Guest guest Posted April 1, 2008 Report Share Posted April 1, 2008 Nadine you raise a good point about overcoming for yourself and you are to be applauded as well one who has helped advocate for many special needs children in your career as an attorney. We'd all like to hear more about you. About that article/email you posted... As of yet there is no blood test for some of these conditions. Asperger Syndrome in the CNN reporter was diagnosed at almost 50 (OK 48) years old... due to her reporting on it. In her case -don't you think someone else would have noticed it first? Her parents? Her husband? Her many doctors all her life? And come to think of it - speaking of her parents -she suspects her father (what is he -80?) is autistic too. This reminds me of when I worked in fashion with tons of gay men who assumed all men wanted to be or were gay. They assumed if we were walking down the street together and a car filled with guys beeped the horn and cat called it was for them and not me. Not true -just like not true that everyone that is rude or a geek is autistic. Some people have sensory issues -that's not necessarily autism either. My husband calls me the bionic nose and it's not a gift I can tell you that. Try to work in NYC in the summer with a bionic nose if you don't believe me! But it's not a danger to me -so I don't have to cure it. This 50 (OK 48)year old married with friends CNN reporter pleads " Don't pity me or try to cure or change me. " Why would anyone have pitied, or tried to " cure or change her " since she diagnosed herself at 50 (OK 48)years old with Asperger Syndrome? Doesn't she kind of bring this on herself by placing a label of autism on herself at 50 (OK 48) years old? One can't help but pity her husband- but there are many men married to women who can be bee-oches. Also why not keep it Asperger Syndrome and not " aspies " since it's a diagnosis and not a cutsie nickname. The rule of thumb is if nobody notices but you, and you don't need any drugs to be the way you are - perhaps that's just you and you don't need a diagnosis to explain who you are. Everyone is normal or strange in some way -that's why we are all " unique " . But going back to those other notice have a diagnosis and the line " Don't pity me or try to cure or change me. " While some aspects of sensory don't matter -decreased pain can be dangerous which is still something my son Tanner has. Tanner and I have spoken about it and he insists that he can in some way feel pain...in the way you can calmly talk about it vs. screaming in pain about it. Offlist I've been speaking with someone about this for Tanner. While perhaps the button thing still frustrates him -Tanner is happy with the way he talks and senses things. He's decided he doesn't want to change. The vitamin E brought increased pain sensation to him which I of course see as a good thing (child continues to play with a broken finger -the tough kid that doesn't cry when he gets stiches) and when we first started the vitamin E -the pain was almost overfelt as you can read in the archives. It's faded and while his speech is smoother with it-he doesn't want the increased pain sensation - what's " normal " So I'm not sure if we'll be able to ever change him at this point. But on the other hand I'm thrilled that his self esteem is that high- he accepts the way he is -and likes it. Below are archvies on how we talked to Tanner about his apraxia - because Nadine I so agree with you on that. Also perhaps can share how when Khalid was younger her and her husband kept Khalid's apraxia from him. It wasn't until he was working with a school based SLP at 8 that explained his apraxia to him that Khalid understood why he was different and was upset nobody told him sooner. telling me this story is what prompted me to discuss the apraxia with Tanner...but not until I thought he would be in the situation where he may stand out -mainstream kindergarten. Re: , to continue on the conversation from the other day. Hi Michele! I had to smile when you asked if I got any suggestions on this - because I so wish. I'm really swamped today and in a rush - so please excuse any typos! If he's talking to you about this now, he's old enough for you to sit down with him and have a heart to heart. There is no guide book I can let you know about yet for this, so I hope my suggestions can help you to help him, and also to help you to appreciate that you've reached this point! I believe the heart to hearts keep the self esteem high, teach our children how to deal with teasing and/or keep from being teased, and most important teach them to accept themselves for who they are, as they are. In his 9 years Tanner's been one of the boys with the same amount of teasing as any other kid. Hardly ever. The first heart to heart talk I ever had with Tanner was when he was 3 when we stopped the fish oils right after we started them. Why did we stop? Because he was surging so much and it was one week of testing by the public school, and a critical week for me to try to secure him appropriate therapies. I describe that week (from you know where) as the hardest thing I had to do for Tanner, and Glenn - I had to hide the fish oils from him because he thought it was nuts to stop Tanner. But he didn't know what went on in the schools at that time (now too?) where " inclusive therapy " (group therapy) 15 minutes twice a week was the norm! (at his school anyway) It was clear that Tanner " had