6year old autistic boy/Mom in terrible grief

[Guest guest]

I know this is an awful story. It really hits

home.This happened in March and just came to my

attention. She does not live far from me. I have

spoken with her to try to minister a word of hope to

her, and she has no idea of any of the interventions

that all of us have come to understand and depend on

so much. She has a three year old who is mild. Hug

your kids tight everybody.. they are the most precious

things God gives us!

God bless them all, Debbie Graves

Mother struggles with grief, bills after loss of

6-year-old boy

Son's absence a numbing blow

By Wehner, 6News

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Hein has been sleeping in her son's bed

since he died two weeks ago.

" It's very, very quiet. I can't deal with that. I

really can't, " she said. " I refuse to wash any of his

clothes because I can still smell him. "

On March 7, Hein watched helplessly as her son died in

her arms. She blames her son's autism and a small

rubber ball.

About 8 p.m. that Sunday, Hein was outside on the

phone for a few minutes. When she came back inside,

her son ran toward her. She knew immediately that he

was choking. The same thing had happened a couple

weeks earlier, and she used the Heimlich maneuver to

clear his airway. This time the maneuver didn't work.

" I tried it a couple of times. He was gasping for air,

so I thought we had time, " she said.

Hein and her boyfriend, Steele, decided to

take Wesley to Lawrence Memorial Hospital. Along the

way, Hein called 911.

" I told them I don't know what it is. I just know he

was choking and he's passing out, " Hein said.

The switchboard operator told Hein to stop the car and

ambulances would meet her. Steele stopped the car near

23rd and Massachusetts streets. Hein took her son out

of the car and again tried to clear his airway.

   Gwin/Journal World-Photo

Hein visits her son's grave in Lawrence's

Oak Hill Cemetery. She is struggling to pay funeral

and living expenses. Wesley Hein, 6, died March 7

after choking on a small ball.

" The events were blurry to me. I remember my boyfriend

was trying to sweep his mouth. He was trying to get

his finger around it and get it out. It wasn't food;

he could tell it was hard and plastic, " she said.

But neither Hein nor Steele could get their fingers

around the toy. They hoped the paramedics would have

better luck. But as they waited for the ambulance to

arrive, she said, Wesley began having convulsions and

seizures.

" I was panicked. Then I happened to look at him, and

he was bleeding " from his mouth, Hein said. " Here he

was, and I couldn't do anything for him. "

When the ambulance arrived, Hein said, the paramedics

tried CPR. The boy was then taken to Lawrence Memorial

Hospital. But Hein already feared the worst.

" I had a feeling when we left when I saw him bleed

that it was pretty much over. I had a gut feeling. It

was instinct, " she said.

How to help

  

Contributions may be sent to the Wesley Hein Memorial

Fund, 120 W. 13th St., Lawrence 66044.

An estimated 10 minutes went by before a doctor broke

the news to her at the hospital.

" They had IVs going. I could see the flatline -- there

was no heartbeat, " she said. " Everything was not

real. "

Hein said she had devoted the past six years of her

life to caring for Wesley, who was diagnosed with

autism. He mostly communicated through sign language,

though he could speak a few words. He attended Prairie

Park School.

Hein says her life without Wesley is quiet and empty.

 6News video: Loss of young son haunts mother

 Obituary

 Kindergartner dies after choking on ball (3-8-05)

" He loved water. He liked playing Xbox. He liked

‘Titanic' and ‘Spiderman' movies. He would watch

movies over and over again, " Hein said, laughing.

While Hein, a Haskell Indian Nations University

student, is mourning her son's loss, she is also busy

raising her 3-year-old daughter, Becky, who also has

developmental problems. Because of funeral expenses,

Hein said she was about $3,500 in debt.

Hein said she had tried explaining Wesley's death to

Becky. She fears her young daughter will forget her

big brother, so Hein keeps pictures around the house.

" She tells everybody Wesley is dead. But I tell her

he's an angel now. He can watch over us, " Hein said.

" I wish he was here. "

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

This is a terrible thing that happened. I would like to send money

but the address does not say which state this is in. Anyone know

where Lawrence is in zip code 66044?

