Re: Confessions of an underbite

January 23, 2004

Wow - malocclusions are very common and you are NOT a freak for

having an underbite. You've probably heard the saying about being

our own worst critics and it is absolutely true. I'm not saying

people wouldn't notice your underbite, but it sounds like you've let

the condition effect you very deeply.

As for the tongue thing, it sounds like you have a tongue thrust,

which is a real condition that, as far as I can define it, is when

the tongue pushes up against the teeth in order to make up for a

malocclusion. It actually makes matters worse because it pushes the

teeth out of position by exerting, however slight, repeated pressure

on the teeth. I'm still coping with getting my tongue thrust under

control, though I had an overbite and narrow upper before surgery.

I too am 26 and have an arthritic jaw joint that I'll be coping with

for the rest of my life. Having come through upper segmentation and

lower advancement, I can honestly tell you that it's not really that

bad to get through. Medical technology does some wonderful things.

If you can pursue orthognathic treatment at this time, I encourage

you to do so, despite what parents or other people close to you might

say about it. They're not the ones living 24/7 with you misaligned

jaws. Plus you run an increased risk of losing your teeth and

needing dentures at a young age if you don't take care of things.

Not going to the dentist doesn't exactly help that situation.

I wish you luck and hope you can find some self confidence that will

enable you to be yourself in your own life. You won't have a chance

to live your life over, so do what you can do live it right right now.

> Hello, my name is . And... ummm... I have an underbite.

>

> There, I said it. You folks might be the only other people in the

> world that actually know. My whole life has revolved around keeping

> this secret.

>

> There is maybe a 1cm gap between my protruding lower jaw and the

> upper teeth. But I have learned and trained my mouth to never

close.

> The natural resting position of my jaw is open, with the upper and

> lower teeth almost touching. It looks like they are in line like

they

> should be. It actually takes effort to close my jaw completely. I

can

> pass for a normal person, in fact most people would consider me

> attractive. If I smile, you only ever see my upper teeth.

>

> It started in grade 7. I had braces and then a retainer to get nice

> straight teeth. I remember talking about it to one of my friends,

and

> he said " it looks like you almost have an UNDERbite hahah! " Later

> when I was about 16 and had a more severe underbite, my othodontist

> referred me to a surgeon, and I went with my parents. He had a

mould

> of my upper and lower jaw sitting on his desk. It looked like it

was

> upside down. He explained the proceedure to my parents. I'm pretty

> sure this was the first time they found out about it. " Oh, so

that's

> basically how his teeth are? " my dad asked. " That's exactly how

they

> are, " the surgeon replied. I remember going home, and my mom asking

> me to bite down on a carrot to show her. " Well, you don't want

major

> SURGERY! " she said. We never spoke of it again. I'm convincing

myself

> that they somehow forgot about it over the years, and don't know

that

> their son is a freak.

>

> I was very quiet in highschool. I kept my jaw slightly open but

with

> my lips closed to appear to have a normal profile, and nobody ever

> knew I had an underbite. I *HATED* talking to people face to face.

> People would say I have good eye contact, but that is only to check

> if you are looking at my mouth. Eating is a nightmare, I never

> properly chew my food because it would be very clear from my

profile

> that I have a huge underbite. I love chicken wings but can only eat

> them alone. I eat pizza with a fork and knife.

>

> Despite all this, I was popular in highschool. Nobody ever teased

me

> because they never knew. I had plenty of friends. They probably

> thought I was just shy or something. The most common thing that

> people say about me is that I don't talk much, but when I do it's

the

> funniest stuff they've heard. I like to pretend that I just choose

my

> words carefully, but inside I am screaming at myself to just talk

to

> people, but I couldn't, or they might find out my secret. I always

> knew that if anyone found out, I would either kill them or more

> likely just kill myself. I would have probably killed myself by now

> due to the constant emotional torture, but then I was terrified

that

> after I was dead they would close my jaw and then everyone would

know

> the truth. Yes, I know I am a psycho. But I am also very

intelligent,

> I managed to graduate at the top of my class without putting any

> effort into it at all...

>

> I went to the dentist before I started University. I remember that

> the technician cleaning my teeth asked me to close my mouth. I

heard

> her say " oh, that's weird. " I haven't been to the dentist again in

> over 6 years.

