To re your VP

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

Your VP was way out of line in suggesting that she was going to document

your son's misbehavior so as to have an excuse for suspending him. This

makes me so angry that I have to calm down before thinking of what to say to

her. It reminds me of the time my son was threatened with suspension (he's

17) for leaning on a girl when she asked him not to, which she interpreted

as sexual harassment. I complained on this list about it, and a very

helpful person (was it you, ?) told me that the federal law

concerning special education, the IDEA, specifies that a child cannot be

suspended for behavior that is caused by his disability. Your VP has got

things backwards. Instead of documenting his undesirable behavior, with a

view to suspending him, she should be arranging for a functional behavior

analysis or functional behavior assessment (see this website:

www.air.org/cecp/fba/default.htm), to figure out what is triggering his

behavior, and what kind of positive (not punitive) behavior modification

plan would help him to behave in a more acceptable manner.

All that being said, I can sympathize with your son, having been a " gifted "

elementary school student myself. I can remember feeling very frustrated

when I was given assignments that didn't make sense (for example " Count as

far as you can in writing. " In other words, write " One, two, three, " etc.)

I remember writing notes to my second-grade teacher telling her I couldn't

carry out this assignment, because I could count so far that it would take

me too long. Fortunately, she understood, and gave me better assignments,

such as writing an illustrated report on how the Chinese figured out how to

manufacture silk fabric using silkworms, or making an apron for my mother.

I also hated assignments in which every child in the class was supposed to

do the same thing, in the same way. Speaking from my own childhood

experience, I suspect one reason your son's behavior may have worsened is

that he realized that the senseless assignments he was being given would

last all year long, and there was nothing he could do to escape!

What I suspect would be a much better placement for him would be with an

aide in a classroom for gifted kids. We were amazed how much my son's

behavior improved when he moved from elementary into middle school, and

again when he moved into high school. Intellectually challenging courses

were exactly what he needed to keep him busy! He still needed an aide to

help him with social interactions all the way into tenth grade, and his

social skills are far from perfect even now that he's a senior. But he's

also more articulate than he used to be. What might be driving your son

crazy is that he's bored and frustrated at school, but doesn't have the

words to describe his feelings!

Well, enough speculation. But it sounds as if asking for an FBA might be a

good first step for you to take. And forget about letting the school put

him in a self-contained classroom. In my opinion, that would be a recipe

for disaster!

I don't think your only option is to home-school your son. The public

school he attends is required by federal law to provide him with a free and

appropriate education in the least restrictive environment possible. A

self-contained classroom doesn't meet that definition.

Jill