Re: How can I make leaving him at school easier for him to handle?

January 6, 2006

I can understand how you feel. It would be a good idea to ask the teachers how

long he is upset after you leave just so you know.

I'm not sure if these ideas would work with a child with AS or not, but here

they go:

You might try to find a book called The Kissing Hand. It is a wonderful

children's book about this type of thing. You can read it to him and then

follow the action in the book.

What about giving him something to remember you by while you are apart - a

small picture, a sticker, one of those rubber bracelets, a smiley face drawn on

his hand, a special blanket - whatever you think would help him calm down and

remember that you are going to pick him up soon.

You might ask the teachers if something has changed at school to cause this

changed reaction in him. Has there been a change in schedule or routine, new

teacher, new student in the class - anything that might cause him to change his

behaviors since he did so well before.

Maybe the teacher could give him a " special job " to do each morning. He could

change the calendar, put something special up on the wall or board, help the

teacher with something. Not only could this distract him but it might give him

something to look forward to or make him feel " big " because he has a job.

Just some ideas. I hope something works soon because I know it is hard on you

each morning.

Janice

Leighanne Ratliff <a_cute_tx_cowgirl@...> wrote:

It's me again guys LOL. started going to Head start in August of 2205.

When we first started going, he would cry, scream, clutch onto me, wouldn't want

me to put him down and would try to leave with me. Then he got to where he would

walk into the class room all by himself and if I did have to carry him in, he'd

let me put him down and then he could easily be distracted and he would wave bye

and I could leave him without any problems. Now, it's back to the way it was

when we first started taking him, probably worse now though. He screams, crys,

will not let me put him on the ground, clutches onto me for dear life, will not

even look at his teachers. I can not distract him in any way now. It usually

takes the teacher holding him kicking and screaming and crying just so that I

can leave. I'm not sure how long this lasts after I leave. I'm going to ask when

I go to pick him up this afternoon. When I go to pick him up, he is more than

ready to leave and is practically pulling me

out the door. How can I make leaving him at school in the mornings less of a

heartache and more enjoyable for him? It kills me every morning we have to take

him because I know we will be going through this. It breaks my heart to see him

like that when I leave. Thanks again everyone.

Leighanne

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January 6, 2006

Hi Leighanne,

I had the same problem when I worked in NYC and had to leave my kids with a

home daycare sitter to go to work. I do know the feeling you are going through.

You are probably already doing this. but, when you drop him off at Head Start.

you have to be strong and show nothing is wrong, even with him crying. as hard

as it is, smile, tell him you love him and will come back for him at (?time).

later today. Maybe have some photo's of you, a pet, family members, his home.

Maybe some fun things he did in the photo's. leave them with him. Maybe before

you leave in the morning, let him help you pack his things that he wants to take

to head start. (toys) When you get to head start make it short and go. I was

told the longer I stayed when my child cried, the harder it was for them and me.

with Hugs too, one good hug, kiss & go. (assuming, no one is causing him to

cry). When you leave, is there a window you can look in? or a door window you

can peek into? just to ease your mind.

to see if he did stop crying & starting to interact with someone or something?

(toys, blocks). as soon as you leave, call, ask how he's doing. maybe an hour

later call again, ask how is he doing. if he's still crying, I would go get

him. While he started clutching to you again. to avoid that. Can someone

from head start come meet with you at the car and they take him out from his car

seat, instead of you?. If you already tried all of this. Maybe you might want

to stay one day and see how all the children play. including your son. best

wishes. I hope things all work out. It was very hard for me too. I hated

leaving my children crying, I didn't want to leave them in the first place.

and when they cried, I felt even worse! it stayed with me until I went and

picked them up. I eventually had to change their day care. - Rose