Tina

> I know this is an awful story. It really hits

> home.This happened in March and just came to my

> attention. She does not live far from me. I have

> spoken with her to try to minister a word of hope to

> her, and she has no idea of any of the interventions

> that all of us have come to understand and depend on

> so much. She has a three year old who is mild. Hug

> your kids tight everybody.. they are the most precious

> things God gives us!

> God bless them all, Debbie Graves

>

> Mother struggles with grief, bills after loss of

> 6-year-old boy

> Son's absence a numbing blow

> By Wehner, 6News

> Wednesday, March 23, 2005

>

> Hein has been sleeping in her son's bed

> since he died two weeks ago.

>

> " It's very, very quiet. I can't deal with that. I

> really can't, " she said. " I refuse to wash any of his

> clothes because I can still smell him. "

>

>

> On March 7, Hein watched helplessly as her son died in

> her arms. She blames her son's autism and a small

> rubber ball.

>

>

> About 8 p.m. that Sunday, Hein was outside on the

> phone for a few minutes. When she came back inside,

> her son ran toward her. She knew immediately that he

> was choking. The same thing had happened a couple

> weeks earlier, and she used the Heimlich maneuver to

> clear his airway. This time the maneuver didn't work.

>

> " I tried it a couple of times. He was gasping for air,

> so I thought we had time, " she said.

>

> Hein and her boyfriend, Steele, decided to

> take Wesley to Lawrence Memorial Hospital. Along the

> way, Hein called 911.

>

> " I told them I don't know what it is. I just know he

> was choking and he's passing out, " Hein said.

>

> The switchboard operator told Hein to stop the car and

> ambulances would meet her. Steele stopped the car near

> 23rd and Massachusetts streets. Hein took her son out

> of the car and again tried to clear his airway.

>

>    Gwin/Journal World-Photo

> Hein visits her son's grave in Lawrence's

> Oak Hill Cemetery. She is struggling to pay funeral

> and living expenses. Wesley Hein, 6, died March 7

> after choking on a small ball.

>

> " The events were blurry to me. I remember my boyfriend

> was trying to sweep his mouth. He was trying to get

> his finger around it and get it out. It wasn't food;

> he could tell it was hard and plastic, " she said.

>

> But neither Hein nor Steele could get their fingers

> around the toy. They hoped the paramedics would have

> better luck. But as they waited for the ambulance to

> arrive, she said, Wesley began having convulsions and

> seizures.

>

> " I was panicked. Then I happened to look at him, and

> he was bleeding " from his mouth, Hein said. " Here he

> was, and I couldn't do anything for him. "

>

> When the ambulance arrived, Hein said, the paramedics

> tried CPR. The boy was then taken to Lawrence Memorial

> Hospital. But Hein already feared the worst.

>

> " I had a feeling when we left when I saw him bleed

> that it was pretty much over. I had a gut feeling. It

> was instinct, " she said.

>

> How to help

>   

> Contributions may be sent to the Wesley Hein Memorial

> Fund, 120 W. 13th St., Lawrence 66044.

>

> An estimated 10 minutes went by before a doctor broke

> the news to her at the hospital.

>

>

> " They had IVs going. I could see the flatline -- there

> was no heartbeat, " she said. " Everything was not

> real. "

>

> Hein said she had devoted the past six years of her

> life to caring for Wesley, who was diagnosed with

> autism. He mostly communicated through sign language,

> though he could speak a few words. He attended Prairie

> Park School.

>

> Hein says her life without Wesley is quiet and empty.

>

>  6News video: Loss of young son haunts mother

>  Obituary

>  Kindergartner dies after choking on ball (3-8-05)

>

> " He loved water. He liked playing Xbox. He liked

> `Titanic' and `Spiderman' movies. He would watch

> movies over and over again, " Hein said, laughing.

>

> While Hein, a Haskell Indian Nations University

> student, is mourning her son's loss, she is also busy

> raising her 3-year-old daughter, Becky, who also has

> developmental problems. Because of funeral expenses,

> Hein said she was about $3,500 in debt.

