Re: another question wwyd

[Guest guest]

Joanne...

I thought that was the job of the case manager...to be the intermediary

----in the middle! Can you speak with someone else at the school...like the

principal...to get this matter cleared up? Or is this person the spec ed

coordinator? Thinking of you...

Blessings,

Gail

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/8/2005 12:53:52 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

pltoc@... writes:

Joanne...

I thought that was the job of the case manager...to be the intermediary

----in the middle! Can you speak with someone else at the school...like

the

principal...to get this matter cleared up? Or is this person the spec ed

coordinator? Thinking of you...

Blessings,

Gail

THe principal hung up on me the other day...

I've got no where to tur except the school bd.

I lso thought parents met with the team at the end of the year.

THe case manager told me no. you meet once a year for the IEP

that's it.

Joanne

[Guest guest]

Are case managers what we call guidance counselors here?? The

only " case managers " that I know of around here are those from mental

health or social services, etc.

Anyway, I would call the principal or the school system's main office

and ask just what that person's role/job is and if she's not " the

one " to see about this stuff, who is? That way THEY

(administration) will know what is going on and can either straighten

her out or find you someone else to work with, see about things. And

you could also follow up anything you do (or don't) find out with a

letter, with copies to all; sort of a paper trail and letting anyone

you " copy " know of the situation also.

Just some quick thoughts this early a.m.! I had a disagreement on a

point with a school psych once, who actually said " take it up with

the state " ! So I composed a letter to the state exceptional

children's director. Then I emailed a note FIRST to the local school

system's EC director, asking if she would like to try to answer this

point before I mail it to the state director. And, yes, she really

wanted to; my mailing a letter to the state would start all kinds of

paperwork to/from the state that she would have to do; so we managed

to work things out locally. By the way, I was right, the school

psych wrong.

> Today the case mngr leaves a message saying,

> The medical forms are filled out do you want them to go home

with

> TRacy?

>

> I call back shes busy

>

>

[Guest guest]

When I have a problem at school that everyone keeps passing the buck on, I

usually call my advocate what would work. She usually tells me to write a

letter to the head of spec ed in the county, with a copy to the principal at the

school. Things seem to happen quite fast after that. I still don't get

much from the actual school, but the county office usually handles it. I am on

first name basis in the county office. They even pay me to drive my grandson

to another school.

Hope this idea helps. Candy

[Guest guest]

When I can't get something done at school I call my advocate for advice.

She usually tells me to write a letter to the head of spec ed in the county and

carbon copy one to the principal. Nowadays I just call the head of spec ed

and you wouldn't believe how things shape up.

Hope this helps. Candy

[Guest guest]

Here in NJ we have both. The guidance counselor and case manager are separate.

The guidance counselor is in the school daily and case manager coordinates

services and testing for the child and may work from the BOE offices.

( ) Re: another question wwyd

Are case managers what we call guidance counselors here?? The

only " case managers " that I know of around here are those from mental

health or social services, etc.

Anyway, I would call the principal or the school system's main office

and ask just what that person's role/job is and if she's not " the

one " to see about this stuff, who is? That way THEY

(administration) will know what is going on and can either straighten

her out or find you someone else to work with, see about things. And

you could also follow up anything you do (or don't) find out with a

letter, with copies to all; sort of a paper trail and letting anyone

you " copy " know of the situation also.

Just some quick thoughts this early a.m.! I had a disagreement on a

point with a school psych once, who actually said " take it up with

the state " ! So I composed a letter to the state exceptional

children's director. Then I emailed a note FIRST to the local school

system's EC director, asking if she would like to try to answer this

point before I mail it to the state director. And, yes, she really

wanted to; my mailing a letter to the state would start all kinds of

paperwork to/from the state that she would have to do; so we managed

to work things out locally. By the way, I was right, the school

psych wrong.

> Today the case mngr leaves a message saying,

> The medical forms are filled out do you want them to go home

with

> TRacy?

>

> I call back shes busy

>

>

[Guest guest]

My DS case manager helped me out with a problem with the principal last year.

