My re-intro and dd's possible depression(has asperger's)...

[Guest guest]

Hi all,

I haven't been here for a long time, but I'm really in need of your

help.

My dd is almost 15 and was diagnosed with AS when she was 7 through

the school district. We homeschool now (have been for 5 years now).

We (me, my dh, and 3 other children) moved to Idaho from CA juast

back in Aug '06. I know kids who have AS have a difficult time with

change, but she didn't seem to have a problem with it so much until

early last month. She misses her old friends back in CA, as well as

family (we all do),but she has made some new friends here, but says

she feels out of place and different, compared to them. She complains

that her friends seem to act " too old " ---talking very

intellectually...says she can't understand what they're talking

about....things like that (she's had problems like this before). She

tries hard to fit in,but it's very hard for her.

She also can't let go of the past and constantly talks about how fun

it was when she and her friends were 9 & 10 and how they liked to

play hide and seek and things like that. She's kind of a kid in a

teenage body. At times, she does act mature, but then the next minute

she running around acting like she's 3 or 4 years younger.

Now it just seems like she's down all the time...if she isn't crying,

then she's constantly looking at herself in the mirror, always fixing

her hair, complaining that she can't do things right, and her self-

esteem is just really bad. I try hard to make her feel better by

telling her about the things she's good at (ie. cooking and piano),

but she never thinks she's good enough or pretty enough, etc, etc.

This goes WAY beyong regular teenage girl stuff. She does try

and " perk " herself up by cooking or playing outside with her 13 yo

sister or playing piano...but then she's back to feeling bad again.

Then....there's also a boy that she likes, but everytime she's around

him or his family (namely at church), she says she gets so nervous

that she feels physically sick and faint. I should also mention that

she's always been a very nervous, anxious child, and now, friends

and " crushes " have compounded those feelings. She just doesn't know

how to handle certain social situations.

Anyway, I know I must be rambling, but there are just so many

emotional things going on with her. I can tell right away when she's

down (her body language totally gives it away)and wants to

talk....but I'm to the point where I almost want to avoid her because

I know she's going to talk about the same thing....over and over and

over again. I feel like I'm such a bad mom.....wanting to avoid

her...but I feel like I'm going out of my mind. I did take her to the

doctors (he's very familiar with AS kids) and I'm looking into some

counseling for her,as well as a local AS group but I'm just feeling

so overwhelmed right now. Did I mention that I have a baby boy due in

1-1/2 weeks too...and I also have a toddler (23 mos), along with 2

other kids? I don't know if I can deal with anymore right now.

Well, thanks for listening to my long story. Do any of you have a

teenage girl who's dealing with similar things? I truly love and care

for her

(she is such a sweet girl), but I'm having a hard time with this. Any

advice would be appreciated.

Thank you and God bless,

le

[Guest guest]

I think you are doing the right thing putting her into counseling. Just make

sure that it's someone who knows AS. I also think it is great putting her in

a social group. My son has been seeing a counselor for the past two years. I

have to give her books on how to treat my son. It is not good. I told his

psychiatrist that I want him to start doing the therapy since he knows how

to help children with AS. I really think you are doing all that you can. It

is extremely hard but keep encouraging her. If your husband supports you

lean on him. You will need to lean on people you trust as well.

Believe me, you are doing a great job with all that you have to deal with.

Claudine

_____

From:

[mailto: ] On Behalf Of mama2392835

Sent: Sunday, February 04, 2007 10:02 PM

Subject: ( ) My re-intro and dd's possible depression(has

asperger's)...

Hi all,

I haven't been here for a long time, but I'm really in need of your

help.

My dd is almost 15 and was diagnosed with AS when she was 7 through

the school district. We homeschool now (have been for 5 years now).

We (me, my dh, and 3 other children) moved to Idaho from CA juast

back in Aug '06. I know kids who have AS have a difficult time with

change, but she didn't seem to have a problem with it so much until

early last month. She misses her old friends back in CA, as well as

family (we all do),but she has made some new friends here, but says

she feels out of place and different, compared to them. She complains

that her friends seem to act " too old " ---talking very

intellectually...says she can't understand what they're talking

about....things like that (she's had problems like this before). She

tries hard to fit in,but it's very hard for her.

She also can't let go of the past and constantly talks about how fun

it was when she and her friends were 9 & 10 and how they liked to

play hide and seek and things like that. She's kind of a kid in a

teenage body. At times, she does act mature, but then the next minute

she running around acting like she's 3 or 4 years younger.

Now it just seems like she's down all the time...if she isn't crying,

then she's constantly looking at herself in the mirror, always fixing

her hair, complaining that she can't do things right, and her self-

esteem is just really bad. I try hard to make her feel better by

telling her about the things she's good at (ie. cooking and piano),

but she never thinks she's good enough or pretty enough, etc, etc.

