Re: Re: will starve before eating something new

[Guest guest]

,

Wow, I am not sure I'd be able to go that long. All he drinks is milk and

water, and I can't imagine having him ask for milk all day and not being able to

give it to him. But, we have the appt with the nutritionist on 10/15, so we'll

do whatever she recommends. I just hope it isn't too drastic. The poor guy has

been through so much lately. On the other hand, it sounds like things got

better quickly once she decided other foods were 'food'. I'm so torn and

confused right now!

Re: will starve before eating something new

Hi ,

I thought I would share my story, though it's not one

I'm proud of...when I started my daughter on the GFCF

diet 4 years ago, I told our DAN doc that she, too

would starve before leaving her " big 6 " (the only 6

things she would eat). I was a big doubter about the

diet because my daughter never had the symptoms most

talk about--stool problems, infections, etc. She was

truly very healthy and her big 6 were (what I thought

were) relatively " healthy foods " . Anyway, I started

the diet and my daughter ate NOTHING for 3 full days.

I was LOSING IT! Just when I had decided that she

really would starve before eating gfcf versions of her

favorites, she tried them (morning of the 4th day).

I'm rather ashamed that I nearly starved my daughter

when she was 4 years old, but the payoff was worth it.

After beginning the diet, she began eating SO MANY

more foods than she used to--she will literally try

anything now, not to mention eating truly healthy

stuff (I've been educated about what is truly healthy

since the time I thought her big 6--apples,

applesauce, yogurt, chicken nuggets, mac & cheese, and

grapes--were healthy for her). For children that

self-limit, often the biggest thing that needs to

happen is that those things need to be taken away.

I'm not saying that if a child shows they like

something it's evil, or if they get on kicks where

that's all they want to eat *for a while* is bad, but

if you truly think that your child will STARVE without

some food/drink (and you could be right), I think

that's a big indicator that the food/drink is a

problem.

[Guest guest]

,

I thought soy milk could cause problems as well? Or does it vary from child to

child? I've heard such negative things about soy for long I was thinking about

going to potato or rice first. I guess I'm also afraid that I won't know what

is helping or hurting since so much is changing at once.

Have you tried gradually changing his milk over to soy, rice or potato milk?

Maybe if you do an ounce a day and not let him see you add the other milk then

maybe he could tolerate it better than doing it all at once.

That is what we had to do with my son (he was addicted to milk) and now he

loves the soy milk (but is not addicted to). By doing it gradually we were able

to wean him off the 2% and Whole Milk within a week.

[Guest guest]

,

Thank you so much!! My son doesn't really understand turns yet, but I will

definitely say it and hope he will understand soon enough. We just got the

report in the mail from Kennedy-Krieger today saying that although he's 28

months, he's only functioning about 12-14 months with regard to language and

visual processing. I am so upset to think he's so far behind, but it does give

me something to work toward, and something to measure his progress by. So, for

now, I'm not sure he'll take well to logical arguments, but I also don't think

it's too early to try.

We did switch him to organic/non-fortified milk last night with no major

objections. I think I will try diluting his snack and lunch-time milk to see if

I can get him to eat more and reduce his dependency on the milk. What is your

opinion as to whether or not the enzymes are enough to handle the milk, or if I

should be trying to take him off it completely?

I think the line 'they will eat when they get hungry enough' is

likely to work for NT people where this came from. But a person with

impaire or different neuro-feedback mechanisms may not have the right

signal function so this will work. They may not be correlating the

right things and so many very well be starving away. I wouldn't push

the withholding food (or milk in this case) too long if you don't

feel it is right for your child.

If you don't want to switch to soy (and I don't think much of

soy 'milk'), you can try diluting it with water. This may slowly make

the milk less satisfying without dehydrating her.

My son is a very logical thinker. So with him I could say in a very

matter-of-fact tone, " You can have some more milk after you have some

meat (or fruit or vegetable). It is meat's turn. You can choose which

kind of meat but you need some meat for protein next to stay healthy.

Then you can have milk again. " I use the Every-Food-Gets-A-Turn

approach. I am not saying no to milk. Just not now. And my son gets

to choose *when* he has it. If he doesn't want to eat meat now that

is fine. But the next thing he eats is from the meat category. This

gives him some control in the matter. He can choose the meat too.

This approach works extremely well with him as it uses his natural

disposition and a reasoning approach he already has.

The other poster was soooo correct...different kids have different

underlying reasons for their behaviors. So one solution doesn't fit

all.

.

[Guest guest]

,

One of the things that has me the most excited and willing to post here is that

in all my lurking, I've never seen such a positive, helpful, wonderful group of

people. I can't imagine anyone taking what you said as a personal remark! It's

so hard for me to deal with all my fears/hopes/realizations that if this group

wasn't so supportive, I can't imagine telling even what little I've shared so

far. Thank you!!!!

I really want to apologize if I made it sound like giving soy was

really really bad (and that anyone choosing that for their family was

doing something unwise). I just didn't think about it coming across

like that. Of course, if a child is doing well with it, that's great.

I don't believe in making any food universally 'evil'. Some kids that

have problems with cow milk also have problems with soy.

So, particularly for , it wasn't meant to be a personal remark

at all.

.

[Guest guest]

Thanks ! Being patient is so hard for me. I see progress and want to go

full speed ahead, but I know I have to be reasonable and cautious. I'm really

lucky though in that my husband is just as concerned about my son as I am and

fully supports all the interventions we've been trying. He does try to act as

the voice of reason/patience and make sure I don't try too much at once. I

think that's even harder on him because I know he is just as excited as I am

when we see progress.

From my experience, stay calm and go slow. I got to the point where

I didn't have any idea if or what was working, and then we got to the

point where he wasn't progressing. So I had to pull everything and

start over. One step at a time, and be patient (that's the hard part

for me!)