>

> I have been living with my girlfriend for about five years now,

whom

> I met in University. I am absolutely certain that she doesn't know

I

> have an underbite. I am thinking of ways I can finally get the

> surgery done without telling her. My emotional trauma and fear of

> people finding out my darkest secret goes that deep...

>

> I read through some of the messages here today, and I cried. I

cried

> like a baby actually. You see, somehow I thought I was the only one

> with this problem. Sure, some people have big noses or ears, but

> nothing like this. It is extremely comforting to know that other

> people have gone through the same thing, and to see the incredible

> results.

>

> I think my particular cause of the underbite is that I have a

fairly

> large tongue. In fact when it is at rest it can fit completely over

> all my bottom teeth and even out the front. But that is probably

> because I trained it to be between my upper and lower teeth so that

I

> wouldn't close my jaw when I was sleeping. I'm fairly certain that

if

> I get the surgery, my tongue won't physically fit in my mouth and

> I'll choke to death, but at least I will die " normal. "

>

> I'm 26 years old now, and I should be the poster child for the

> extreme emotional trauma that can occur by not correcting a

physical

> defect as soon as possible. I advise everyone, especially parents

of

> children with problems, to correct any defects as soon as possible,

> no matter what the cost or if further surgeries later are required!

> Praying to God just to be normal is a horrible thing.

>

> Thanks for reading my rantings, and I hope you can understand what

I

> put myself through for the past 10 years.

>

January 23, 2004

Hi ,

Welcome to the group. Thank you for being so open to us, I know that

it was very hard to expose yourself like you did. Kind of like the

first step in the 12-step AA program. And now that you know that you

are not alone.....we all understand parts of what you have gone

through.

If you are going to pursue this surgery, I would suggest that you try

to open up to your girlfriend. You have been together for 5 years,

try talking to her. If you do this, having her support will make

things easier.

Come to the site and vent all you need to, we all have.

Good Luck,

a

> Hello, my name is . And... ummm... I have an underbite.

>

> There, I said it. You folks might be the only other people in the

> world that actually know. My whole life has revolved around keeping

> this secret.

>

January 23, 2004

Hi ,

Welcome to the group. Thank you for being so open to us, I know that

it was very hard to expose yourself like you did. Kind of like the

first step in the 12-step AA program. And now that you know that you

are not alone.....we all understand parts of what you have gone

through.

If you are going to pursue this surgery, I would suggest that you try

to open up to your girlfriend. You have been together for 5 years,

try talking to her. If you do this, having her support will make

things easier.

Come to the site and vent all you need to, we all have.

Good Luck,

a

> Hello, my name is . And... ummm... I have an underbite.

>

> There, I said it. You folks might be the only other people in the

> world that actually know. My whole life has revolved around keeping

> this secret.

>

January 23, 2004

,

No, your not a freak....and believe it or not, not the only one who

kept their mouth slightly open to compensate. I did the same

thing! I also used to joke that I thought my tongue was too

big...or wide. There were times that the sides would be pressed so

hard against the teeth that I would have indentations! I also felt

my underbite was not that severe but was obviously self conscience

about it (I also had a very prominent canine tooth that stuck out as

result of all this). I didn't have any biting/eating/breathing

problems as some have, but sometimes at the end of the day my lower

jaw would be tired and when I slept I would " rest " it on my fist

(could be as I was always keeping mouth open).

If you do decide to correct this, be aware that people are not going

to understand why you are doing all this, and some may even try to

discourage you as they may seem it to be so extreme. They mean well

but they just don't understand. I didn't have my surgery done until

I was 36yrs old.....married, three kids, good life, etc.....My mom

just could not understand why I wanted to do it, but she wasn't the

one that would get flashes of anxiety when I thought of my

teeth/jaws. Yes, I hate to say it, but I did not one my kids to be

embarassed of me when they got older (absolutely stupid thought, but

there it is!) It was a personal decision I made, but once made I

quietly stuck to it

, just know you are so not alone and if your girlfriend truly

loves you she will be with you (my husband was such a support).

This group is so great and we'll all be there with you also!

Carol

> > Hello, my name is . And... ummm... I have an underbite.

> >

> > There, I said it. You folks might be the only other people in

the

> > world that actually know. My whole life has revolved around

keeping

> > this secret.