>

> Hein said she had tried explaining Wesley's death to

> Becky. She fears her young daughter will forget her

> big brother, so Hein keeps pictures around the house.

>

> " She tells everybody Wesley is dead. But I tell her

> he's an angel now. He can watch over us, " Hein said.

> " I wish he was here. "

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

Hi, thank you. She is in Kansas. God Bless, Debbie

Graves

--- cuch1986 <cuches@...> wrote:

> This is a terrible thing that happened. I would like

> to send money

> but the address does not say which state this is in.

> Anyone know

> where Lawrence is in zip code 66044?

>

> Tina

>

> > I know this is an awful story. It really hits

> > home.This happened in March and just came to my

> > attention. She does not live far from me. I have

> > spoken with her to try to minister a word of hope

> to

> > her, and she has no idea of any of the

> interventions

> > that all of us have come to understand and depend

> on

> > so much. She has a three year old who is mild. Hug

> > your kids tight everybody.. they are the most

> precious

> > things God gives us!

> > God bless them all, Debbie Graves

> >

> > Mother struggles with grief, bills after loss of

> > 6-year-old boy

> > Son's absence a numbing blow

> > By Wehner, 6News

> > Wednesday, March 23, 2005

> >

> > Hein has been sleeping in her son's bed

> > since he died two weeks ago.

> >

> > " It's very, very quiet. I can't deal with that. I

> > really can't, " she said. " I refuse to wash any of

> his

> > clothes because I can still smell him. "

> >

> >

> > On March 7, Hein watched helplessly as her son

> died in

> > her arms. She blames her son's autism and a small

> > rubber ball.

> >

> >

> > About 8 p.m. that Sunday, Hein was outside on the

> > phone for a few minutes. When she came back

> inside,

> > her son ran toward her. She knew immediately that

> he

> > was choking. The same thing had happened a couple

> > weeks earlier, and she used the Heimlich maneuver

> to

> > clear his airway. This time the maneuver didn't

> work.

> >

> > " I tried it a couple of times. He was gasping for

> air,

> > so I thought we had time, " she said.

> >

> > Hein and her boyfriend, Steele, decided to

> > take Wesley to Lawrence Memorial Hospital. Along

> the

> > way, Hein called 911.

> >

> > " I told them I don't know what it is. I just know

> he

> > was choking and he's passing out, " Hein said.

> >

> > The switchboard operator told Hein to stop the car

> and

> > ambulances would meet her. Steele stopped the car

> near

> > 23rd and Massachusetts streets. Hein took her son

> out

> > of the car and again tried to clear his airway.

> >

> >    Gwin/Journal World-Photo

> > Hein visits her son's grave in

> Lawrence's

> > Oak Hill Cemetery. She is struggling to pay

> funeral

> > and living expenses. Wesley Hein, 6, died March 7

> > after choking on a small ball.

> >

> > " The events were blurry to me. I remember my

> boyfriend

> > was trying to sweep his mouth. He was trying to

> get

> > his finger around it and get it out. It wasn't

> food;

> > he could tell it was hard and plastic, " she said.

> >

> > But neither Hein nor Steele could get their

> fingers

> > around the toy. They hoped the paramedics would

> have

> > better luck. But as they waited for the ambulance

> to

> > arrive, she said, Wesley began having convulsions

> and

> > seizures.

> >

> > " I was panicked. Then I happened to look at him,

> and

> > he was bleeding " from his mouth, Hein said. " Here

> he

> > was, and I couldn't do anything for him. "

> >

> > When the ambulance arrived, Hein said, the

> paramedics

> > tried CPR. The boy was then taken to Lawrence

> Memorial

> > Hospital. But Hein already feared the worst.

> >

> > " I had a feeling when we left when I saw him bleed

> > that it was pretty much over. I had a gut feeling.

> It

> > was instinct, " she said.

> >

> > How to help

> >   

> > Contributions may be sent to the Wesley Hein

> Memorial

> > Fund, 120 W. 13th St., Lawrence 66044.

> >

> > An estimated 10 minutes went by before a doctor

> broke

> > the news to her at the hospital.

