Re: Re:Autism Cure, huh?

[Guest guest]

would we be able to see her show here?

Mark son <thejacobsons@...> wrote: THere is going to be

a show about her on the t.v in Australia next Tuesday on the SBS at 7.30 if

anyone is interested.

Re: ( ) Re:Autism Cure, huh?

> Are you talking about the autistic woman who invented the queeze machine?

> It's like a device cattle go through in some way, but she found it helped

> calm her autism symptoms some.

>

> Jo <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote: I dont think any

> of claimed to celebrate autism or view it as a gift.

> if i had a choice (which I dont) I would elect for alex to be NT. I

> dont enjoy seeing him struggle or have to learn things that NT kids

> get naturally. I wont speak for the rest, but my point is that

> is what he is. I know i have no control over a cure. i control how i

> parent him. I control his education and the influances he gains from

> educators and other people in his life. I control weather or not i

> sit and do nothing or educate others in my life about autism. I

> refuse to let alex be defined by autism. I refuse to contribute to

> ignorance with silence, and i refuse to morn who alex could have been

> and choose to celebrate who he IS. I will not agree that autism is a

> curse for my child. Parents of more profoundly autistic children have

> the right to feel bitter about a child they see as lost.. i feel for

> those families. but i dont generalize. I speak for my family from my

> experiences. My isnt lost he isnt cursed. nothing is easy, but

> things worth having usually arent. Every accomplishment adds

> character and strength as much as a newley learned ability. Has

> anyone heard of that lady (robert knows her name) who was born

> proundly autistic..now she's an author, college professor and designs

> slaughterhouses all over the world for the humane slaughter of cows

> and pigs..its because of her autism and how it caused her to think

> and see information that gave her the " gifts " (dare i use this word??)

> and career paths she has taken. AND, shes happy. just another way to

> view ASD.. for all my opinions worth.... I do understand the anger

> and sadness o having a child with ASD, but that sadness wont define me

>

> Personally, while

>> curing my sons autism would be great, it is part of

>> > who he is. Am I the only one who is worried taking about the

>> quirky part

>> > of him would change him?

>> >

>> > Rathswohl

>> > Deaf Services Coordinator

>> > Dayle McIntosh Center

>> > 714 621 3300 x 341 voice

>> > 714 620 8370 fax

>> > mrathswohl@

>> >

>> > NOTICE: This message, together with any attachments is intended

>> only for

>> > the use of the individual or entity to which it is addressed and

>> may

>> > contain information that is confidential and prohibited from

>> disclosure.

>> > If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified

>> that any

>> > dissemination or copy reproduction of this message is strictly

>> > prohibited. If you have received this message in error, notify

>> the

>> > original sender immediately and delete this message and any

>> attachments

>> > from your computer

>> >

>> > If this communication involves discussion of patient care issues

>> in the

>> > performance improvement process, it is protected from discovery

>> by

>> > California Evidence Code 1157 as a confidential medical staff

>> > communication.

>> >

>> >

[Guest guest]

Hello ,

you are right to say that some people just speak before they think. But I

have to tell you, I know a parent with two children that they say are autistic.

but one, (child #1) they keep after, boy oh boy, that kid can't do " anything "

without a comment being said...every moment of the day, they observe him and

correct " e v e r yyyyyy " move he makes!!! I feel so bad for him. but the other

child. woo oh, can get away with anything. and if you tell child #2

something/anything to correct that child, that child will have a temper fit.

so, they don't say anything to child #2 to avoid that temper. Child #2 provokes

Child #1 and when child #1 reacts to child #2, He will gets into mega

trouble! While child #2 does whatever.... its so sad to see this, but while I'm

over there house, I'm told, you don't see the whole thing! But, I'm seeing the

whole things now. so do others, but when they say anything about child #2

behavior - they get " fever " from parents. While they

are out in public/stores etc.., Child #2 gets anything that is asked for

because the parents say, Child #2 behaves so well. LOL, I've seen Child #2

steal, lie in my face, and get away with everything. Parents don't see a thing.

(so they pretend) and If child #2 gets caught in action. Parents will protect

and justify the situation to make it look right. Ohhh boy. (big time drama).

I'm not speaking of you with your case, because I don't know you at all. but

sometimes, it is the poor parenting that the child behaves like they do. Child

#2 has been acting/getting away with inappropriate behavior since Child #2 was 3

years old. Now, they conveniently blame it on puberty. If that was true. LOL

Child #2 has been in puberty since 3year old...

It is wrong for someone to judge someone in a supermarket that they don't

know. but, when you do know the family, and you see what is happening. I would

think the person should say something " to wake up the parents " and if the

parents are defensive. the parents really need to look at their

situation...because poor parenting hurts the child.....*smile*

<mrathswohl@...> wrote:

I have hear this so many times myself. I have people tell me that we

are wrong, that he is just a brat, that he is totally normal. Once in

the grocery store, he was kinda frustrated and having a hard time. My

mom was walking behind me, and these people made a commend about I

should learn to control my kid, and my mom looked at them and

said " he is autistic " and the lady said " I don't care if he is

artistic, he is being a brat " I could have just strangled her, but I

laughed instead. I have also had people make comments about me

medicating Lucas. I just tell them that they can come babysit for an

afternoon without meds, and then they get to comment. My " baby " is 9

1/2 and already like 4 ft 6 and 82 lbs! He can get agressive and I

need him to have the assistance with the impulse control and for the

ADD that goes with his autism. Sometimes people just speak before

they think, and I just shake my head at them.

Personally, while

> > > > curing my sons autism would be great, it is part of

> > > > > who he is. Am I the only one who is worried taking about the

> > > > quirky part

> > > > > of him would change him?

> > > > >

> > > > > Rathswohl

> > > > > Deaf Services Coordinator

> > > > > Dayle McIntosh Center

> > > > > 714 621 3300 x 341 voice

> > > > > 714 620 8370 fax

> > > > > mrathswohl@

> > > > >

> > > > > NOTICE: This message, together with any attachments is

> intended

> > > > only for

> > > > > the use of the individual or entity to which it is addressed

> > > and

> > > > may

> > > > > contain information that is confidential and prohibited from

> > > > disclosure.

> > > > > If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby

> notified

> > > > that any

> > > > > dissemination or copy reproduction of this message is

> strictly

> > > > > prohibited. If you have received this message in error,

> notify

> > > > the

> > > > > original sender immediately and delete this message and any

> > > > attachments

> > > > > from your computer

> > > > >

> > > > > If this communication involves discussion of patient care

> > > issues

> > > > in the

> > > > > performance improvement process, it is protected from

> discovery

> > > > by

> > > > > California Evidence Code 1157 as a confidential medical

staff

> > > > > communication.

> > > > >

> > > > >

[Guest guest]

I tried to teach my son a while back about the golden rule (Do onto others as

you would want them to do on to you). Well it back fired when he was mean to

this kid and I asked him why he did that and he said the boy had been mean to

him so he figured the boy must want him to be mean to him. See, he thought

everyone knew the golden rule and figured how they treat him is how they must

want him to treat them! I had to explain to him that the golden rule only

applies to himself. (Although it would be nice if eveyone obeyed the golden

rule!) I told him he needs to treat people the way he would like to be treated,

no matter how they treat him.

advocateforaspies <advocateforaspies@...> wrote: Oh, and lastly,

just in case that comment was for me, I didn't ever

say all they (kids with autism) need is for ignorant people to be

fixed. I would never say that, but wasn't sure if that was something

that you got from my post. That isn't all our kids need but that is a

BIG part of what they do need.

Also, I have a feeling everyone agrees with you (Me, too ;-) that

having A.S. is a big deal. It is a pain to have to deal with the

sensory, social, and every other issue our kids (AND we) have.

our world is already full of individuals that 'don't get it, or us'

and we are going to have to rub shoulders and get some people flaming

mad, (because we are all going to voice our opinions) but that is what

needs to be done.

I am working on teaching my kids on how to get along with other kids

in the world, just wish other parents would do the same. My kids

believe all kids should be treated nicely, it just doesn't happen to

them.

I feel my kids will be ahead because of what I teach them.

:-)

>

> Roxanna <madideas@...> wrote:

> My kids have " high functioning " autism and I do not agree

that all they need is for " ignorant " people to be fixed. They need a

LOT more than that to get by in the world. I don't think it helps when

there are people who think it's not a big deal to have AS either. This

makes it a lot harder to educate people about the very real problems

kids like mine face. It's easy for people to blame " everyone else " for

the problems but what does that resolve? Nothing. It might make some

folks feel better to blame others or to think it's always the rest of

the world that needs to be fixed. But let's face it - how far will you

get in life with that attitude? I mean, we should teach our kids how

to get along in the world as it is and not as we wish it was. I think

this applies to all kids, not just kids with HFA.

