Re: Asperger in school

August 7, 2006

Just the thought of homework turns my stomach into

knots! UGH! would have the same spelling homework

(first grade) every week, on Monday he'd come home w/4

nights of homework to do when and in what order he

wished, but to hand in on Friday, some fill in the

blanks, a word search, write the words 3 times each

and then write a 5-7 sentence paragraph w/some of the

sp words. He did ok for a few weeks but the last 3

months of school, the whole neighborhood heard me

trying to get him to do his homework. I ended up not

sending in more than half of it. His report card

reflected a decline in homework too. he would cry,

whine, yell, scream, carry on and just completely melt

down over it. and filled w/empty promises of doing it

in the morning before school cuz he was " too tired " .

Ugh. Homework. Don't get me started. I have high hopes

for this Alphasmart thing his psychologist

recommended.

--- susister98 <susister98@...> wrote:

> How do your children behave in school? I am going

> to have a

> behaviorist in school but we stil have the issuse of

> homework when my

> daughter turns into a monster.

>

__________________________________________________

August 7, 2006

My children are only devils for the ones they love, at school they're

perfect, What is that Alpha Smart that you mentioned, I thought I

remember hearing that come up at our last IEP meeting

August 7, 2006

My son was offered and Alphasmart, he used it for a bit, but I think he

didn't like being different. Writing is sooo frustrating for him, I don't

know why he didn't stay with the alphasmart, I guess finding the keys was

frustrating too. The Alphasmart is a keyboard/mini notepad they can type

into that can be plugged into a printer and what is typed in can be printed.

Kathy K

toozie@...

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August 7, 2006

I am not sure what to think of school right now. The one his is in is

better than public for sure. His last teacher was not familiar with AS but

VERY willing to learn and try things. (he was the one that had the positive

attitude when he was flipped off by my son during the beginning of a

meltdown - at least considering it was SOME form of communication) He has

had a new teacher over summer that sounds like she is more familiar with AS.

But says she can tell that some meltdowns are on purpose (I can't even tell

that) - at least I liked that she stopped sending him home on every

meltdown, he could spend the entire day in timeout, but he was not coming

home. I like this better - last year out of the blue they started sending

him home - I don't see how that could have helped. Anyway - this summer to

make up for meltdowns he had to write essays on different things - he has an

LD in writing - it is his MOST frustrating subject - I don't understand how

that could help. She said she didn't know and would try to work something

out - but I am getting closer to being convinced that no one reads the IEP

stuff and that EVERY time he has a change in staff or teachers we should

have a meeting. TG his case worker for the spec ed kids had an AS son, so

she understands and is on our side.

Kathy K

toozie@...

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August 7, 2006

I am considering getting one of those for my son (he's going into 4th grade).

He's great at typing and he hates writing. They say 4th grade there's so much

more writing which really worries him. But I'm also afraid that he won't like

being different from the other kids or that he'll be made fun of. Kids can be so

mean.

toozie <toozie@...> wrote: My son was offered and Alphasmart, he

used it for a bit, but I think he

didn't like being different. Writing is sooo frustrating for him, I don't

know why he didn't stay with the alphasmart, I guess finding the keys was

frustrating too. The Alphasmart is a keyboard/mini notepad they can type

into that can be plugged into a printer and what is typed in can be printed.

Kathy K

toozie@...

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August 7, 2006

On Aug 7, 2006, at 7:23 PM, toozie wrote:

> Anyway - this summer to

> make up for meltdowns he had to write essays on different things -

> he has an

> LD in writing - it is his MOST frustrating subject - I don't

> understand how

> that could help.

To make up the work time he lost during meltdowns? Or as a punishment/

consequence?

" " but I am getting closer to being convinced that no one reads the IEP

stuff and that EVERY time he has a change in staff or teachers we should

have a meeting. " "

I would sure recommend it.

Jackie

August 7, 2006

--- <randimarlene@...> wrote:

> Just the thought of homework turns my stomach into

> knots! UGH!

I am totally with you on that one! These kids have WAY

TOO MUCH homework nowadays. And with the time my kids

get home, they have little time for little more than

homework. The upper grades barely have a night that

they don't have homework. It just totally isn't

fair-aspie or not!!!

