Re: My son is being bullied on the school bus

[Guest guest]

This is such a common occurrence with children on the spectrum. Often time

those who don't understand the disability, as the receptionist, tell parents

to deal with it. This is not the case with children with IEP's and special

needs. As part of your child's school day it encompasses the travel to and

from school this means that the school is responsible for his safety and to be

free of harassment. This is not bullying but harassment because your child

does not understand how to defend himself as a typical child would therefore

refer to it as such, harassment.

I would immediately write a letter to the principal and demand an IEP team

meeting to address this issue and how THE SCHOOL will solve this matter and

discipline those child who harassed your child. The discipline can be as

simple as removing their recess. There is no need to call for the blood of

these

children. They are just doing what " normal " children do however the key

component here is that your child has a social disability that does not allow

him

to respond as a " typical " child would in a similar circumstance. The bus

driver must be informed and present at the meeting that is why it is something

that must be done thru the IEP process so that your child has his procedural

safeguards in effect. Once a plan is in effect then it must be revisited

often in order to ensure that the plan continues to be effective. I cannot

emphasize enough to place the situation in writing. This starts the writing

trail and in addition places the principal on notice and therefore he is

legally

responsible and should something severe happen to your son, God forbid, the

principal is no longer protected under the safety net of the school and can be

held personally responsible in a civil motion. The letter is referred to as

a Gebser letter. The principal is more than likely not aware of this

situation of the Gebser letter but should he refuse to personally follow thru

you

may just want to mention that a group of on line parents mentioned Gebser

letter and that he/she should look into the matter of personal liability.

Good luck.

Connie Ajay

[Guest guest]

holy smokes! I would march right up there and demand something to be done!

No way would I take that, no way! I am so mad..right with you. LET ME

AT " EM!!!!!!

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[Guest guest]

Maybe it's time to teach THEM about bullying and it's incongruence

with a FAPE.

Jackie

On Dec 11, 2006, at 9:32 PM, iamtiffiney wrote:

> So I said i wanted an

> appointment with the principal and the boys parents. I was told they

> arent allowed to make confrences between parents and that I should

> teach my son that old saying 'sticks and stones may break my bones

> but words will never hurt me' .

>

[Guest guest]

Is your son not on a Special Ed bus? That is unacceptable! You are

NOT over reacting one little bit. That is horrible! You might get an

offer from the transportation Dept...to have camera's put on the bus.

They are responsible for the saftey of you child. You do not have to

change any bit of you sons ROUTINE because of bullies. Make them

change! The students can be written up and expelled from the bus.

I had trouble with a Special ED bus driver...omg she was horrible

with my son. I was able to get him on another bus.

Children should not bully any child especially a child with a

disabilty. Be VERY firm with them. If they can not provide a safe

enviroment for you son on that bus...it is THEIR responsibility to

make changes and assure his saftey.

Sticks and stones...yea right!

Best Wishes,

linda

>

> My son is 5 and rides the school bus home with my 7 year old and 10

> year old. Today he came home in tears and couldnt even talk he was

so

> upset. I asked my daughter what happened and she said two boys were

> calling him an idiot,stupid and a baby. I was furious and called

the

> school right away.The recieptionist informed me I needed to call

> transportation, but when I have called in the past (conceringin my

> older two children) nothing was resolved. So I said i wanted an

> appointment with the principal and the boys parents. I was told

they

> arent allowed to make confrences between parents and that I should

> teach my son that old saying 'sticks and stones may break my bones

> but words will never hurt me' . Explaining something like that to a

> normal 5 year old is challenging enough my my 5 year old is an

aspie

> so explaining anything is a difficult task. The recieptionist said

> shed have the councelor call me tomorrow and possibly have the

> principal call me today(no one called today).She also suggested

> switching my son from afternoon kindergarten to morning so he

wouldnt

> be on the bus with these kids. Though I dont see how taking my

child

> out of his class and giving him a new one with new kids will make

his

> life easier. Any suggestions ? other then the obvious which is not

> allow my children to ride the bus. I mean do we really live in a

> society where picking on 'special needs' kids is that accecpted and

> tolerated?I really got the impression she thought I was over

> reacting.And maybe I am. Had it been one of my older childern who

are

> NT I probably would have told them to ignore it and or talk to the

> bus driver.But as we all know Aspie kids dont understand things the

> same way and hes really upset.Cried himself to sleep saying 'I dont

> want to be an idiot' . No clue why these kids say this to him and

no

> clue what if anything I can do about it.