They are supposed to put the child first.

Re: ( ) another question wwyd

Joanne...

I thought that was the job of the case manager...to be the intermediary

----in the middle! Can you speak with someone else at the school...like the

principal...to get this matter cleared up? Or is this person the spec ed

coordinator? Thinking of you...

Blessings,

Gail

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/8/2005 11:59:03 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

embroidery4@... writes:

Joanne...

I thought that was the job of the case manager...to be the intermediary

----in the middle! Can you speak with someone else at the school...like

the

principal...to get this matter cleared up? Or is this person the spec ed

coordinator? Thinking of you...

Blessings,

Gail

Don't feel that's an option

after the principal hung up on me regarding the incident with the

NOT missing lunch money

Joanne

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/8/2005 10:53:21 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

F1na11yfree@... writes:

When I can't get something done at school I call my advocate for advice.

She usually tells me to write a letter to the head of spec ed in the county

and

carbon copy one to the principal. Nowadays I just call the head of spec ed

and you wouldn't believe how things shape up.

Hope this helps. Candy

SO its over the case workers head the principal etc....

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/8/2005 10:51:47 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

F1na11yfree@... writes:

She usually tells me to write a

letter to the head of spec ed in the county, with a copy to the principal at

the

school. Things seem to happen quite fast after that. I still don't get

much from the actual school, but the county office usually handles it. I

am on

first name basis in the county office. They even pay me to drive my

grandson

to another school.

wow they pay you???

Joanne

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/11/2005 11:56:51 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

suso903tomb@... writes:

Document the conversation and try to meet with the teacher and principal

together. If you can't resolve things that way (and the principal is as big

a turkey as the teacher), then a (specific, polite) letter of complaint to

the superintendent would be a good idea. Copy the principal and teacher.

The next step after that, I think, would be to call an IEP team meeting and

bring an advocate and/or attorney with you. Make sure the head of special

education for your district is there.

I copied th teacher on all the issues he chose to ignore it.

I'm sorry, I can't remember ... has had an FBA (functional behavioral

assessment) done?

NO not sure what it is, basically behavior is not a problem for her.

she sticks to topics, everything is taken literal,and attention is my

concern

she takes adderall ...the imp when she got on it was dramatic.

at the time I questioned her, she was worrying about the parade

marching noise etc...

Her behavior went back to normal once the parade issuewas history .

Is this teacher telling you that she does not wish to speak with you about

? As a former teacher, I am finding this very hard to understand. I

would have been thrilled to have parents express this sort of concern and

would have been eager to meet, and so I think would many teachers. This

certainly does not reflect well on this teacher and would tend to indicate

that she has serious control issues. Either that or she feels swamped and

pressured by her other duties.

YEs this teacher (CASE MANAGER)

basically was going to ignore my concerns

....she didn't know me and didn' t appreciate being put in the middle

of this issue.

THe issue were,

Teacher not going over the spelling

(per IEP)

and the issues of extended school year services

having someone from the autism society

go into the classroom

and placement concerns for next year

she said these dont concern her

OMG she was the case mngr.

I walked away with a feeling of despair.

I am keeping a paper trail I'm documenting everything,

from this point forward no conversations will be had without witness.

And all correspondence by letter.

I can't imagine 29 years of taching and never being written a concern

by a parent

BULL..................

they twist everything.

I sd to the case manager I got called for missing lunch money shoes

that were not acceptable, what next.?

she looked at TRacy and said those shoes she has on aren't all that

safe either.

I said look she has problems with , ties straps

tight things

this is at good as it gets.

and the shoes were a slip on dress shoe Jane just without a

buckle

they fit fine

I like this one, -------------- I sd I never get paper work, notices

don't come home. Despite the IEP saying needs reminders

was in a performance last week, I never knew about it,

She says I have a 17 year old I never see paper work either .It's

called life.

I sd when I got the phone call at work about a missing $1.15 my heart

stopped. She replied one day I came on the house alarm was blaring

my 17 yr old was no where to be seen.