>

> Roxanna

>

[Guest guest]

I am sorry if I missed this! But how did she get mercury poisoning? I am sorry

that she has to go through that!!! But at the same time I am glad for you that

you found out!!! Sorry to sound ignorant!!!!!! Thanks

jennifer_thorson <jennifer_thorson@...> wrote: I love my husband

and daughter, but now that I know that she has

mercury poisoning I think about things differently. I look at my

husband now and it makes sense that he probably has AS. That is

what drew me to him. But also what I initially loved about his

personality is what makes me go crazy when trying to raise children

with him. He has a mouth full of mercury fillings. He has not been

tested for mercury poioning because we cannot afford to remove all

his fillings and replace them with non toxic fillings. But we can

help our daughter. I don't feel that chelation is changing her

uniqueness. It is helping her not lose control. Mercury is poison

and will continue to destroy her brain until it is removed. There

are side effects of removing metals and I have been dealing with the

more minimal problems over the last 3 months. I think my daughter

will always be a little eccentric, but I want her to have a better

chance to have a normal life. Watching her make friends and

participate in school is why it is worth it.

Jen

> >

> > I dont think any of claimed to celebrate autism or view it as a

> gift.

> > if i had a choice (which I dont) I would elect for alex to be

NT.

> I

> > dont enjoy seeing him struggle or have to learn things that NT

> kids

> > get naturally. I wont speak for the rest, but my point is that

>

> > is what he is. I know i have no control over a cure. i control

how

> i

> > parent him. I control his education and the influances he gains

> from

> > educators and other people in his life. I control weather or not

i

> > sit and do nothing or educate others in my life about autism. I

> > refuse to let alex be defined by autism. I refuse to contribute

to

> > ignorance with silence, and i refuse to morn who alex could have

> been

> > and choose to celebrate who he IS. I will not agree that autism

is

> a

> > curse for my child. Parents of more profoundly autistic children

> have

> > the right to feel bitter about a child they see as lost.. i feel

> for

> > those families. but i dont generalize. I speak for my family

from

> my

> > experiences. My isnt lost he isnt cursed. nothing is easy,

> but

> > things worth having usually arent. Every accomplishment adds

> > character and strength as much as a newley learned ability. Has

> > anyone heard of that lady (robert knows her name) who was born

> > proundly autistic..now she's an author, college professor and

> designs

> > slaughterhouses all over the world for the humane slaughter of

> cows

> > and pigs..its because of her autism and how it caused her to

think

> > and see information that gave her the " gifts " (dare i use this

> word??)

> > and career paths she has taken. AND, shes happy. just another

way

> to

> > view ASD.. for all my opinions worth.... I do understand the

anger

> > and sadness o having a child with ASD, but that sadness wont

> define me

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > --- In

>

>

>

>

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

Oh I like it!

Rose wrote:

>

> Hello Donna B

> I that has happened to me too. I won't go into detains. but a *smart*

> answer for - " someone has it worse than you " .... Yes, but " someone has

> it better too " . some people have too much time on their hands and too

> quick to judge.

> Hugs

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote:

> When my son was only 2-3 years old and constantly dealing with chronic

> BAD diarrhea (to the point where leaving the house was a real

> difficulty), constant funky rashes, food sensitivities to where he'd

> hardly eat anything, barely talking, etc., an acquaintance of mine was

> dealing with a terminal illness with her child, a few years older. I

> understood the differences -- fatal vs. non -- but I will always

> remember that when she'd ask me how ds was doing, or he'd come up in a

> conversation with others while she was there, she was the first to say

> " Sure beats having to get up at night to check oxygen levels or change

> his feeding tube. " I'm sure she didn't mean it to, but it always made me

> feel as though she was chastising me for so much as thinking anything

> was 'tough' for me. After a while, I'd just say " fine " all the time,

> which wasn't true, but it wasn't a time for me to say " You know, your

> situation being so rough doesn't make mine 'easy' or 'minimal.' " People

> all view their own situations differently, and a big part of dealing

> with anyone's disabilities or whatever you want to call it is realizing

> that everyone will of course view their own as worse. It doesn't mean

> any one illness deserves more money, but of course I would love to see

> money come away from something else to go towards autism research...for

> example, the war in Iraq, the space program, lol, I could go on....

>

> If I had a quarter for each time someone said " He looks okay to me "

> after seeing my ds for all of 2 minutes, I'd be rich and could afford to

> pay cash for all the treatment necessary to help him cope on his own

> someday.

>

> Roxanna wrote:

> >

> > CF " deserves " a cure before autism? Who gets to decide these things

> > anyway? It is always true that you will find someone who has it worse

> > than you do - that is just the way life goes. I'm not sure why that

> > would mean one cannot feel how they do about what is happening. It

> > still sucks - even if someone has it worse off.

> >

> > Roxanna

> > ( ) Re:Autism Cure, huh?

> >

> > Autism is a disability. I am fully aware of the problems my son is

> > experiencing and will experience for the rest of his life. It is my

> > job as his mother to teach him skills and ways to cope. I however do

> > not see my son as " disabled " . A disability only disables you to the

> > limit that you let it (or in my son's case, as I let it disable him).

> > I work for a Non-profit independent living center, and have to say,

> > until I had a chance to work with people who have profound and life

> > limiting or changing disabilities, I thought Lucas would be limited,

> > but when you work with the woman how can only use a very small part

> > of her hand and her mouth, and still she works full time, or the deaf

> > blind man who works as a computer progamer, I have learned that

> > limiting my dreams for my son would be a disservice to him. He has

> > dreams and goals and plans. Maybe if he were nonverbal or severly

> > limited by the autism would I want to cure it, but his being autistic

> > is why he thinks and talks the way he does. I am not saying a cure it

> > bad, but I worry about the concequences. If I could be sure that I

> > would be able to cure him, but keep his unique self, then I would

> > jump through hoops. But they can't cure Tay Sachs or Cystic Fibrosis

> > and I think those require a cure long befor autism. The other thing

> > that worries me is, if we have the genetic testing become avalible,

> > how many people will terminate pregancies based on the autism

> > diagnosis? How can we tell where on the spectrum a child will fall

> > before birth? I live with a person with autism every single day, and

> > I don't think the autism is a gift, but a part of the person who my

> > son is. I guess because I think that he is a gift from God that I

> > accept the challanges that the autism brings along with the honest,

> > sweet, loving, frustrating, cute, impish little boy that is my whole

> > world.

> >

> > Personally, while

> > > curing my sons autism would be great, it is part of

> > > > who he is. Am I the only one who is worried taking about the

> > > quirky part

> > > > of him would change him?

> > > >

> > > > Rathswohl

> > > > Deaf Services Coordinator

> > > > Dayle McIntosh Center

> > > > 714 621 3300 x 341 voice

> > > > 714 620 8370 fax

> > > > mrathswohl@

> > > >

> > > > NOTICE: This message, together with any attachments is intended

> > > only for

> > > > the use of the individual or entity to which it is addressed

> > and

> > > may

> > > > contain information that is confidential and prohibited from

> > > disclosure.

> > > > If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified

> > > that any

> > > > dissemination or copy reproduction of this message is strictly

> > > > prohibited. If you have received this message in error, notify

> > > the

> > > > original sender immediately and delete this message and any

> > > attachments

> > > > from your computer

> > > >

> > > > If this communication involves discussion of patient care

> > issues

> > > in the

> > > > performance improvement process, it is protected from discovery

> > > by

> > > > California Evidence Code 1157 as a confidential medical staff

> > > > communication.

> > > >

> > > >

[Guest guest]

To be completely honest though, unless we're living with the family, how

do we *really* know? I'd hate for someone to think they were helping me

become a better parent unless they were around enough to really know,

especially if we're just talking discipline. Obviously, there are things

you do speak to people about, but just because our style isn't theirs,

does that make theirs wrong? I guess I'm really sensitive to this --

I've had so many people make comments about my son's behavior, and the

fact that we homeschool and have a larger-than-normal family size has

given more reason for people to comment even though it's none of their

business. (We are non-spankers...you'd be amazed how many people think a

good spanking is all my son needs, ha.) I should just develop a thicker

skin, but I also think people ought to think twice before they comment,

too -- will it really the person/family, or make them feel even more

overwhelmed than they already feel? I'm sure there are days people think

I'm not the best mom or that my patience is gone, but they don't know

what I was dealing with before they came around, or what just happened

two minutes before..if I got any sleep...if I can't pay the medical

bills...if we're trying a new med that's only making things worse. So

many reasons for people to parent like they do, you know?