>

[Guest guest]

my son rides the regular bus with his older siblings and hasnt had a problem

until reciently

ladyabyrose <luvkljm@...> wrote: Is your son not on a Special Ed

bus? That is unacceptable! You are

NOT over reacting one little bit. That is horrible! You might get an

offer from the transportation Dept...to have camera's put on the bus.

They are responsible for the saftey of you child. You do not have to

change any bit of you sons ROUTINE because of bullies. Make them

change! The students can be written up and expelled from the bus.

I had trouble with a Special ED bus driver...omg she was horrible

with my son. I was able to get him on another bus.

Children should not bully any child especially a child with a

disabilty. Be VERY firm with them. If they can not provide a safe

enviroment for you son on that bus...it is THEIR responsibility to

make changes and assure his saftey.

Sticks and stones...yea right!

Best Wishes,

linda

>

> My son is 5 and rides the school bus home with my 7 year old and 10

> year old. Today he came home in tears and couldnt even talk he was

so

> upset. I asked my daughter what happened and she said two boys were

> calling him an idiot,stupid and a baby. I was furious and called

the

> school right away.The recieptionist informed me I needed to call

> transportation, but when I have called in the past (conceringin my

> older two children) nothing was resolved. So I said i wanted an

> appointment with the principal and the boys parents. I was told

they

> arent allowed to make confrences between parents and that I should

> teach my son that old saying 'sticks and stones may break my bones

> but words will never hurt me' . Explaining something like that to a

> normal 5 year old is challenging enough my my 5 year old is an

aspie

> so explaining anything is a difficult task. The recieptionist said

> shed have the councelor call me tomorrow and possibly have the

> principal call me today(no one called today).She also suggested

> switching my son from afternoon kindergarten to morning so he

wouldnt

> be on the bus with these kids. Though I dont see how taking my

child

> out of his class and giving him a new one with new kids will make

his

> life easier. Any suggestions ? other then the obvious which is not

> allow my children to ride the bus. I mean do we really live in a

> society where picking on 'special needs' kids is that accecpted and

> tolerated?I really got the impression she thought I was over

> reacting.And maybe I am. Had it been one of my older childern who

are

> NT I probably would have told them to ignore it and or talk to the

> bus driver.But as we all know Aspie kids dont understand things the

> same way and hes really upset.Cried himself to sleep saying 'I dont

> want to be an idiot' . No clue why these kids say this to him and

no

> clue what if anything I can do about it.

>

Smiles and Sunshine,

Tiffiney

---------------------------------

Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.

[Guest guest]

AWSOME advice I will do it in the morningThank you so much!!

Belt3@... wrote: This is such a common occurrence with children on

the spectrum. Often time

those who don't understand the disability, as the receptionist, tell parents

to deal with it. This is not the case with children with IEP's and special

needs. As part of your child's school day it encompasses the travel to and

from school this means that the school is responsible for his safety and to be

free of harassment. This is not bullying but harassment because your child

does not understand how to defend himself as a typical child would therefore

refer to it as such, harassment.

I would immediately write a letter to the principal and demand an IEP team

meeting to address this issue and how THE SCHOOL will solve this matter and

discipline those child who harassed your child. The discipline can be as

simple as removing their recess. There is no need to call for the blood of these

children. They are just doing what " normal " children do however the key

component here is that your child has a social disability that does not allow

him

to respond as a " typical " child would in a similar circumstance. The bus

driver must be informed and present at the meeting that is why it is something

that must be done thru the IEP process so that your child has his procedural

safeguards in effect. Once a plan is in effect then it must be revisited

often in order to ensure that the plan continues to be effective. I cannot

emphasize enough to place the situation in writing. This starts the writing

trail and in addition places the principal on notice and therefore he is legally

responsible and should something severe happen to your son, God forbid, the

principal is no longer protected under the safety net of the school and can be

held personally responsible in a civil motion. The letter is referred to as

a Gebser letter. The principal is more than likely not aware of this

situation of the Gebser letter but should he refuse to personally follow thru

you

may just want to mention that a group of on line parents mentioned Gebser

letter and that he/she should look into the matter of personal liability.

