Cute Little Stories

[Guest guest]

> >>A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running as fast as she

> >>could,

> >>trying not to be late for Bible class. As she ran she prayed, " Dear

Lord,

> >>please don't let me be late! Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! "

> >>

> >>As she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting

> >>her

> >>clothes dirty and tearing her dress. She got up, brushed herself off,

and

> >>started running again.

> >>

> >>As she ran she once again began to pray, " Dear Lord, please don't let

me

> >>be

> >>late... But please don't shove me either! "

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on and

on.

> >>Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, " Mommy, if we

give

> >>him

> >>the money now, will he let us go? "

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>A little boy was overheard praying: " Lord, if You can't make me a

better

> >>boy,

> >>don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am! "

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about their fathers.

> >>The first boy says, " My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper,

he

> >>calls it a poem, they give him $50. "

> >>

> >>The second boy says, " That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a

> >>piece

> >>of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100. "

> >>

> >>The third boy says, " I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words

on

> >>a

> >>piece of paper, he calls it a sermon. And it takes eight people to

> >>collect

> >>all the money! "

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn't have to hear about all

the

> >>men

> >>she could have married, and she didn't have to hear about the way his

> >>mother

> >>cooked.

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she requested

no

> >>male

> >>pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions for her memorial service,

she

> >>wrote, " They wouldn't take me out while I was alive, I don't want them

to

> >>take me out when I'm dead.

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>A police recruit was asked during the exam, " What would you do if you

had

> >>to

> >>arrest your own mother? "

> >>He said, " Call for backup. "

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed

them

> >>to

> >>go to church, " And why is it necessary to be quiet in church? "

> >>Annie replied, " Because people are sleeping. "

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>A Sunday School teacher asked her class why ph and took Jesus

> >>with them to Jerusalem. A small child replied: " They couldn't get a

> >>baby-sitter. "

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her

five

> >>and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to " honor thy

father

> >>and thy mother, " she asked " Is there a commandment that teaches us how

to

> >>treat our brothers and sisters? " Without missing a beat one little boy

> >>answered, " Thou shall not kill. "

> >>

> >>* * * * *

> >>

> >>At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything,

including

> >>human beings. Little ny seemed especially intent when they told him

> >>how

> >>Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.

> >>Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were

ill,

> >>and said, ny what is the matter? "

> >>Little ny responded, " I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going

to

> >>have

> >>a wife. "