Rose wrote:

>

> Hello ,

> you are right to say that some people just speak before they think.

> But I have to tell you, I know a parent with two children that they

> say are autistic. but one, (child #1) they keep after, boy oh boy,

> that kid can't do " anything " without a comment being said...every

> moment of the day, they observe him and correct " e v e r yyyyyy " move

> he makes!!! I feel so bad for him. but the other child. woo oh, can

> get away with anything. and if you tell child #2 something/anything to

> correct that child, that child will have a temper fit. so, they don't

> say anything to child #2 to avoid that temper. Child #2 provokes Child

> #1 and when child #1 reacts to child #2, He will gets into mega

> trouble! While child #2 does whatever.... its so sad to see this, but

> while I'm over there house, I'm told, you don't see the whole thing!

> But, I'm seeing the whole things now. so do others, but when they say

> anything about child #2 behavior - they get " fever " from parents.

> While they

> are out in public/stores etc.., Child #2 gets anything that is asked

> for because the parents say, Child #2 behaves so well. LOL, I've seen

> Child #2 steal, lie in my face, and get away with everything. Parents

> don't see a thing. (so they pretend) and If child #2 gets caught in

> action. Parents will protect and justify the situation to make it look

> right. Ohhh boy. (big time drama).

> I'm not speaking of you with your case, because I don't know you at

> all. but sometimes, it is the poor parenting that the child behaves

> like they do. Child #2 has been acting/getting away with inappropriate

> behavior since Child #2 was 3 years old. Now, they conveniently blame

> it on puberty. If that was true. LOL Child #2 has been in puberty

> since 3year old...

> It is wrong for someone to judge someone in a supermarket that they

> don't know. but, when you do know the family, and you see what is

> happening. I would think the person should say something " to wake up

> the parents " and if the parents are defensive. the parents really need

> to look at their situation...because poor parenting hurts the

> child.....*smile*

> <mrathswohl@... <mailto:mrathswohl%40daylemc.org>> wrote:

> I have hear this so many times myself. I have people tell me that we

> are wrong, that he is just a brat, that he is totally normal. Once in

> the grocery store, he was kinda frustrated and having a hard time. My

> mom was walking behind me, and these people made a commend about I

> should learn to control my kid, and my mom looked at them and

> said " he is autistic " and the lady said " I don't care if he is

> artistic, he is being a brat " I could have just strangled her, but I

> laughed instead. I have also had people make comments about me

> medicating Lucas. I just tell them that they can come babysit for an

> afternoon without meds, and then they get to comment. My " baby " is 9

> 1/2 and already like 4 ft 6 and 82 lbs! He can get agressive and I

> need him to have the assistance with the impulse control and for the

> ADD that goes with his autism. Sometimes people just speak before

> they think, and I just shake my head at them.

>

>

> >

> > Ugh, I hear that ALL the time about my two kids who have

> > asperger's...They LOOK fine. It's just makes me cringe and have

> > bite my tongue.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

>

>

> Now only if more people, especially recognized medical professionals,

> would concede that mercury can contribute to autism --- people ought

> to notice how eerily similar the symptoms of mercury poisoning and

> autism are, I'd never have known...

>

> jennifer_thorson <jennifer_thorson@...

> <mailto:jennifer_thorson%40>> wrote: I love my husband and

> daughter, but now that I know that she has

> mercury poisoning I think about things differently. I look at my

> husband now and it makes sense that he probably has AS. That is

> what drew me to him. But also what I initially loved about his

> personality is what makes me go crazy when trying to raise children

> with him. He has a mouth full of mercury fillings. He has not been

> tested for mercury poioning because we cannot afford to remove all

> his fillings and replace them with non toxic fillings. But we can

> help our daughter. I don't feel that chelation is changing her

> uniqueness. It is helping her not lose control. Mercury is poison

> and will continue to destroy her brain until it is removed. There

> are side effects of removing metals and I have been dealing with the

> more minimal problems over the last 3 months. I think my daughter

> will always be a little eccentric, but I want her to have a better

> chance to have a normal life. Watching her make friends and

> participate in school is why it is worth it.

>

> Jen

>

>

> >

> > I like your outlook on the cup of water!! I think that more people

> should just be happy with what they have and not think of what they

> did or could!!! That is they way that I am trying to view my life!!!

>

>

[Guest guest]

You sound like an awesome mom! and congratulations on your new baby.

<mrathswohl@...> wrote: Hi Rose,

I do know exactly what you mean! My non-autistic nephew gets away

with murder at his house with his parents. My sister is a very lax

parent. When I am there...boy is he different. I will correct him. I

am comfortable doing it because I told my sister when he was very

small, that if he acted out I was not having it...but I did clear

that with her long before the issue came up. My son, I think, has

pretty darn good manners, but it has taken us almost 10 years to get

him there. My MIL constantly tells me I am too hard on him. I reply

with " I expect what he is capable of " . He has learned that social

rules are just that, rules, and even if he doen't " get " them, they

are to be followed. We are very lucky with him. My husband and I

brainstormed and talked after the diagnosis, and decided that, while

yes he needs accomidations, we were going to treat him like we would

a " normal " kid. It has paid off. We accommidate him by no sudden

changes, lots of warning, but I still am the homework drill sargent.

Sorry, getting off topic. My son, he doen't really act out in the

stores, because I will ground him from every fun thing he owns, and

he knows it. If he needs to speak out or be physical, he is learning

to tell me that he is frustrated or he is mad, and then we work on

breathing and talking it out. Part of that is because I am only 5 ft

1 and he comes to my nose already, he is 9 1/2! So I guess my

statement is bad behavior is partly due to the AS and partly due to

parenting.

I do agree that it is in bad form to comment if you don't know the

family, but if you do, I think commenting, if done right, is okay. I

can't imagine having 2 AS kids, but we are having a new baby next

year. So maybe it will happen, maybe not. I do know, that my kids

will be different, but they will have the same rules to follow.

>

> Hello ,

> you are right to say that some people just speak before they

think. But I have to tell you, I know a parent with two children

that they say are autistic. but one, (child #1) they keep after, boy

oh boy, that kid can't do " anything " without a comment being

said...every moment of the day, they observe him and correct " e v e r

yyyyyy " move he makes!!! I feel so bad for him. but the other

child. woo oh, can get away with anything. and if you tell child #2

something/anything to correct that child, that child will have a

temper fit. so, they don't say anything to child #2 to avoid that

temper. Child #2 provokes Child #1 and when child #1 reacts to

child #2, He will gets into mega trouble! While child #2 does

whatever.... its so sad to see this, but while I'm over there house,

I'm told, you don't see the whole thing! But, I'm seeing the whole

things now. so do others, but when they say anything about child #2

behavior - they get " fever " from parents. While they

> are out in public/stores etc.., Child #2 gets anything that is

asked for because the parents say, Child #2 behaves so well. LOL,

I've seen Child #2 steal, lie in my face, and get away with

everything. Parents don't see a thing. (so they pretend) and If

child #2 gets caught in action. Parents will protect and justify the

situation to make it look right. Ohhh boy. (big time drama).

> I'm not speaking of you with your case, because I don't know you

at all. but sometimes, it is the poor parenting that the child

behaves like they do. Child #2 has been acting/getting away with

inappropriate behavior since Child #2 was 3 years old. Now, they

conveniently blame it on puberty. If that was true. LOL Child #2 has

been in puberty since 3year old...

> It is wrong for someone to judge someone in a supermarket that

they don't know. but, when you do know the family, and you see what

is happening. I would think the person should say something " to wake

up the parents " and if the parents are defensive. the parents really

need to look at their situation...because poor parenting hurts the

child.....*smile*

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

I hate nothing more than judgement and ill placed comments by other people!! I

bought this shirt. it states " parenting advise not appreicated unless you also

have an autistic child " . alex has a shirt that says " Im Austic, whats your

excuse? " and " what, is my autism showing? " I hope these will at least stop

unkind unsolicited comments. May not stop people from thinking things about me

and my kid... but willgive them something to think about! go to cafepress.com..

they have tons of shirts about asd... prices are ok.. i just like instant

gradification and made my own! The sayings on the shirts are awesome.

