Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 I find it difficult to not explain Ethan's behaviors, but I give way too much information. This summer I am attempting to not disclose the autism diagnosis but did tell the coach that my son was somewhat immature and might cry if his team lost. He wrote back saying that kids Ethan's age typically don't care about who won or lost because they have snacks at the end of the games and the kids care more about those. He dismissed me, but I decided to go with it because perhaps that will be all my son will care about as well so I am not going to color this guy's perception - I am however sending my father to watch every game so that there is an adult to back up Ethan if he has a meltdown. > > > Hello all, > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer sports. My > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance was > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it was not > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; I > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons inattetion > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in as > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and requires > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is this, > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept quiet > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at me > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed not > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone else > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput would > be appriciated. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 > > I find it difficult to not explain Ethan's behaviors, but I give > way too much information. This summer I am attempting to not > disclose the autism diagnosis but did tell the coach that my son was > somewhat immature and might cry if his team lost. He wrote back > saying that kids Ethan's age typically don't care about who won or > lost because they have snacks at the end of the games and the kids > care more about those. He dismissed me, but I decided to go with it > because perhaps that will be all my son will care about as well so I > am not going to color this guy's perception - I am however sending > my father to watch every game so that there is an adult to back up > Ethan if he has a meltdown. > > I explained a little in the beginning about AS (to the coach) during my son's trying to be on the swim team. Then I offered to stay for each practice. After about 1 1/2 weeks of my son just hanging on the ropes of the lanes, the coach came up to me for more information. I told her that he knew how to swim, it was just taking him time to get used to everyone else and to having to swim at a sustained effort. She tried to get me to have him drop out and take lessons. I said no way as he had already taken lessons for two years. She said he would never swim during a meet. I said that I didn't care if he practiced all year and never swam in a meet, he was going to do this (practice with the team each day). The only requirement for the team was to swim one length of the pool which he had done. I then threatened to go to the mayor's office and make a big stink. She backed off and within another week, my son felt comfortable enough to swim the lane without holding on to the ropes. I still had to sit at the end of his lane, though. By the end of the swim year, my son had actually swum in a few swim meets and won a medal for the most improved swimmer. He received an invitation to swim with the team the next year and I received an apology from the coach. However, we didn't swim the next year as ds decided it was too much work. Good luck! C Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 Hello, right now, for you, giving too much information, " must be needed " , You will know when its time to slow down. maybe now is not the time. but as time go on, you will know just the right things to say and when its enough. I would rather say too much, than too little. Now that my son is 9. and everybody knows him so well, " because I said/explained alot. I don't need to say hardly anything anymore. I just tell him. remember your manner's, don't be too silly. etc. I will say this just before I drop him off. LJL <laura6307@...> wrote: I find it difficult to not explain Ethan's behaviors, but I give way too much information. This summer I am attempting to not disclose the autism diagnosis but did tell the coach that my son was somewhat immature and might cry if his team lost. He wrote back saying that kids Ethan's age typically don't care about who won or lost because they have snacks at the end of the games and the kids care more about those. He dismissed me, but I decided to go with it because perhaps that will be all my son will care about as well so I am not going to color this guy's perception - I am however sending my father to watch every game so that there is an adult to back up Ethan if he has a meltdown. > > > Hello all, > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer sports. My > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance was > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it was not > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; I > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons inattetion > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in as > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and requires > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is this, > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept quiet > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at me > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed not > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone else > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput would > be appriciated. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 Our son now 19yrs. played baseball, flag football, karate....the only things I mentioned were his asthma and allergies.....at 7yrs. believe me most of the kids playing baseball become inattentive while waiting ea. play...you'll see them squating down playing in the grass throwing it in the air, playing in the dirt....so other then being there for him I wouldn't think it necessary to say anything other then allergies or asthma....most people don't even know what AS is. We were there whenever our son did a sport, and I monitored his social interaction, and then would go over anything that might be helpfull to him, or work with his questions. We just let him enjoy...he couldn't play high school football, or run track, because of his asthma...the coaches really wanted him, because he was such a hard worker to achieve. God Bless Connie T. > > > Hello all, > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer sports. My > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance was > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it was not > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; I > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons inattetion > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in as > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and requires > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is this, > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept quiet > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at me > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed not > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone else > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput would > be appriciated. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 I have a 7-year-old aspie son too, whom I've never signed up for sports, except the Little Gym -- he couldn't/wouldn't have done it. I tried skating once and swimming classes once (with the same information dilemma) but he just wouldn't pay attention. Now I think he might be ready and this exchange is useful -- I've been wondering if he's too behind already skill-wise, but this email from Connie suggests maybe they're all still beginners at 7? That would be a relief. Should I just sign him up and see how it goes, coach him extra if he needs it? R. korea_48446 <korea_48446@...