Re: Two Sons with AS

August 11, 2006

Dawn, I also have two sons ages 15 and 9. They are both on the Autism

Spectrum. My older son is 15 and clearly Asperger's. My younger son presents

more like High Functioning Autism. My older son is very social and generally

appropriate, but rigid and opinionated. My younger son is much more flexible,

loving and really worries (anxiety disorder) about everything. Pam

August 11, 2006

In a message dated 8/11/2006 10:12:16 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

blroy1@... writes:

So what is the difference between AS and high functioning Autism?

Barb

Apparently HFA has a clear speech delay and AS does not. Pam

August 11, 2006

In a message dated 8/11/2006 10:29:11 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

tstak2@... writes:

Are autistic kids also lower grade level academically and Aspergers

right at or above grade level?? I was told that is a difference too,

but the parents here would know best.

I have not found that to be the case. HFA and AS kids can be above grade

level and below level academically. Again, it is a spectrum disorder and

things can vary widely. Pam

August 11, 2006

Hi Dawn, I can understand how you feel. My 7 year old

son has AS and we are starting to wonder if his 3 year

old brother has it too. I can barely handle one w/AS,

but 2? I see so many in this group w/more than one or

other different types of situations and I wonder how

the heck they do it! I think, ok, at least one of my

boys will be fine, but then I see how is and I

hafto wonder...Keeping my fingers crossed, but just

wanted to let you know I understand what you are

saying.

--- dscheppke <dscheppke@...> wrote:

> Hello to all--

> Just got a second diagnosis for AS with my youngest

> son. I could

> really see it in my oldest son, because he is not an

> empathetic

> person and never did really understand hugging and

> kissing, but my

> youngest is such a sweetheart and is always giving

> me " love " . But I

> guess he has enough other social issues and fine

> motor concerns

> going on that they figure he " qualifies " to be

> diagnosed with AS,

> also. I am so discouraged. I had the thought in my

> head that at

> least it was only one of my boys, or " I can handle

> one of them

> having it " but now the thought of two of the three

> having it is so

> overwhelming.

> My oldest son is now 15 and we have seen some

> progress with him this

> past year as far as socially and having some

> understanding of how

> other people are feeling. We even got him to start

> football this

> year and he has gone four days now, and seems to be

> willing to keep

> with it. He is a computer game addict and does not

> do much

> socializing so it means a lot to us that he gets out

> and gets some

> positive strokes from other boys-they seem to have a

> very good way

> of getting the older boys to mentor the younger ones

> and it makes

> him feel a part of something. And as I am sure you

> understand, he

> has SOMETHING OTHER than his video games to talk

> about which is a

> welcome treat!! Just wondering if there are any

> other parents out

> there with 2 (or more) Aspies and how it is going

> for you? My

> youngest son just turned 10. I love them very much,

> sometimes I wish

> that I didn't have so many challenges in my life. I

> am sure that

> many of you can understand this much better than

> parents of

> neurotypical children can.

>

> Dawn

>

__________________________________________________

August 11, 2006

Hi Dawn! I have twin 17 yo with aspergers and other issues

(OCD, depression,anxiety all the 'fun' things that go with

aspergers). I totally understand the computer addicts. Both

my boys are computer/video game addicts. When they start

telling me about their games it sounds like a foreign

language to me. I feel like my eyes are glazing over, but

that is pretty much all they talk about in great detail. I

know it is hard! Be thankful and proud that your 15 yo is

playing football, that is wonderful. My kids only go outside

to 'get in the car'. <G> I don't have any other children, so

all I *know* is aspergers... My 17 yo are very affectionate

to my dh and me. We get wonderful bearhugs and " I love you "

all the time. That is a treat, but as far as being

empathetic they are to a certain extent, if say I have a

migraine( they have them so they know how bad they are),

they are empathetic. But other ways they are SO NOT!

I get totally overwhelmed sometimes as everything is a

battle. Getting one of my sons to go anywhere besides school

and church is nearly impossible. Even his dr. (whom he

loves). I have to try and remember that I could be dealing

with them drinking and driving, having sex, girlfriend

drama, and other NT teenage 'problems' so I try and count my

blessings... It's hard , I know. But vent all you need to

here. Everyone is very understanding and empathetic.

One of my boys failed 11th grade (one class short) so now

I have to deal with one twin being a senior in a small

private school and one a junior (AGAIN).... Toni

> Hello to all--

> Just got a second diagnosis for AS with my youngest son.

