aggression

March 11, 2008

My son is 4.5 years old. He's was diagnosed first with oral apraxia, and then

with verbal apraxia. He's been in speech therapy since he was 18 months old.

Currently, he is very verbal. He communicates in sentences, but is not always

intelligibile. I think I understand him way more than others do, so I have a

hard time knowing when others find him difficult to understand.

We recently had an appointment with the developmental pediatrician. We've been

having problems with him being aggressive with his little brother, and sometimes

the other two kids at the babysitters. He seems to do okay in preschool though

-- he just keeps to himself. He's very controlling and if others don't play

with the toys the way he wants them to, he gets upset and will lash out. He

also gets upset if he doesn't get what he wants when he wants it and will hit.

He's hit, kicked, thrown things at, and tried to choke his little brother.

Don't get me wrong, there are some times when they get along, but these fights

occur several times a day. The dev. ped suggested that the aggression is a

result of his difficulty with communication. He's not entirely comfortable

using his words to express himself, so he often does it physically. He also

suggested that he may not know how to express his wants effectively using words,

so he resorts to getting physical.

I understand what the dev. ped is saying, but -- Jake does use words. In fact,

AS he is hitting or pushing, he is usually also yelling. I have heard him say

'Can I have that truck?'. So he knows how to ask for things nicely. However,

if the other child doesn't give him the truck immediately, or even worse -says

'no' --Jake will 'attack'. So it almost seems to me that its more of an impulse

control issue than a communication issue. What do you think?

Will continued improvement in communication skills help this? He does get

consequences for this behavior -time out. And he can state the rule -no

fighting, and no hitting. What else can we do to help curb this behavior?

Thanks,

Jen

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