Re: bringing a advocate or a lawyer to IEP meetings??

[Guest guest]

One more suggestion--buy, beg or borrow a tape player/digital voice

recorder and use it!

It saves so much grief. You can go back and listen over and over.

Don't remember if you

asked a certain question? Go back and listen! Don't remember if

they said x or what is really y?

Go back and listen. I have some really funny comments recorded,

too. I basically transcribe the

recordings, and made time notations on the copy. When I record, the

school does, too.

Jackie

On Nov 19, 2006, at 11:05 PM, hambonemcgee wrote:

> I find it truly sad that we as parents of these beautiful children

> have

> to bring someone with us to these meetings. I have been through a few

> and I was by myself and let me tell you that the meetings were fine

> until I had a problem with the school and oh boy was that a awful

> meeting. I was in tears and very intimidated by the other 6 people

> that were there. They (the rest of the IEP team) were not nice and

> out

> of line and I had no one there on my side. It was absolutely

> horrible. Where do we go or who do we call for a advocate to go with

> us when these meeting happen? I will never ever go again by myself.

> Since I was alone, when I went to the superintendent to complain he

> said everything I said that happened was hear say. The director of

> the

> public pre-school even got in my face. Who do I call to go with me? I

> live about 10 miles south of Cleveland, Ohio.

> Thanks for any advice I get!

> Heidi

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I got mine in PA through a disability law group. My advocate is a lawyer

who has a son with autism.

Another thing I started doing was bringing a tape recorder, asking

everyone's permission, turning it on and having everyone state who they are

and giving permission once again for the record and taping the whole

meeting. My advocate told me to write a summary of the meeting as I

understood it the day after and sending it to each team member asking them

to verify and respond by mail. Nothing counts unless it's in writing she

tells me. Any requests for another IEP, evaluations for anything, etc

should all be made in writing CC'ing everyone who was at the IEP meeting.

In her son's IEP, she has a line item that they send progress reports

between parents and teachers once a day and they have an IEP update meeting

once a month to go over any issues that have come up.

Getting an advocate is a great step to take. Some advice I was given: Join

a support group. I'm in a group called FEMA- " From Emotions to Advocacy "

(my advocate started the group because she was tired of seeing parents and

children being taken advantage of). There is a book by the same title from

slaw that we use that goes step by step about advocating for your

child and how to go about getting what your child needs in their IEP. If a

school breaks an IEP, it's against the law. So make sure you get everything

in the IEP. My brother (a third grade special ed teacher) says things are

usually left out of the IEP intentionally because most parents don't read it

and sign. Never accept a verbal. DO NOT sign the IEP unless you 100% agree

with it, with all things in writing you were told they would do. You are

entering a legally binding agreement with the school. Finally, as my

brother told me, you wouldn't sign a lease, a car agreement or a mortgage

without making sure everything is in writing and most likely getting legal

council or bringing a friend who knows the pitfalls, an IEP shouldn't be any

different. Make sure you bring back-up to every IEP meeting, including

notes, letters and previous meetings tapes.

Stef

Lancaster, PA

( ) bringing a advocate or a lawyer to IEP

meetings??

I find it truly sad that we as parents of these beautiful children have

to bring someone with us to these meetings. I have been through a few

and I was by myself and let me tell you that the meetings were fine

until I had a problem with the school and oh boy was that a awful

meeting. I was in tears and very intimidated by the other 6 people

that were there. They (the rest of the IEP team) were not nice and out

of line and I had no one there on my side. It was absolutely

horrible. Where do we go or who do we call for a advocate to go with

us when these meeting happen? I will never ever go again by myself.

Since I was alone, when I went to the superintendent to complain he

said everything I said that happened was hear say. The director of the

public pre-school even got in my face. Who do I call to go with me? I

live about 10 miles south of Cleveland, Ohio.

Thanks for any advice I get!

Heidi

[Guest guest]

www.yellowpagesforkids.com has a listing of advocates. Also, some

Unlocking Autism reps will attend IEP meetings. www.UnlockingAutism.org

Look for P2P in the header.

Tonya

( ) bringing a advocate or a lawyer to IEP

meetings??

I find it truly sad that we as parents of these beautiful children have

to bring someone with us to these meetings. I have been through a few

and I was by myself and let me tell you that the meetings were fine

until I had a problem with the school and oh boy was that a awful

meeting. I was in tears and very intimidated by the other 6 people

that were there. They (the rest of the IEP team) were not nice and out

of line and I had no one there on my side. It was absolutely

horrible. Where do we go or who do we call for a advocate to go with

us when these meeting happen? I will never ever go again by myself.