Good luck.

Connie Ajay

[Guest guest]

My son also had problems on the bus. He was picked on by some bullies. But

it was more complicated in that he really could not handle the noise,

activity, and other sensory overload issues after being in school all day long.

I

did talk to the bus driver and she allowed him to sit closer to her, but this

wasn't the issue. I have picked him up for school and he is much happier and

more relaxed. On some bad days, he would wait to walk out after the other

kids had left the school to avoid the chaos in the halls.

Just a thought,

Farrelly

[Guest guest]

Regardless. Whether there is an IEP in place or not, the officials of the

school, from the school superintendant up to the Director of the Board of

Education down to the child's teacher are responsible and liable for injury.

Should there be litigation, each and every one should be listed individually as

defendants and written into the body of the complaint " ... here after referred

to as Doe, Principal, et al. "

I would like to know more about IEPs. How they are put together, how they are

put into force, how is eligibility is established, qualifications, etc.

Dave

Re: ( ) My son is being bullied on the school bus

AWSOME advice I will do it in the morningThank you so much!!

Belt3@... wrote: This is such a common occurrence with children on

the spectrum. Often time

those who don't understand the disability, as the receptionist, tell parents

to deal with it. This is not the case with children with IEP's and special

needs. As part of your child's school day it encompasses the travel to and

from school this means that the school is responsible for his safety and to be

free of harassment. This is not bullying but harassment because your child

does not understand how to defend himself as a typical child would therefore

refer to it as such, harassment.

I would immediately write a letter to the principal and demand an IEP team

meeting to address this issue and how THE SCHOOL will solve this matter and

discipline those child who harassed your child. The discipline can be as

simple as removing their recess. There is no need to call for the blood of these

children. They are just doing what " normal " children do however the key

component here is that your child has a social disability that does not allow

him

to respond as a " typical " child would in a similar circumstance. The bus

driver must be informed and present at the meeting that is why it is something

that must be done thru the IEP process so that your child has his procedural

safeguards in effect. Once a plan is in effect then it must be revisited

often in order to ensure that the plan continues to be effective. I cannot

emphasize enough to place the situation in writing. This starts the writing

trail and in addition places the principal on notice and therefore he is legally

responsible and should something severe happen to your son, God forbid, the

principal is no longer protected under the safety net of the school and can be

held personally responsible in a civil motion. The letter is referred to as

a Gebser letter. The principal is more than likely not aware of this

situation of the Gebser letter but should he refuse to personally follow thru

you

may just want to mention that a group of on line parents mentioned Gebser

letter and that he/she should look into the matter of personal liability.

Good luck.

Connie Ajay

[Guest guest]

This is a very good article about bullying and harrassment. Bottom line is

that severe harrassment of a child in any of these environments (classroom,

hallway, playground, athletic field or on a school bus) can be a violation of

civil rights. Pam

_http://stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/HHS_PSA/pdfs/SBN_Tip_24.pdf_

(http://stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/HHS_PSA/pdfs/SBN_Tip_24.pdf)

[Guest guest]

Hello,

I didn't even finish reading this because I stopped at what the principal

said: for you to explain to your child that old saying: sticks & stones will

break my bones " but names will never hurt me " ? Has that principal ever heard of

MENTAL ABUSE!!!!.? I hope you find fliers from domestic violence that

explains what mental abuse is. (name calling is one).... I Hope you explain to

your child that it was wrong for them to call you names, and I know it did hurt

your feelings. Give him a big hug from me. And go back to the principal and go

get him!!! I'm going to finish reading your post. Good luck.