> I could really see it in my oldest son, because he is not

> an empathetic person and never did really understand

> hugging and kissing, but my youngest is such a sweetheart

> and is always giving me " love " . But I guess he has

> enough other social issues and fine motor concerns going

> on that they figure he " qualifies " to be diagnosed with AS

> , also. I am so discouraged. I had the thought in my

> head that at least it was only one of my boys, or " I can

> handle one of them having it " but now the thought of two

> of the three having it is so overwhelming.

> My oldest son is now 15 and we have seen some progress

> with him this past year as far as socially and having

> some understanding of how other people are feeling. We

> even got him to start football this year and he has gone

> four days now, and seems to be willing to keep with it.

> He is a computer game addict and does not do much

> socializing so it means a lot to us that he gets out and

> gets some positive strokes from other boys-they seem to

> have a very good way of getting the older boys to mentor

> the younger ones and it makes him feel a part of

> something. And as I am sure you understand, he has

> SOMETHING OTHER than his video games to talk about which

> is a welcome treat!! Just wondering if there are any

> other parents out there with 2 (or more) Aspies and how

> it is going for you? My youngest son just turned 10. I

> love them very much, sometimes I wish that I didn't have

> so many challenges in my life. I am sure that many of

> you can understand this much better than parents of

> neurotypical children can.

>

> Dawn

>

I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy

today. I can CHOOSE which it shall be. Groucho Marx

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August 11, 2006

So what is the difference between AS and high functioning Autism?

Barb

Re: ( ) Two Sons with AS

Dawn, I also have two sons ages 15 and 9. They are both on the Autism

Spectrum. My older son is 15 and clearly Asperger's. My younger son presents

more like High Functioning Autism. My older son is very social and generally

appropriate, but rigid and opinionated. My younger son is much more flexible,

loving and really worries (anxiety disorder) about everything. Pam

August 11, 2006

I have two boys with AS and they say my daughter possibly has PDD(NOS) My sons

are 2 and 5 and my daughter is 6. I have one other daughter who is 3 and so far

she is fine. It makes for a very hectic and chaotic household. But we just

deal with one day at a time. They say it is hereditary. So I guess we just

wonder if either of us have it.

Swent

<randimarlene@...> wrote:

Hi Dawn, I can understand how you feel. My 7 year old

son has AS and we are starting to wonder if his 3 year

old brother has it too. I can barely handle one w/AS,

but 2? I see so many in this group w/more than one or

other different types of situations and I wonder how

the heck they do it! I think, ok, at least one of my

boys will be fine, but then I see how is and I

hafto wonder...Keeping my fingers crossed, but just

wanted to let you know I understand what you are

saying.

--- dscheppke <dscheppke@...> wrote:

> Hello to all--

> Just got a second diagnosis for AS with my youngest

> son. I could

> really see it in my oldest son, because he is not an

> empathetic

> person and never did really understand hugging and

> kissing, but my

> youngest is such a sweetheart and is always giving

> me " love " . But I

> guess he has enough other social issues and fine

> motor concerns

> going on that they figure he " qualifies " to be

> diagnosed with AS,

> also. I am so discouraged. I had the thought in my

> head that at

> least it was only one of my boys, or " I can handle

> one of them

> having it " but now the thought of two of the three

> having it is so

> overwhelming.

> My oldest son is now 15 and we have seen some

> progress with him this

> past year as far as socially and having some

> understanding of how

> other people are feeling. We even got him to start

> football this

> year and he has gone four days now, and seems to be

> willing to keep

> with it. He is a computer game addict and does not

> do much

> socializing so it means a lot to us that he gets out

> and gets some

> positive strokes from other boys-they seem to have a

> very good way

> of getting the older boys to mentor the younger ones

> and it makes

> him feel a part of something. And as I am sure you

> understand, he

> has SOMETHING OTHER than his video games to talk

> about which is a

> welcome treat!! Just wondering if there are any

> other parents out

> there with 2 (or more) Aspies and how it is going

> for you? My

> youngest son just turned 10. I love them very much,

> sometimes I wish

> that I didn't have so many challenges in my life. I

> am sure that

> many of you can understand this much better than

> parents of

> neurotypical children can.