Melinda

August 7, 2006

At the Tony Attwood conference I went to, he said that if your child is doing

homework for more than a half hour, stop the homework, and turn it in with a

note from you explaining that this is how much got done and to please not

penelize him for not completing it. I'm not sure how well this will work but I'm

going to try it when my son starts 4th grade next year. Tony said to explain to

them he'll be more productive in class if he's not going home and spending the

entire time at home doing " class " work. I sure liked his take on home work. That

home should be a place to do home things not class things. Sure would be nice if

the schools looked at it that way!! -

Hall Melinda <mlndhall@...> wrote:

--- <randimarlene@...> wrote:

> Just the thought of homework turns my stomach into

> knots! UGH!

I am totally with you on that one! These kids have WAY

TOO MUCH homework nowadays. And with the time my kids

get home, they have little time for little more than

homework. The upper grades barely have a night that

they don't have homework. It just totally isn't

fair-aspie or not!!!

Melinda

August 7, 2006

--- Essenfeld <lessen@...> wrote:

>

Tony said to explain to them he'll be

> more productive in class if he's not going home and

> spending the entire time at home doing " class " work.

> I sure liked his take on home work. That home should

> be a place to do home things not class things. Sure

> would be nice if the schools looked at it that way!!

> -

That's the thing-getting the schools to see it that

way! At least here, they don't care. They are more

focused on how they look compared to other schools. I

once complained to a teacher in middle school because

my son wasn't able to do his chores (which I feel are

a pretty important part of life), and she looked at me

like I was nuts for wanting him to do chores over his

education. It's ridiculous. It does take him longer

for the most part. It's just awful.

Melinda

August 7, 2006

Oh, this was a problem for my NT daughter as well. In first grade,

they had to write their spelling words a certain number of times

each, then write sentences for each word. She was fit to be tied. She

was bored out of her gourd. Sitting at the kitchen table writing

these stupid words that she'd known since she was 4 didn't please

her. My nephew has even more homework than she did. I really don't

approve. I think their homework should be " Get on the phone and

invite a friend over. Then go play in the park. If you need a

suggestion for a friend, e-mail the teacher. " My daughter loves to

read and write despite all the nasty homework she was given at an

early age - she is writing a novel now, when she is not working!

Liz

On Aug 7, 2006, at 3:16 PM, wrote:

> Just the thought of homework turns my stomach into

> knots! UGH! would have the same spelling homework

> (first grade) every week, on Monday he'd come home w/4

> nights of homework to do when and in what order he

> wished, but to hand in on Friday, some fill in the

> blanks, a word search, write the words 3 times each

> and then write a 5-7 sentence paragraph w/some of the

> sp words. He did ok for a few weeks but the last 3

> months of school, the whole neighborhood heard me

> trying to get him to do his homework. I ended up not

> sending in more than half of it. His report card

> reflected a decline in homework too. he would cry,

> whine, yell, scream, carry on and just completely melt

> down over it. and filled w/empty promises of doing it

> in the morning before school cuz he was " too tired " .

> Ugh. Homework. Don't get me started. I have high hopes

> for this Alphasmart thing his psychologist

> recommended.

>

> --- susister98 <susister98@...> wrote:

>

> > How do your children behave in school? I am going

> > to have a

> > behaviorist in school but we stil have the issuse of

> > homework when my

> > daughter turns into a monster.

> >

>

> __________________________________________________

>

August 7, 2006

My case is similar not Aspergers but HFA. He would often have trouble

in class. The teachers told me they just let him write his lists and

didn't worry about school work at all as long as he was happy. I then

asked them to send whatever he missed home for homework, they said " Oh

that's ok we'll have him make it up sometime, or we wont worry about

it. " (he never had homework this was middle school) Partly because of

this we're homeschooling now, and he's getting work done.

Homeschooling is nice because I can have him do his work when he's in

a good mood.(atleast an ok mood)

August 7, 2006

,

I would call yourself an IEP meeting and write it into his IEP that

he will do no more than half an hour of homework per night. That way,

he's protected. We did this in a last ditch effort to keep my son in

public school. It didn't work, but everybody was willing to make the

effort.