> >

> >

> > " They had IVs going. I could see the flatline --

> there

> > was no heartbeat, " she said. " Everything was not

> > real. "

> >

> > Hein said she had devoted the past six years of

> her

> > life to caring for Wesley, who was diagnosed with

> > autism. He mostly communicated through sign

> language,

> > though he could speak a few words. He attended

> Prairie

> > Park School.

> >

> > Hein says her life without Wesley is quiet and

> empty.

> >

> >  6News video: Loss of young son haunts mother

> >  Obituary

> >  Kindergartner dies after choking on ball (3-8-05)

> >

> > " He loved water. He liked playing Xbox. He liked

> > `Titanic' and `Spiderman' movies. He would watch

> > movies over and over again, " Hein said, laughing.

> >

> > While Hein, a Haskell Indian Nations University

> > student, is mourning her son's loss, she is also

> busy

> > raising her 3-year-old daughter, Becky, who also

> has

> > developmental problems. Because of funeral

> expenses,

> > Hein said she was about $3,500 in debt.

> >

> > Hein said she had tried explaining Wesley's death

> to

> > Becky. She fears her young daughter will forget

> her

> > big brother, so Hein keeps pictures around the

> house.

> >

> > " She tells everybody Wesley is dead. But I tell

> her

> > he's an angel now. He can watch over us, " Hein

> said.

> > " I wish he was here. "

> >

> > __________________________________________________

> >

[Guest guest]

I thought maybe I would post her email.That is

loria@... Just in case some want to speak out

in support. She would be very glad to hear from anyone

who has a kind word. She is really having a very hard

time. Again, thank you. Debbie

--- Debbie Graves <gravesfmly@...> wrote:

> Hi, thank you. She is in Kansas. God Bless, Debbie

> Graves

>

>

> --- cuch1986 <cuches@...> wrote:

>

> > This is a terrible thing that happened. I would

> like

> > to send money

> > but the address does not say which state this is

> in.

> > Anyone know

> > where Lawrence is in zip code 66044?

> >

> > Tina

> >

> > > I know this is an awful story. It really hits

> > > home.This happened in March and just came to my

> > > attention. She does not live far from me. I have

> > > spoken with her to try to minister a word of

> hope

> > to

> > > her, and she has no idea of any of the

> > interventions

> > > that all of us have come to understand and

> depend

> > on

> > > so much. She has a three year old who is mild.

> Hug

> > > your kids tight everybody.. they are the most

> > precious

> > > things God gives us!

> > > God bless them all, Debbie Graves

> > >

> > > Mother struggles with grief, bills after loss of

> > > 6-year-old boy

> > > Son's absence a numbing blow

> > > By Wehner, 6News

> > > Wednesday, March 23, 2005

> > >

> > > Hein has been sleeping in her son's

> bed

> > > since he died two weeks ago.

> > >

> > > " It's very, very quiet. I can't deal with that.

> I

> > > really can't, " she said. " I refuse to wash any

> of

> > his

> > > clothes because I can still smell him. "

> > >

> > >

> > > On March 7, Hein watched helplessly as her son

> > died in

> > > her arms. She blames her son's autism and a

> small

> > > rubber ball.

> > >

> > >

> > > About 8 p.m. that Sunday, Hein was outside on

> the

> > > phone for a few minutes. When she came back

> > inside,

> > > her son ran toward her. She knew immediately

> that

> > he

> > > was choking. The same thing had happened a

> couple

> > > weeks earlier, and she used the Heimlich

> maneuver

> > to

> > > clear his airway. This time the maneuver didn't

> > work.

> > >

> > > " I tried it a couple of times. He was gasping

> for

> > air,

> > > so I thought we had time, " she said.

> > >

> > > Hein and her boyfriend, Steele, decided

> to

> > > take Wesley to Lawrence Memorial Hospital. Along

> > the

> > > way, Hein called 911.

> > >

> > > " I told them I don't know what it is. I just

> know

> > he

> > > was choking and he's passing out, " Hein said.