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote: To be completely honest though,

unless we're living with the family, how

do we *really* know? I'd hate for someone to think they were helping me

become a better parent unless they were around enough to really know,

especially if we're just talking discipline. Obviously, there are things

you do speak to people about, but just because our style isn't theirs,

does that make theirs wrong? I guess I'm really sensitive to this --

I've had so many people make comments about my son's behavior, and the

fact that we homeschool and have a larger-than-normal family size has

given more reason for people to comment even though it's none of their

business. (We are non-spankers...you'd be amazed how many people think a

good spanking is all my son needs, ha.) I should just develop a thicker

skin, but I also think people ought to think twice before they comment,

too -- will it really the person/family, or make them feel even more

overwhelmed than they already feel? I'm sure there are days people think

I'm not the best mom or that my patience is gone, but they don't know

what I was dealing with before they came around, or what just happened

two minutes before..if I got any sleep...if I can't pay the medical

bills...if we're trying a new med that's only making things worse. So

many reasons for people to parent like they do, you know?

Rose wrote:

>

> Hello ,

> you are right to say that some people just speak before they think.

> But I have to tell you, I know a parent with two children that they

> say are autistic. but one, (child #1) they keep after, boy oh boy,

> that kid can't do " anything " without a comment being said...every

> moment of the day, they observe him and correct " e v e r yyyyyy " move

> he makes!!! I feel so bad for him. but the other child. woo oh, can

> get away with anything. and if you tell child #2 something/anything to

> correct that child, that child will have a temper fit. so, they don't

> say anything to child #2 to avoid that temper. Child #2 provokes Child

> #1 and when child #1 reacts to child #2, He will gets into mega

> trouble! While child #2 does whatever.... its so sad to see this, but

> while I'm over there house, I'm told, you don't see the whole thing!

> But, I'm seeing the whole things now. so do others, but when they say

> anything about child #2 behavior - they get " fever " from parents.

> While they

> are out in public/stores etc.., Child #2 gets anything that is asked

> for because the parents say, Child #2 behaves so well. LOL, I've seen

> Child #2 steal, lie in my face, and get away with everything. Parents

> don't see a thing. (so they pretend) and If child #2 gets caught in

> action. Parents will protect and justify the situation to make it look

> right. Ohhh boy. (big time drama).

> I'm not speaking of you with your case, because I don't know you at

> all. but sometimes, it is the poor parenting that the child behaves

> like they do. Child #2 has been acting/getting away with inappropriate

> behavior since Child #2 was 3 years old. Now, they conveniently blame

> it on puberty. If that was true. LOL Child #2 has been in puberty

> since 3year old...

> It is wrong for someone to judge someone in a supermarket that they

> don't know. but, when you do know the family, and you see what is

> happening. I would think the person should say something " to wake up

> the parents " and if the parents are defensive. the parents really need

> to look at their situation...because poor parenting hurts the

> child.....*smile*

> <mrathswohl@... <mailto:mrathswohl%40daylemc.org>> wrote:

> I have hear this so many times myself. I have people tell me that we

> are wrong, that he is just a brat, that he is totally normal. Once in

> the grocery store, he was kinda frustrated and having a hard time. My

> mom was walking behind me, and these people made a commend about I

> should learn to control my kid, and my mom looked at them and

> said " he is autistic " and the lady said " I don't care if he is

> artistic, he is being a brat " I could have just strangled her, but I

> laughed instead. I have also had people make comments about me

> medicating Lucas. I just tell them that they can come babysit for an

> afternoon without meds, and then they get to comment. My " baby " is 9

> 1/2 and already like 4 ft 6 and 82 lbs! He can get agressive and I

> need him to have the assistance with the impulse control and for the

> ADD that goes with his autism. Sometimes people just speak before

> they think, and I just shake my head at them.

>

>

> >

> > Ugh, I hear that ALL the time about my two kids who have

> > asperger's...They LOOK fine. It's just makes me cringe and have

> > bite my tongue.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

My son goes completely banana's every time my sister comes to visit. He'll be

super hyper and just so excited he forgets some rules but that's not how he

normally behaves. So yeah, there just may be some different behavior going on

when certain people are around and they shouldn't judge your parenting based on

that time.

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote: To be completely honest though,

unless we're living with the family, how

do we *really* know? I'd hate for someone to think they were helping me

become a better parent unless they were around enough to really know,

especially if we're just talking discipline. Obviously, there are things

you do speak to people about, but just because our style isn't theirs,

does that make theirs wrong? I guess I'm really sensitive to this --

I've had so many people make comments about my son's behavior, and the

fact that we homeschool and have a larger-than-normal family size has

given more reason for people to comment even though it's none of their

business. (We are non-spankers...you'd be amazed how many people think a

good spanking is all my son needs, ha.) I should just develop a thicker

skin, but I also think people ought to think twice before they comment,

too -- will it really the person/family, or make them feel even more

overwhelmed than they already feel? I'm sure there are days people think

I'm not the best mom or that my patience is gone, but they don't know

what I was dealing with before they came around, or what just happened

two minutes before..if I got any sleep...if I can't pay the medical

bills...if we're trying a new med that's only making things worse. So

many reasons for people to parent like they do, you know?

Rose wrote:

>

> Hello ,

> you are right to say that some people just speak before they think.

> But I have to tell you, I know a parent with two children that they

> say are autistic. but one, (child #1) they keep after, boy oh boy,

> that kid can't do " anything " without a comment being said...every

> moment of the day, they observe him and correct " e v e r yyyyyy " move

> he makes!!! I feel so bad for him. but the other child. woo oh, can

> get away with anything. and if you tell child #2 something/anything to

> correct that child, that child will have a temper fit. so, they don't

> say anything to child #2 to avoid that temper. Child #2 provokes Child

> #1 and when child #1 reacts to child #2, He will gets into mega

> trouble! While child #2 does whatever.... its so sad to see this, but

> while I'm over there house, I'm told, you don't see the whole thing!

> But, I'm seeing the whole things now. so do others, but when they say

> anything about child #2 behavior - they get " fever " from parents.

> While they

> are out in public/stores etc.., Child #2 gets anything that is asked

> for because the parents say, Child #2 behaves so well. LOL, I've seen

> Child #2 steal, lie in my face, and get away with everything. Parents

> don't see a thing. (so they pretend) and If child #2 gets caught in

> action. Parents will protect and justify the situation to make it look

> right. Ohhh boy. (big time drama).

> I'm not speaking of you with your case, because I don't know you at

> all. but sometimes, it is the poor parenting that the child behaves

> like they do. Child #2 has been acting/getting away with inappropriate

> behavior since Child #2 was 3 years old. Now, they conveniently blame

> it on puberty. If that was true. LOL Child #2 has been in puberty

> since 3year old...

> It is wrong for someone to judge someone in a supermarket that they

> don't know. but, when you do know the family, and you see what is

> happening. I would think the person should say something " to wake up

> the parents " and if the parents are defensive. the parents really need

> to look at their situation...because poor parenting hurts the

> child.....*smile*

> <mrathswohl@... <mailto:mrathswohl%40daylemc.org>> wrote:

> I have hear this so many times myself. I have people tell me that we

> are wrong, that he is just a brat, that he is totally normal. Once in

> the grocery store, he was kinda frustrated and having a hard time. My

> mom was walking behind me, and these people made a commend about I

> should learn to control my kid, and my mom looked at them and

> said " he is autistic " and the lady said " I don't care if he is

> artistic, he is being a brat " I could have just strangled her, but I

> laughed instead. I have also had people make comments about me

> medicating Lucas. I just tell them that they can come babysit for an

> afternoon without meds, and then they get to comment. My " baby " is 9

> 1/2 and already like 4 ft 6 and 82 lbs! He can get agressive and I

> need him to have the assistance with the impulse control and for the

> ADD that goes with his autism. Sometimes people just speak before

> they think, and I just shake my head at them.

>

>

> >

> > Ugh, I hear that ALL the time about my two kids who have

> > asperger's...They LOOK fine. It's just makes me cringe and have

> > bite my tongue.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at a loss as

to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for autism i mean.. but

like was said before.. we dont have control over that which is a double wammy

when I feel helpless some days to begin with...

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote: My husband and I have discussed

this before -- cure? Or helping him

learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

person as he grows.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> i agree with you all as well. is three with autism. one of my

> fears with behavior mod was that we would crush his spirit. His spirit

> is what i admire so much about him. Granted his " spirit " makes it a

> bit tougher to parent but like was said before we need to adjust our

> parenting, not change our childrens core being, true personality.