Liz

On Aug 7, 2006, at 5:52 PM, Essenfeld wrote:

> At the Tony Attwood conference I went to, he said that if your

> child is doing homework for more than a half hour, stop the

> homework, and turn it in with a note from you explaining that this

> is how much got done and to please not penelize him for not

> completing it. I'm not sure how well this will work but I'm going

> to try it when my son starts 4th grade next year. Tony said to

> explain to them he'll be more productive in class if he's not going

> home and spending the entire time at home doing " class " work. I

> sure liked his take on home work. That home should be a place to do

> home things not class things. Sure would be nice if the schools

> looked at it that way!! -

>

August 7, 2006

How bad can it get when your child is not in an OK mood? I supplement

with extra work at home and my ds HATES it because its harder than the

public school curriculum even though I give him 3rd grade work and he

is going into 4th. The school doesn't offer a curriculum that

challenges the students enough probably to keep their scores high.

Anyway, he screams and cries and I know he can do it he is just

lazy...So how long is your schoolday at home? It takes over an

hour do to 10 minutes of work

August 7, 2006

Our solution was before we had a diagnosis was to put him in a cooperative where

he went to school 3 days a week and 2 days a week we homeschool using a schedule

that the teacher gives us. So those days when he just can't do it in school we

do it at home. At least he doesn't end up with all day in school and then hours

of homework after school. Now that we have the diagnosis we are especially

thankful we had made that decision. Our public school system isn't too

understanding of any sensory problems.

He is starting 2nd grade. We did move cooperatives this year due to gossiping

and ignorance on the part of some parents. He seems to have transistioned

already in his mind. We will see.

I taught middle school at the cooperative and we had two boys with the diagnosis

of Aspergers. It seemed to work really well for both families. Both children

came out of public school and were not working at grade level in at least one

subject. At the end of their first year they both were up to level in

everything. The one child I had for two years was honors roll by the end of the

second year. I know at the new cooperative I will have 1 student with Aspergers

and 1 student with Turrets. Both have been at the school for a while so the 3

day/2 day must work well for them also.

Re: ( ) Asperger in school

My case is similar not Aspergers but HFA. He would often have trouble

in class. The teachers told me they just let him write his lists and

didn't worry about school work at all as long as he was happy. I then

asked them to send whatever he missed home for homework, they said " Oh

that's ok we'll have him make it up sometime, or we wont worry about

it. " (he never had homework this was middle school) Partly because of

this we're homeschooling now, and he's getting work done.

Homeschooling is nice because I can have him do his work when he's in

a good mood.(atleast an ok mood)

August 7, 2006

We had ther same experience AlphaSmart. He did not want to be perceived as

being different. As with others, writing has been so difficult. We finally

tried using Dragon Naturally Speaking and this worked much better than

AlphaSmart. Also, Inspiration is very helpfull to organize thhoughts.

Brad

toozie <toozie@...> wrote:

My son was offered and Alphasmart, he used it for a bit, but I think he

didn't like being different. Writing is sooo frustrating for him, I don't

know why he didn't stay with the alphasmart, I guess finding the keys was

frustrating too. The Alphasmart is a keyboard/mini notepad they can type

into that can be plugged into a printer and what is typed in can be printed.

Kathy K

toozie@...

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August 7, 2006

Yes a half hour to do one long division problem, but he only does

one

a day, since he's finally learned to do it independantly, I just

don't

want him to forget how, we celebrated when he finally did one on his

own, he also does 10 review problems until he gets them mastered and

a

few new ones to learn. Probably two hours to do math alone. We

also

do language arts, science and social studies and then store skills.

He loves his day because school brought on lots and lots of anxiety

for him. He hated going to school and would cry everyday by 11:00

and

everyday at 11:00 they sent him home. If they didn't call me right

at

11:00 he would slam doors and knock over tables, etc. until they did

call me. I don't know what they could have done but I think calling

me was wrong at that point but I got him because they couldn't do

anything else. At home it may take him more than six hours only

because if he screams and cries he does his work when he's done with

his outburst or else he will learn to scream just to get out of work

at home. He has learned he can get done in four hours if he stays

in

a good mood with no screaming. Sometimes I let him off early, just

to tell him, " See when you stay in a good mood and do what I say,

your

day goes fast. Doesn't it? " He says " Oh yes, I love short days. "

So

now most days when I say it's work time he says " Short day? " I

say " yes it will be short if you stay in a good mood. " I let him

know

when his day is stretched out because of crying why it was long.

>

> How bad can it get when your child is not in an OK mood? I

supplement

> with extra work at home and my ds HATES it because its harder than

the

> public school curriculum even though I give him 3rd grade work and

he

> is going into 4th. The school doesn't offer a curriculum that

> challenges the students enough probably to keep their scores

high.