it, and then knew he lost it " Zimet CCC SLP who now works for EI in Georgia was Tanner's EI therapist at this time and couldn't believe the difference. if you read this- please let everyone know what you recall. Michele stopping them for a week prior to testing did assure he would not test well at all as an FYI. Besides so many still don't believe or give credit to them " working " anyway -so why would they care if you stopped them even if they knew?! Here's the first heart to heart moment ever at 3: Tanner had just come out of the bathtub and was at this point wrapped up in his cute little robe with a towel over his head, and when I said " OK we have to get dressed now " he pointed to his nose. I had not a clue why but casually said " What your nose? " he shook his head no and pointed to his nose again. " You got water up your nose, you hit it on something? " Ooh daring -a double guess in one. He stamped his foot no and again pointed to his nose. I said trying to change the subject " OK well let's forget that for a second and just get you dressed " For the first time ever, Tanner threw himself on the ground and started to cry really hard while burrowing his face into the carpet. I laid down on the ground next to him and softly said to him while he wasn't paying attention at first because he was crying (from memory at this point so not exactly unless you can find this in the archives which it's there somewhere) " Tanner I know it's hard to learn to talk but everyone has to learn to talk. " Tanner amazingly stopped crying hard and gradually as I continued to speak looked at me as I spoke. That had never happened before and I recall I was shocked. I went on " Me and Daddy and Dakota and and everyone, we are all going to help you to learn to talk. And I remember it used to make me cry too when my Mommy didn't understand me when I was learning to talk. " (made that up -I spoke non stop from as long as everyone recalls) Then I said " just remember really, really hard what you want to say up here (and touched his head) so that when you learn to talk you can tell everyone. And we'll be there for you the entire time. We are going to help you and you will learn to talk. It's going to be OK Tanner it really is. " And this is the part I still don't believe happened. I then said " OK? " and Tanner nodded his head in agreement. At 3 I had a " conversation " with him that was deep beyond his years. That was one of the first. From then on I looked at moments of breakdown as moments of breakthrough. The next big one was prior to starting kindergarten just before his 6th birthday. I knew he was going from the amazing out of district placement Summit Speech School for the Hearing Impaired (yes it was worth it in the long run to not give Tanner fish oils for that one week but I swore I'd never do that to him again!) This heart to heart was not due to frustration on his part, but to prepare him. I said to him (and this is also word for word in the archives) " Tanner when you were a little baby you had very high fevers that gave you a boo boo here " and I touched his head. " That's the reason it's been a bit harder for you to learn to talk. But Tanner you are amazing! Most of us talk using a small amount of our brain, but Tanner somehow you figured out another pathway to learn to talk and nobody really knows how you did it. You actually use more of your brain when you talk then the average person which is amazing Tanner! But sometimes people that only use a small amount of their brain will hear the way you talk, and may say something that's not nice about you. But that's because they only use a teeny bit of their brain so you have to feel sorry for them. " Then I said in mock serious " But Tanner, just because you use more of your brain than most people don't go thinking you are better than anybody else! " Tanner put his head down so I couldn't see him smile but I could and I mock acted upset and said " Tanner! " Then we both hugged. The one time Tanner got teased I said to him " People will say mean things when they don't like themselves or when they are having a bad day. Like for example perhaps their dog just died and they are in a bad mood because of that. They may say something mean to you but that's because they are sad. So don't be upset with them, feel sorry for them because maybe their dog just died. " During the heart to heart talks you can bring up your own " memories " of similar situations to relate. And there are other ways to help too. Acting! Help to get other rouge phrases in his motor memory by acting them out. Help him by practicing with him and teach him how to practice on his own. For example when nobody but the two of you are around pretend practice opening presents. Let him know that most people don't say much when they open a present other than " thank you " or " ooooooh " or at most " wow just what I wanted " Figure out rouge expressions for that situation. I have in the archives how Tanner used to practice expressions in the mirror over and over when he thought nobody was around. " You want to play? Want to play? " You...want to play? " You WANT TO play? " saying the same thing over and over. He'd also practice facial expressions in the mirror. Dolan who is working on her masters in Early Childhood Special Head at the University of Florida grew up with apraxia. I met her at a book signing for The Late Talker, and she told me she to this day practices what she is going to say in new situations and tries to think ahead what will come up. Have to tell you that it's hard to know is apraxic today - but her Mother, Father, and Grandmother who were all there with backed up everything. said she only breaks down if she " goes off track " and only lets that happen with close family and friends. Mustafa used to act out situations with Khalid to help get him prepared. will fill in more on this! The CHERAB Foundation was invited all expenses paid, and I've chosen her son Khalid who is now in college and one of our greatest success stories as a group to attend and perhaps speak on behalf of the CHERAB Foundation at an International Conference sponsored by a major US magazine. (yes you read that correctly!) An apraxic child can grow up to be anything or do anything...even acting or public speaking. And through CHERAB I know that for a fact! If you want your son to speak with Tanner let me know. Tanner's talked to a few other kids (and parents and professionals) already and loves to help when he can. From: " kiddietalk " <kiddietalk@...> Date: Fri Oct 15, 2004 10:43 am Subject: Re: What do I say? I am so proud of you!!! I smiled reading what you said to your son - what a great mommy you are!!! This is such an important topic so I'm so glad you brought this up -self esteem is so precious -and important to keep high for our children. All kids can feel bad about themselves at times -all kids can be teased at times -so all of that is normal. It's how we help them deal and learn to overcome. It's how we have a " conversation " with a child who is feeling bad about their inabilities to have full conversations. When a child suddenly notices they are different -I like to rule out why. What's the sudden change? I mean think about it -if children didn't start school until 7 and there were no children his age in the neighborhood -how would a 6 year old know he's different...unless someone tells him, or it becomes that obvious because he's around a bunch of others his age who easily do what he can't -talk well. Your son is at the age where he would be aware of differences, especially if he is schooled with 'normal' speech wise children. And school must have just started for your son. So that should be number one place to look for this sudden awareness, and think about talking to the teacher to ask her if something is going on there. A good thing you can do just in case even to prevent problems is the " circle of friends " Please let me know if you need to know how to do that. Is your son in kindergarten or first grade now? What type of placement? I would also find out from him if anyone has teased him. There has been just two (thankfully) situations since Tanner was in school where there was a child that teased him about the way he talks. Both times -Tanner came home moody -not himself. He also typically loves going to school and was resistant to go around those two times. What is interesting is that both times at first when I asked him " did someone tease you at school? " Tanner said " No " The way I got it out of him was by relating (OK so it wasn't true -but he doesn't know that) by saying " It's OK to let Daddy and me know if someone teased you -sometimes people say bad things to you when they are having a bad day, or they don't feel good about themselves. Like maybe their dog just died and they are in a bad mood. Or maybe they are jealous because you are so smart and they don't feel that smart. " and then I would say something like " I remember one day I had to go to the bathroom and I tried to say " I have to go to the bathroom " and instead said " I have potty " and the other kids thought I pooped in my pants " I figured that had to be worse than any speech blooper he had! And you know stuff like that works for Tanner -makes him laugh at me -and at himself. Then he tells me what really happened. Perhaps it's due to those two times early on that Tanner is never teased now. He knows how to handle it -it's hard for a bully to tease someone who doesn't get upset. And speaking of bully -as the list owner please let me know off list who is invading your privacy - and I'll report them to and the FBI. This is a family grouplist with zero tolerance for bullies. We chose to talk to Tanner about his speech impairment in a child appropriate way prior to him entering kindergarten just in case he was teased, or wondered why he had to work so hard on something that came so easily to others -talking. And the good news is that in addition to what you already did -it's not to late to add a bit more if you feel appropriate. I found it to be most important for school age children with speech impairments. I told Tanner that I was an artist in New York for years -so the word different for me is not a bad thing at all -normal was a bad thing to me! Being different is not unusual anyway -we are all different. You can ask your son how many people in his school/does he know that wear glasses. Remind him that wearing glasses means that person needs help seeing, just like he needs some help talking. Their vision may not be as good as yours, you can say, but that doesn't mean that those people can't do or be whatever they want -just like you. I told Tanner about Helen Keller -and about the diamond " A diamond is a lump of coal that was put under intense pressure for a long period of time " It all seems to work. Tanner's always had a high self esteem, and as he ages -we even make him more aware of what his apraxia is and how he has overcome it - as you will read in the following -it's all in a good way. Just like in The Late Talker book we explained how to relieve frustrations in a " late talker " child -the same strategies do work for the older ones too. This is what I said to Tanner at six prior to him starting kindergarten: " Tanner when you were a little baby you had very high fevers that caused a boo boo in here. (I touched his head) But what you did was amazing Tanner! You see, most of us only use a tiny bit of our brain, and most of us learn to talk the same way -but you have somehow developed another pathway to talk using more of your brain...which actually makes you smarter than the rest of us! Now this is the thing, sometimes people who don't know just how smart you are may judge you based on how you talk and even call you names. This is because they don't feel good about themselves, or they don't feel as smart as you. So don't get angry with people like that who don't use as much of their brain as you do. And always let us know if someone ever says anything bad to you. Then I paused and said with a mock serious face/mocking voice. " Now Tanner, just because you are smarter then most other people -don't go thinking you are better than anybody else. You hear me Tanner? Tanner don't smile, you have to be nice to everybody Tanner " (that made Tanner smile too) Since we've moved from New Jersey -I now tell Tanner (stretch the truth) that if he wants to ever feel normal he can move back to New Jersey where all the kids his age just about have apraxia. I tell him that the people where we live in FL are not used to people with speech problems, so some could prejudge him, but he can prove to them just how smart he is. And he does. Like your son: Tanner knows that due to his " late talking " he has an " amazing memory " and that he is " Mr. Mathhead " Tanner was the first in his class to get the 1-12 table addition award for math last week! He is now reading some scary stories for Halloween, just completed a book report which was amazing, and we are just so proud of how great he is doing! Point being that Tanner today at 8 knows he isn't like others in regards to speech. Then again there are ways that Tanner excels over the norm. Tanner can talk -and he is typically understood. His speech impairment today is that his speech is still immature for an 8 year old. He tends to keep his sentences short. If he has a longer thought he pauses and breaks the thought up. In general, Tanner is expressive, let's you know what he wants or how he feels -but he isn't very expressive verbally. Tanner's speech ability doesn't affect Tanner's ability to have lots of friends -he's a cool kid, and a sweetheart too. Tanner's also received awards at school for helping others who are in pain, or being the only one to remember to help the teacher or other students clean up. We just saw Shark Tail a few weeks ago with two of Dakota and Tanner's friends. When Tanner wanted to describe to everyone what he loved about a movie he as usual kept his comments down to one short sentence, used some gestures and words like " So Cool! " -and ended with a question, " right? " Tanner's knows how to get others to talk -now that's his own strategy! Sounds like your son is on the same track -and he's got you on his side to keep him on the right track! ===== Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 1, 2008 Report Share Posted April 1, 2008 Nadine, I apologize. I tried very hard to be clear and say something specific, and messed up on both counts. I had absolutely no intention of calling you unempathetic or making any reference at all to your self-perception. My grammatical error was linking self acceptance and empathy. The " very basic deficit " phrase was meant only to refer to empathy, and I should have phrased that part another way, too. Everything I have read describes a kind of mind blindness, problems with mirror neurons, difficulty interpreting others' intentions--usually briefly listed as " lack of empathy " --being a universal trait in spectrum diagnoses. Maybe it is not universal, like so many other " typically autistic " traits are turning out not to be, which is how this whole thread got started. I don't have any idea. I do know that for me to some degree, and for my son to a much greater degree, understanding the perspective, experience and motivation of someone else is very difficult. Of course your choices and achievements show empathy, not to mention bravery and great character. I have the greatest admiration for what you are doing, particularly as it is extra hard for you in some ways, and it is so important. All I meant to indicate is that the pattern of being clueless/oblivious to the fact that others are feeling and experiencing something which you describe is very common (even if it's not universal) even in grownup and very bright individuals who find themselves even slightly on the spectrum. It certainly stays with me even now that I can mostly " pass " so I want to help my son recognize this challenge and help coach him to overcome it to the best of my admittedly limited ability. In future I will certainly describe " frequently observed differences " rather than " basic deficits " of the autistic mind. Sorry about that. If this needs more clearing up feel free to answer me privately, or on the board. > > Re: self acceptance and empathy which, of course, > is a very basic deficit in the autistic mind. > > I am not an expert on autism just because I have been diagnoed with > Asperger's. Every person is different. And I know that there are many > times that I am pretty clueless/oblivious to the fact that others are > feeling and/or experiencing something. But I really don't think that I > lack empathy. If I did I wouldn't have spent all of the time and > effort - which took a huge toll on me by the way - to overcome my > anxiety and represent children who needed my help. I knew that they > felt helpless because that is how I had felt when I was their age. I > did not want them to feel that way. Isn't that that empathy? Maybe > I'm wrong. Maybe it's something different. If it is the same - does > that mean I don't have autsim? I have been re-evaluated and diagnosed > at various ages. I don't think it's that simple. Maybe we make too > many general conclusions about what are " basic deficits in the autistic > mind. " > > It's true I have a problem with self-acceptance. But only because > others have not accepted me. Thank goodness my Mom did. That really > helped. As a mom myself I know that it is hard and often stressful. II > did not mean to diminish that. > > Nadine > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 1, 2008 Report Share Posted April 1, 2008 , Jeanne here. I also have to agree with your points about the person who diagnosed herself as having asperger syndrome. It seems strange to me that such a big deal is made about the diagnosis, and she doesn't want pity. For one thing I'm sure many of us have our own personality quirks, or moods. That just makes us individuals not all having aspergers. I'm sure we have all met people/or kids who are different or maybe not everyone is very socialable, are we going to call everyone as having Aspergers? > > Nadine you raise a good point about overcoming for yourself and you > are to be applauded as well one who has helped advocate for many special > needs children in your career as an attorney. We'd all like to hear > more about you. About that article/email you posted... > > As of yet there is no blood test for some of these conditions. > Asperger Syndrome in the CNN reporter was diagnosed at almost 50 (OK > 48) years old... due to her reporting on it. In her case -don't you > think someone else would have noticed it first? Her parents? Her > husband? Her many doctors all her life? And come to think of it - > speaking of her parents -she suspects her father (what is he -80?) is > autistic too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 2, 2008 Report Share Posted April 2, 2008 > I also have to agree with your points about the person who diagnosed herself ... Did she diagnose herself? I thought that someone else did. Why would she want to have AS if she doesn't? Is it trendy or something these days? Maybe I'll finally be " Cool. " :-) I certainly do diagree with her about not wanting symptoms to go away. I would get rid of mine in a heartbeat. Nadine02 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 2, 2008 Report Share Posted April 2, 2008 > I also have to agree with your points about the person who diagnosed herself ... Did she diagnose herself? I thought that someone else did. Why would she want to have AS if she doesn't? Is it trendy or something these days? Maybe I'll finally be " Cool. " :-) I certainly do diagree with her about not wanting symptoms to go away. I would get rid of mine in a heartbeat. Nadine02 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 2, 2008 Report Share Posted April 2, 2008 >We'd all like to hear more about you. Well, I personally don't think I'm very interesting. If you want to hear more about me because it tells you something about what it's like to have AS though I'm okay with that. I have had the same core symptoms since I was very little basically but they are much milder now. As a child I developed speech on time but in some ways it was atypical. I used to repeat the last word of every sentence and hum or say mmmmm under my breath constantly. I had great difficulty speaking when upset and sometimes stuttered. I develped a very large vocabulary at a very young age and did not " sound " like a child. I only talked about one or two subjects in which I was very interested. I did not engage in social conversation in a typical sense. I had many obsessive compulsive behaviors and adhered to rigid rituals and routines. If we did not do things the " right " way I became extremely upset. It caused me a lot of anxiety. I don't know why this started or why I did it. I do know that I eventually forced myself to stop by purposly doing things the " wrong " way until I could tolerate it. My sensory problems were much worse then. I hated and feared loud noise. It caused me physical pain. I hated constricting clothes and would not wear them. I could not make eye contact because I got headaches and sharp pains in my eyes when I tried for too long. As I said, these problems are milder now. Now my biggest sensory problem involves not being able to judge how far away other cars are and how fast they are approaching when I am driving. Thus, I only drive when I have to and only during the day and never in city traffic. I have never understood social cues well and I have had to watch other people and memorize what they do to blend in socially. I have memorized and practiced gestures, intonation, facial expressions, everything. Now it comes much more