> Perhaps its the Autism that contributes to who he is.. so be it. I

> love for who he is. I want to ensure he will be able to function

> on his own when that time comes. Iwanthim to understand howto be

> socially appropriate and yet not feel he has to change who he IS to do

> that. thats my goal. Not cureing him.

>

> <mkisses@... <mailto:mkisses%40nc.rr.com>> wrote: What a

> refreshing point of view! I agree with you. My daughter is 12

> with Asperger's, Mild MR (so she is more like 7 emotionally) and

> has a seizure disorder (it hit us when she started puberty). She is

> always eager to please, to see others happy, to save animals that

> people hurt on road or just let go cause they didn't want them

> anymore. She is sensitive to a fault but affectionate and still

> wants to hold my hand. She talks about never leaving me (we're

> working on SOME independence....lol) and does get excited about the

> small joys in life that other kids her age would not even notice let

> alone get excited about. I love her the way she is. In fact, I

> wish I could share in her innocence and joys of every little miracle

> around us. She is beautiful and amazing.

>

>

[Guest guest]

how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at a loss as

to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for autism i mean.. but

like was said before.. we dont have control over that which is a double wammy

when I feel helpless some days to begin with...

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote: My husband and I have discussed

this before -- cure? Or helping him

learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

person as he grows.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> i agree with you all as well. is three with autism. one of my

> fears with behavior mod was that we would crush his spirit. His spirit

> is what i admire so much about him. Granted his " spirit " makes it a

> bit tougher to parent but like was said before we need to adjust our

> parenting, not change our childrens core being, true personality.

> Perhaps its the Autism that contributes to who he is.. so be it. I

> love for who he is. I want to ensure he will be able to function

> on his own when that time comes. Iwanthim to understand howto be

> socially appropriate and yet not feel he has to change who he IS to do

> that. thats my goal. Not cureing him.

>

> <mkisses@... <mailto:mkisses%40nc.rr.com>> wrote: What a

> refreshing point of view! I agree with you. My daughter is 12

> with Asperger's, Mild MR (so she is more like 7 emotionally) and

> has a seizure disorder (it hit us when she started puberty). She is

> always eager to please, to see others happy, to save animals that

> people hurt on road or just let go cause they didn't want them

> anymore. She is sensitive to a fault but affectionate and still

> wants to hold my hand. She talks about never leaving me (we're

> working on SOME independence....lol) and does get excited about the

> small joys in life that other kids her age would not even notice let

> alone get excited about. I love her the way she is. In fact, I

> wish I could share in her innocence and joys of every little miracle

> around us. She is beautiful and amazing.

>

>

[Guest guest]

He just turned six. Behavioral therapy weekly has helped, but he's still

got a ways to go -- we get one thing a little better, and something else

crops up. Ds has major control issues, too.

The last couple of days he's not nearly as verbal as normal, even his

teachers have noticed it. It worries me a little and it's something I'm

definitely watching.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at

> a loss as to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for

> autism i mean.. but like was said before.. we dont have control over

> that which is a double wammy when I feel helpless some days to begin

> with...

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote: My

> husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

> what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

> than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

> love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

> help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

> worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

> he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

> the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

> are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

> to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

> things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

> person as he grows.

>

[Guest guest]

we talked to his dr about agression impulse control etc..(our dr is

UNDEReducated about characteristics of autism) and asked for a sleep study. alex

rairly sleeps more than 5 hours at a time and wakes up often and doesnt nap

despite my insisting he be on a schedule. our dr gave us sleep medicine.. no

change at all. i know when he's tired he has less control and is very

contrary.we went to ENT and were told that his adnoids and tonsils were the size

of an adult.. and alex is just three! needless to say they are removing them,

hopefully helping him to sleep and reducing his overtired behavior. im praaying

it makes a difference. if not, i dont know whatelse to do!! GRR!

do you think the medicine is making him act differently? i hate medicine...

its usually a trade off. one thing gets better but the meds cause some other

thing.. i read about the holisitc approach all the time.. i just dont know

enough about it to try it with alex. i hope itdoesnt get to the point where alex

is on meds. that scares me.

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote:

He just turned six. Behavioral therapy weekly has helped, but he's

still

got a ways to go -- we get one thing a little better, and something else

crops up. Ds has major control issues, too.

The last couple of days he's not nearly as verbal as normal, even his

teachers have noticed it. It worries me a little and it's something I'm

definitely watching.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at

> a loss as to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for

> autism i mean.. but like was said before.. we dont have control over

> that which is a double wammy when I feel helpless some days to begin

> with...

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote: My

> husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

> what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

> than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

> love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

> help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

> worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

> he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

> the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

> are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

> to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

> things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

> person as he grows.

>

[Guest guest]

Hello ,

we had that same problem with sleep. long story short, we had to do the same

thing and at 3years old too. take out his adenoids & tonsils. this was great,

he slept very well and no snoring or coughing. yeah!!! this went well until he

was almost 4 years old. I noticed the loud snoring, coughing and loss of sleep

- all over again. I took him to another ENT (we moved) and he said - wooow, his

adenoids and tonsils are so Hugh, they have to come out now. I said they were

taken out last year. OMG!! the x-rays showed they grew back. so, we had them

taken out again. a 2nd time within one year. My son is now 10, and I'm

starting to see the signs again, (very little right now) the snoring,

coughing??? I was told this is very rare that they grow back. But his sleeping

was a Hugh improvement when they removed his adenoids and tonsils.

best wishes for you and your son. Hugs.

HEATHER BEEM <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote:

we talked to his dr about agression impulse control etc..(our dr is

UNDEReducated about characteristics of autism) and asked for a sleep study. alex

rairly sleeps more than 5 hours at a time and wakes up often and doesnt nap

despite my insisting he be on a schedule. our dr gave us sleep medicine.. no

change at all. i know when he's tired he has less control and is very

contrary.we went to ENT and were told that his adnoids and tonsils were the size

of an adult.. and alex is just three! needless to say they are removing them,

hopefully helping him to sleep and reducing his overtired behavior. im praaying

it makes a difference. if not, i dont know whatelse to do!! GRR!

do you think the medicine is making him act differently? i hate medicine... its

usually a trade off. one thing gets better but the meds cause some other thing..

i read about the holisitc approach all the time.. i just dont know enough about

it to try it with alex. i hope itdoesnt get to the point where alex is on meds.

that scares me.

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote:

He just turned six. Behavioral therapy weekly has helped, but he's still

got a ways to go -- we get one thing a little better, and something else

crops up. Ds has major control issues, too.

The last couple of days he's not nearly as verbal as normal, even his

teachers have noticed it. It worries me a little and it's something I'm

definitely watching.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at

> a loss as to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for

> autism i mean.. but like was said before.. we dont have control over

> that which is a double wammy when I feel helpless some days to begin

> with...

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote: My

> husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

> what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

> than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

> love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

> help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

> worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

> he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

> the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

> are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

> to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

> things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

> person as he grows.

>

[Guest guest]

WHAT?!?!?! THEY GROW BACK?? I didnt know that...are you serious??

Rose <beachbodytan2002@...> Hello ,

we had that same problem with sleep. long story short, we had to do the same

thing and at 3years old too. take out his adenoids & tonsils. this was great, he

slept very well and no snoring or coughing. yeah!!! this went well until he was

almost 4 years old. I noticed the loud snoring, coughing and loss of sleep - all

over again. I took him to another ENT (we moved) and he said - wooow, his

adenoids and tonsils are so Hugh, they have to come out now. I said they were

taken out last year. OMG!! the x-rays showed they grew back. so, we had them

taken out again. a 2nd time within one year. My son is now 10, and I'm starting

to see the signs again, (very little right now) the snoring, coughing??? I was

told this is very rare that they grow back. But his sleeping was a Hugh

improvement when they removed his adenoids and tonsils.

best wishes for you and your son. Hugs.

HEATHER BEEM <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote:

we talked to his dr about agression impulse control etc..(our dr is

UNDEReducated about characteristics of autism) and asked for a sleep study. alex

rairly sleeps more than 5 hours at a time and wakes up often and doesnt nap

despite my insisting he be on a schedule. our dr gave us sleep medicine.. no

change at all. i know when he's tired he has less control and is very

contrary.we went to ENT and were told that his adnoids and tonsils were the size

of an adult.. and alex is just three! needless to say they are removing them,

hopefully helping him to sleep and reducing his overtired behavior. im praaying

it makes a difference. if not, i dont know whatelse to do!! GRR!

do you think the medicine is making him act differently? i hate medicine... its

usually a trade off. one thing gets better but the meds cause some other thing..

i read about the holisitc approach all the time.. i just dont know enough about

it to try it with alex. i hope itdoesnt get to the point where alex is on meds.

that scares me.