> Anyway, he screams and cries and I know he can do it he is just

> lazy...So how long is your schoolday at home? It takes over

an

> hour do to 10 minutes of work

>

August 8, 2006

My son is going to freak if he ever goes back to public school and gets all

the homework. Right now they don’t send homework home from his school. No

backpacks, pens, pencils, etc are allowed on the bus. All kids have to

empty their pockets and do a check-in when they get there before they go to

class. NO student is ever w/o staff, if a student needs to go somewhere

else on campus the are accompanied by staff.

Kathy K

toozie@...

_____

From:

[mailto: ] On Behalf Of Hall Melinda

Sent: Monday, August 07, 2006 6:30 PM

Subject: Re: ( ) Asperger in school

--- <randimarlene@ <mailto:randimarlene%40> >

wrote:

> Just the thought of homework turns my stomach into

> knots! UGH!

I am totally with you on that one! These kids have WAY

TOO MUCH homework nowadays. And with the time my kids

get home, they have little time for little more than

homework. The upper grades barely have a night that

they don't have homework. It just totally isn't

fair-aspie or not!!!

Melinda

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August 8, 2006

I hate homework. If it weren't for homework my kids would

probably have A's and B's but all the zeros from homework

bring their grades WAY down.When the psych suggested just

letting them do a couple of the problems to make sure they

understood and not having to do all of them , the

headmistress and HS counselor were AGHAST! No way, then

everyone would only want to do a few problems...So we'll be

getting more zeros, more failures and n is repeating

the 11th grade while his twin is a senior. UGH!!! Toni

> Just the thought of homework turns my stomach into

> knots! UGH! would have the same spelling homework

> (first grade) every week, on Monday he'd come home w/4

> nights of homework to do when and in what order he

> wished, but to hand in on Friday, some fill in the

> blanks, a word search, write the words 3 times each

> and then write a 5-7 sentence paragraph w/some of the

> sp words. He did ok for a few weeks but the last 3

> months of school, the whole neighborhood heard me

> trying to get him to do his homework. I ended up not

> sending in more than half of it. His report card

> reflected a decline in homework too. he would cry,

> whine, yell, scream, carry on and just completely melt

> down over it. and filled w/empty promises of doing it

> in the morning before school cuz he was " too tired " .

> Ugh. Homework. Don't get me started. I have high hopes

> for this Alphasmart thing his psychologist

> recommended.

>

> --- susister98 <susister98@...> wrote:

>

> > How do your children behave in school? I am going

> > to have a

> > behaviorist in school but we stil have the issuse of

> > homework when my

> > daughter turns into a monster.

> >

>

> __________________________________________________

>

August 8, 2006

Beth,

What is a cooperative? Is it part of the public school system? It sounds

like a good way to go. We had our son in homeschooling last yr (2nd grade)

and are looking into other offers by our school district. They are proposing

SDC class, and we are looking into a charter school within our school

district that is Montessori. Our big concern is that our son will not

be able to make it fulltime in either. Going 3 days and doing homeschool

is something that I have thought would be a good mix for him. I'm just

not sure how to sell the district on it. I think our son will be overloaded

again

and will start the bad tantrums again!

Kristy

Re: ( ) Asperger in school

My case is similar not Aspergers but HFA. He would often have trouble

in class. The teachers told me they just let him write his lists and

didn't worry about school work at all as long as he was happy. I then

asked them to send whatever he missed home for homework, they said " Oh

that's ok we'll have him make it up sometime, or we wont worry about

it. " (he never had homework this was middle school) Partly because of

this we're homeschooling now, and he's getting work done.

Homeschooling is nice because I can have him do his work when he's in

a good mood.(atleast an ok mood)

August 8, 2006

Our old psych quipped that, if the schools weren't so in love

in homework, she'd lose half her clients. She said it's insane

how stressing it can be even for kids who don't have LDs or

ASDs or anything, esp in high school.

Jackie

>

August 8, 2006

Well, here there are two cooperatives that work that way in this town. Both are

private Christian schools. One meets in a church and the other has taken over an

old school building. I do know that some public schools have them too because I

know of a girl in Washington state whose son has extreme anxiety to the point of

vomiting at open house for middle school and they put him in the public run one

that works similarly.