>

> Dawn

>

__________________________________________________

August 11, 2006

My father and my mother in law seem to have it. My

husband and I have marvelled at their odd collections

of tools, parts and electronics for my dad, and

cooking pans, books, supplies, arts and crafts etc for

my MIL, not to mention both of their anti social

behaviors. We always said they should marry cuz they

seem perfect together, both depressed and miserable

w/all their " stuff " and not wanting to be part of much

of anything. They both also show their love in

material things, like the biggest Christmas ever and

stuff like that. No doubt in my mind that my first

born was doomed cuz it's from both sides of our

families.

--- Swent <angelbaby_girl1974@...> wrote:

" They say it is hereditary. So I

> guess we just wonder if either of us have it. "

>

> Swent

>

> <randimarlene@...> wrote:

> Hi Dawn, I can understand how you feel. My

> 7 year old

> son has AS and we are starting to wonder if his 3

> year

> old brother has it too. I can barely handle one

> w/AS,

> but 2? I see so many in this group w/more than one

> or

> other different types of situations and I wonder how

> the heck they do it! I think, ok, at least one of my

> boys will be fine, but then I see how is and

> I

> hafto wonder...Keeping my fingers crossed, but just

> wanted to let you know I understand what you are

> saying.

>

> --- dscheppke <dscheppke@...> wrote:

>

> > Hello to all--

> > Just got a second diagnosis for AS with my

> youngest

> > son. I could

> > really see it in my oldest son, because he is not

> an

> > empathetic

> > person and never did really understand hugging and

> > kissing, but my

> > youngest is such a sweetheart and is always giving

> > me " love " . But I

> > guess he has enough other social issues and fine

> > motor concerns

> > going on that they figure he " qualifies " to be

> > diagnosed with AS,

> > also. I am so discouraged. I had the thought in my

> > head that at

> > least it was only one of my boys, or " I can handle

> > one of them

> > having it " but now the thought of two of the three

> > having it is so

> > overwhelming.

> > My oldest son is now 15 and we have seen some

> > progress with him this

> > past year as far as socially and having some

> > understanding of how

> > other people are feeling. We even got him to start

> > football this

> > year and he has gone four days now, and seems to

> be

> > willing to keep

> > with it. He is a computer game addict and does not

> > do much

> > socializing so it means a lot to us that he gets

> out

> > and gets some

> > positive strokes from other boys-they seem to have

> a

> > very good way

> > of getting the older boys to mentor the younger

> ones

> > and it makes

> > him feel a part of something. And as I am sure you

> > understand, he

> > has SOMETHING OTHER than his video games to talk

> > about which is a

> > welcome treat!! Just wondering if there are any

> > other parents out

> > there with 2 (or more) Aspies and how it is going

> > for you? My

> > youngest son just turned 10. I love them very

> much,

> > sometimes I wish

> > that I didn't have so many challenges in my life.

> I

> > am sure that

> > many of you can understand this much better than

> > parents of

> > neurotypical children can.

> >

> > Dawn

> >

>

> __________________________________________________

>

August 11, 2006

Are autistic kids also lower grade level academically and Aspergers

right at or above grade level?? I was told that is a difference too,

but the parents here would know best.

>

> In a message dated 8/11/2006 10:12:16 AM Eastern Daylight Time,

> blroy1@... writes:

>

> So what is the difference between AS and high functioning Autism?

> Barb

>

> Apparently HFA has a clear speech delay and AS does not. Pam

>

August 11, 2006

Hi Dawn,

Yes, I have 3 boys with A.S. (one is 13, one is 11 and one is 9)

My oldest is a gamer. He is hard to deter from games, and he does

talk about some other stuff occasoinally, but basically it is all

game talk right now.

My 11 year old is an absolute angel. He is the one 'you want to take

places' because he just knows the script of how to behave and appear

NT. He does a great job, but there are times when I know we are push

ing it and we need to leave before he shows his " real side! "

My 9 year old is ALL OVER The place. He is full of energy and gets

frustrated very easily. HE takes almost everything literally. Don't

say " Walmart stuff is cheap junk and breaks after a day! " because he

will get into an uproar because not everything we have gotten at

walmart is cheap junk.

Things are crazy in our household, but I have in home support that

is helping us to function better as a family unit.

My husband is a big focus of our stress. Our kids are a bit messy

and don't do well in social situations.

It is very challenging, but remember that your son that just got

diagnosed is the same child he was before he got the diagnosis.

Just because he has the same diagnosis doesn't mean you will have

the same problems. I think there are plus factors with our kids and

he sounds like he just might have a bunch of those!