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote:

He just turned six. Behavioral therapy weekly has helped, but he's still

got a ways to go -- we get one thing a little better, and something else

crops up. Ds has major control issues, too.

The last couple of days he's not nearly as verbal as normal, even his

teachers have noticed it. It worries me a little and it's something I'm

definitely watching.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at

> a loss as to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for

> autism i mean.. but like was said before.. we dont have control over

> that which is a double wammy when I feel helpless some days to begin

> with...

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote: My

> husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

> what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

> than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

> love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

> help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

> worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

> he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

> the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

> are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

> to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

> things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

> person as he grows.

>

[Guest guest]

What medicine is he on? We use clonidine -- the only side-effects that

are visibly obvious are some drowsiness, but he takes it at night only

so that's intended. Otherwise, we see no difference though his

aggression is a bit better and he stopped picking/flicking his fingers

until they bled, and his ears are no longer raw from constantly rubbing

them.

Tonsil/adenoid removal can make a huge impact on a child's sleep...huge.

My now 12 yod had hers taken out almost a year ago, they were so huge

they thought she might be having sleep apnea. She's had migraines for

years, and moved onto grand mal seizures in 11/05, and has chronic sinus

problems, upper resp. issues, chronic croup, a litany of stuff. The

surgery helped, but she's still being treated for sinus issues that may

require outpatient surgery. She also has a deviated septum now. One

thing after another with her, and sadly they don't think it's related to

her seizures at all. She does do much better now though after getting a

better night's sleep, so that's great you're getting your son taken care

of -- I wish we'd known earlier, our ENT feels dd suffered needlessly

for years with enlarged adenoids/tonsils.

We've not done a sleep study yet, but there are times I think it's a

good idea. Our neuro said we could add in another portion of clonidine

at midnight, when he is awake again, but the problem is more that he

keeps waking up, not that he stays up. I'd rather him go to sleep at 9pm

and stay in bed the whole night. I need to try the extra clonidine

though and see if it keeps him asleep from midnight to 6-7am and if that

improves his behavior.

I'm with you in that overall, I dislike medicines. It took bleeding

fingers and raw ears and clawed out eyes (and some bruises/cuts on dh

and I) to finally accept the prescription. We've seen been offered

Risperdal, but are waiting to see if we can avoid it. Some days his

aggression is so much better, and we still hope that behavioral therapy

does the trick. It's helping, but not as much as we'd hoped. Our son has

the honor of being one of the two most stubborn our behaviorist has ever

seen in all her years, and his zero-to-sixty aggression is difficult to

manage.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> we talked to his dr about agression impulse control etc..(our dr is

> UNDEReducated about characteristics of autism) and asked for a sleep

> study. alex rairly sleeps more than 5 hours at a time and wakes up

> often and doesnt nap despite my insisting he be on a schedule. our dr

> gave us sleep medicine.. no change at all. i know when he's tired he

> has less control and is very contrary.we went to ENT and were told

> that his adnoids and tonsils were the size of an adult.. and alex is

> just three! needless to say they are removing them, hopefully helping

> him to sleep and reducing his overtired behavior. im praaying it makes

> a difference. if not, i dont know whatelse to do!! GRR!

>

> do you think the medicine is making him act differently? i hate

> medicine... its usually a trade off. one thing gets better but the

> meds cause some other thing.. i read about the holisitc approach all

> the time.. i just dont know enough about it to try it with alex. i

> hope itdoesnt get to the point where alex is on meds. that scares me.

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote:

> He just turned six. Behavioral therapy weekly has helped, but he's still

> got a ways to go -- we get one thing a little better, and something else

> crops up. Ds has major control issues, too.

>

> The last couple of days he's not nearly as verbal as normal, even his

> teachers have noticed it. It worries me a little and it's something I'm

> definitely watching.

>

> HEATHER BEEM wrote:

> >

> > how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at

> > a loss as to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for

> > autism i mean.. but like was said before.. we dont have control over

> > that which is a double wammy when I feel helpless some days to begin

> > with...

> >

> > Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>

> <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote: My

> > husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> > learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

> > what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

> > than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

> > love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

> > help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

> > worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

> > he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> > intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

> > the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> > Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

> > are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

> > to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

> > things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

> > person as he grows.

> >

>

>

[Guest guest]

It's got me worried -- he was quieter this morning, too, and I'm curious

what his teachers say when I pick him up. They thought he was just

getting over being sick (he was hospitalized right before Christmas) but

he was talkative all last week and the verbal decrease didn't start

until Monday morning.

wrote:

>

> That typically means something is bothering him or happened and he

> can't or doesn't know how to verbalize it. Watch for clues and

> figure the mystery out or it won't get better. I noted that early on

> with my kids.

>

>

> My

> > > husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> > > learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is

> verbal and

> > > what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very

> different for us

> > > than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child

> say " I

> > > love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would

> probably

> > > help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but

> we're

> > > worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with

> me when

> > > he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> > > intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the

> innocence,

> > > the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> > > Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school

> because they

> > > are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I

> don't want

> > > to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with

> the other

> > > things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a

> functioning

> > > person as he grows.

> > >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

yes, they do grow back. My son is proof. fist time taken out was at age 3.

2nd time was at age 4. His ped. Dr. thinks they grew back again at almost 10

years old. but not sure because you need an x-ray to see them. or a tube down

the nose. the main reason why I had it done at 3 was because his croup cough

spasm's was so bad, he coughed so hard he spit up blood. the ENT said they were

so hugh they interfered with his breathing. and I could tell while he was

sleeping, It interrupted his sleep. when they were taken out, all systems got

better, including his sleeping. I started to noticed the systems again just

before he turned 4. back to the ENT. yes, they grew back. Dr. told me this is

very rare that they grow back but they do. He had them taken out at 4 years old

because the ENT said they were to huge for him???? (again), they said that the

first time too.). He slept very well, no coughing either. but now, I'm

noticing the systems again at almost 10. but they

are not that bad for me to x-ray him. but I can see us going in that direction

again. Oh, just the adenoids grew back.

speak to your sons ENT, ask him about them growing back... I couldn't believe

it either....

It was worth us taking them out. I was so glad to see him have a good nights

sleep...*smile

HEATHER BEEM <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote:

WHAT?!?!?! THEY GROW BACK?? I didnt know that...are you serious??

Rose <beachbodytan2002@...> Hello ,

we had that same problem with sleep. long story short, we had to do the same

thing and at 3years old too. take out his adenoids & tonsils. this was great, he

slept very well and no snoring or coughing. yeah!!! this went well until he was

almost 4 years old. I noticed the loud snoring, coughing and loss of sleep - all

over again. I took him to another ENT (we moved) and he said - wooow, his

adenoids and tonsils are so Hugh, they have to come out now. I said they were

taken out last year. OMG!! the x-rays showed they grew back. so, we had them

taken out again. a 2nd time within one year. My son is now 10, and I'm starting

to see the signs again, (very little right now) the snoring, coughing??? I was

told this is very rare that they grow back. But his sleeping was a Hugh

improvement when they removed his adenoids and tonsils.

best wishes for you and your son. Hugs.

HEATHER BEEM <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote:

we talked to his dr about agression impulse control etc..(our dr is

UNDEReducated about characteristics of autism) and asked for a sleep study. alex

rairly sleeps more than 5 hours at a time and wakes up often and doesnt nap

despite my insisting he be on a schedule. our dr gave us sleep medicine.. no

change at all. i know when he's tired he has less control and is very

contrary.we went to ENT and were told that his adnoids and tonsils were the size

of an adult.. and alex is just three! needless to say they are removing them,

hopefully helping him to sleep and reducing his overtired behavior. im praaying

it makes a difference. if not, i dont know whatelse to do!! GRR!

do you think the medicine is making him act differently? i hate medicine... its

usually a trade off. one thing gets better but the meds cause some other thing..

i read about the holisitc approach all the time.. i just dont know enough about

it to try it with alex. i hope itdoesnt get to the point where alex is on meds.

that scares me.

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote:

He just turned six. Behavioral therapy weekly has helped, but he's still

got a ways to go -- we get one thing a little better, and something else

crops up. Ds has major control issues, too.

