years

ago. I

> can't do this anymore. I just feel like I need to come to terms

with this and

> make the best of what we have instead of everyday killing myself

with hopes of

> what will never be.

>

> Kerrie

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

i totally feel you! wanted to do same except im so darn hard headed! i just

cant stop trying although some days....believe me!

it took years before i saw positives with my son (over all). each tiny

improvement kept me going. after a while, it seemed i was continuing bio med

stuff just out of habit. although it's hard most of the time, i find the

strength to continue. call it self preservation or what ever.

what really gets me is that i know several parents who are not doing anything

bio med for their child and it seems the kids are progressing more than my son!

maybe there is something to this leaving well enough alone.

vicki

danasview <danasview@...> wrote:

>

> I'm so ready to call it quits, accept my son for the way he is and

go on

> with our lives.

I know several people who have done this, and are satisfied with their

decision. I know how frustrating it is to figure things out, so I

certainly can't blame anyone who makes this decision.

>>We've tried supplements that have done wonders for others. We

> have seen some gains but nothing life changing.

I can soooooo much relate to this! I have always envied those who can

say they added ONE supplement and it was the KEY!

>>My son is really not all

> that different than he was this time last year.

Once my son no longer needed a supplement, it would cause the same

problems that initially it eliminated.

>>I thought he was doing great

> until I watched video from last summer and realized he really

isn't. Sure,

> he's talking much more, but his speech is mostly echolalia, scripting

For my son, this was eliminated with mB12, fish oil, and especially

folic acid.

>>and the

> constant repetitive asking of the same nonsense questions without

even waiting

> for or caring if there is an answer.

This was viral for my #4.

>>We've done some of

> the major things people have done and read about how great they were

for the

> kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

NOTHING. I'm

> tired of the disappointment.

Two things that really helped for my son:

1. Are there any supplements he does not tolerate? Figuring out WHY

my son did not tolerate supplements was VERY beneficial. Many times

there are things that are required to do FIRST, before something will

work.

2. Things that tended to work for certain other kids, also worked for

my #2, but only after I did other things first. This is sort of

related to point 1 above.

For example, B6, mB12, fish oil, and several other supplements, all

produced some good results for my son, but only AFTER I did other

things [sometimes a LOT of other things] first.

> I'm losing hope. I wasted alot of time. I made bad decisons. My

son will

> be 5 in November and I feel like we've missed the biggest window of

> opportunity.

My son is 10-1/2. I did not start chelating him until he was 5-1/2.

My son is recovered [he still needs fish oil, but that's all], altho

not age appropriate. If you missed the biggest window of opportunity,

then where does that leave my son? But he talks, reads, does his

chores without complaining, makes his own breakfast, plays

appropriately with dollhouses and the Tank Engine, etc. He

acts like a 3-4yo child. The pedneuro who dx him at age 3-1/2 told me

he would never talk or even know I existed, and if I was *lucky*, he

*might* make it into a group home someday [otherwise, institution].

I wish my son was 5 again....

>>I hate that my son

> will pay for the rest of his life for mistakes I made 2 1/2 years ago.

I hate this too. But I decided " don't get mad, get even " . All the

people who told me vaccinating my son meant I was being a good mother,

all the people who told me my son was basically " worthless " because he

would never even talk or amount to anything, I wanted to prove them

all WRONG!

>>I just feel like I need to come to terms with this and

> make the best of what we have

Every day, make the best of what you have. Go in at night and look at

your son's sleeping face. That was a GREAT motivator for me. Look at

his face and promise him that you will love him no matter what, and

you will do whatever you can, to the best of your ability, to make his

life the best it can be. Then, if that day you need a break, take a

break and just love him. The next day, decide what you will do the

next day.

Prayer closet also works.

Dana

---------------------------------

Music Unlimited - Access over 1 million songs.Try it free.

[Guest guest]

I feel the same as you do! You are not alone in this battle. I know it is sooo

hard as it is almost to the point of divorce for my husband and I. He doesn't

understand (nor do I), but at least I try to educate myself. If it wasn't for

these groups, I don't really think I could try to get even!

I think Dana said it best when she said, take those breaks when you need too

and love him for who he is. Prayer with belief is the only thing keeping me and

my family going right now. I am praying for you and your family.

Jana

danasview <danasview@...> wrote:

>

> I'm so ready to call it quits, accept my son for the way he is and

go on

> with our lives.

I know several people who have done this, and are satisfied with their

decision. I know how frustrating it is to figure things out, so I

certainly can't blame anyone who makes this decision.

>>We've tried supplements that have done wonders for others. We

> have seen some gains but nothing life changing.

I can soooooo much relate to this! I have always envied those who can

say they added ONE supplement and it was the KEY!

>>My son is really not all

> that different than he was this time last year.

Once my son no longer needed a supplement, it would cause the same

problems that initially it eliminated.

>>I thought he was doing great

> until I watched video from last summer and realized he really

isn't. Sure,

> he's talking much more, but his speech is mostly echolalia, scripting

For my son, this was eliminated with mB12, fish oil, and especially

folic acid.

>>and the

> constant repetitive asking of the same nonsense questions without

even waiting

> for or caring if there is an answer.

This was viral for my #4.

>>We've done some of

> the major things people have done and read about how great they were

for the

> kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

NOTHING. I'm

> tired of the disappointment.