Since when was her 17 yr old the issue?

they are just looking to find something new to focus on

I'm being made the problem..

she sd so lets see THe teachers a problem, the principal, the

office staff,

and now me. did you ever think it could be you???

I don't have any faith in her judgement

Imagine being stuck with this case mngr.

Imagine a 3 page letter that you'd just ignore.

I couldn't

so no matter what I say or do,

they will look for anything to get at me.

they all sleep in the same bed,

and twisting is an art. What do you do?

DOn't take offense, but some teachers have been doing it to long.

\they forgot the reason they wanted to teach in the beginning

If your expressing concern in a letter is a first for this teacher, then I

am truly frightened for the state of education ... Goodness. I don't

believe it, though.

Best wishes!

T.

At 05:54 AM 4/11/2005 -0700, you wrote:

>momwithattitude2@... wrote:

>Today the case mngr leaves a message saying,

>The medical forms are filled out do you want them to go home with

>TRacy?

>

>I call back shes busy

>

>

>today when I picked up , Ms B met me

>in front of the school

>asked about the forms, and was going to leave.

>

>I asked her about my issues, and she informed me, that she had no

>interaction with me didn't know me and didn't know why I sent her my

>concerns.

>SO APPARENTLY SHE WAS Going to ignore them.

>I tried having a conversation, but I felt it was on deaf ears.

>She sd shes been teaching 29 years , and this was a first. But she

>was just brushing aside every issue I had.

>

>I sd you are the case mangager?

>she says yes

>I said I was told to send my concerns to you.

>

>She says I dont want to get in the middle.

>

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/11/2005 8:56:40 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

roxanna_neely@... writes:

You need to meet before school is out to discuss whether your child is

eligible for ESY.

I asked this question

she looked at me like I had 2 heads.

s doing very well

I dont think this would apply to her

Joanne

[Guest guest]

momwithattitude2@... wrote:

Today the case mngr leaves a message saying,

The medical forms are filled out do you want them to go home with

TRacy?

I call back shes busy

today when I picked up , Ms B met me

in front of the school

asked about the forms, and was going to leave.

I asked her about my issues, and she informed me, that she had no

interaction with me didn't know me and didn't know why I sent her my

concerns.

SO APPARENTLY SHE WAS Going to ignore them.

I tried having a conversation, but I felt it was on deaf ears.

She sd shes been teaching 29 years , and this was a first. But she

was just brushing aside every issue I had.

I sd you are the case mangager?

she says yes

I said I was told to send my concerns to you.

She says I dont want to get in the middle.

O MY freaking word...........

is this a joke

a Nightmare

am I dreaming??????

what NOW

JOANNE

Definitely go to her boss and take your concerns there. You also should

document this unhelpful person in writing for future reference. You can do both

at once - write a letter to the superintendent or head of sped, tell them you

asked these questions and what answer you received. Then tell them you would

like the answers asap.

Roxanna

Look alive. Here comes a buzzard.

-- Pogo

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Joanne,

Document the conversation and try to meet with the teacher and principal

together. If you can't resolve things that way (and the principal is as big

a turkey as the teacher), then a (specific, polite) letter of complaint to

the superintendent would be a good idea. Copy the principal and teacher.

The next step after that, I think, would be to call an IEP team meeting and

bring an advocate and/or attorney with you. Make sure the head of special

education for your district is there.

I'm sorry, I can't remember ... has had an FBA (functional behavioral

assessment) done?

Is this teacher telling you that she does not wish to speak with you about

? As a former teacher, I am finding this very hard to understand. I

would have been thrilled to have parents express this sort of concern and

would have been eager to meet, and so I think would many teachers. This

certainly does not reflect well on this teacher and would tend to indicate

that she has serious control issues. Either that or she feels swamped and

pressured by her other duties.

If your expressing concern in a letter is a first for this teacher, then I

am truly frightened for the state of education ... Goodness. I don't

believe it, though.

Best wishes!

T.