The last couple of days he's not nearly as verbal as normal, even his

teachers have noticed it. It worries me a little and it's something I'm

definitely watching.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at

> a loss as to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for

> autism i mean.. but like was said before.. we dont have control over

> that which is a double wammy when I feel helpless some days to begin

> with...

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote: My

> husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

> what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

> than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

> love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

> help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

> worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

> he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

> the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

> are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

> to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

> things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

> person as he grows.

>

[Guest guest]

If tonsils are removed properly they will not grow back, but adenoids will grow

back. Mine did.

Re: ( ) Re:Autism Cure, huh?

WHAT?!?!?! THEY GROW BACK?? I didnt know that...are you serious??

Rose <beachbodytan2002@...> Hello ,

we had that same problem with sleep. long story short, we had to do the same

thing and at 3years old too. take out his adenoids & tonsils. this was great, he

slept very well and no snoring or coughing. yeah!!! this went well until he was

almost 4 years old. I noticed the loud snoring, coughing and loss of sleep - all

over again. I took him to another ENT (we moved) and he said - wooow, his

adenoids and tonsils are so Hugh, they have to come out now. I said they were

taken out last year. OMG!! the x-rays showed they grew back. so, we had them

taken out again. a 2nd time within one year. My son is now 10, and I'm starting

to see the signs again, (very little right now) the snoring, coughing??? I was

told this is very rare that they grow back. But his sleeping was a Hugh

improvement when they removed his adenoids and tonsils.

best wishes for you and your son. Hugs.

HEATHER BEEM <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote:

we talked to his dr about agression impulse control etc..(our dr is

UNDEReducated about characteristics of autism) and asked for a sleep study. alex

rairly sleeps more than 5 hours at a time and wakes up often and doesnt nap

despite my insisting he be on a schedule. our dr gave us sleep medicine.. no

change at all. i know when he's tired he has less control and is very

contrary.we went to ENT and were told that his adnoids and tonsils were the size

of an adult.. and alex is just three! needless to say they are removing them,

hopefully helping him to sleep and reducing his overtired behavior. im praaying

it makes a difference. if not, i dont know whatelse to do!! GRR!

do you think the medicine is making him act differently? i hate medicine... its

usually a trade off. one thing gets better but the meds cause some other thing..

i read about the holisitc approach all the time.. i just dont know enough about

it to try it with alex. i hope itdoesnt get to the point where alex is on meds.

that scares me.

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote:

He just turned six. Behavioral therapy weekly has helped, but he's still

got a ways to go -- we get one thing a little better, and something else

crops up. Ds has major control issues, too.

The last couple of days he's not nearly as verbal as normal, even his

teachers have noticed it. It worries me a little and it's something I'm

definitely watching.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at

> a loss as to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for

> autism i mean.. but like was said before.. we dont have control over

> that which is a double wammy when I feel helpless some days to begin

> with...

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote: My

> husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

> what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

> than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

> love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

> help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

> worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

> he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

> the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

> are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

> to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

> things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

> person as he grows.

>

[Guest guest]

My sons tonsils " Thank God " didn't grow back, It was the adnoids that grew back

" hugh " .

<sirdavjohn@...> wrote: If tonsils are removed

properly they will not grow back, but adenoids will grow back. Mine did.

Re: ( ) Re:Autism Cure, huh?

WHAT?!?!?! THEY GROW BACK?? I didnt know that...are you serious??

Rose <beachbodytan2002@...> Hello ,

we had that same problem with sleep. long story short, we had to do the same

thing and at 3years old too. take out his adenoids & tonsils. this was great, he

slept very well and no snoring or coughing. yeah!!! this went well until he was

almost 4 years old. I noticed the loud snoring, coughing and loss of sleep - all

over again. I took him to another ENT (we moved) and he said - wooow, his

adenoids and tonsils are so Hugh, they have to come out now. I said they were

taken out last year. OMG!! the x-rays showed they grew back. so, we had them

taken out again. a 2nd time within one year. My son is now 10, and I'm starting

to see the signs again, (very little right now) the snoring, coughing??? I was

told this is very rare that they grow back. But his sleeping was a Hugh

improvement when they removed his adenoids and tonsils.

best wishes for you and your son. Hugs.

HEATHER BEEM <gypsys_girl_beem@...> wrote:

we talked to his dr about agression impulse control etc..(our dr is

UNDEReducated about characteristics of autism) and asked for a sleep study. alex

rairly sleeps more than 5 hours at a time and wakes up often and doesnt nap

despite my insisting he be on a schedule. our dr gave us sleep medicine.. no

change at all. i know when he's tired he has less control and is very

contrary.we went to ENT and were told that his adnoids and tonsils were the size

of an adult.. and alex is just three! needless to say they are removing them,

hopefully helping him to sleep and reducing his overtired behavior. im praaying

it makes a difference. if not, i dont know whatelse to do!! GRR!

do you think the medicine is making him act differently? i hate medicine... its

usually a trade off. one thing gets better but the meds cause some other thing..

i read about the holisitc approach all the time.. i just dont know enough about

it to try it with alex. i hope itdoesnt get to the point where alex is on meds.

that scares me.

Donna B <donnabzy@...> wrote:

He just turned six. Behavioral therapy weekly has helped, but he's still

got a ways to go -- we get one thing a little better, and something else

crops up. Ds has major control issues, too.

The last couple of days he's not nearly as verbal as normal, even his

teachers have noticed it. It worries me a little and it's something I'm

definitely watching.

HEATHER BEEM wrote:

>

> how old is your son? has issues with agression as well and are at

> a loss as to what to do. if there was a cure out there... great!! for

> autism i mean.. but like was said before.. we dont have control over

> that which is a double wammy when I feel helpless some days to begin

> with...

>

> Donna B <donnabzy@... <mailto:donnabzy%40gmail.com>> wrote: My

> husband and I have discussed this before -- cure? Or helping him

> learn to get along? I'd take the latter. Granted, my son is verbal and

> what many doctors call 'high functioning,' so it's very different for us

> than it would be for a parent who has never heard their child say " I

> love you. " We were offered a medication recently that would probably

> help resolve his aggression and self-injurious behaviors, but we're

> worried what it will do to the rest of him..his sweetness with me when

> he's not mad (which isn't as often as I'd like!), his extreme

> intelligence, his character, the funny things he says, the innocence,

> the lack of concern about what other thinks (he loves to wear Mr.

> Incredibles lounging pants with a Pokemon shirt to school because they

> are his favorites, for example) and other similar things. I don't want

> to change what is *him.* Our goal is to instead help him with the other

> things, and leave his uniqueness as long as he can become a functioning

> person as he grows.

>

[Guest guest]

Totally understand it. I had one of my boys born " dead " also.

Roxanna

( ) Re:Autism Cure, huh?

I wrote that I love my daughter and was just saying that I love my

daughter no matter what. That she does bring me joy. I do think the

world needs to learn acceptance and tolerance. It is a big deal to

have AS and my daughter has mild mr as well. I am aware how hard her

life is going to be and worry every day what will happen when I am

not here to help her. It was not my intention to make light of the

situation. But Lily does bring me joy and does help me see the light

in the little things of life. That was all I was saying. If I

could cure her, I would not hesitate. But I cannot and I have to

accept her as she is and find the joys in who she is or neither of

us would cope well at all. We constantly work on life skills and

social skills and she is doing marvolous compare to when she was in

school. I know she will never be able to live alone, but for now, I

will love and enjoy who she is and what she brings in to my life.

She was born dead, literally..so I have a unique perspective, I am

just blessed she is with us and making such good progress. It's one

day at a time here. Bless you and I hope you understand my POV now.

Personally, while

> > curing my sons autism would be great, it is part of

> > > who he is. Am I the only one who is worried taking about the

> > quirky part

> > > of him would change him?

> > >

> > > Rathswohl

> > > Deaf Services Coordinator

> > > Dayle McIntosh Center

> > > 714 621 3300 x 341 voice

> > > 714 620 8370 fax

> > > mrathswohl@

> > >

> > > NOTICE: This message, together with any attachments is

intended

> > only for

> > > the use of the individual or entity to which it is addressed

and

> > may

> > > contain information that is confidential and prohibited from

> > disclosure.

> > > If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby

notified

> > that any

> > > dissemination or copy reproduction of this message is

strictly

> > > prohibited. If you have received this message in error,

notify

> > the

> > > original sender immediately and delete this message and any

> > attachments

> > > from your computer

> > >

> > > If this communication involves discussion of patient care

issues

> > in the

> > > performance improvement process, it is protected from

discovery

> > by

> > > California Evidence Code 1157 as a confidential medical staff

> > > communication.