Two things that really helped for my son:

1. Are there any supplements he does not tolerate? Figuring out WHY

my son did not tolerate supplements was VERY beneficial. Many times

there are things that are required to do FIRST, before something will

work.

2. Things that tended to work for certain other kids, also worked for

my #2, but only after I did other things first. This is sort of

related to point 1 above.

For example, B6, mB12, fish oil, and several other supplements, all

produced some good results for my son, but only AFTER I did other

things [sometimes a LOT of other things] first.

> I'm losing hope. I wasted alot of time. I made bad decisons. My

son will

> be 5 in November and I feel like we've missed the biggest window of

> opportunity.

My son is 10-1/2. I did not start chelating him until he was 5-1/2.

My son is recovered [he still needs fish oil, but that's all], altho

not age appropriate. If you missed the biggest window of opportunity,

then where does that leave my son? But he talks, reads, does his

chores without complaining, makes his own breakfast, plays

appropriately with dollhouses and the Tank Engine, etc. He

acts like a 3-4yo child. The pedneuro who dx him at age 3-1/2 told me

he would never talk or even know I existed, and if I was *lucky*, he

*might* make it into a group home someday [otherwise, institution].

I wish my son was 5 again....

>>I hate that my son

> will pay for the rest of his life for mistakes I made 2 1/2 years ago.

I hate this too. But I decided " don't get mad, get even " . All the

people who told me vaccinating my son meant I was being a good mother,

all the people who told me my son was basically " worthless " because he

would never even talk or amount to anything, I wanted to prove them

all WRONG!

>>I just feel like I need to come to terms with this and

> make the best of what we have

Every day, make the best of what you have. Go in at night and look at

your son's sleeping face. That was a GREAT motivator for me. Look at

his face and promise him that you will love him no matter what, and

you will do whatever you can, to the best of your ability, to make his

life the best it can be. Then, if that day you need a break, take a

break and just love him. The next day, decide what you will do the

next day.

Prayer closet also works.

Dana

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the encouragement. It's a long and lonely road. Everyone

around me thinks being hopeful is unrealistic. The site is a great help.

CAn you suggest a good Dr in UK?

>

> This is a great post, by Nell, who is on the A-M board and this one

too, I think. As usual, from Nell, very practical, common sense comments

that are good to read on days when you think you have reached the end of

your rope.

>

>

> ----- Original Message -----

> From: lanellici

>

> ---

> > We've done some of

> > the major things people have done and read about how great they were

> for the

> > kid. Many of them we saw NOTHING, not a little improvement, but

> NOTHING. I'm

> > tired of the disappointment.

>

>

>

>

> I'm sorry you're in such a bad place right now. Let me try to dig you

> out .

>

> 1. Try very very hard not to blame yourself for your son's condition.

> Our world is poisoned -- that is not your fault. If your son got vax

> exposure, you trusted mainstream medicine like most of us here did,

> and there was no way for us to know beforehand what the effects would

> be. And as Andy always says, stewing in a lot of guilt will not help

> your child get better -- you have to look at the present and future

> and let the past go.

>

> 2. The fact that our children have different biochemistries means that

> there isn't One Single Treatment that will cure them all. It means

> that we have to spend a lot of time and energy doing trial and error,

> to see if we can hit on something that will help. It means trying a

> lot of stuff that does not work at all, or even makes them temporarily

> worse. That is just part of the process. It can't be avoided. Trying

> treatments that don't work does *not mean you have failed or biomed

> won't work.

>

> I suggest looking for kids whose symptoms and reactions to things seem

> similar to yours and trying what works for them. I'm sick of hearing

> " every child is different " -- sure it's true but there are distinct

> sub-groups and we can try to make use of that.

>

> 3. The path to recovery is painfully slow and not remotely linear.

> I've been lucky enough that my son responded very well to some

> interventions -- Feingold Diet, Houston enzymes, chelation, ViraStop

> -- and each time, when I saw the great response, I thought, " WHEW!

> Goodbye to autism! " only to watch the improvement fade. Sometimes he

> would end up worse off than before, with a different set of symptoms.

> Very often gut problems -- yeast most commonly, also undiscovered food

> intolerances -- mask improvements, and so he would actually be getting

> better but the improvement wasn't visible.

>

> Even now, after 81 rounds of chelation and his dx removed, n has

> days where he regresses pretty dramatically. But as I've plugged away

> at biomed, working on metals, viruses, and gut at the same time, the

> regressions are less frequent, less scary, and shorter. During these

> 3.5 years on any given day he could have seemed severely autistic or

> completely recovered, depending on the day. It's a looooooooong road,

> and we have to force ourselves to take the long view and not get stuck

> on any particular moment as being the Truth of how things are.

>

> 4. There is no " window of opportunity " age-wise that once passed means

> your child is doomed. Children and people of all ages have showed

> significant improvement on this list, and your child is still really

> young.

>

> I understand your frustration, and your impatience. The fact that the

> biomed trench is where we're having to spend so much time SUCKS. I try

> to just have that feeling -- the injustice, the stupidity, the deep

> disappointment -- and then let it go by. It's not nothing that there's

> a whole community of people here who are living it with you.

>

> Hang in there. Any chance you can get some time to yourself today, to

> go for a walk or a swim or something autism-free?

>

> Nell

>