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Hi,,my name is Barbra and my son was just dianosed with

Aspergers, 2 weeks ago. Relief,,and fear,,both. OK,,BJ, short for

Joe, is just a few days from being 16. He has been in school

for 13 years, having started in special ed, when 3 for speech

development. For 13 years, I have been given the run around, by

educaters. The famous " he will grow out of this " being my

favorite. We live in South Dakota, and the law is, you can quit

school when 16. Two months ago, at the retesting for special ed,

BJ's IQ fianally kicked him out for special classes. Now, he will

be totally mainstreamed. When I ask,,he is flunking every single

class, what did they expect him to do?, they looked at me so

confused. Its like they had never seen one of his report card in

their life. So,,,at my roped end,and BJ's too, we said he would not

be back in school next year. (BJ has been programed to fail for 13

years, having never passed a class yet.) Hes 16, law says he can

quit. WOW, when you threaten to take away a schools money, do they

jump. Within a week, we were at a mental health unit, being tested

for everything, learning related.

The counclers that we are working with,,nice,,but do not sugar

coat anything!!! I am still trying to protect my baby,,and they are

very open about what BJs options are. Maybe I needed time to absorb

some stuff, but they believe being honest to the kid and the kid

will be honest with them. BJ is a non talker to strangers. Number

one,,just being with a strange person, was devastating, and then,

being told a word you have never heard of,,well,,I'm sure you

understand. Now, BJ sees a councler once a week at school, to deal

with issues he has about Aspergers, and to make sure hes doing ok

with that.

I have read for 2 weeks,,some possative,,some not, and just found

your group last night. As far as I can tell,,BJ is the ONLY Aspie

in South Dakota...lol..ok, I am sure he is not. BJ is a little boy

in a teenagers body. Hes 5 foot 7, and weights 135 pounds, and is

around 12, on a good day, 8 on a bad. He is quite, (shy?), sweet,

still hugs me, even in front of his classmates, is obedent to a

fault. Must have his watch on, and his Yu-ge-oh cards at all time.

He never leaves my side in town. To the point of hanging on to the

basket at the grocery store.

We have the same problems that all people have, divorced last

year, and a daughter leaving home at 18. I do not date, due to BJ's

just not ready for a stranger around, and I am just not ready

either.

Any advice, or comments, or help, or just say hi, would be

great!!! I know this is a long post, but,,,I just needed to vent,

thanks, barbra