At 05:54 AM 4/11/2005 -0700, you wrote:

>momwithattitude2@... wrote:

>Today the case mngr leaves a message saying,

>The medical forms are filled out do you want them to go home with

>TRacy?

>

>I call back shes busy

>

>

>today when I picked up , Ms B met me

>in front of the school

>asked about the forms, and was going to leave.

>

>I asked her about my issues, and she informed me, that she had no

>interaction with me didn't know me and didn't know why I sent her my

>concerns.

>SO APPARENTLY SHE WAS Going to ignore them.

>I tried having a conversation, but I felt it was on deaf ears.

>She sd shes been teaching 29 years , and this was a first. But she

>was just brushing aside every issue I had.

>

>I sd you are the case mangager?

>she says yes

>I said I was told to send my concerns to you.

>

>She says I dont want to get in the middle.

>

>O MY freaking word...........

>is this a joke

>a Nightmare

>am I dreaming??????

>

>what NOW

>

>JOANNE

>

>

>

>Definitely go to her boss and take your concerns there. You also should

>document this unhelpful person in writing for future reference. You can

>do both at once - write a letter to the superintendent or head of sped,

>tell them you asked these questions and what answer you received. Then

>tell them you would like the answers asap.

>

>

>

>

>Roxanna

>

>Look alive. Here comes a buzzard.

>-- Pogo

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>__________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

I agree. This teacher sounds like a fright. If the principal is ignoring

you, then it might be a good idea to call an IEP team meeting and invite

the director of special ed for the district. Taking an advocate can help,

because that person is less likely to be emotionally invested in the

outcome and because he or she can lend expertise in working with schools to

accommodate the needs of children like . Advocates can either run the

meeting or help you run the meeting. Many will work for free. I'm using my

son's therapist, but I also met three community advocates at a support

group meeting who do not charge for their time. So getting out there in

your community and networking with other families would be a good idea.

If you call the meeting, it's your meeting. You can call as many as you

like, and you get to cover your agenda, not theirs. I usually type up my

own agenda and assume I'm leading the meeting. This drives them all a bit

nuts, but hey, at least I'm returning the favor!

Good luck! And please don't let them take the upper hand over you. You are

the taxpayer who pays these people to educate your child. You have every

right to play a key role in determining what is on 's IEP and asking

that it be followed.

The reasons I think many teachers and principals find this annoying are 1)

the vast majority of parents do not question or challenge IEP teams and in

fact many do not bother to show up at meetings, and 2) increasingly

teachers and principals are being asked to safeguard taxpayer dollars from

" frivolous " requests; they view themselves as gatekeepers, which fosters an

adversarial relationship with parents.

If the teacher and principal believe you will call an IEP team meeting

every time you have concerns, never fear, they will begin to communicate

with you. These meetings tie a lot of people up and are murder to schedule

(which your lovely case manager/teacher has to do). They will not want to

keep doing this. But you have every right to call a meeting whenever you want.

One thing I recommend highly is a communications log (which you would

request at the IEP meeting). I am keeping one up with Sasha's teacher and

aides and wish we had started this long ago! Perhaps the teacher would feel

less threatened writing to you than meeting with you face to face. I do

seem to get along better with Sasha's teacher this way. (She is more

positive when she writes.) If you do keep one, it's a good idea to keep a

photocopy of it, as these things tend to disappear without warning.

T.

mom of Sasha, 7

At 12:39 PM 4/11/2005 -0400, you wrote:

>YEs this teacher (CASE MANAGER)

>basically was going to ignore my concerns

>...she didn't know me and didn' t appreciate being put in the middle

>of this issue.