This goes WAY beyong regular teenage girl stuff. She does try

and " perk " herself up by cooking or playing outside with her 13 yo

sister or playing piano...but then she's back to feeling bad again.

Then....there's also a boy that she likes, but everytime she's around

him or his family (namely at church), she says she gets so nervous

that she feels physically sick and faint. I should also mention that

she's always been a very nervous, anxious child, and now, friends

and " crushes " have compounded those feelings. She just doesn't know

how to handle certain social situations.

Anyway, I know I must be rambling, but there are just so many

emotional things going on with her. I can tell right away when she's

down (her body language totally gives it away)and wants to

talk....but I'm to the point where I almost want to avoid her because

I know she's going to talk about the same thing....over and over and

over again. I feel like I'm such a bad mom.....wanting to avoid

her...but I feel like I'm going out of my mind. I did take her to the

doctors (he's very familiar with AS kids) and I'm looking into some

counseling for her,as well as a local AS group but I'm just feeling

so overwhelmed right now. Did I mention that I have a baby boy due in

1-1/2 weeks too...and I also have a toddler (23 mos), along with 2

other kids? I don't know if I can deal with anymore right now.

Well, thanks for listening to my long story. Do any of you have a

teenage girl who's dealing with similar things? I truly love and care

for her

(she is such a sweet girl), but I'm having a hard time with this. Any

advice would be appreciated.

Thank you and God bless,

le

[Guest guest]

le. of course I am no expert but it seems to me that her normal teenager

stuff is worse because of anxiety.........she sounds like she has anxiety.

Look up on ways to treat anxiety, let her look it all up and read about it, it

might help her to know about it?

sorry i'm not more help. They do have medicine for anxiety, don't know if that's

a possible route or not......

tanna

( ) My re-intro and dd's possible depression(has

asperger's)...

Hi all,

I haven't been here for a long time, but I'm really in need of your

help.

My dd is almost 15 and was diagnosed with AS when she was 7 through

the school district. We homeschool now (have been for 5 years now).

We (me, my dh, and 3 other children) moved to Idaho from CA juast

back in Aug '06. I know kids who have AS have a difficult time with

change, but she didn't seem to have a problem with it so much until

early last month. She misses her old friends back in CA, as well as

family (we all do),but she has made some new friends here, but says

she feels out of place and different, compared to them. She complains

that her friends seem to act " too old " ---talking very

intellectually...says she can't understand what they're talking

about....things like that (she's had problems like this before). She

tries hard to fit in,but it's very hard for her.

She also can't let go of the past and constantly talks about how fun

it was when she and her friends were 9 & 10 and how they liked to

play hide and seek and things like that. She's kind of a kid in a

teenage body. At times, she does act mature, but then the next minute

she running around acting like she's 3 or 4 years younger.

Now it just seems like she's down all the time...if she isn't crying,

then she's constantly looking at herself in the mirror, always fixing

her hair, complaining that she can't do things right, and her self-

esteem is just really bad. I try hard to make her feel better by

telling her about the things she's good at (ie. cooking and piano),

but she never thinks she's good enough or pretty enough, etc, etc.

This goes WAY beyong regular teenage girl stuff. She does try

and " perk " herself up by cooking or playing outside with her 13 yo

sister or playing piano...but then she's back to feeling bad again.

Then....there's also a boy that she likes, but everytime she's around

him or his family (namely at church), she says she gets so nervous

that she feels physically sick and faint. I should also mention that

she's always been a very nervous, anxious child, and now, friends

and " crushes " have compounded those feelings. She just doesn't know

how to handle certain social situations.

Anyway, I know I must be rambling, but there are just so many

emotional things going on with her. I can tell right away when she's

down (her body language totally gives it away)and wants to

talk....but I'm to the point where I almost want to avoid her because

I know she's going to talk about the same thing....over and over and

over again. I feel like I'm such a bad mom.....wanting to avoid

her...but I feel like I'm going out of my mind. I did take her to the

doctors (he's very familiar with AS kids) and I'm looking into some

counseling for her,as well as a local AS group but I'm just feeling

so overwhelmed right now. Did I mention that I have a baby boy due in

1-1/2 weeks too...and I also have a toddler (23 mos), along with 2

other kids? I don't know if I can deal with anymore right now.

Well, thanks for listening to my long story. Do any of you have a

teenage girl who's dealing with similar things? I truly love and care

for her

(she is such a sweet girl), but I'm having a hard time with this. Any

advice would be appreciated.

Thank you and God bless,

le