M school

[Guest guest]

Just came back from a lecture at school given by two members of the AS org

here - my initiative.

I came out feeling something was missing.

the lecture was ok, but then the questions started from the teachers, and

mostly they were negative : but what to do when the child has a violent

outburst? what if he does not comply? " etc. I did expect this type of

questions to come up but I wish someone there had also asked ; " how do I

make it easier on him? how can I make him get more interested in studying

with the class? " ok, I dream Utopia.........

I was surprised at some of the teachers, that is, teachers I did not know

liked him but seemed to like AND understand him better than others. I saw a

teacher who really can't stand his sight to suddenly show some glimps of

understanding and even smiling at the thought of him (I think she suddenly

understood something she saw in class and realized it was actually cute

rather than defying, for the first time), I also saw the English teacher who

hates his guts (but sometimes it seems to me and other parents tahat she

hates all kids...) not listening to even one word said.

I saw the principal actually buffering questions that were going too far

and sort of keeping the tone down, but also asking " can you say that AS

means always violent outburst ? " to which of course the answer was no, and I

know where she is going from here: if they can't get him out of school on

the AS grounds , they will just claim he is violent..... that unfortunately

will send him out to a behavioural school with speed (don't worry, I will

fight it like hell).

overall, I don't know yet what this lecture has done for my son. The people

who lectured felt a) that the overall atmosphere is NOT accepting, and

that the lecture CAN help in how they perceive him. I will see where it goes

from here.

gladly, they will be on vacation soon, and will have time to think it over

and muster some positive feelings about him or totally forget......

******what really shocked me was this: if you recall at the beginning of the

year they convinced us to put him in the sped class " officially " only to get

him the resources he needed for help. he was supposed to be in the regular

class and go to the sped class as much as he needed. I was against it

claiming he would be too confused and wouldn't know where he belongs, ending

up in feeling as though he does not belong anywhere.

I kept telling them since then that he IS confused and that this is part of

the cuase of his difficulties. he says it himself : " I don't know where I

belong. if I am supposed to be a regular student in the regular class , why

am I in the sped class, and who is my teacher " . at the end of the lecture as

more and more questions came up, the people who lectured asked who was his

head teacher/ he has two: the sped head teacher and the regular class' head

teacher and they are supposed to work together, while the sped head teacher

leads the plan. the sped head teacher had left already (she apologized

ahead of time, she had another meeting, which by me was ok) , and it turned

out most teachers had no idea who his head teacher was. finally someone said

: " {he is in the sped class and she left " . two others said: " no, his head

teacher is here! " pointing to the regular class' head teacher. who

responded: " me? I am not his head teacher and he is not my student! he is

not officially listed in my class! "

there!!! the problem in a nutshell! if tehy are confused as to where he

belongs, how can he be clear about it???? how can he NOT feel anxiety there?

how can he not run like a little mouse from one class to teh other never

quite fitting in to any ??

now, I don't know why she said that. she likes him (although she is honest

enought to tell me that there are moments she is ready to pluck his feathers

in her words). it could be inside politics, prestige (sort of if they want

her to deal with him they need to give *her* the lead and not to the sped

teacher, or a general bad feeling as I know she is having tremendous

problems with the whole class (teh chidlren are rejecting ehr - that is

another story).

Oveall, like I said, i came out feeling something was missed there, and the

situation is not at all positive the way I had hoped.

waht do you think ?

F

[Guest guest]

Hi Fania,

I've been following posts. Sorry things are so crazy at school. It really

sounds like no one is on the same page... I'd feel a lot of anxiety too if I

didn't know which class I belonged to etc. This is what bothered me about the

proposed idea to have Joe in two different classes. It sounds like maybe a

vacation is the best thing and then regroup afterwards. Sometimes we just need

to take a step back before we can go forward. I like the idea of starting a

school but how difficult would that be to pull together and how many other kids

would be coming? Maybe when you get back you can call a meeting and have

everyone that works with M there and go over some was to help him that are

consistent. I think some of their questions were negative instead of trying to

find what works best, but not surprising, just disheartening.

Hang in there mom! And have a great vacation....try not to think about any of

this! Harder done than said but do try:)

Johanna

Uplift - The Beauty of Imagination in Healing <uplift@...> wrote:

Just came back from a lecture at school given by two members of the AS org

here - my initiative.

I came out feeling something was missing.

the lecture was ok, but then the questions started from the teachers, and

mostly they were negative : but what to do when the child has a violent

outburst? what if he does not comply? " etc. I did expect this type of

questions to come up but I wish someone there had also asked ; " how do I

make it easier on him? how can I make him get more interested in studying

with the class? " ok, I dream Utopia.........

I was surprised at some of the teachers, that is, teachers I did not know

liked him but seemed to like AND understand him better than others. I saw a

teacher who really can't stand his sight to suddenly show some glimps of

understanding and even smiling at the thought of him (I think she suddenly

understood something she saw in class and realized it was actually cute

rather than defying, for the first time), I also saw the English teacher who

hates his guts (but sometimes it seems to me and other parents tahat she

hates all kids...) not listening to even one word said.

I saw the principal actually buffering questions that were going too far

and sort of keeping the tone down, but also asking " can you say that AS

means always violent outburst ? " to which of course the answer was no, and I

know where she is going from here: if they can't get him out of school on

the AS grounds , they will just claim he is violent..... that unfortunately

will send him out to a behavioural school with speed (don't worry, I will

fight it like hell).

overall, I don't know yet what this lecture has done for my son. The people

who lectured felt a) that the overall atmosphere is NOT accepting, and

that the lecture CAN help in how they perceive him. I will see where it goes

from here.

gladly, they will be on vacation soon, and will have time to think it over

and muster some positive feelings about him or totally forget......

******what really shocked me was this: if you recall at the beginning of the

year they convinced us to put him in the sped class " officially " only to get

him the resources he needed for help. he was supposed to be in the regular

class and go to the sped class as much as he needed. I was against it

claiming he would be too confused and wouldn't know where he belongs, ending

up in feeling as though he does not belong anywhere.

I kept telling them since then that he IS confused and that this is part of

the cuase of his difficulties. he says it himself : " I don't know where I

belong. if I am supposed to be a regular student in the regular class , why

am I in the sped class, and who is my teacher " . at the end of the lecture as

more and more questions came up, the people who lectured asked who was his

head teacher/ he has two: the sped head teacher and the regular class' head

teacher and they are supposed to work together, while the sped head teacher

leads the plan. the sped head teacher had left already (she apologized

ahead of time, she had another meeting, which by me was ok) , and it turned

out most teachers had no idea who his head teacher was. finally someone said

: " {he is in the sped class and she left " . two others said: " no, his head

teacher is here! " pointing to the regular class' head teacher. who

responded: " me? I am not his head teacher and he is not my student! he is

not officially listed in my class! "

there!!! the problem in a nutshell! if tehy are confused as to where he

belongs, how can he be clear about it???? how can he NOT feel anxiety there?

how can he not run like a little mouse from one class to teh other never

quite fitting in to any ??

now, I don't know why she said that. she likes him (although she is honest

enought to tell me that there are moments she is ready to pluck his feathers

in her words). it could be inside politics, prestige (sort of if they want

her to deal with him they need to give *her* the lead and not to the sped

teacher, or a general bad feeling as I know she is having tremendous

problems with the whole class (teh chidlren are rejecting ehr - that is

another story).

Oveall, like I said, i came out feeling something was missed there, and the

situation is not at all positive the way I had hoped.

waht do you think ?

F