>THe issue were,

>

>Teacher not going over the spelling

>

>(per IEP)

>and the issues of extended school year services

>

>having someone from the autism society

>go into the classroom

>

>and placement concerns for next year

[Guest guest]

I second 's idea of a communications log. We are using a variation

of this with . His English teacher is e-mailing me his homework

assignments every day. Sometimes will do part of his homework

and tell me that he has finished it. So this is an effort to intervene

and short circuit this process. Little monster. Er, not so little. He

is 6'1 " . Armed with the knowledge of his homework assignment, I can ask

pointed questions. " Did you answer the essay questions on Catcher in

the Rye? " (his most hated book in the whole wide world anywhere) By the

way, a book that he loves is The Man who Mistook His Wife for a Hat, by

Oliver Sacks, a neurologist. He loves that! Sorry, I am rambling. Talk

to you all later, Liz

On Apr 11, 2005, at 6:47 PM, Tombrello wrote:

>

> One thing I recommend highly is a communications log (which you would

> request at the IEP meeting). I am keeping one up with Sasha's teacher

> and

> aides and wish we had started this long ago! Perhaps the teacher would

> feel

> less threatened writing to you than meeting with you face to face. I do

> seem to get along better with Sasha's teacher this way. (She is more

> positive when she writes.) If you do keep one, it's a good idea to

> keep a

> photocopy of it, as these things tend to disappear without warning.

>

> T.

> mom of Sasha, 7

[Guest guest]

On Apr 8, 2005, at 5:15 AM, momwithattitude2@... wrote:

> I lso thought parents met with the team at the end of the year.

> THe case manager told me no. you meet once a year for the IEP

>

> that's it.

>

> Joanne

>

*THAT is b.s. You are legally allowed to call an IEP as often as you

want to do so!! They are flat lying to you, Joanne, and I am angry for

you!

Tina

livin' in Alphabet Soup with:

, 6, AS/HFA , anxiety

Jordan 10, GAD, BP, OCD

Jasmine as NT as it gets, for now

dw to Jon- AS but fixated on computers= $$

" The three most important voices: the voice of your heart, the voice of

your gut and the voice of your child. " -Heidi Lissauer -adult with

autism who has autistic children, as well

[Guest guest]

On Apr 12, 2005, at 10:21 AM, Liz Bohn wrote:

> " Did you answer the essay questions on Catcher in

> the Rye? " (his most hated book in the whole wide world anywhere) By the

> way, a book that he loves is The Man who Mistook His Wife for a Hat, by

> Oliver Sacks, a neurologist. He loves that! Sorry, I am rambling. Talk

> to you all later, Liz

>

**Ok, why does he hate Catcher? And The Man... is funny.

Tina

livin' in Alphabet Soup with:

, 6, AS/HFA , anxiety

Jordan 10, GAD, BP, OCD

Jasmine as NT as it gets, for now

dw to Jon- AS but fixated on computers= $$

" The three most important voices: the voice of your heart, the voice of

your gut and the voice of your child. " -Heidi Lissauer -adult with

autism who has autistic children, as well

[Guest guest]

Any time your child's needs need you can call an IEP to adjust the

accommodations. Don't let the school bully you !!!!

Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.......

F

" When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know

peace. "

-- Jimi Hendrix

Re: ( ) another question wwyd

On Apr 8, 2005, at 5:15 AM, momwithattitude2@... wrote:

> I lso thought parents met with the team at the end of the year.

> THe case manager told me no. you meet once a year for the IEP

>

> that's it.

>

> Joanne

>

*THAT is b.s. You are legally allowed to call an IEP as often as you

want to do so!! They are flat lying to you, Joanne, and I am angry for

you!

Tina

livin' in Alphabet Soup with:

, 6, AS/HFA , anxiety

Jordan 10, GAD, BP, OCD

Jasmine as NT as it gets, for now

dw to Jon- AS but fixated on computers= $$

" The three most important voices: the voice of your heart, the voice of

your gut and the voice of your child. " -Heidi Lissauer -adult with

autism who has autistic children, as well

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/13/2005 12:57:25 A.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

casadecruz@... writes:

THAT is b.s. You are legally allowed to call an IEP as often as you

want to do so!! They are flat lying to you, Joanne, and I am angry for

you!

Tina

livin' in Alphabet Soup with:

they have me so drained Tina

my main concern right now esy.