iamtiffiney <iamtiffiney@...> wrote:

My son is 5 and rides the school bus home with my 7 year old and 10

year old. Today he came home in tears and couldnt even talk he was so

upset. I asked my daughter what happened and she said two boys were

calling him an idiot,stupid and a baby. I was furious and called the

school right away.The recieptionist informed me I needed to call

transportation, but when I have called in the past (conceringin my

older two children) nothing was resolved. So I said i wanted an

appointment with the principal and the boys parents. I was told they

arent allowed to make confrences between parents and that I should

teach my son that old saying 'sticks and stones may break my bones

but words will never hurt me' . Explaining something like that to a

normal 5 year old is challenging enough my my 5 year old is an aspie

so explaining anything is a difficult task. The recieptionist said

shed have the councelor call me tomorrow and possibly have the

principal call me today(no one called today).She also suggested

switching my son from afternoon kindergarten to morning so he wouldnt

be on the bus with these kids. Though I dont see how taking my child

out of his class and giving him a new one with new kids will make his

life easier. Any suggestions ? other then the obvious which is not

allow my children to ride the bus. I mean do we really live in a

society where picking on 'special needs' kids is that accecpted and

tolerated?I really got the impression she thought I was over

reacting.And maybe I am. Had it been one of my older childern who are

NT I probably would have told them to ignore it and or talk to the

bus driver.But as we all know Aspie kids dont understand things the

same way and hes really upset.Cried himself to sleep saying 'I dont

want to be an idiot' . No clue why these kids say this to him and no

clue what if anything I can do about it.

---------------------------------

Everyone is raving about the all-new beta.

[Guest guest]

You should never have to tolerate being called names in order to get a free and

appropriate public education. I don't know why it becomes the " victims "

responsibility to resolve the problem when the problem is really the bullies.

They should be taken care of. I wouldn't change my kid's class around just to

accommodate some bullies on the bus. They should be in trouble for teasing

another kid, whether the kid is sped or not. Get an appt to see the principal

asap and tell him/her that you expect a resolution to this. When we have called

the principal, we have usually gotten a good response and action taken. If

other people think it is " over reacting " then ignore them. They are people who

usually have those kids who never have these problems so they have no idea what

it's like.

On another note, this doesn't mean you can't or shouldn't request that your

child get social skills help and in particular, help learning how to handle

bullies. It doesn't mean they get good at it, but sometimes it can help give

them more confidence in handling these things.

Roxanna

( ) My son is being bullied on the school bus

My son is 5 and rides the school bus home with my 7 year old and 10

year old. Today he came home in tears and couldnt even talk he was so

upset. I asked my daughter what happened and she said two boys were

calling him an idiot,stupid and a baby. I was furious and called the

school right away.The recieptionist informed me I needed to call

transportation, but when I have called in the past (conceringin my

older two children) nothing was resolved. So I said i wanted an

appointment with the principal and the boys parents. I was told they

arent allowed to make confrences between parents and that I should

teach my son that old saying 'sticks and stones may break my bones

but words will never hurt me' . Explaining something like that to a

normal 5 year old is challenging enough my my 5 year old is an aspie

so explaining anything is a difficult task. The recieptionist said

shed have the councelor call me tomorrow and possibly have the

principal call me today(no one called today).She also suggested

switching my son from afternoon kindergarten to morning so he wouldnt

be on the bus with these kids. Though I dont see how taking my child

out of his class and giving him a new one with new kids will make his

life easier. Any suggestions ? other then the obvious which is not

allow my children to ride the bus. I mean do we really live in a

society where picking on 'special needs' kids is that accecpted and

tolerated?I really got the impression she thought I was over

reacting.And maybe I am. Had it been one of my older childern who are

NT I probably would have told them to ignore it and or talk to the

bus driver.But as we all know Aspie kids dont understand things the

same way and hes really upset.Cried himself to sleep saying 'I dont

want to be an idiot' . No clue why these kids say this to him and no

clue what if anything I can do about it.

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