Re: Lazy is as Lazy does

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 1/21/03 2:32:39 PM Pacific Standard Time,

Graduate-OSSG writes:

> I once had a discussion with my neighbors when I was a stay at home Mom with

> preschool kids. I complimented them on their clean and orderly house and

> told them that I hated housework. Each one said they hated housework too

> but

> they loved the feeling when it is done and looks so good. I told them I

> didn't get that feeling, that I only feel more depressed.

>

> It was simple, when they were young and they did something, their moms

> complimented them. When I was young and completed a task, my mother

> criticized it and called me a lazy slob and, this is true, told me over and

> over that no man would ever want me.

>

> Of course like others, after many years of therapy, I know better, but I

> may

> never get the good feelings I get when I work outside of the house.

>

> My teachers at school and my employers always appreciated my hard work.

>

> My 2 cents.

>

>

>

> Fay Bayuk

> 300/175

> 10/23/01

> Dr

>

>

>

Wow Fay,

this really hit home with me. I'm sitting here feeling like I just had the

lights turned on in a very dark room.

You know I have the same problem. My mom was always very critical, and I

think I still keep that in my head. I find it very hard to feel good about

the things I've done, and always feel like I need to do better. It seems to

be a never ending battle.

I know in my 40 year old brain that when I criticize myself it's not

rational. I'm juggle more things that most people I know could possibly do.

Yet it's so hard not to expect more. It's not until I read a post like yours

that I can stand back and see where I am.

perhaps that's why I have been so hard on myself about my weight loss. I

think i like beating myself up, cuz that's what my mother did. No matter

what I did, I could have done this or that a little better.

Thank you so much for sharing that! You have opened my eyes to something I

didn't see.

I need to realize that I am doing wonderful, fabulous things and I'm doing a

great job! The best I can possibly do right now!

Thank you!

Liz