The other really big thing here in town and there are about 5 of them that meet

at different churchs though not technically " Christian " are the " Friday school "

types. They meet just once a week and offer classes for homeschoolers that

parents couldn't or wouldn't want to teach at home. In the 3 days a week type of

school you have report cards and the school is responsible to the state. In the

1 day a week type of school the parent is still responsible to the state for all

grades and meeting the homeschool criteria.

I did look into Montessori at one time but all the professionals we were dealing

with at the time said it wasn't that great of an option for kids who thrive on

schedule and need help with motivation.

Beth

Re: ( ) Asperger in school

My case is similar not Aspergers but HFA. He would often have trouble

in class. The teachers told me they just let him write his lists and

didn't worry about school work at all as long as he was happy. I then

asked them to send whatever he missed home for homework, they said " Oh

that's ok we'll have him make it up sometime, or we wont worry about

it. " (he never had homework this was middle school) Partly because of

this we're homeschooling now, and he's getting work done.

Homeschooling is nice because I can have him do his work when he's in

a good mood.(atleast an ok mood)

August 8, 2006

At every grade level, it's stupid. My NT nephew is 7. His homework is

nothing but busy work. His teacher is required to give him a certain

number of minutes of homework per day of homework. But please! Can't

she get a little creative about it? Does it HAVE to be the same tired

old worksheets? How 'bout giving them a compass and sending them

outside on compass drills? I didn't mind my son's high school

homework as long as it was meaningful. I mean, when you're taking

calculus, you need to practice it in order to learn it. And you need

to write English essays in order to become a better writer. (In my

opinion, they didn't do enough of that at 's school.) sigh. He

doesn't have to do 25 calculus problems, though. And perhaps he can

use Dragon Naturally Speaking to write his English papers. (a program

that allows you to speak the words and it types them into the

computer for you).

Liz

On Aug 8, 2006, at 9:11 AM, Jackie Geipel wrote:

>

> Our old psych quipped that, if the schools weren't so in love

> in homework, she'd lose half her clients. She said it's insane

> how stressing it can be even for kids who don't have LDs or

> ASDs or anything, esp in high school.

>

> Jackie\

August 9, 2006

Homework is really tough for kids with learning problems. Not only do they

struggle throughout the day to keep it together, but then they get home and have

to do MORE. Get an IEP and have it put in the IEP that homework is modified.

There is no reason to stress out about BUSYWORK that benefits nobody. Modifying

homework is a legitimate accomodation to put in an IEP so don't let anyone bull

you into thinking you are asking for the moon. It's done all the time.

Other ideas to make homework go more smoothly:

break the project down into chunks. Have him do 3 sentences, break, 4

sentences, break, etc.

Cover or fold the parts of the paper not being done. Sometimes the visual sight

of a page undone is enough to discourage them from trying. " It's too much! I

can't do it all! "

Provide plenty of time to get out and PLAY. Kids learn a lot through play.

Riding bikes, jumping and running are all good ways to keep the brain going.

Write/scribe for your child. If your child has a problem with handwriting, let

him use the computer to do his assignment OR write the answers for him. This

reduces the stress on him and you also get a good insight into what he is doing

at school too!

Have the teacher provide an incentive program on the school end to praise him

for having his work completed.

Make sure he has an agenda and that someone checks it to make sure he has what

he needs to DO the work in the first place.

Get tutoring in his IEP several times per week. He can get pulled out for 15

minutes to go over school work, finish assignments he had trouble with and get

personal attention to areas he is having problems with.

Monitor how long he is spending at homework and set a limit according to his

age/ability. Remember there is life beyond homework and don't get so caught up

in it that you become a nagging evil parent with a crappy relationship with your

kid and all you two ever do is wrestle over homework. (can you tell I've BTDT?)

Remember that once your child is an adult, his major problem will NOT be

homework/academic related but WILL be social. If he can do the math but can't

work well with others, he won't have a job. Prioritize what is most important

for YOUR child's education and consider that academics are but one item and

maybe not the most important item.

http://www.assew.org/articles/balancing_the_tray.htm

http://www.usevisualstrategies.com/p1.html

http://www.tonyattwood.com.au/index.htm go to " Tony's Publications " and scan

down until you see article about doing homework under " Archived Papers " .

Roxanna

( ) Asperger in school

How do your children behave in school? I am going to have a

behaviorist in school but we stil have the issuse of homework when my

daughter turns into a monster.

.

August 9, 2006

Liz,

Thanks, that's a great idea. I will do that!

Liz Bohn <lbohn@...> wrote: