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In a message dated 12/6/2003 6:48:49 PM Central Standard Time,

wlslori@... writes:

not me! my lanky father-in-law, who's visiting us for a few weeks,

is watching what i eat. or what i'm NOT eating. for dinner i had a

soyburger patty w/ cheese. you should've seen him! mr food patrol!

what's that about?

lori h.

This is the kind of thing that really makes me ill!!!!!!!! If people would

worry about themselves and their rudeness they would be busy all the dam* time!

Wolfie

Leeds, Alabama

" Keep It Real & Off the Top "

Lap Rny & Choly

Dr. Lee Schmitt

Medical Center East

August 27,2003

336/271/200

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I went to work the other day ( I work in a school cafeteria) and we has peas

on the salad bar, so I went and get my 2 oz. and sat down to eat and this one

lady stood up to see what I was eating in my bowl. And she was across the

table. Mad me mad, I looked at the lady beside me and said what the heck is

everyone looking at my food for. She about died laughing. I wondered what her

problem was..

Pam

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In a message dated 12/6/2003 7:47:57 PM Central Standard Time,

Twinsmommy42@... writes:

I went to work the other day ( I work in a school cafeteria) and we has peas

on the salad bar, so I went and get my 2 oz. and sat down to eat and this

one

lady stood up to see what I was eating in my bowl. And she was across the

table. Mad me mad, I looked at the lady beside me and said what the heck is

everyone looking at my food for. She about died laughing. I wondered what

her

problem was..

Pam

This is the time that you look at them and tell them their ignorance is

showing. My gosh it never ceases to amaze me how low the intelligence level goes

with these people. My gosh! Totally amazing absolutely totally

amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would love to grab ahold of their neck and slam dunk them

into the

floor. Stupid morons! Ok. I feel better now. Now maybe I will say how I really

feel, lol.

Wolfie

Leeds, Alabama

" Keep It Real & Off the Top "

Lap Rny & Choly

Dr. Lee Schmitt

Medical Center East

August 27,2003

336/271/200

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In a message dated 12/6/2003 7:57:06 PM Central Standard Time,

toibox_success@... writes:

my lanky father-in-law, who's visiting us for a few weeks,

Hey Lori,

One thing I did forget to mention when you said your father in law was

visiting for a few weeks brings to mind what my mother always says...company is

like fish...it all gets to stinking beyond three days, lol. I know me well

enough a few weeks and I would definitely be hurting Mr. Food Patrol's feelings.

Just keepin it real thats all I know,lol.

Wolfie

Leeds, Alabama

" Keep It Real & Off the Top "

Lap Rny & Choly

Dr. Lee Schmitt

Medical Center East

August 27,2003

336/271/200

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not me! my lanky father-in-law, who's visiting us for a few weeks,

is watching what i eat. or what i'm NOT eating. for dinner i had a

soyburger patty w/ cheese. you should've seen him! mr food patrol!

what's that about?

lori h.

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Does he comment on what you eat or just make it obvious that he's

watching? I have people asking all the time " can you eat that? "

Well, I can eat anything I want to these days. Whether I do or not

is another matter.

Toi

> not me! my lanky father-in-law, who's visiting us for a few weeks,

> is watching what i eat. or what i'm NOT eating. for dinner i had

a

> soyburger patty w/ cheese. you should've seen him! mr food patrol!

> what's that about?

> lori h.

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Along this same lines...sort of....

Last night my family and I went out to Mazzio's Pizza with our business

partner (just for fun...no business involved) and I ordered grilled

chicken fettuccini...I know what you're thinking and no, I did not eat

any of the pasta, just the chicken...Anyway, (the partner) said

my eating put him to shame. I was like , what? And he went on to explain

that he felt bad that he was sitting here downing 4 or 5 slices of pizza

while I was eating 6 pieces of grilled chicken strips --he felt like he

needed to stop eating or something. Now is that weird or what?

T.

Lap RNY 6/20/03

432/305/170

Houston, Dr. Adam Naaman

Visit my homepage at http://users3.ev1.net/~leeds/

" I will find my way, I can go the distance. I'll be there someday if I

can be strong, I know every mile will be worth my while, I would go most

anywhere to fell like I belong. "

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Geez, I thought it was just me. Every time I decided to " diet " I would get

the constant questions, " can you eat that. " It had always felt like a

judgment. I hate it. I wish I knew why others do this.

Joan C, Calif.

LAP RNY 11/18/03

Dr. Higa, Fresno, CA

282/254/140

who needs the scrutiny?

not me! my lanky father-in-law, who's visiting us for a few weeks,

is watching what i eat. or what i'm NOT eating. for dinner i had a

soyburger patty w/ cheese. you should've seen him! mr food patrol!

what's that about?

lori h.