Since I was alone, when I went to the superintendent to complain he

said everything I said that happened was hear say. The director of the

public pre-school even got in my face. Who do I call to go with me? I

live about 10 miles south of Cleveland, Ohio.

Thanks for any advice I get!

Heidi

[Guest guest]

Oh.. One more thing my advocate tells me, NEVER sign an IEP at the meeting.

You are usually emotional with your head spining. You usually don't have

time to completely read over it and not everything discussed is in that

copy. Wait for a formal copy and read it. Reread it. And if you have to,

read it again. Does it matach the tape recording? Ask your advocate how

they think the meeting went and if they have any suggestions or comments

about the IEP. My advocate also has the knowledge of being in on many IEP

meetings with the school district. She knows what other parents are

receiving (can't divulge details). She'll tell me to push on issues based

on previous experience with the district.

The first thing my advocate told me- An advocate is there to help you, but

not do the IEP for you. Above all, you are a specialist in your child, they

are specialists in their field who specnt time with your child. IEP's are

give and take, but you know your child best to know what they need most.

Prioritize and fight for the things that mean the most! If you get

everything, great. But make sure you get what's most important.

Stef

[Guest guest]

When I send back my reply to Notice of CCC Meeting, I write on the top

" I will be recording this meeting. " If, for some reason, I don't get

the Notice

for the meeting before the actual meeting, I make sure to let the

principal

know in advance anyway....so they can dust off their machine, too.

They keep

joking that they have a digital recorder but can't get the data off.

One meeting

they had this recorder that, I kid you not, was the size on a toaster

oven. LOL

Jackie

On Nov 20, 2006, at 9:33 AM, B Price wrote:

>

> Another thing I started doing was bringing a tape recorder, asking

> everyone's permission, turning it on and having everyone state who

> they are

> and giving permission once again for the record and taping the whole

> meeting.

[Guest guest]

Last year ended on a very interesting note. We started a new IEP on

Sept 11. Met for 4.5 hours. Needed another meeting. Had that Oct

6th. Said I still needed another meeting, but signed portions I

agreed with, with written statements about what was lacking or

unclear on Oct. 10th. Met again on Nov. 2nd, and I sent four pages

of requests, clarifications, questions, and such on Nov. 6. We were

going to do the rest by email, as we have met for 8 hours so far.

But we're going to have to meet again, because there are goal issues

to be determined. It's all about the behavior plan and crisis

plan. Because if the behavior plan isn't clear, we are going to

have to use crisis plan way more than we really need to.

Jackie

On Nov 20, 2006, at 9:56 AM, B Price wrote:

> Oh.. One more thing my advocate tells me, NEVER sign an IEP at the

> meeting.

[Guest guest]

Ohio (CPRC)

Special Education Services

27900 Euclid Avenue

Cleveland, OH 44132

216-289-4332

216-289-9091 FAX

Email: _aimeegilman@..._ (mailto:aimeegilman@...)

Call them to get information about what kind of support they can provide.

Pam

[Guest guest]

Hi Heidi,

I'm farther south of Cleveland in Medina. Where do you live? If you want a

lawyer, go to www.nessasiegel.com . It costs, of course, but they won't let you

get bullied.

Also, I say this to everyone - write follow up letters to everything that

happens. This is how you make a paper trail and prove that things were said.

You can also tape record meetings as well. But I agree, never go alone! Even

if you take a neighbor or friend just to take notes for you, you have someone

there.

To find an advocate, go to http://www.ocecd.org/ and look up your area

representative.

Roxanna

( ) bringing a advocate or a lawyer to IEP meetings??

I find it truly sad that we as parents of these beautiful children have

to bring someone with us to these meetings. I have been through a few

and I was by myself and let me tell you that the meetings were fine

until I had a problem with the school and oh boy was that a awful

meeting. I was in tears and very intimidated by the other 6 people

that were there. They (the rest of the IEP team) were not nice and out

of line and I had no one there on my side. It was absolutely

horrible. Where do we go or who do we call for a advocate to go with

us when these meeting happen? I will never ever go again by myself.

Since I was alone, when I went to the superintendent to complain he

said everything I said that happened was hear say. The director of the

public pre-school even got in my face. Who do I call to go with me? I

live about 10 miles south of Cleveland, Ohio.

