Re: Any negativity towards the helmet?

August 17, 2008

Hi Alix,

I'm a very old mom :-) Most of our friends were very nice about it,

but my brother in law and his wife made it pretty clear that they

didn't think she should wear it. Then when it took a little longer

than expected they said " Oh, she's still in that thing " (why should

they care?). It is frustrating, but you are doing what is best so

try not to let it get to you. I think it is more ignorance that being

bad people. Most people know very little about plagio, including our

doctors which is why the don't even help us prevent it in the first

place (although it isn't always possible to prevent). Hang in there.

-christine

sydney 2.5 yrs starband grad

>

> Hey everyone,

>

> I'm a pretty young mother (20) and most of the people I am friends with

> are around my age. It seems like every time I am on the outs with one

> of them they say things about my son and his helmet. I know that makes

> them horrible people and worse friends! I'm just wondering if anyone

> else has dealt with negative comments or reactions like this and how? I

> would never talk about anyone's child, especially not in a ridiculous

> arguement, and I can't seem to understand why every person I disagree

> with sinks so low! Any suggustions on how to not feel so offended or

> support would be nice!

>

> -Alix

> Mom of Nicolas S 8 mon, plagio/tort. (starband 4 mon)

>

August 17, 2008

Thank you! I'm trying...I know that people are ignorant about it, especially drs! But I just can't believe how many times I've been hearing mean things about it. Strangers are nice about it and my family of course but it's such a cheap shot. I guess I just didn't expect it and it seems to be happening a lot. I can understand people assuming that it is b.c of a mental handicap but to go out of your way to be hurtful is insane! I really hope that soon more people will catch on and understand that it's cosmetic and not a reflection of bad parenting or, most of the time, not avoidable! It's really awesome that we have this option to help our children, its just really sad that it sets them up for judgement and hurt.

From: christineashok <christineashok@...>Subject: Re: Any negativity towards the helmet?Plagiocephaly Date: Sunday, August 17, 2008, 3:17 PM

Hi Alix,I'm a very old mom :-) Most of our friends were very nice about it,but my brother in law and his wife made it pretty clear that theydidn't think she should wear it. Then when it took a little longerthan expected they said "Oh, she's still in that thing" (why shouldthey care?). It is frustrating, but you are doing what is best sotry not to let it get to you. I think it is more ignorance that beingbad people. Most people know very little about plagio, including ourdoctors which is why the don't even help us prevent it in the firstplace (although it isn't always possible to prevent). Hang in there.-christinesydney 2.5 yrs starband grad>> Hey everyone, > > I'm a pretty young mother (20) and most of the people I am

friends with > are around my age. It seems like every time I am on the outs with one > of them they say things about my son and his helmet. I know that makes > them horrible people and worse friends! I'm just wondering if anyone > else has dealt with negative comments or reactions like this and how? I > would never talk about anyone's child, especially not in a ridiculous > arguement, and I can't seem to understand why every person I disagree > with sinks so low! Any suggustions on how to not feel so offended or > support would be nice!> > -Alix> Mom of Nicolas S 8 mon, plagio/tort. (starband 4 mon)>

August 18, 2008

Alix,

I want to give you a hug. I know exactly how you are feeling. My son

has his appointment today for a head check and will be getting a

referral to see someone to discuss a band. I am also nervous about

what other people will think... but have to remember its necessary.

Anyways, I dont have advice, just wanted to let you know I have the

same fears. I am 26, my husband is 29 and this is our first. We are

also the first of our friends to have a child. Not that that really

matters. I am also afraid people will think we have let our son just

lay around making his head worse- which couldnt be farther from the truth.

Anyway, this isnt about me, its about you. Try not to worry about

other people. Your negativity and sensitivity will be reflected by

others at the worst moments. You ARE doing the right think for your

child. As someone here said to me- if your child had crooked teeth

you would put braces on them without a second though. Well, its a

crooked head and you are straightening it out. I think its just as

important.

Take Care

Jan

August 18, 2008

Alix,

It shows a great strength of character to go against the grain and you should be proud that you are donig exactly what any great mother would do. I am sorry your friends have let you down so. Whoever said it is right, they are toxic and it will be good to leave them behind.

Don't be too hard on your family (yet). My sister lives 12 hours away and had never met my son. While she was supportive she never really understood the reasons for the band and pt (he also has tort). Photo's just didn't do it justice. As soon as she laid eyes on my son for the first time, she understood. I hope your family responds the same way.

I have no idea what your situation is/will be when you get to Rochester, but I can tell you where I have met some of the most supportive and giving people that i know. I belong to the MOMS Club. It's a group for stay or work at home Moms (website: http://www.momsclub.org/join.html). Every chapter is different, but it might be worth checking out. I am down in the Hudson Valley region of NY, but I have the email address for the NYS coordinator; she should be able to put you in touch with the local Rochester group. I can email you privately with her info if you like.