> wrote: Our son now 19yrs. played baseball, flag football, karate....the only things I mentioned were his asthma and allergies.....at 7yrs. believe me most of the kids playing baseball become inattentive while waiting ea. play...you'll see them squating down playing in the grass throwing it in the air, playing in the dirt....so other then being there for him I wouldn't think it necessary to say anything other then allergies or asthma....most people don't even know what AS is. We were there whenever our son did a sport, and I monitored his social interaction, and then would go over anything that might be helpfull to him, or work with his questions. We just let him enjoy...he couldn't play high school football, or run track, because of his asthma...the coaches really wanted him, because he was such a hard worker to achieve. God Bless Connie T. > > > Hello all, > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer sports. My > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance was > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it was not > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; I > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons inattetion > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in as > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and requires > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is this, > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept quiet > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at me > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed not > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone else > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput would > be appriciated. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 I have been a special Olympics coach and my son went to special Olympics It was a perfect environment as he got older... He was NEVER picked on. Now... How much information is too much? Sometimes as parents we do worry way too much... But I would say " My son has Autism ( or aspergers) don't get into high functioning low functioning.. Etc.. And then say.. " what may appear as misbehavior can mean autism ~ if you have any questions.. Let me know! " -- ( ) Summer Sports: How much information should we give? Hello all, I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer sports. My seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance was fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it was not too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; I thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons inattetion and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in as little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and requires frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is this, How much information is too much information? Should I have kept quiet and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at me and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed not to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone else handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput would be appriciated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 OH yeah.. And having been a coach.. That blank stare could mean.. He/she has gotten a little bit of instruction from EVERY parent there... So far.. And they are like a deer in headlights.. " little jimmy is allergic to bees~ can't have citrus.... .. Is prone to nose bleeds ... Etc etc etc. LOL they are probably terrified LOL -- ( ) Summer Sports: How much information should we give? Hello all, I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer sports. My seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance was fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it was not too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; I thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons inattetion and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in as little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and requires frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is this, How much information is too much information? Should I have kept quiet and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at me and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed not to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone else handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput would be appriciated. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 My son's baseball coach was excellent the past two years he played. He is a neighbor and we felt pretty comfortable telling him about Conor's difficulties. He gave Conor a set # in the lineup because he knew it was freaking him out to be at a different spot every game. We decided not to sign up this year. Conor really loved the idea of being on the team, but was so heightened right from the get go every game, it was just too much for all of us. Pam Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 Janie, I think you're better off giving them the information. If they choose not to listen, that's their problem. At least you tried. Of course, you want to be their to help your son out if tt here is a problem. We had good success witih basketball one season for when he was 8 -- the coach had a son with special needs. The followiing year, he had a very competitive coach who was HORRIBLE,, and didn't listen to one word I said. We pulled out after three games. Liz On May 17, 2006, at 10:57 PM, janiemop30 wrote: > > Hello all, > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer > sports. My > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance was > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it > was not > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; I > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons inattetion > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in as > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and > requires > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is > this, > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept quiet > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at me > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed not > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone else > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput would > be appriciated. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 Hello , I would definatly concider signing your son up. Bowling has been great for my son. It has increased his concentration, helped with gross motor, and gave him some sence of acomplishment. He actually won a trophy at the city bowling tournament this year. He came in second place in the handicap division for 11 and under and he is only 7. Depending on the child, I would however be conciderate of the kind of sport I enrolled him in. Some sports have too much stimulation and are meltdowns waiting to happen. Bowling has been a very good experiance for us. We will see about baseball. > > > > > > Hello all, > > > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer > sports. My > > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance > was > > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it > was not > > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; > I > > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons > inattetion > > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in > as > > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and > requires > > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is > this, > > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept > quiet > > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at > me > > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed > not > > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone > else > > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput > would > > be appriciated. > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2006 Report Share Posted May 18, 2006 Thank you Janie! I think bowling is a fantastic idea! I'm going to look into it. Best, janiemop30 <jsilance@...