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It is a funny world...before my surgery when I ordered 2 enchiladas,

and rice and beans and basically stuffed myself with chips and salsa

before the meal ever got there, no one asked me if I could eat

something...now when I attend a lunch function everyone at the table

is obsessed with what I can eat...I took a chip(mind you, one chip

that took me 5 bites to eat) and some freak had the nerve to ask me

if I could eat it...my response was, " well I am. " Whatever...the only

bad part about dipping a chip is the courtesy of only dipping

once...but on Thankgiving my nephew wanted some chips and dip and I

stole one and he told me double-dipping is the best! People are so

rude!!!

Hannah

> not me! my lanky father-in-law, who's visiting us for a few weeks,

> is watching what i eat. or what i'm NOT eating. for dinner i had

a

> soyburger patty w/ cheese. you should've seen him! mr food patrol!

> what's that about?

> lori h.

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It is going to be all down scales from now on. Don't let what others do

hinder your success. You are doing this for all the right reasons and we are

all

here for you.

A. B.

LAP RNY 3/22/03

Dr. Steve Weinstein, MD.

Mobile, Alabama

BMI 65/47

386/281-105LBS.

59 years old

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You know I think everyone should mind thier own business if they

dont know whats going on or what you have been thru.

I know this past weekend I had the same ordeal..I went out with my

mom and her friend to do a lil Christmas shopping and they wanted to

go eat Chinese..I told them I cant eat that..so they settled on

going to a Mexican resturant..So I order refried beans

w/cheese...and they looked ant me and asked " Is that all your going

to eat? " I said yes and you know that I cant eat alot...My mom made

the comment that I needed to started eating more...I just looked at

her and made a face...She doesnt understand that I cant eat like I

use too and that I have to follow Drs orders and what I use to eat

may make me sick now...I am back on liquids till I see the Dr

tuesday, and we will go from there,,,

But I mean golly what do people expect...and It irritates me to

death for someone to sit there and stare at you while you eat...and

YES, I get, " Can you eat that " or " Is that all you are going to

eat " ...ALL THE TIME!!! ugghhhh!

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,

Same thing happened to me over Thanksgiving at my mother's. She's one of

those fru-fru kind of people who even though it's just a few family

members, we have to use the good china and have the entire table set

like it's a formal dinner. Anyway, before we all sat down I removed the

dinner plate and put it back in the cabinet so that I would just have

the salad plate in front of me and she got really pi**ed that I 'ruined'

her nice table. I told her that I didn't need the big plate in front of

me and that I wouldn't be eating that much but it didn't satisfy her.

Then when I went to take food, I had two or three small slices of

turkey, 1 tsp of mashed potatoes and 3 small pieces of sweet potatoes (I

felt obligated because even after I told her I couldn't have them, she

made them specially for me with Splenda). I only finished the turkey and

1 piece of sweet potato and she was like, " Is that all you're going to

eat? You need to eat more than that. " and I just couldn't get it through

her head that I couldn't eat more than that...She just does not

understand. I have said all along that people who aren't in the same

boat as you are just can't fathom what we go through on a daily basis.

How do we get through this?

T.

Lap RNY 6/20/03

432/305/170

Houston, Dr. Adam Naaman

Visit my homepage at http://users3.ev1.net/~leeds/>

http://users3.ev1.net/~leeds/

" I will find my way, I can go the distance. I'll be there someday if I

can be strong, I know every mile will be worth my while, I would go most

anywhere to fell like I belong. "

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I believe I've made this confession to all of you before.... I was " HORRIBLE "

.... really really awful regarding ... asking what my best friend ( who had

the procedure before me ) ... could eat, couldn't eat .. how much did she lose

today ... how much did she exercise today .. what did she drink today .. how

often... blah blah blah

Now mind you, I am a well behaved 46yr old Mother of three older children,

who's Mother taught her that " we have an inside voice and an outside voice " ...

" and we dont let other people hear the inside voice " ... " because its not

polite " .

So, of course .... I knew better.

Still, I had to ask, ask, ask .. pester my beloved friend... because it was

sooooooooo 'other world " .. so facinating....experiencing HER lose weight ..

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FAST.

Anyway ... I know its rude .. I know people should mind their own business

regarding what we eat, what we dont eat ....... but because I myself was such a

pest and know too what it felt like .... to be looking from the outside.... in

..... thinking that it was somewhat of an absolute miracle ......seeing my

best friend .. suddenly, eat like a bird ...

well ... I try to give others the benefit of the doubt...

Skinny wishes from Mandy in CA

275/150/126

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Well, after reading a lot of these incidents, it made me angry. Just now I

came up with a great comeback for me to say when it happens to me. " You

worry about what you're eating, and I'll take care of myself. " I would

have never said something like this to someone before, just keep quiet. But

I don't want to be wishy-washy about it, and the people I would eat out with

all know about the surgery and know what I need to eat. Sounds pretty easy

in the frame of mind I'm in right now. I'll see if it works when the

opportunity presents itself.

