Guest guest Posted February 27, 2007 Report Share Posted February 27, 2007 Not to be the black cloud or anything but I wouldn't move there for the world. I have two dx'd w/HFA at home and adding more is really stressful. BTDT, also have a family full of autistic-like people. Not a great thing to do that every single day! I would love to have that teacher though. Roxanna Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction >>> >>> > Dear Toni, >>> > >>> > I am somewhat of a harda** about meds, and I would be tempted to say >>> > something along the lines of " You can take your meds and stay in >>> this >>> > house, or you can not take your meds and go to the hospital where >>> > they can help you learn to control your rages without meds. Your >>> > choice. " And if he doesn't choose, he goes to the hospital. Toni, >>> I'm >>> > sorry you're having to go through all this. I think it's harder the >>> > older they get, because we as parents have less influence over them. >>> > Hang in there. >>> > >>> > Take care, >>> > Liz >>> > >>> > On Feb 11, 2007, at 12:09 PM, Toni wrote: >>> > >>> >> >>> >> I told them to leave my room and they don't LISTEN. I feel like a >>> >> prisoner >>> >> in my own home. My boys are 18 and when I told them to get out they >>> >> refused >>> >> and I had to try and protect the one cornered( Noah) who was >>> >> taunting the >>> >> one( n) that had in him the corner with a big knife held up >>> >> in the >>> >> air. I was scared we were going to have an accident and Noah >>> >> wouldn't just >>> >> SHUT UP so n would calm down. Of course dh was out of town. >>> >> n >>> >> finally went and put the knife up and 10 minutes later he was up in >>> >> my room >>> >> acting like nothing happened and saying I love you. God forgive me, >>> >> I didn't >>> >> even feel like saying I love you back after that. They both didn't >>> >> go to >>> >> school all week and n said his meds were f'ing his head up >>> but I >>> >> pointed out that he had been taking it when he was going to school >>> >> and he >>> >> didn't have meltdowns like that. Yeah, but I quit taking them >>> >> because they >>> >> are f'ing with my head. I can't reason with him about the meds. I'm >>> >> TIRED >>> >> and sick of feeling like a prisoner walking on egg shells and >>> >> hiding in my >>> >> room to prevent meltdowns. the convicts are running the prison.... >>> >> ----- Original Message ----- >>> >> >>> > >>> > >>> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2007 Report Share Posted February 28, 2007 I would just like to be surrounded by people that UNDERSTAND and don't make judgments i.e.: I'd beat his a** if he said that to me, I'd kick him out if he did that.. etc..Where am I going to kick him out to? I would just like to have a school that CARES. My son hasn't been to school in 3 weeks and we have not heard a word from them. They are GLAD to be rid of him... Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction > >>> > >>> > Dear Toni, > >>> > > >>> > I am somewhat of a harda** about meds, and I would be tempted to > say > >>> > something along the lines of " You can take your meds and stay in > >>> this > >>> > house, or you can not take your meds and go to the hospital where > >>> > they can help you learn to control your rages without meds. Your > >>> > choice. " And if he doesn't choose, he goes to the hospital. Toni, > >>> I'm > >>> > sorry you're having to go through all this. I think it's harder the > >>> > older they get, because we as parents have less influence over > them. > >>> > Hang in there. > >>> > > >>> > Take care, > >>> > Liz > >>> > > >>> > On Feb 11, 2007, at 12:09 PM, Toni wrote: > >>> > > >>> >> > >>> >> I told them to leave my room and they don't LISTEN. I feel like a > >>> >> prisoner > >>> >> in my own home. My boys are 18 and when I told them to get out > they > >>> >> refused > >>> >> and I had to try and protect the one cornered( Noah) who was > >>> >> taunting the > >>> >> one( n) that had in him the corner with a big knife held up > >>> >> in the > >>> >> air. I was scared we were going to have an accident and Noah > >>> >> wouldn't just > >>> >> SHUT UP so n would calm down. Of course dh was out of town. > >>> >> n > >>> >> finally went and put the knife up and 10 minutes later he was up > in > >>> >> my room > >>> >> acting like nothing happened and saying I love you. God forgive > me, > >>> >> I didn't > >>> >> even feel like saying I love you back after that. They both didn't > >>> >> go to > >>> >> school all week and n said his meds were f'ing his head up > >>> but I > >>> >> pointed out that he had been taking it when he was going to school > >>> >> and he > >>> >> didn't have meltdowns like that. Yeah, but I quit taking them > >>> >> because they > >>> >> are f'ing with my head. I can't reason with him about the meds. > I'm > >>> >> TIRED > >>> >> and sick of feeling like a prisoner walking on egg shells and > >>> >> hiding in my > >>> >> room to prevent meltdowns. the convicts are running the prison.... > >>> >> ----- Original Message ----- > >>> >> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2007 Report Share Posted February 28, 2007 Hi Toni, That's just awful. We went through something similar last year. just couldn't cope with school any more. The kids weren't very nice, he was bored with everything they were studying, what was the point, anyhow? They didn't care much at his school, either, and our family had quite a history with that school. (Our daughter went there, too, back when there were kids swinging from the chandeliers and cursing every chance they got.) I eventually went to 's case manager, who had a fit that he'd been out of school so long, and we figured out a way for him to finish out the year from home. I'm sorry you're all having to go through this. I want to tell you something, though. Even though had this AWFUL last semester of high school and this kind of rough first semester in college, he is doing really well academically this semester. He's absolutely shining. I wish we could do something about the social side of things, but we'll work on it with the life coach in time. How are you surviving dh's absence? Liz On Feb 28, 2007, at 12:47 PM, Toni wrote: > I would just like to be surrounded by people that UNDERSTAND and > don't make > judgments i.e.: I'd beat his a** if he said that to me, I'd kick > him out if > he did that.. etc..Where am I going to kick him out to? > I would just like to have a school that CARES. My son hasn't been to > school in 3 weeks and we have not heard a word from them. They are > GLAD to > be rid of him... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 1, 2007 Report Share Posted March 1, 2007 Hello Liz, Thanks for the encouragement. I'm kind of relieved (if you know what I mean) that he has made a decision one way or the other. It was the morning fights and not knowing if he would go or not that day that was so hard on me.DH and I had tried to talk him into getting his GED after he failed last year because of absences and not making up homework, but at least now I KNOW he's not going . That's wonderful that is doing well. What is he taking? Does he know what he wants to " do " yet? I hope he continues to do well and that the social part will get worked out soon too. I have heard that college is easier for people with aspergers than high school. Right now things are pretty smooth around here since n has quit school. We all three have an appt with the pdoc today and they both said they weren't going. I'll do my best to get them there and go for myself if they won't go and that's all I can do. Haven't had any major meltdowns (yet) n told me just now that he doesn't need to go to the dr. because he has quit taking his medicine since he isn't going to school. OH BOY! Things are bound to get fun real soon... At least he said he looked up some info on the GED so he's at least thinking about it... Toni Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction > Hi Toni, > > That's just awful. We went through something similar last year. > just couldn't cope with school any more. The kids weren't very > nice, he was bored with everything they were studying, what was the > point, anyhow? They didn't care much at his school, either, and our > family had quite a history with that school. (Our daughter went > there, too, back when there were kids swinging from the chandeliers > and cursing every chance they got.) I eventually went to 's > case manager, who had a fit that he'd been out of school so long, and > we figured out a way for him to finish out the year from home. > > I'm sorry you're all having to go through this. I want to tell you > something, though. Even though had this AWFUL last semester > of high school and this kind of rough first semester in college, he > is doing really well academically this semester. He's absolutely > shining. I wish we could do something about the social side of > things, but we'll work on it with the life coach in time. > > How are you surviving dh's absence? > > Liz > > On Feb 28, 2007, at 12:47 PM, Toni wrote: > >> I would just like to be surrounded by people that UNDERSTAND and >> don't make >> judgments i.e.: I'd beat his a** if he said that to me, I'd kick >> him out if >> he did that.. etc..Where am I going to kick him out to? >> I would just like to have a school that CARES. My son hasn't been to >> school in 3 weeks and we have not heard a word from them. They are >> GLAD to >> be rid of him... > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 1, 2007 Report Share Posted March 1, 2007 OH YESSSS The PERFECT Parent syndrome!!! How many friggin perfect parents I have met since my son was diagnosed!!! THEY HAVE THE CURE FOR EVERYTHING!! NOT!!! LOL HUGGS for awesome autism gear look HERE! http://www.cafepress.com/autismawarenes For Fun Fashion gear look HERE! http://www.cafepress.com/stronggear For Fun Animal Activist Gear go HERE! http://www.cafepress.com/vegetarianrus and don't forget Ribbons of hope! Show your support and show your ribbon. http://www.cafepress.com/ribbonsofhope -- Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction I would just like to be surrounded by people that UNDERSTAND and don't make judgments i.e.: I'd beat his a** if he said that to me, I'd kick him out if he did that.. etc..Where am I going to kick him out to? I would just like to have a school that CARES. My son hasn't been to school in 3 weeks and we have not heard a word from them. They are GLAD to be rid of him... Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction > >>> > >>> > Dear Toni, > >>> > > >>> > I am somewhat of a harda** about meds, and I would be tempted to > say > >>> > something along the lines of " You can take your meds and stay in > >>> this > >>> > house, or you can not take your meds and go to the hospital where > >>> > they can help you learn to control your rages without meds. Your > >>> > choice. " And if he doesn't choose, he goes to the hospital. Toni, > >>> I'm > >>> > sorry you're having to go through all this. I think it's harder the > >>> > older they get, because we as parents have less influence over > them. > >>> > Hang in there. > >>> > > >>> > Take care, > >>> > Liz > >>> > > >>> > On Feb 11, 2007, at 12:09 PM, Toni wrote: > >>> > > >>> >> > >>> >> I told them to leave my room and they don't LISTEN. I feel like a > >>> >> prisoner > >>> >> in my own home. My boys are 18 and when I told them to get out > they > >>> >> refused > >>> >> and I had to try and protect the one cornered( Noah) who was > >>> >> taunting the > >>> >> one( n) that had in him the corner with a big knife held up > >>> >> in the > >>> >> air. I was scared we were going to have an accident and Noah > >>> >> wouldn't just > >>> >> SHUT UP so n would calm down. Of course dh was out of town. > >>> >> n > >>> >> finally went and put the knife up and 10 minutes later he was up > in > >>> >> my room > >>> >> acting like nothing happened and saying I love you. God forgive > me, > >>> >> I didn't > >>> >> even feel like saying I love you back after that. They both didn't > >>> >> go to > >>> >> school all week and n said his meds were f'ing his head up > >>> but I > >>> >> pointed out that he had been taking it when he was going to school > >>> >> and he > >>> >> didn't have meltdowns like that. Yeah, but I quit taking them > >>> >> because they > >>> >> are f'ing with my head. I can't reason with him about the meds. > I'm > >>> >> TIRED > >>> >> and sick of feeling like a prisoner walking on egg shells and > >>> >> hiding in my > >>> >> room to prevent meltdowns. the convicts are running the prison.... > >>> >> ----- Original Message ----- > >>> >> > >>> > > >>> > > >>> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 1, 2007 Report Share Posted March 1, 2007 Hi Toni Hope all is going well for you...how has the school issues gone? - C. Mom to Cassie 15 PCOS, Austin 13 ADHD and a 3 HFA/AS & SPD/SID Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction > >> > >> > Dear Toni, > >> > > >> > I am somewhat of a harda** about meds, and I would be tempted to say > >> > something along the lines of " You can take your meds and stay in > >> this > >> > house, or you can not take your meds and go to the hospital where > >> > they can help you learn to control your rages without meds. Your > >> > choice. " And if he doesn't choose, he goes to the hospital. Toni, > >> I'm > >> > sorry you're having to go through all this. I think it's harder the > >> > older they get, because we as parents have less influence over them. > >> > Hang in there. > >> > > >> > Take care, > >> > Liz > >> > > >> > On Feb 11, 2007, at 12:09 PM, Toni wrote: > >> > > >> >> > >> >> I told them to leave my room and they don't LISTEN. I feel like a > >> >> prisoner > >> >> in my own home. My boys are 18 and when I told them to get out they > >> >> refused > >> >> and I had to try and protect the one cornered( Noah) who was > >> >> taunting the > >> >> one( n) that had in him the corner with a big knife held up > >> >> in the > >> >> air. I was scared we were going to have an accident and Noah > >> >> wouldn't just > >> >> SHUT UP so n would calm down. Of course dh was out of town. > >> >> n > >> >> finally went and put the knife up and 10 minutes later he was up in > >> >> my