> wrote: Hello , I would definatly concider signing your son up. Bowling has been great for my son. It has increased his concentration, helped with gross motor, and gave him some sence of acomplishment. He actually won a trophy at the city bowling tournament this year. He came in second place in the handicap division for 11 and under and he is only 7. Depending on the child, I would however be conciderate of the kind of sport I enrolled him in. Some sports have too much stimulation and are meltdowns waiting to happen. Bowling has been a very good experiance for us. We will see about baseball. > > > > > > Hello all, > > > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer > sports. My > > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance > was > > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it > was not > > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; > I > > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons > inattetion > > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in > as > > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and > requires > > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is > this, > > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept > quiet > > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at > me > > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed > not > > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone > else > > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput > would > > be appriciated. > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 , this is my first summer of attempting all of this as well. I am really hopeful! I have him signed up for baseball, an Olympic week at a local day camp which will be all day for 4 days, a 2 hour per day one week long basketball camp at another time, a week long all day science camp, and a social camp that is one hour once a week for 7 weeks. I am also going to find some kind of swimming class. I have four kids and have my second son in the same Olympic camp and science camp. I am going to find a camp for my 4 year old daughter as well, but am not sure what it is going to be. Usually, I just like to hang out at home over the summer so this whole drive the kids everywhere is going to be totally new. > > I have a 7-year-old aspie son too, whom I've never signed up for sports, except the Little Gym -- he couldn't/wouldn't have done it. I tried skating once and swimming classes once (with the same information dilemma) but he just wouldn't pay attention. Now I think he might be ready and this exchange is useful -- I've been wondering if he's too behind already skill-wise, but this email from Connie suggests maybe they're all still beginners at 7? That would be a relief. Should I just sign him up and see how it goes, coach him extra if he needs it? > > R. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 Our son starts swimming lessons today. At age 10, he is aware that he has learning differences and at this point does not mind that we share with others knowing it helps him to be understood. This is the note that I wrote and son is going to discretely hand to the instructor: " Hello, you will find that our son is a friendly and eager to please boy. However, he has a learning difference called CAPD - Central Auditory Processing Disorder. " (By the way, in the letter I do not give ALL the details of his diagnosis, such as ADHD because in my opinion, for our child the CAPD is his most challenging concern and the rest need not concern them). " What this means is that he hears your voice, the instructor, the other children and any background noise with the same degree of intensity which makes it difficult for him to concentrate. At times, it is helpful to repeat or rephrase instructions for him to fully understand what is expected of him. Thanks for your patience and if you have any questions please do not hesitate to call me. " In the past when I opted not to provide such a letter, we found that son failed miserably because the instructor assumed that his not following directions was on purpose, but when we did give a background people seem to be more understanding and helpful because they realize that any negative behavior is not willful. -Velvet > > > > > > > > > Hello all, > > > > > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer > > sports. My > > > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > > > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance > > was > > > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it > > was not > > > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; > > I > > > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons > > inattetion > > > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in > > as > > > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and > > requires > > > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is > > this, > > > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept > > quiet > > > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at > > me > > > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed > > not > > > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > > > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone > > else > > > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput > > would > > > be appriciated. > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 I was a special Olympics Bowling Coach.. I love their program ! I know it can be hard to accept your child being in special Olympics..but it is a great program... If mainstream doesn't work well for your child. And if your child is high functioning.. I have found that they can be very compassionate towards children with down syndrome etc.. Its a very accepting environment. -- Re: ( ) Re: Summer Sports: How much information should we give? Thank you Janie! I think bowling is a fantastic idea! I'm going to look into it. Best, janiemop30 <jsilance@...> wrote: Hello , I would definatly concider signing your son up. Bowling has been great for my son. It has increased his concentration, helped with gross motor, and gave him some sence of acomplishment. He actually won a trophy at the city bowling tournament this year. He came in second place in the handicap division for 11 and under and he is only 7. Depending on the child, I would however be conciderate of the kind of sport I enrolled him in. Some sports have too much stimulation and are meltdowns waiting to happen. Bowling has been a very good experiance for us. We will see about baseball. > > > > > > Hello all, > > > > I had a question that has risen in my experiance with summer > sports. My > > seven year old son dx with Aspergers decided that he wanted to play > > summer baseball. Today was their first practice and the experiance > was > > fairly good. It only lasted 15 minutes due to rain therefore, it > was not > > too difficault for him to stay on task. Anyway, my problem is this; > I > > thoughtfully decided to tell the coaching staff of my sons > inattetion > > and listening problems. I easily tried to discribe his situation in > as > > little words as possible. I suggested that he has problems and > requires > > frequent prompting in order to maintain attention. My question is > this, > > How much information is too much information? Should I have kept > quiet > > and let the situation develop? The coaching staff simply looked at > me > > and basically I go no reply. They ask no questions and they seemed > not > > to care. My son has participated in bowling for two years and I have > > never disclosed his disability. I was just wondering how everyone > else > > handles this situation and if I totally botched it up? Any imput > would > > be appriciated. > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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