Thanks for any advice I get!

Heidi

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[Guest guest]

My son attends a social skills therapy group every week. This same

phycololist does and evaluation every year. He or his assistant has

come with me the last couple of years of years (of course I've had to

pay them $240 for it. The is also the Ohio Coalition for the

Education of Children with Disabilities. They have parent mentors in

some school districts. Other's they have an advocate the the each

county. Their web site is ocecd.org. I just emailed them about

something and they got back the next day.

>

> I find it truly sad that we as parents of these beautiful children

have

> to bring someone with us to these meetings. I have been through a

few

> and I was by myself and let me tell you that the meetings were fine

> until I had a problem with the school and oh boy was that a awful

> meeting. I was in tears and very intimidated by the other 6 people

> that were there. They (the rest of the IEP team) were not nice and

out

> of line and I had no one there on my side. It was absolutely

> horrible. Where do we go or who do we call for a advocate to go

with

> us when these meeting happen? I will never ever go again by

myself.

> Since I was alone, when I went to the superintendent to complain he

> said everything I said that happened was hear say. The director of

the

> public pre-school even got in my face. Who do I call to go with

me? I

> live about 10 miles south of Cleveland, Ohio.

> Thanks for any advice I get!

> Heidi

>

[Guest guest]

One of the best advocates I have ever met was the mom of a child with downs

syndrome who took it upon herself to insist that her daughter's school district

offered top quality inclusive settings to children with special needs. After

doing it alone for 15 years or so until eventually getting her daughter into the

local community college with supports, she began helping other families in her

district and I believe now advocates professionally.

The reason I bring this up is that if I was a parent of a child with a

disability starting the IEP process with a lack of funds or professionals

available to me, I would try to access other parents who have gone before me in

my local school and district. Every district special ed. department has that

one parent or two whose name strikes fear into the entire staff. If they truly

strike fear, it is not that they are crazy, unreasonable, or dangerous. (Those

parents are easily written off). The ones that strike fear are the ones who are

organized, prepared, know their rights, and are capable of getting done what

needs to get done. As a young parent, finding those local parents and enlisting

their help can offer a world of help.

As I write this, I see myself eliciting the following question...How do you find

these parents?

Here are a few thoughts off the top of my head:

Ask the school staff for the names of any local suppport groups,

google search autism and your school district or community name,

ask to visit some inclusive or integrative classrooms for children older than

yours. Then when you see children getting the kind of service you would like to

see for your child in the future, (possibly good one-to-one help in an inclusive

setting) find out who those parents are.

I am sure, many educators would prefer I do not share this but meaningful change

(almost) never happens from within in the public schools. It is (almost) always

created from outside pressure. Normally that pressure begins with one parent

who believes that nothing is too much to expect if it means equality for a

child. That one parent becomes a group of parents who become a voting block who

work to get the forward thinkers into power positions and the system changes

from there. Until this happens, even top quality forward thinking teachers who

fight the system are often stifled, repremanded, or forced out.

At the risk of being blasted for mentioning my book, (I'm sorry it just seems

silly to keep writing some of the same things over and over when they have

already been published). Chapter 18 is called " Seperate is never Equal: ABA/VB

and the public school system. In it there is a relevent statement that is as

unfortunate as it is true.

" Prepare for the fact that your job of educating your child with autism does not

end when he begins school. In fact, that is often when your job of educating

your school begins " (253).

For those of you who have found an open and willing, teacher, school, or

district, be sure to reinforce them with written letters of praise, support,

cookies and a careful respect for their time as these placements and people are

not as easy to find as you might think.

FYI, please remember, I am just offering an opinion, if anyone disagrees with me

on anything, please feel free to say so but hopefully you can do it without

trying to make me feel like a bad person for trying to help. Thanks.

_______________________

Schramm, MA, BCBA

www.lulu.com/knospe-aba

www.knospe-aba.de

________________________

( ) bringing a advocate or a lawyer to IEP meetings??

I find it truly sad that we as parents of these beautiful children have

to bring someone with us to these meetings. I have been through a few

and I was by myself and let me tell you that the meetings were fine

until I had a problem with the school and oh boy was that a awful

meeting. I was in tears and very intimidated by the other 6 people

that were there. They (the rest of the IEP team) were not nice and out

of line and I had no one there on my side. It was absolutely

horrible. Where do we go or who do we call for a advocate to go with

us when these meeting happen? I will never ever go again by myself.

Since I was alone, when I went to the superintendent to complain he

said everything I said that happened was hear say. The director of the

public pre-school even got in my face. Who do I call to go with me? I

live about 10 miles south of Cleveland, Ohio.

Thanks for any advice I get!

Heidi

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -

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Checked by AVG Free Edition.

Version: 7.1.409 / Virus Database: 268.14.10/541 - Release Date: 11/20/2006

[Guest guest]

I've seen the difference a good staff person makes in a child. We had

horrible years in elementary and are blossoming now due to one person's

assistance. What said can't be stressed enough. When you find

that good person, make them feel valued!!

Tonya

Re: ( ) bringing a advocate or a lawyer to IEP

meetings??

One of the best advocates I have ever met was the mom of a child with

downs syndrome who took it upon herself to insist that her daughter's

school district offered top quality inclusive settings to children with

special needs. After doing it alone for 15 years or so until eventually

getting her daughter into the local community college with supports, she

began helping other families in her district and I believe now advocates

professionally.

The reason I bring this up is that if I was a parent of a child with a

disability starting the IEP process with a lack of funds or

professionals available to me, I would try to access other parents who

have gone before me in my local school and district. Every district

special ed. department has that one parent or two whose name strikes

fear into the entire staff. If they truly strike fear, it is not that

they are crazy, unreasonable, or dangerous. (Those parents are easily

written off). The ones that strike fear are the ones who are organized,

prepared, know their rights, and are capable of getting done what needs

to get done. As a young parent, finding those local parents and

enlisting their help can offer a world of help.

As I write this, I see myself eliciting the following question...How do

you find these parents?

Here are a few thoughts off the top of my head:

Ask the school staff for the names of any local suppport groups,

google search autism and your school district or community name,

ask to visit some inclusive or integrative classrooms for children older

than yours. Then when you see children getting the kind of service you

would like to see for your child in the future, (possibly good

one-to-one help in an inclusive setting) find out who those parents are.

I am sure, many educators would prefer I do not share this but

meaningful change (almost) never happens from within in the public

schools. It is (almost) always created from outside pressure. Normally

that pressure begins with one parent who believes that nothing is too

much to expect if it means equality for a child. That one parent becomes

a group of parents who become a voting block who work to get the forward

thinkers into power positions and the system changes from there. Until

this happens, even top quality forward thinking teachers who fight the

system are often stifled, repremanded, or forced out.

At the risk of being blasted for mentioning my book, (I'm sorry it just

seems silly to keep writing some of the same things over and over when

they have already been published). Chapter 18 is called " Seperate is

never Equal: ABA/VB and the public school system. In it there is a

relevent statement that is as unfortunate as it is true.

" Prepare for the fact that your job of educating your child with autism

does not end when he begins school. In fact, that is often when your job

of educating your school begins " (253).

For those of you who have found an open and willing, teacher, school, or

district, be sure to reinforce them with written letters of praise,

support, cookies and a careful respect for their time as these

placements and people are not as easy to find as you might think.

FYI, please remember, I am just offering an opinion, if anyone disagrees

with me on anything, please feel free to say so but hopefully you can do

it without trying to make me feel like a bad person for trying to help.

Thanks.

_______________________

Schramm, MA, BCBA

www.lulu.com/knospe-aba

www.knospe-aba.de

________________________

( ) bringing a advocate or a lawyer to IEP

meetings??

I find it truly sad that we as parents of these beautiful children have

to bring someone with us to these meetings. I have been through a few

and I was by myself and let me tell you that the meetings were fine

until I had a problem with the school and oh boy was that a awful

meeting. I was in tears and very intimidated by the other 6 people

that were there. They (the rest of the IEP team) were not nice and out

of line and I had no one there on my side. It was absolutely

horrible. Where do we go or who do we call for a advocate to go with

us when these meeting happen? I will never ever go again by myself.

Since I was alone, when I went to the superintendent to complain he

said everything I said that happened was hear say. The director of the

public pre-school even got in my face. Who do I call to go with me? I

live about 10 miles south of Cleveland, Ohio.

Thanks for any advice I get!

Heidi

------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -

No virus found in this incoming message.

Checked by AVG Free Edition.