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

I don't see disagreeing as " attacking. " I disagree and there is nothing wrong

with that.

Roxanna

( ) Re:Autism Cure, huh?

What I meant about the cure for CF and Tay Sachs is that they are

life threating, and life ending diseases. I don't think there will be

a cure in the near future, and to be totally honest, I am not sure I

would be the first person to jump at it. It would be pretty new and

not fully tested. What if what they consider a cure makes it worse? I

am not putting my child through possible pain and agony when most of

his issues are controlled by either medication or behavioral

modification. I guess because Lucas is very high funtioning, I don't

see his having AS as being limited or disabled. We have worked really

hard to teach him the rules of society and to help him work with

social stories. I never said I was opposed to a cure, just that I am

very unsure about the results for my child. He is truly the most

amazing person I know, and I don't consider him " Broken " so a " Cure "

to " Fix him " is not a priority to me. For me, the priority is getting

through the 4th grade, and dealing with the " girlfriend " problems.

Good lord, I never realized that 9-10 year olds understood that much

about dating or sex! I am sorry that the cure is not my priority. I

obviously must not walk in your shoes...having said that you aren't

in mine. Please, this board is supposed to be a good place, and

attacking one another is not going to help. I respect you opinions,

just they are different then mine.

Thank you,

Personally, while

> > curing my sons autism would be great, it is part of

> > > who he is. Am I the only one who is worried taking about the

> > quirky part

> > > of him would change him?

> > >

> > > Rathswohl

> > > Deaf Services Coordinator

> > > Dayle McIntosh Center

> > > 714 621 3300 x 341 voice

> > > 714 620 8370 fax

> > > mrathswohl@

> > >

> > > NOTICE: This message, together with any attachments is

intended

> > only for

> > > the use of the individual or entity to which it is addressed

> and

> > may

> > > contain information that is confidential and prohibited from

> > disclosure.

> > > If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby

notified

> > that any

> > > dissemination or copy reproduction of this message is strictly

> > > prohibited. If you have received this message in error,

notify

> > the

> > > original sender immediately and delete this message and any

> > attachments

> > > from your computer

> > >

> > > If this communication involves discussion of patient care

> issues

> > in the

> > > performance improvement process, it is protected from

discovery

> > by

> > > California Evidence Code 1157 as a confidential medical staff

> > > communication.

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

Oh Rose, what a good reply to that!

Roxanna

( ) Re:Autism Cure, huh?

>

> Autism is a disability. I am fully aware of the problems my son is

> experiencing and will experience for the rest of his life. It is my

> job as his mother to teach him skills and ways to cope. I however do

> not see my son as " disabled " . A disability only disables you to the

> limit that you let it (or in my son's case, as I let it disable him).

> I work for a Non-profit independent living center, and have to say,

> until I had a chance to work with people who have profound and life

> limiting or changing disabilities, I thought Lucas would be limited,

> but when you work with the woman how can only use a very small part

> of her hand and her mouth, and still she works full time, or the deaf

> blind man who works as a computer progamer, I have learned that

> limiting my dreams for my son would be a disservice to him. He has

> dreams and goals and plans. Maybe if he were nonverbal or severly

> limited by the autism would I want to cure it, but his being autistic

> is why he thinks and talks the way he does. I am not saying a cure it

> bad, but I worry about the concequences. If I could be sure that I

> would be able to cure him, but keep his unique self, then I would

> jump through hoops. But they can't cure Tay Sachs or Cystic Fibrosis

> and I think those require a cure long befor autism. The other thing

> that worries me is, if we have the genetic testing become avalible,

> how many people will terminate pregancies based on the autism

> diagnosis? How can we tell where on the spectrum a child will fall

> before birth? I live with a person with autism every single day, and

> I don't think the autism is a gift, but a part of the person who my

> son is. I guess because I think that he is a gift from God that I

> accept the challanges that the autism brings along with the honest,

> sweet, loving, frustrating, cute, impish little boy that is my whole

> world.

>

> Personally, while

> > curing my sons autism would be great, it is part of

> > > who he is. Am I the only one who is worried taking about the

> > quirky part

> > > of him would change him?

> > >

> > > Rathswohl

> > > Deaf Services Coordinator

> > > Dayle McIntosh Center

> > > 714 621 3300 x 341 voice

> > > 714 620 8370 fax

> > > mrathswohl@

> > >

> > > NOTICE: This message, together with any attachments is intended

> > only for

> > > the use of the individual or entity to which it is addressed

> and

> > may

> > > contain information that is confidential and prohibited from

> > disclosure.

> > > If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified

> > that any

> > > dissemination or copy reproduction of this message is strictly

> > > prohibited. If you have received this message in error, notify

> > the

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[Guest guest]

Please do not think I am offended at all. I thought we were discussing and I

disagreed with you. Now you have explained further and I can see what you meant

to say. But I am not sitting around all upset with anyone. In fact, I had the

flu the past week and am just getting myself back to human again. So trying to

catch up!

I think it's wonderful to accept our kids and love them for all their joys. We

do that anyway - we are parents! There is a culture out there of people who

mostly self-dx'd themselves with autism as adults. Dare you mention " therapy "

or working on any " problem area " and they blast you for messing with perfection.

It's that type of attitude that I am against. I also do not view autism as any

sort of " gift " and I feel my kids gifts are theirs because of who they are and

not because they are autistic. So I don't understand it when people say they

wouldn't " cure " autism because they think the way their kid thinks is cute. Or

whatever they feel autism has gifted their child with. Why is it so hard to

believe that a child has gifts despite autism and not due to autism? Not that

you did that - just that this was the way the thread was going here and why I

popped in to say I disagree. So don't worry - all is well here and I am not

offended.

Roxanna

Re: ( ) Re:Autism Cure, huh?

Well said !!! I totally agree that as much as I would like to see a cause

and cure for autisim and in our case TS as well, I think that it is just as

important for the people around to be cured of their ignorance!!!!!!!! Our

children especially with high functioning or mild TS really wouldn't have much

of a problem in this world if it weren't for society!!!! It is sad when it seems

so simlply fixed if people could just see that they are the

problem!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! People have said to me that they are sorry for

the disorders that Ezra has (although I know they mean well) I am not sorry, he

is who he is, I am just sorry that more people don't understand!!! Thanks,

advocateforaspies <advocateforaspies@...> wrote: A huge portion of the

replies were not bad, in my opinion. It wasn't

anything where someone said that they would not want autism cured,

but this is my POV..... (from what I said and what I read)

The high functioning (aka mild Aspergers, perhaps) kids need to be

understood more than being cured. If the cure comes, that can help

our lower functioning kids or our kids that just can't cope,

fantastic.

As I mentioned, I would like to see a bigger cure of the people

around that don't get A.S. and need to understand it and not be such

jerks (IMHO, though rather harsh Opinion) While we are working on

figuring out what autism is, (and people are working hard on that)

we need to also be focusing on the 'other individuals' that are so

hard on our kids.

Sure we want to cure what is so bad for our kids, but from my

perspective (and I think many others) the higher functioning our

kids, the more we want to work on what is right (not wrong) and we

should find a way to use our kids talents to better the world, or

better anything for that matter. Our bright little kids that may

have some difficulties wouldn't have nearly the difficulties if

those around them would handel them better.

I think I saw a lot that agree with you, Roxanne. We want our kids

that just can't make it in the world (lack of communication with

words, lack of being able to function in society) to be helped and

for someone to find out what is wrong and help them so that things

can be right.

For the rest, we need more of a cure for the folks around them that

can't handle them. (for that matter anyone that can't handle any of

our kids, despite the label.)

I think that will be part of my force in talking to people. We all

need to work on understanding our kids, despite their difficulties.

Find out what is wrong, understand how to work with them, and always

be understanding. After all, I believe it is our mankind (or human

kind. whatever) that has messed up with our kids (chemicals, poor

treatment) and so it needs to be all of us to work together as

a 'team' to make things right....

I hope they do find a cure.... a cure for mans misconceptions, a

cure for the diseases, illness and problems that people don't

understand, and a reason for autism, as well as a way to help our

kids so that when they are born, they can grow the proper way and

not loose what they do loose to autism. Our kids do deserve that,

and I think everyone that posted agrees with that.

*hugs*

B

Personally, while

> curing my sons autism would be great, it is part of

> > who he is. Am I the only one who is worried taking about the

> quirky part

> > of him would change him?

> >

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