Yes, I wish they didn't have so many challenges, but those

challenges made me grow up and discover my own, so it isn't so bad

for me in the end!

In the end, you will know so much about A.S. you will be able to

advocate for many people hopefully, including your kids:)

*smiles*

lisa B

t , " dscheppke " <dscheppke@...> wrote:

>

> welcome treat!! Just wondering if there are any other parents out

> there with 2 (or more) Aspies and how it is going for you? My

> youngest son just turned 10. I love them very much, sometimes I

wish

> that I didn't have so many challenges in my life. I am sure that

> many of you can understand this much better than parents of

> neurotypical children can.

>

> Dawn

>

August 11, 2006

Yes marlene, some of us feel really overwhelmed, but we just do it

because we have to, I guess!

I have always had my 3 boys from day one, and I guess I just got used

to the process in a day by day fashion.

And really, your boys are fine, they just have extra struggles.

Learning as much as we can about A.S. and being aware when they are

young is great. You can avoid the many mistakes that would be made if

you didn't know your child had special needs

HTH

*smiles*

b

>

> Hi Dawn, I can understand how you feel. My 7 year old

> son has AS and we are starting to wonder if his 3 year

> old brother has it too. I can barely handle one w/AS,

> but 2? I see so many in this group w/more than one or

> other different types of situations and I wonder how

> the heck they do it! I think, ok, at least one of my

> boys will be fine, but then I see how is and I

> hafto wonder...Keeping my fingers crossed, but just

> wanted to let you know I understand what you are

> saying.

>

> --- dscheppke

August 11, 2006

In the opinion of Tony Attwood, " The difference between Asperger

Syndrome and High Functioning Autism is the spelling "

I know this might hit a nerve, so I am stating this as MY opinion from

My Experiances:

Autism is a spectrum. Like the rainbow, it runs from one place to

another.

At the left end I place the things like Retts, and Child Hood Disint.

Disorder, and lower functioning Autism. As we move to the right, I see

a 'higher' functioning form of autism. In my eyes, these are the kids

that have an IQ over 70 (or so) These, to me, are the kids that don't

appear really Autistic unless they are in crisis, or they are being

rigid, or having problems. Sometimes even when they are happy they can

show signs. Then, as we move a little higher on the HIGH Functioning

Autism Spectrum, there are some kids that are EXTREMELY difficult to

tell they have any form of autism, again, if they are doing fine, and

feeling well. They may be rigid about many things, and overly

talkative, but they are just better at handeling somethings. These

higher Functioning kids are the ones that can talk and sometimes talk

very well (overly well!) "

So that is it (To me!) Basically I feel HFA has it's own scale, and AS

is at the right end:)

Make sense??

(If I don't sorry about that. It is just my opinion!)

*smiles*

B

>

> So what is the difference between AS and high functioning Autism?

> Barb

>

August 11, 2006

I think you will find a lot of the children on the lower spectrum

definitely having more academic problems, and the higher functioning

kids, and AS, well, it depends on the schooling, the problems they may

have and how much support they have. They (kids with AS and HFA)

definitely have an advantage over the other kids but can have some big

time problems too

>

> Are autistic kids also lower grade level academically and Aspergers

> right at or above grade level?? I was told that is a difference

too,

> but the parents here would know best.

>

August 11, 2006

What is the difference between PPD-NOS and AS? My understanding is they

just missed one thing to qualify them for AS. The School considers PPD-NOS

and AS differently - As is considered part of the autism diagnosis, while

PDD-NOS is not. Go figure - For a kid that is on the boarder it would be

better to be AS. My son was dx as PDD-NOS only because the Dr didn't see 1

aspect, however it was a trait (can't remember now) that he had when he

was younger & off meds FOR SURE. He said he would re-eval. I like the Dr

otherwise, he is good with my son and while he is on meds, he got their

slowly, the Dr tries to be careful not to over med.

Kathy K

toozie@...

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August 11, 2006

Yes, , it does make sense. We have just gotten an AS diagnosis for our

grandson (we are his guardians and he & his father live with us). I suspected

this for about a year or longer but was just waiting for the doctors to catch

up. <s> I've heard it called AS and then high functioning and then heard they

are 2 separate issues. Just wanted to make sure I wasn't calling it something I

shouldn't. Thanks to all who answered my question. Sounds like even the

professionals have different answers on that one.

Barb

( ) Re: Two Sons with AS