> > >

> > > The switchboard operator told Hein to stop the

> car

> > and

> > > ambulances would meet her. Steele stopped the

> car

> > near

> > > 23rd and Massachusetts streets. Hein took her

> son

> > out

> > > of the car and again tried to clear his airway.

> > >

> > >    Gwin/Journal World-Photo

> > > Hein visits her son's grave in

> > Lawrence's

> > > Oak Hill Cemetery. She is struggling to pay

> > funeral

> > > and living expenses. Wesley Hein, 6, died March

> 7

> > > after choking on a small ball.

> > >

> > > " The events were blurry to me. I remember my

> > boyfriend

> > > was trying to sweep his mouth. He was trying to

> > get

> > > his finger around it and get it out. It wasn't

> > food;

> > > he could tell it was hard and plastic, " she

> said.

> > >

> > > But neither Hein nor Steele could get their

> > fingers

> > > around the toy. They hoped the paramedics would

> > have

> > > better luck. But as they waited for the

> ambulance

> > to

> > > arrive, she said, Wesley began having

> convulsions

> > and

> > > seizures.

> > >

> > > " I was panicked. Then I happened to look at him,

> > and

> > > he was bleeding " from his mouth, Hein said.

> " Here

> > he

> > > was, and I couldn't do anything for him. "

> > >

> > > When the ambulance arrived, Hein said, the

> > paramedics

> > > tried CPR. The boy was then taken to Lawrence

> > Memorial

> > > Hospital. But Hein already feared the worst.

> > >

> > > " I had a feeling when we left when I saw him

> bleed

> > > that it was pretty much over. I had a gut

> feeling.

> > It

> > > was instinct, " she said.

> > >

> > > How to help

> > >   

> > > Contributions may be sent to the Wesley Hein

> > Memorial

> > > Fund, 120 W. 13th St., Lawrence 66044.

> > >

> > > An estimated 10 minutes went by before a doctor

> > broke

> > > the news to her at the hospital.

> > >

> > >

> > > " They had IVs going. I could see the flatline --

> > there

> > > was no heartbeat, " she said. " Everything was not

> > > real. "

> > >

> > > Hein said she had devoted the past six years of

> > her

> > > life to caring for Wesley, who was diagnosed

> with

> > > autism. He mostly communicated through sign

> > language,

> > > though he could speak a few words. He attended

> > Prairie

> > > Park School.

> > >

> > > Hein says her life without Wesley is quiet and

> > empty.

> > >

> > >  6News video: Loss of young son haunts mother

> > >  Obituary

> > >  Kindergartner dies after choking on ball

> (3-8-05)

> > >

> > > " He loved water. He liked playing Xbox. He liked

> > > `Titanic' and `Spiderman' movies. He would watch

> > > movies over and over again, " Hein said,

> laughing.

> > >

> > > While Hein, a Haskell Indian Nations University

> > > student, is mourning her son's loss, she is also

> > busy

> > > raising her 3-year-old daughter, Becky, who also

> > has

> > > developmental problems. Because of funeral

> > expenses,

> > > Hein said she was about $3,500 in debt.

>

=== message truncated ===

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

> Kansas.

> From: " cuch1986 " <cuches@...>

> Date: 2005/05/02 Mon AM 05:51:12 EDT

>

> Subject: [ ] Re: 6year old autistic boy/Mom in terrible grief

>

>

[Guest guest]

Please resend the body of this message. Thx, Sweetie

[ ] Re: 6year old autistic boy/Mom in terrible grief

>

>

[Guest guest]

--- Debbie Graves <gravesfmly@...> wrote:

> Date: Sun, 1 May 2005 20:52:45 -0700 (PDT)

> From: Debbie Graves <gravesfmly@...>

> Subject: 6year old autistic boy/Mom in terrible

> grief

> ,

>

>

> I know this is an awful story. It really hits

> home.This happened in March and just came to my

> attention. She does not live far from me. I have

> spoken with her to try to minister a word of hope to

> her, and she has no idea of any of the

> interventions

> that all of us have come to understand and depend on

> so much. She has a three year old who is mild. Hug

> your kids tight everybody.. they are the most

> precious

> things God gives us!