Joan

lap RNY 11/18/03

Dr. Higa, Fresno, CA

282/253/140

RE: Re: who needs the scrutiny?

,

Same thing happened to me over Thanksgiving at my mother's. She's one of

those fru-fru kind of people who even though it's just a few family

members, we have to use the good china and have the entire table set

like it's a formal dinner. Anyway, before we all sat down I removed the

dinner plate and put it back in the cabinet so that I would just have

the salad plate in front of me and she got really pi**ed that I 'ruined'

her nice table. I told her that I didn't need the big plate in front of

me and that I wouldn't be eating that much but it didn't satisfy her.

Then when I went to take food, I had two or three small slices of

turkey, 1 tsp of mashed potatoes and 3 small pieces of sweet potatoes (I

felt obligated because even after I told her I couldn't have them, she

made them specially for me with Splenda). I only finished the turkey and

1 piece of sweet potato and she was like, " Is that all you're going to

eat? You need to eat more than that. " and I just couldn't get it through

her head that I couldn't eat more than that...She just does not

understand. I have said all along that people who aren't in the same

boat as you are just can't fathom what we go through on a daily basis.

How do we get through this?

T.

Lap RNY 6/20/03

432/305/170

Houston, Dr. Adam Naaman

Visit my homepage at http://users3.ev1.net/~leeds/>

http://users3.ev1.net/~leeds/

" I will find my way, I can go the distance. I'll be there someday if I

can be strong, I know every mile will be worth my while, I would go most

anywhere to fell like I belong. "

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I've been reading this thread with a great deal of interest because it's an

issue that affects both those who have had the surgery and those with whom they

come in contact.

Let me offer a bit of perspective from the " other " side of the table.

While I do agree that strangers and those who are just being nosy should mind

their own business if they don't know what's going on, or what you have been

through, I also think it's important that you should try to educate those you do

care about regarding your surgery and new dietary guidelines.

Sometimes when people coax you into eating more, it's their way of saying... " I

want to know more about what you're going through, and this is the only way I

know how to do it. " To you it may seem like they're being insensitive, but in

reality, they simply aren't aware of what you're going through. And they're too

afraid to come right out and ask.

I know that when my friend decided to have the surgery, I did everything

possible to educate myself on the before, during and after scenarios. But not

everyone in your family or close circle of friends has that same inclination.

In fact, most are fearful of knowing too much. But the more they know, the

easier it will be for them to support you.

Despite your best efforts there may still be those who tell you " you really

should eat more, " (moms especially are conditioned to do this) but at least

you'll have the peace of mind knowing it's their issue now, not yours.

Warmest Regards,

Barb

Re: who needs the scrutiny?

You know I think everyone should mind thier own business if they

dont know whats going on or what you have been thru.

I know this past weekend I had the same ordeal..I went out with my

mom and her friend to do a lil Christmas shopping and they wanted to

go eat Chinese..I told them I cant eat that..so they settled on

going to a Mexican resturant..So I order refried beans

w/cheese...and they looked ant me and asked " Is that all your going

to eat? " I said yes and you know that I cant eat alot...My mom made

the comment that I needed to started eating more...I just looked at

her and made a face...She doesnt understand that I cant eat like I

use too and that I have to follow Drs orders and what I use to eat

may make me sick now...I am back on liquids till I see the Dr

tuesday, and we will go from there,,,

But I mean golly what do people expect...and It irritates me to

death for someone to sit there and stare at you while you eat...and

YES, I get, " Can you eat that " or " Is that all you are going to

eat " ...ALL THE TIME!!! ugghhhh!

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oh no, i began this thread, after my bony dad-in-law was checking out my plate

of food. now that i think about it, he's amazed &

fascinated by the whole thing. he's witnessed my transformation. i love lanky

quite a bit actually.

lori h.

> I've been reading this thread with a great deal of interest because it's an

issue that affects both those who have had the surgery and

those with whom they come in contact.

>

> Let me offer a bit of perspective from the " other " side of the table.

>

> While I do agree that strangers and those who are just being nosy should mind

their own business if they don't know what's going

on, or what you have been through, I also think it's important that you should

try to educate those you do care about regarding your

surgery and new dietary guidelines.

>

> Sometimes when people coax you into eating more, it's their way of saying...

" I want to know more about what you're going through,

and this is the only way I know how to do it. " To you it may seem like they're

being insensitive, but in reality, they simply aren't aware

of what you're going through. And they're too afraid to come right out and ask.

>

> I know that when my friend decided to have the surgery, I did everything

possible to educate myself on the before, during and

after scenarios. But not everyone in your family or close circle of friends has

that same inclination. In fact, most are fearful of

knowing too much. But the more they know, the easier it will be for them to

support you.

>

> Despite your best efforts there may still be those who tell you " you really

should eat more, " (moms especially are conditioned to do

this) but at least you'll have the peace of mind knowing it's their issue now,

not yours.

>

> Warmest Regards,

> Barb

>

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