Green Garden Grass snakes

[Guest guest]

Green Garden Grass snakes can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not

rattlesnakes. A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted

plants, and during a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of

them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze. It turned out

that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants

and when it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife saw it go

under the sofa. She let out a very loud scream.

The husband who was taking a shower ran out into the living room naked

to see what the problem was. She told him there was a snake under the

sofa. He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it.

About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him in the butt.

He thought the snake had bitten him and he fainted. His wife thought

he had a heart attack, so she called an ambulance. The attendants

rushed in and loaded him on the stre! tcher and started carrying him

out. About that time the snake came out from under the sofa and the

Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the

stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why he is in the

hospital.

The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she

called on a neighbor man. He volunteered to capture the snake. He

armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the

couch. Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down

on the sofa in relief. But in relaxing, her hand dangled in between

the cushions, where she felt the snake wriggling around. She screamed

and fainted, the snake rushed back under the sofa, and the neighbor

man, seeing her laying there passed out tried to use CPR to revive

her.

The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the

grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and

slammed her husband in t! he back of the head with a bag of canned

goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it

needed stitches. An ambulance was again called and it was determined

that the injury required hospitalization.

The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor

lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed he

had been bitten by the snake. She went to the kitchen, brought back a

small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.

By now the police had arrived. They saw the unconscious man, smelled

the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were

about to arrest them all, when the two women tried to explain how it

all happened over a little green snake.

They called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing

wife. Just then the little snake crawled out from under the couch. One

of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it. He missed the snake and

hit the leg of the end table that was on one side of the sofa. The

table fell over and the lamp on it shattered and as the bulb broke, it

started a fire in the drapes. The other policeman tried to beat out

the flames and fell through the window into the yard on top of the

family dog, who startled, jumped up and raced out into the street,

where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked

police car and set it on fire.

Meanwhile the burning drapes had spread to the walls and the entire

house was blazing. Neighbors had called the fire department and the

arriving fire-truck had started raising his ladder as they were

halfway down the street. The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires

and put out the electricity and disconnected the telephones in a

ten-square city block area.

Time passed -----------------

Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was rebuilt, the

p! olice acquired a new car, and all was right with their world -------

About a year later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced

a cold snap for that night. The husband asked his wife if she thought

they should bring in their plants for the night.

She shot him.

[Guest guest]

Green Garden Grass snakes can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not

rattlesnakes. A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted

plants, and during a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of

them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze. It turned out

that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants

and when it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife saw it go

under the sofa. She let out a very loud scream.

The husband who was taking a shower ran out into the living room naked

to see what the problem was. She told him there was a snake under the

sofa. He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it.

About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him in the butt.

He thought the snake had bitten him and he fainted. His wife thought

he had a heart attack, so she called an ambulance. The attendants

rushed in and loaded him on the stre! tcher and started carrying him

out. About that time the snake came out from under the sofa and the

Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the

stretcher. That's when the man broke his leg and why he is in the

hospital.

The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she

called on a neighbor man. He volunteered to capture the snake. He

armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the

couch. Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down

on the sofa in relief. But in relaxing, her hand dangled in between

the cushions, where she felt the snake wriggling around. She screamed

and fainted, the snake rushed back under the sofa, and the neighbor

man, seeing her laying there passed out tried to use CPR to revive

her.

The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the

grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and

slammed her husband in t! he back of the head with a bag of canned

goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it

needed stitches. An ambulance was again called and it was determined

that the injury required hospitalization.

The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor

lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed he

had been bitten by the snake. She went to the kitchen, brought back a

small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.

By now the police had arrived. They saw the unconscious man, smelled

the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were

about to arrest them all, when the two women tried to explain how it

all happened over a little green snake.

They called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing

wife. Just then the little snake crawled out from under the couch. One

of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it. He missed the snake and

hit the leg of the end table that was on one side of the sofa. The

table fell over and the lamp on it shattered and as the bulb broke, it

started a fire in the drapes. The other policeman tried to beat out

the flames and fell through the window into the yard on top of the

family dog, who startled, jumped up and raced out into the street,

where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked

police car and set it on fire.

Meanwhile the burning drapes had spread to the walls and the entire

house was blazing. Neighbors had called the fire department and the

arriving fire-truck had started raising his ladder as they were

halfway down the street. The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires

and put out the electricity and disconnected the telephones in a

ten-square city block area.

Time passed -----------------

Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was rebuilt, the

p! olice acquired a new car, and all was right with their world -------

About a year later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced

a cold snap for that night. The husband asked his wife if she thought

they should bring in their plants for the night.

She shot him.