I'm waiting for my answer

and somehow I don't think I'll get it

Joanne

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/12/2005 11:16:40 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

roxanna_neely@... writes:

Well, that may be true. But you should have a meeting to discuss it anyway.

Roxanna

and on the bottom of the iep wher it should have a date to

determine esy service

its all blank

think they want us to be unaware and ininformed

Joanne

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 4/12/2005 11:15:37 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time,

roxanna_neely@... writes:

..... " ugh. But I usually reply, " Yes, but all high school kids don't have

autism. So let's get back to what my kid needs.... "

what a great RESPONSE

I need to store these away

maybe we should compile a list of expert responses

Joanne

[Guest guest]

My advocate always tells me they have 10 days from when I request an IEP to

have it actually happen.

Candy

[Guest guest]

Both my kids hated Catcher. I think it has to do with the nature of the

book. It's deeply introspective in a way that they hate. ,

especially, hates that. All the assignments that go along with it are

introspective and reflective. One assignment was " Is establishing a

mature relationship with the oposite sex difficult? How and why? "

Another assignment was " Who do you feel the closest to in your life and

why? " EEEK! These assignments were from the period when was on

strike, so he's got to make them up. So if you hear shrieking from down

the coast a bit, you'll know it's us.

Liz

On Apr 12, 2005, at 10:43 PM, Tina Cruz wrote:

>

>

> On Apr 12, 2005, at 10:21 AM, Liz Bohn wrote:

>

>> " Did you answer the essay questions on Catcher in

>> the Rye? " (his most hated book in the whole wide world anywhere) By

>> the

>> way, a book that he loves is The Man who Mistook His Wife for a Hat,

>> by

>> Oliver Sacks, a neurologist. He loves that! Sorry, I am rambling.

>> Talk

>> to you all later, Liz

>>

>

> **Ok, why does he hate Catcher? And The Man... is funny.

>

>

>

> Tina

> livin' in Alphabet Soup with:

> , 6, AS/HFA , anxiety

> Jordan 10, GAD, BP, OCD

> Jasmine as NT as it gets, for now

> dw to Jon- AS but fixated on computers= $$

[Guest guest]

Hi Liz,

I remember really liking Catcher when I was a kid. I read it again as an

adult, along with Salinger's Nine Short Stories, and I said to myself,

" Man, this guy was really messed up. He is so at odds with the world. " And

what a Freudian. Okay, I know he was enormously influential, and I can

understand how played into the whole disaffection with established

institutions and with materialism that blossomed into the Beat Generation

and later the love culture of the late 1960's and early 1970's.

Anyway, I can understand why kids like ours wouldn't care for the book. I

try to imagine Sasha making sense of the brass ring on the carousel at the

end of the novel, how the little girl reaches for it and breaks Holden's

heart with that one gesture. This is heavy stuff. If my kid can't handle

criticism, I can't imagine him willingly taking on the theme of depression

and suicide that runs through Salinger's writings. It's hard enough for me

to re-read that stuff knowing that my child struggles so to make sense of

his own emotions.

Much more comforting to him are books that take him on a journey outside

reality, such as the Harry Potter books. And I can imagine that he will be

really, really, really into JRR Tolkien.

I will have to pick up The Man some day. That sounds like a hoot.

T.

At 10:21 AM 4/12/2005 -0700, you wrote:

>I second 's idea of a communications log. We are using a variation

>of this with . His English teacher is e-mailing me his homework

>assignments every day. Sometimes will do part of his homework

>and tell me that he has finished it. So this is an effort to intervene

>and short circuit this process. Little monster. Er, not so little. He

>is 6'1 " . Armed with the knowledge of his homework assignment, I can ask

>pointed questions. " Did you answer the essay questions on Catcher in

>the Rye? " (his most hated book in the whole wide world anywhere) By the

>way, a book that he loves is The Man who Mistook His Wife for a Hat, by

>Oliver Sacks, a neurologist. He loves that! Sorry, I am rambling. Talk

>to you all later, Liz