Re: my 9 year old son---Roxanna

[Guest guest]

Roxanna,

Thanks for the great advice. I think I will check into having an

older child go in with him. I think he would like that. If I went

he would push my buttons and act worse for my benefit. Also, he does

not complain much either about recess but also just comments to me.

Occasionally he will sound really sad when he is already down about

something. But I know it really bothers him. He will intentionally

not finish his work so that he has to stay in during recess. This

just kills me. When I mentioned my concern to the school counselor,

she just said that it's because of the way he acts that he doesn't

have any friends. I thought Duh! Anyway, she doesn't see that as

the schools responsibility. So, I ordered the book Social Stories

that might help and Asperger's...What does it mean to me?. Another

book I bought that I really liked and that I have several family

members taking their turn with is " Can I tell you about

Asperger's. " It is divided into several short sections that is very

simple and to the point. It is meant for kids who are 7-15 and

friends and family of Aspergers kids. There is a section in the

back that is for the teacher of the Aspergers child. Anyway I read

the whole book in less than 30 minutes. It is so informative and

shows aspergers from their point of view. Anyway, I am rambling.

Thanks agian for the help.

CArrie

>

> In a message dated 1/24/2006 9:55:19 AM Eastern Standard Time,

> ca_fleming1@y... writes:

>

> My nine year old son was diagnosed with AS last spring. It was

really no

> surprise to me since he has always been different. I found the

diagnosis

> before any doctors would agree or anything. Fortunately, I am a

special ed major

> and had wonderful teachers who reviewed his pshychological

evaluations and

> encouraged me to push the school to test him for AS. Now his

life is somewhat

> easier in school. We are still learning what works best for

him. My

> biggest concern is that he does not have any friends. He does

not want to go to

> recess because nobody plays with him. Every now and then he will

talk about a

> couple kids that he played with but then a day or two later he

complains that

> they leave him out or won't play with him. I know that some of

this is a

> misconception on his part but how can I help him to develop

friendships? We go

> to church but not to Sunday School because if they ask him the

wrong

> question or say the wrong thing he might bolt and run. I would

love to get him

> involved in sunday school but am so afraid he will run and hide

or something

> and then be upset at himself for the way he acted. Does anybody

have any

> ideas? I also have a 7 year old son who doesn't go either because

his big

> brother doesn't go. I feel like I need to change this but don't

exactly know

> how. Any help would be appreciated.

> Thanks

>

>

>

>

>

> Hi ,

>

> I have a 9 yo w/HFA also and the same exact thing is going on.

He doesn't

> really complain that the kids won't play with him. But he

reports it. So I

> don't think it overly upsets him yet. But it bothers him.

>

> I'm not sure what to do yet to resolve this. I think I need to

get someone

> at school to go with him at recess and help facilitate social

activities

> w/him. But who and how....ugh. I don't know yet. I have

another ds who is 17

> w/HFA also and he's been keeping me busy lately. Sometimes I

can't do it all

> at once. But I need to get to the school and discuss these

things with his

> teachers and see what we can come up with.

>

> As for Sunday school, I would talk to the pastor or teacher and

see if they

> can provide an older child to be his " aide " and help him get into

the class.

> Or, if your ds wouldn't mind, you could be his aide until he gets

> comfortable. But there might be an older boy or girl who would

love to help and become

> like a " big brother " and go with him to class and help him go to

class. Or

> he could not be so obvious and help other kids as well, but the

emphasis

> would be with your ds. Can't hurt to ask.

>

> Roxanna

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 1/30/2006 11:26:56 AM Eastern Standard Time,

ca_fleming1@... writes:

This

just kills me. When I mentioned my concern to the school counselor,

she just said that it's because of the way he acts that he doesn't

have any friends. I thought Duh! Anyway, she doesn't see that as

the schools responsibility. So, I ordered the book Social Stories

that might help and Asperger's...What does it mean to me?.

You will run into many people who have this view point. Don't let it stop

you from getting help. It is surprising and sad that the school counselor

does not already have a program(s) in place to foster better friendship skills

among students. Sometimes there are lunch bunches or groups put together with

kids who have wonderful social skills mixed with those who need help. It's

not just kids with AS/HFA who need social skill help either - many kids can

benefit from learning how to be friends and how to interact successfully with

others. However, in the case of a child with an IEP, social skills are very

important to the process. In fact, the purpose of the law states: §300.1

Purposes.

The purposes of this part are—

(a) To ensure that all children with disabilities have available to them a

free appropriate public education that emphasizes special education and

related services designed to meet their unique needs and prepare them for

employment and independent living;

***

This highlights that it is not only filling these kids with facts that is

important but we also must assess their skills in daily living and in future

ability to hold a job and work with others. In all of these areas, social

skills are important.

Roxanna ô¿ö

Autism Happens

[Guest guest]

If you live near a major University, look around to see if they have

a " Center for the Development of Lanugage & Literacy " or something

like that. I discoverd that the center here had a " Friendship Club "

for austic kids, 4th-7th grade, most of whom have Aspergers. They

meet once a week for 6 weeks for 1 1/2 hours and work on social

skills. It's great! It does cost $$ though. My son is in his

second 6 week program and he loves it. I think it's really helping

him.

>

>

> In a message dated 1/30/2006 11:26:56 AM Eastern Standard Time,

> ca_fleming1@... writes:

>

> This

> just kills me. When I mentioned my concern to the school

counselor,

> she just said that it's because of the way he acts that he

doesn't

> have any friends. I thought Duh! Anyway, she doesn't see that

as

> the schools responsibility. So, I ordered the book Social

Stories

> that might help and Asperger's...What does it mean to me?.

>

>

> You will run into many people who have this view point. Don't let

it stop

> you from getting help. It is surprising and sad that the school

counselor

> does not already have a program(s) in place to foster better

friendship skills

> among students. Sometimes there are lunch bunches or groups put

together with

> kids who have wonderful social skills mixed with those who need

help. It's

> not just kids with AS/HFA who need social skill help either -

many kids can

> benefit from learning how to be friends and how to interact

successfully with

> others. However, in the case of a child with an IEP, social

skills are very

> important to the process. In fact, the purpose of the law

states: §300.1

> Purposes.

> The purposes of this part are†"

> (a) To ensure that all children with disabilities have available

to them a

> free appropriate public education that emphasizes special

education and

> related services designed to meet their unique needs and prepare

them for

> employment and independent living;

> ***

> This highlights that it is not only filling these kids with facts

that is

> important but we also must assess their skills in daily living and

in future

> ability to hold a job and work with others. In all of these

areas, social

> skills are important.

>

>

> Roxanna ô¿ö

> Autism Happens

>

>

>

>