Confessions of an underbite

[Guest guest]

Hello, my name is . And... ummm... I have an underbite.

There, I said it. You folks might be the only other people in the

world that actually know. My whole life has revolved around keeping

this secret.

There is maybe a 1cm gap between my protruding lower jaw and the

upper teeth. But I have learned and trained my mouth to never close.

The natural resting position of my jaw is open, with the upper and

lower teeth almost touching. It looks like they are in line like they

should be. It actually takes effort to close my jaw completely. I can

pass for a normal person, in fact most people would consider me

attractive. If I smile, you only ever see my upper teeth.

It started in grade 7. I had braces and then a retainer to get nice

straight teeth. I remember talking about it to one of my friends, and

he said " it looks like you almost have an UNDERbite hahah! " Later

when I was about 16 and had a more severe underbite, my othodontist

referred me to a surgeon, and I went with my parents. He had a mould

of my upper and lower jaw sitting on his desk. It looked like it was

upside down. He explained the proceedure to my parents. I'm pretty

sure this was the first time they found out about it. " Oh, so that's

basically how his teeth are? " my dad asked. " That's exactly how they

are, " the surgeon replied. I remember going home, and my mom asking

me to bite down on a carrot to show her. " Well, you don't want major

SURGERY! " she said. We never spoke of it again. I'm convincing myself

that they somehow forgot about it over the years, and don't know that

their son is a freak.

I was very quiet in highschool. I kept my jaw slightly open but with

my lips closed to appear to have a normal profile, and nobody ever

knew I had an underbite. I *HATED* talking to people face to face.

People would say I have good eye contact, but that is only to check

if you are looking at my mouth. Eating is a nightmare, I never

properly chew my food because it would be very clear from my profile

that I have a huge underbite. I love chicken wings but can only eat

them alone. I eat pizza with a fork and knife.

Despite all this, I was popular in highschool. Nobody ever teased me

because they never knew. I had plenty of friends. They probably

thought I was just shy or something. The most common thing that

people say about me is that I don't talk much, but when I do it's the

funniest stuff they've heard. I like to pretend that I just choose my

words carefully, but inside I am screaming at myself to just talk to

people, but I couldn't, or they might find out my secret. I always

knew that if anyone found out, I would either kill them or more

likely just kill myself. I would have probably killed myself by now

due to the constant emotional torture, but then I was terrified that

after I was dead they would close my jaw and then everyone would know

the truth. Yes, I know I am a psycho. But I am also very intelligent,

I managed to graduate at the top of my class without putting any

effort into it at all...

I went to the dentist before I started University. I remember that

the technician cleaning my teeth asked me to close my mouth. I heard

her say " oh, that's weird. " I haven't been to the dentist again in

over 6 years.

I have been living with my girlfriend for about five years now, whom

I met in University. I am absolutely certain that she doesn't know I

have an underbite. I am thinking of ways I can finally get the

surgery done without telling her. My emotional trauma and fear of

people finding out my darkest secret goes that deep...

I read through some of the messages here today, and I cried. I cried

like a baby actually. You see, somehow I thought I was the only one

with this problem. Sure, some people have big noses or ears, but

nothing like this. It is extremely comforting to know that other

people have gone through the same thing, and to see the incredible

results.

I think my particular cause of the underbite is that I have a fairly

large tongue. In fact when it is at rest it can fit completely over

all my bottom teeth and even out the front. But that is probably

because I trained it to be between my upper and lower teeth so that I

wouldn't close my jaw when I was sleeping. I'm fairly certain that if

I get the surgery, my tongue won't physically fit in my mouth and

I'll choke to death, but at least I will die " normal. "

I'm 26 years old now, and I should be the poster child for the

extreme emotional trauma that can occur by not correcting a physical

defect as soon as possible. I advise everyone, especially parents of

children with problems, to correct any defects as soon as possible,

no matter what the cost or if further surgeries later are required!

Praying to God just to be normal is a horrible thing.

Thanks for reading my rantings, and I hope you can understand what I

put myself through for the past 10 years.