room > >> >> acting like nothing happened and saying I love you. God forgive me, > >> >> I didn't > >> >> even feel like saying I love you back after that. They both didn't > >> >> go to > >> >> school all week and n said his meds were f'ing his head up > >> but I > >> >> pointed out that he had been taking it when he was going to school > >> >> and he > >> >> didn't have meltdowns like that. Yeah, but I quit taking them > >> >> because they > >> >> are f'ing with my head. I can't reason with him about the meds. I'm > >> >> TIRED > >> >> and sick of feeling like a prisoner walking on egg shells and > >> >> hiding in my > >> >> room to prevent meltdowns. the convicts are running the prison.... > >> >> ----- Original Message ----- > >> >> > >> > > >> > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2007 Report Share Posted March 2, 2007 C :Well... Noah went three days this week and missed two.He promises he is going to stick it out, we'll see. It is so hard for him to go when n is still here. We officially withdrew n from school yesterday and they are actually going to let us out of our contract. Aren't they special? n has not been on meds this week and had a meltdown last night in my room again. The electricity went out and they both came in my room and Noah was shining the flashlight in his face and wouldn't quit. ( did I mention they are 18? ) I did have my recorder handy so dh could hear how nicely they talk to me. Somehow it was MY fault that Noah wouldn't quit aggravating Bren. This am n has been helpful and has promised to help me pack the car this afternoon. I am getting OUT of dodge and going to visit my aunt and cousin in Al for the weekend! They can't stand when I leave them, poor babies...And ask who's going to take care of us this weekend. I told them you need to learn to take care of yourself, I won't be here forever .. Hope you have a GREAT relaxing weekend and everyone else does too! Toni Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction > > >> > > >> > Dear Toni, > > >> > > > >> > I am somewhat of a harda** about meds, and I would be tempted to > say > > >> > something along the lines of " You can take your meds and stay in > > >> this > > >> > house, or you can not take your meds and go to the hospital where > > >> > they can help you learn to control your rages without meds. Your > > >> > choice. " And if he doesn't choose, he goes to the hospital. Toni, > > >> I'm > > >> > sorry you're having to go through all this. I think it's harder > the > > >> > older they get, because we as parents have less influence over > them. > > >> > Hang in there. > > >> > > > >> > Take care, > > >> > Liz > > >> > > > >> > On Feb 11, 2007, at 12:09 PM, Toni wrote: > > >> > > > >> >> > > >> >> I told them to leave my room and they don't LISTEN. I feel like a > > >> >> prisoner > > >> >> in my own home. My boys are 18 and when I told them to get out > they > > >> >> refused > > >> >> and I had to try and protect the one cornered( Noah) who was > > >> >> taunting the > > >> >> one( n) that had in him the corner with a big knife held up > > >> >> in the > > >> >> air. I was scared we were going to have an accident and Noah > > >> >> wouldn't just > > >> >> SHUT UP so n would calm down. Of course dh was out of town. > > >> >> n > > >> >> finally went and put the knife up and 10 minutes later he was up > in > > >> >> my room > > >> >> acting like nothing happened and saying I love you. God forgive > me, > > >> >> I didn't > > >> >> even feel like saying I love you back after that. They both > didn't > > >> >> go to > > >> >> school all week and n said his meds were f'ing his head up > > >> but I > > >> >> pointed out that he had been taking it when he was going to > school > > >> >> and he > > >> >> didn't have meltdowns like that. Yeah, but I quit taking them > > >> >> because they > > >> >> are f'ing with my head. I can't reason with him about the meds. > I'm > > >> >> TIRED > > >> >> and sick of feeling like a prisoner walking on egg shells and > > >> >> hiding in my > > >> >> room to prevent meltdowns. the convicts are running the > prison.... > > >> >> ----- Original Message ----- > > >> >> > > >> > > > >> > > > >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2007 Report Share Posted March 2, 2007 Toni, Sounds like there has been a tiny baby step forward by n. And you got a tape of the regression. That's good. Put it somewhere safe. LOL I hope you have a relaxing time in Alabama. Liz On Mar 2, 2007, at 8:50 AM, Toni wrote: > > C :Well... Noah went three days this week and missed two.He > promises > he is going to stick it out, we'll see. It is so hard for him to go > when > n is still here. We officially withdrew n from school > yesterday > and they are actually going to let us out