naturally because I have practiced so much. In new situations though I am very awkward and can suddenly seem to change from a very confident social person to someone very quiet and withdrawn which has disconcerted some people. I have tremendous social anxiety and overanalyze many encounters. I am oblivious and it upsets me if I figure out that I have upset someone - especially if I can't figure out why. I often have had to to ask other people if something I have said or done was appropriate. Hmm, what else, well I have mild dyslexia, attention defecit problems and I am extremely uncoordinated. I can only sleep if there is white noise and I wake up frequently. I have chronic neuromuscular pain and GI issues and allergies. AS only got into the DSM in 1994. As a child I had a dx of OCD, social anxiety disorder and some kind of learning disorder. As a young adult I was diagnosed with AS. Ironically, I was only seeking help for my anxiety at the time. Since then I have gotten a second opinion. It was the same. That was several years ago though. Maybe it would be different now. As for being a lawyer. I went to law school because I was extremely interested in legal history. I became a researcher for the Federal Judicial Center while still in law school and was planning to do that after I graduated until I did an internship working with abused and neglected kids, many of whom had special needs. I just felt that I wanted to help them. I knew that it would be really hard though because I have so much social anxiety and don't read cues well which is necessary in court. Somehow I managed to do a pretty good job though because I did not want to let the kids down. Unfortunately, the stress really took a toll on me though eventually, and my AS symptoms and GI issues and pain got worse again. My husband I felt that I should retire at 35. I had my son a year later. Maybe someday I will be a legal reseracher again. Who knows. I guess I'm no Temple Grandin:-) Is there anything else you wanted to know? Nadine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 2, 2008 Report Share Posted April 2, 2008 Au contraire –very interesting Nadine! Très Cool! Thank you so much for sharing as this provides some awesome insight that as parents we wouldn't know from the child's perspective. I always try (in vain) to share the side of the celiac child who gets stuck on a special diet and why not to put your child on one unless they need it –but people get pissed and don't understand that I remember it from the child's view. The child's view is something we don't know enough about when it comes to disorders like autism and apraxia and while more share about autism (as it's not in itself a verbal impairment) we are just starting to hear from the apraxic " child " I do have questions but wanted to read your post when I asked and something's up with (again) today where messages are not posting in order or for hours after they are approved –so I just did a few from memory and add to this when it shows up. (and some are showing up more than once to be approved and still not showing up which I don't ever remember happening before!) Just went to post this and yes your message is here -but I'll just start with these questions anyway. Even though not all the little children we outreach to have autism or asperger's –many have sensory issues. But don't limit your answers to sensory of course! So here are a few questions from me and I'm sure others have more. What were your favorite things to do when you were little? What did you think of Holidays or days like Halloween? What did you want to be when you grew up –or instead when did you decide to go to law school to advocate for special needs children? Was there a moment in time? Did you have a best friend or did you hang out with a group or both? If one thing could have been changed (outside of your diagnosis or family, friends things like that) what do you wish was done differently? Have you tried fish oil or vitamin E for yourself? If so -any change? How long have you had it and what do they relate the neuromuscular pain to? (and sorry to hear about that) How would you feel if today some started diagnosing the children with asperger's syndrome with Childhood Asperger's Syndrome of Sensory instead of just asperger's syndrome? (that was a joke ) ===== Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 2, 2008 Report Share Posted April 2, 2008 On or offlist can I ask, what were the therapies like in your childhood. Just curious what was available then versus now. > >We'd all like to hear more about you. > > Well, I personally don't think I'm very interesting. If you want to > hear more about me because it tells you something about what it's like > to have AS though I'm okay with that. > > I have had the same core symptoms since I was very little basically but > they are much milder now. As a child I developed speech on time but in > some ways it was atypical. I used to repeat the last word of every > sentence and hum or say mmmmm under my breath constantly. I had great > difficulty speaking when upset and sometimes stuttered. I develped a > very large vocabulary at a very young age and did not " sound " like a > child. I only talked about one or two subjects in which I was very > interested. I did not engage in social conversation in a typical sense. > > I had many obsessive compulsive behaviors and adhered to rigid rituals > and routines. If we did not do things the " right " way I became > extremely upset. It caused me a lot of anxiety. I don't know why this > started or why I did it. I do know that I eventually forced myself to > stop by purposly doing things the " wrong " way until I could tolerate it. > > My sensory problems were much worse then. I hated and feared loud > noise. It caused me physical pain. I hated constricting clothes and > would not wear them. I could not make eye contact because I got > headaches and sharp pains in my eyes when I tried for too long. As I > said, these problems are milder now. Now my biggest sensory problem > involves not being able to judge how far away other cars are and how > fast they are approaching when I am driving. Thus, I only drive when I > have to and only during the day and never in city traffic. > > I have never understood social cues well and I have had to watch other > people and memorize what they do to blend in socially. I have memorized > and practiced gestures, intonation, facial expressions, everything. > Now it comes much more naturally because I have practiced so much. In > new situations though I am very awkward and can suddenly seem to change > from a very confident social person to someone very quiet and withdrawn > which has disconcerted some people. I have tremendous social anxiety > and overanalyze many encounters. I am oblivious and it upsets me if I > figure out that I have upset someone - especially if I can't figure out > why. I often have had to to ask other people if something I have said > or done was appropriate. > > Hmm, what else, well I have mild dyslexia, attention defecit problems > and I am extremely uncoordinated. I can only sleep if there is white > noise and I wake up frequently. I have chronic neuromuscular pain and > GI issues and allergies. > > AS only got into the DSM in 1994. As a child I had a dx of OCD, social > anxiety disorder and some kind of learning disorder. As a young adult > I was diagnosed with AS. Ironically, I was only seeking help for my > anxiety at the time. Since then I have gotten a second opinion. It > was the same. That was several years ago though. Maybe it would be > different now. > > As for being a lawyer. I went to law school because I was extremely > interested in legal history. I became a researcher for the Federal > Judicial Center while still in law school and was planning to do that > after I graduated until I did an internship working with abused and > neglected kids, many of whom had special needs. I just felt that I > wanted to help them. I knew that it would be really hard though > because I have so much social anxiety and don't read cues well which is > necessary in court. Somehow I managed to do a pretty good job though > because I did not want to let the kids down. Unfortunately, the stress > really took a toll on me though eventually, and my AS symptoms and GI > issues and pain got worse again. My husband I felt that I should > retire at 35. I had my son a year later. Maybe someday I will be a > legal reseracher again. Who knows. I guess I'm no Temple Grandin:- ) > > Is there anything else you wanted to know? > > Nadine > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 3, 2008 Report Share Posted April 3, 2008 Actually, rather than answering questions about me, (I promise you that I'm not that interesting) I would like to suggest an excellent book. It is called " Send in the Idiots: Stories from the Other Side of Autism " by Kamran Nazeer. Please do not be put off by the title. It is a most respectful book. It is also at times humorous, and at times poignant. The author was diagnosed with autism as a young child and attended a school specially designed for children on the spectrum. Eventually he was mainsteamed and went on to earn both a Ph.D and a law degree. He is now a policy analyst for the British government. In the book he looks up some of his former classmates from the school to see what they are doing now. Throughout, he gives you insight about people with autism. It is really very good. Better than anything I could tell you. I'm going to take a break from writing now for awhile. I'm pretty busy these days. Take care though. Nadine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 3, 2008 Report Share Posted April 3, 2008 Too many people generalize about the autistic mind.Too many people think a child with autism has tobe either banging their head against the wall or walking in circles looking at the sky with no sense of purpose. This is 2008 and a lot of these kids are all different although they still meet the criteria for autism and if it is asd they do not meet all the criteria. More kids get diagnosed with autism because there is a lot more awareness unlike apraxia which has not gotten the same publicity but according to Sue Robbins who has autism most of the people with autism have apraxia but I know that most people with apraxia do not have autism. That is the difference eventhough my Josh has asd. McCarthy is on Oprah Friday. I got a news letter from the National Association for the Young Child today about how to talk with parents about autism. Josh has juvenile diabetes too. We are hoping for an organ transplant someday. Have a nice day. **************Planning your summer road trip? Check out AOL Travel Guides. (http://travel.aol.com/travel-guide/united-states?ncid=aoltrv00030000000016) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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