Version: 7.1.409 / Virus Database: 268.14.10/541 - Release Date:

11/20/2006

[Guest guest]

<<For those of you who have found an open and willing, teacher, school, or

district, be sure to reinforce them with written letters of praise, support,

cookies and a careful respect for their time as these placements and people are

not as easy to find as you might think.

>>

Great ideas! And also a great reminder when people do find good programs or a

good teacher or therapist - be sure and write letters of thanks and praise. It

means a lot to those people to know they are doing a good job.

Roxanna

Re: ( ) bringing a advocate or a lawyer to IEP

meetings??

One of the best advocates I have ever met was the mom of a child with downs

syndrome who took it upon herself to insist that her daughter's school district

offered top quality inclusive settings to children with special needs. After

doing it alone for 15 years or so until eventually getting her daughter into the

local community college with supports, she began helping other families in her

district and I believe now advocates professionally.

The reason I bring this up is that if I was a parent of a child with a

disability starting the IEP process with a lack of funds or professionals

available to me, I would try to access other parents who have gone before me in

my local school and district. Every district special ed. department has that one

parent or two whose name strikes fear into the entire staff. If they truly

strike fear, it is not that they are crazy, unreasonable, or dangerous. (Those

parents are easily written off). The ones that strike fear are the ones who are

organized, prepared, know their rights, and are capable of getting done what

needs to get done. As a young parent, finding those local parents and enlisting

their help can offer a world of help.

As I write this, I see myself eliciting the following question...How do you

find these parents?

Here are a few thoughts off the top of my head:

Ask the school staff for the names of any local suppport groups,

google search autism and your school district or community name,

ask to visit some inclusive or integrative classrooms for children older than

yours. Then when you see children getting the kind of service you would like to

see for your child in the future, (possibly good one-to-one help in an inclusive

setting) find out who those parents are.

I am sure, many educators would prefer I do not share this but meaningful

change (almost) never happens from within in the public schools. It is (almost)

always created from outside pressure. Normally that pressure begins with one

parent who believes that nothing is too much to expect if it means equality for

a child. That one parent becomes a group of parents who become a voting block

who work to get the forward thinkers into power positions and the system changes

from there. Until this happens, even top quality forward thinking teachers who

fight the system are often stifled, repremanded, or forced out.

At the risk of being blasted for mentioning my book, (I'm sorry it just seems

silly to keep writing some of the same things over and over when they have

already been published). Chapter 18 is called " Seperate is never Equal: ABA/VB

and the public school system. In it there is a relevent statement that is as

unfortunate as it is true.

" Prepare for the fact that your job of educating your child with autism does

not end when he begins school. In fact, that is often when your job of educating

your school begins " (253).

For those of you who have found an open and willing, teacher, school, or

district, be sure to reinforce them with written letters of praise, support,

cookies and a careful respect for their time as these placements and people are

not as easy to find as you might think.

FYI, please remember, I am just offering an opinion, if anyone disagrees with

me on anything, please feel free to say so but hopefully you can do it without

trying to make me feel like a bad person for trying to help. Thanks.

_______________________

Schramm, MA, BCBA

www.lulu.com/knospe-aba

www.knospe-aba.de

________________________

.

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[Guest guest]

--- Roxanna <madideas@...> wrote:

> <<For those of you who have found an open and

> willing, teacher, school, or district, be sure to

> reinforce them with written letters of praise,

> support, cookies and a careful respect for their

> time as these placements and people are not as easy

> to find as you might think.

> >>

>

> Great ideas! And also a great reminder when people

> do find good programs or a good teacher or therapist

> - be sure and write letters of thanks and praise.

> It means a lot to those people to know they are

> doing a good job.

>

> Roxanna

>

;

I have to totally agree with this. Last year was THE

best year ever and I sent a letter to the

principal of the school regarding his team of teachers

and what they meant to him as well as to me. I was

very sincere and very precise in what I wrote. The

principal copied it and gave each teacher on the team

a copy. Every one of them have thanked me for it. At

the beginning of the year when we went to orientation,

he saw some of his teachers from last year and they

still thanked me for the letter. I even went to his

old school (where Casey is now) and his case manager

from last year is friends from his case manager from

6th grade and she had told her about it, and when we

went to Casey's back-to-school night, she mentioned

the letter I'd sent to the school regarding the case

manager. So it went a long way to say something. I

know his case manager last year had also mentioned

that she'd been teaching for over 30 years and she'd

never received such a kind and thoughtful letter.

(We also sent jelly beans for Christmas!)

Melinda