of our contract. Aren't they > special? n has not been on meds this week and had a meltdown > last > night in my room again. The electricity went out and they both came > in my > room and Noah was shining the flashlight in his face and wouldn't > quit. ( > did I mention they are 18? ) I did have my recorder handy so dh > could hear > how nicely they talk to me. Somehow it was MY fault that Noah > wouldn't > quit aggravating Bren. This am n has been helpful and has > promised to > help me pack the car this afternoon. I am getting OUT of dodge and > going to > visit my aunt and cousin in Al for the weekend! They can't stand > when I > leave them, poor babies...And ask who's going to take care of us this > weekend. I told them you need to learn to take care of yourself, I > won't be > here forever .. Hope you have a GREAT relaxing weekend and everyone > else > does too! Toni Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2007 Report Share Posted March 2, 2007 Thanks Liz, I plan on relaxing . I'm taking the tape recorder with me so nothing happens to it...WOW I saw on your other post how much a life coach costs... Toni Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction > Toni, > Sounds like there has been a tiny baby step forward by n. And > you got a tape of the regression. That's good. Put it somewhere safe. > LOL I hope you have a relaxing time in Alabama. > > Liz > > On Mar 2, 2007, at 8:50 AM, Toni wrote: > >> >> C :Well... Noah went three days this week and missed two.He >> promises >> he is going to stick it out, we'll see. It is so hard for him to go >> when >> n is still here. We officially withdrew n from school >> yesterday >> and they are actually going to let us out of our contract. Aren't they >> special? n has not been on meds this week and had a meltdown >> last >> night in my room again. The electricity went out and they both came >> in my >> room and Noah was shining the flashlight in his face and wouldn't >> quit. ( >> did I mention they are 18? ) I did have my recorder handy so dh >> could hear >> how nicely they talk to me. Somehow it was MY fault that Noah >> wouldn't >> quit aggravating Bren. This am n has been helpful and has >> promised to >> help me pack the car this afternoon. I am getting OUT of dodge and >> going to >> visit my aunt and cousin in Al for the weekend! They can't stand >> when I >> leave them, poor babies...And ask who's going to take care of us this >> weekend. I told them you need to learn to take care of yourself, I >> won't be >> here forever .. Hope you have a GREAT relaxing weekend and everyone >> else >> does too! Toni > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 2, 2007 Report Share Posted March 2, 2007 Toni, I was thinking the same thing about the cost of a life coach! I used to be a teacher but think I'll look into life coaching as a career when my boys are older! I could only work 2 hours a day and make the same amount of money! Why why why do services have to cost so much for our kids????? Liz from Houston Toni <kbtoni@...> wrote: Thanks Liz, I plan on relaxing . I'm taking the tape recorder with me so nothing happens to it...WOW I saw on your other post how much a life coach costs... Toni Re: ( ) Newbie Introduction > Toni, > Sounds like there has been a tiny baby step forward by n. And > you got a tape of the regression. That's good. Put it somewhere safe. > LOL I hope you have a relaxing time in Alabama. > > Liz > > On Mar 2, 2007, at 8:50 AM, Toni wrote: > >> >> C :Well... Noah went three days this week and missed two.He >> promises >> he is going to stick it out, we'll see. It is so hard for him to go >> when >> n is still here. We officially withdrew n from school >> yesterday >> and they are actually going to let us out of our contract. Aren't they >> special? n has not been on meds this week and had a meltdown >> last >> night in my room again. The electricity went out and they both came >> in my >> room and Noah was shining the flashlight in his face and wouldn't >> quit. ( >> did I mention they are 18? ) I did have my recorder handy so dh >> could hear >> how nicely they talk to me. Somehow it was MY fault that Noah >> wouldn't >> quit aggravating Bren. This am n has been helpful and has >> promised to >> help me pack the car this afternoon. I am getting OUT of dodge and >> going to >> visit my aunt and cousin in Al for the weekend! They can't stand >> when I >> leave them, poor babies...And ask who's going to take care of us this >> weekend. I told them you need to learn to take care of yourself, I >> won't be >> here forever .. Hope you have a GREAT relaxing weekend and everyone >> else >> does too! Toni > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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