> God bless them all, Debbie Graves

>

> Mother struggles with grief, bills after loss of

> 6-year-old boy

> Son's absence a numbing blow

> By Wehner, 6News

> Wednesday, March 23, 2005

>

> Hein has been sleeping in her son's bed

> since he died two weeks ago.

>

> " It's very, very quiet. I can't deal with that. I

> really can't, " she said. " I refuse to wash any of

> his

> clothes because I can still smell him. "

>

>

> On March 7, Hein watched helplessly as her son died

> in

> her arms. She blames her son's autism and a small

> rubber ball.

>

>

> About 8 p.m. that Sunday, Hein was outside on the

> phone for a few minutes. When she came back inside,

> her son ran toward her. She knew immediately that he

> was choking. The same thing had happened a couple

> weeks earlier, and she used the Heimlich maneuver to

> clear his airway. This time the maneuver didn't

> work.

>

> " I tried it a couple of times. He was gasping for

> air,

> so I thought we had time, " she said.

>

> Hein and her boyfriend, Steele, decided to

> take Wesley to Lawrence Memorial Hospital. Along the

> way, Hein called 911.

>

> " I told them I don't know what it is. I just know he

> was choking and he's passing out, " Hein said.

>

> The switchboard operator told Hein to stop the car

> and

> ambulances would meet her. Steele stopped the car

> near

> 23rd and Massachusetts streets. Hein took her son

> out

> of the car and again tried to clear his airway.

>

>    Gwin/Journal World-Photo

> Hein visits her son's grave in Lawrence's

> Oak Hill Cemetery. She is struggling to pay funeral

> and living expenses. Wesley Hein, 6, died March 7

> after choking on a small ball.

>

> " The events were blurry to me. I remember my

> boyfriend

> was trying to sweep his mouth. He was trying to get

> his finger around it and get it out. It wasn't food;

> he could tell it was hard and plastic, " she said.

>

> But neither Hein nor Steele could get their fingers

> around the toy. They hoped the paramedics would have

> better luck. But as they waited for the ambulance to

> arrive, she said, Wesley began having convulsions

> and

> seizures.

>

> " I was panicked. Then I happened to look at him, and

> he was bleeding " from his mouth, Hein said. " Here he

> was, and I couldn't do anything for him. "

>

> When the ambulance arrived, Hein said, the

> paramedics

> tried CPR. The boy was then taken to Lawrence

> Memorial

> Hospital. But Hein already feared the worst.

>

> " I had a feeling when we left when I saw him bleed

> that it was pretty much over. I had a gut feeling.

> It

> was instinct, " she said.

>

> How to help

>   

> Contributions may be sent to the Wesley Hein

> Memorial

> Fund, 120 W. 13th St., Lawrence 66044.

>

> An estimated 10 minutes went by before a doctor

> broke

> the news to her at the hospital.

>

>

> " They had IVs going. I could see the flatline --

> there

> was no heartbeat, " she said. " Everything was not

> real. "

>

> Hein said she had devoted the past six years of her

> life to caring for Wesley, who was diagnosed with

> autism. He mostly communicated through sign

> language,

> though he could speak a few words. He attended

> Prairie

> Park School.

>

> Hein says her life without Wesley is quiet and

> empty.

>

>  6News video: Loss of young son haunts mother

>  Obituary

>  Kindergartner dies after choking on ball (3-8-05)

>

> " He loved water. He liked playing Xbox. He liked

> ‘Titanic' and ‘Spiderman' movies. He would watch

> movies over and over again, " Hein said, laughing.

>

> While Hein, a Haskell Indian Nations University

> student, is mourning her son's loss, she is also

> busy

> raising her 3-year-old daughter, Becky, who also has

> developmental problems. Because of funeral expenses,

> Hein said she was about $3,500 in debt.

>

> Hein said she had tried explaining Wesley's death to

> Becky. She fears her young daughter will forget her

> big brother, so Hein keeps pictures around the

> house.

>

> " She tells everybody Wesley is dead. But I tell her

> he's an angel now. He can watch over us, " Hein said.

> " I wish he was here. "

>

> __________________________________________________

>