>

> >

January 23, 2004

,

No, your not a freak....and believe it or not, not the only one who

kept their mouth slightly open to compensate. I did the same

thing! I also used to joke that I thought my tongue was too

big...or wide. There were times that the sides would be pressed so

hard against the teeth that I would have indentations! I also felt

my underbite was not that severe but was obviously self conscience

about it (I also had a very prominent canine tooth that stuck out as

result of all this). I didn't have any biting/eating/breathing

problems as some have, but sometimes at the end of the day my lower

jaw would be tired and when I slept I would " rest " it on my fist

(could be as I was always keeping mouth open).

If you do decide to correct this, be aware that people are not going

to understand why you are doing all this, and some may even try to

discourage you as they may seem it to be so extreme. They mean well

but they just don't understand. I didn't have my surgery done until

I was 36yrs old.....married, three kids, good life, etc.....My mom

just could not understand why I wanted to do it, but she wasn't the

one that would get flashes of anxiety when I thought of my

teeth/jaws. Yes, I hate to say it, but I did not one my kids to be

embarassed of me when they got older (absolutely stupid thought, but

there it is!) It was a personal decision I made, but once made I

quietly stuck to it

, just know you are so not alone and if your girlfriend truly

loves you she will be with you (my husband was such a support).

This group is so great and we'll all be there with you also!

Carol

> > Hello, my name is . And... ummm... I have an underbite.

> >

> > There, I said it. You folks might be the only other people in

the

> > world that actually know. My whole life has revolved around

keeping

> > this secret.

>

> >

January 23, 2004

,

No, your not a freak....and believe it or not, not the only one who

kept their mouth slightly open to compensate. I did the same

thing! I also used to joke that I thought my tongue was too

big...or wide. There were times that the sides would be pressed so

hard against the teeth that I would have indentations! I also felt

my underbite was not that severe but was obviously self conscience

about it (I also had a very prominent canine tooth that stuck out as

result of all this). I didn't have any biting/eating/breathing

problems as some have, but sometimes at the end of the day my lower

jaw would be tired and when I slept I would " rest " it on my fist

(could be as I was always keeping mouth open).

If you do decide to correct this, be aware that people are not going

to understand why you are doing all this, and some may even try to

discourage you as they may seem it to be so extreme. They mean well

but they just don't understand. I didn't have my surgery done until

I was 36yrs old.....married, three kids, good life, etc.....My mom

just could not understand why I wanted to do it, but she wasn't the

one that would get flashes of anxiety when I thought of my

teeth/jaws. Yes, I hate to say it, but I did not one my kids to be

embarassed of me when they got older (absolutely stupid thought, but

there it is!) It was a personal decision I made, but once made I

quietly stuck to it

, just know you are so not alone and if your girlfriend truly

loves you she will be with you (my husband was such a support).

This group is so great and we'll all be there with you also!

Carol

> > Hello, my name is . And... ummm... I have an underbite.

> >

> > There, I said it. You folks might be the only other people in

the

> > world that actually know. My whole life has revolved around

keeping

> > this secret.

>

> >

January 23, 2004

thats horrible you feel like that. i had an underbite, and a cross-

bite. it was due to a tumor i had in my ear when i was 7. it slowed

the top jaws growth, and pushed my bottom jaw to the side. nothing in

my mouth was correct. i had braces when i was in 1st grade.. well on

my two front teeth.. so about 3rd grade i had full on braces, then i

got them off right before 7th grade ended. i had talked a little of

surgery but i was too scared, so i tried to forget it and tell myself

that it was 5 years away. right before freshman year started, i got

my braces back on to prep me for surgery. it took from my freshman

year- 1999 to 03 (jan 14th) for me to get my surgery (due to growth

and working with the surgeon to get proper allignment). the last year

in braces really made my lower stick out - i hated it more than

anything. it made me look worse than jay leno. i have pictures of

before, and after, and some from a week post op if you want to see

the differences.. if you click on files (over on the left here).. my

folder thing is named amandas surgery pictures. see thats another

thing. the surgery would change your appearance at least a little

bit, and the many appointments in preperation would all be too hard

to hide from your girlfriend. not that i think hiding stuff is okay.

but its a long process, and if you tried to hide it, surely shed find

out, and wonder why you couldnt tell her. besides, people probably do

notice (im not trying to be rude here) but if they think no one else

has noticed, theyre not going to be cruel about it to you (im talking

like in HS) and not only is the preping a long process, but the

healing. my surgery was in januaury of last year.. lets see.. i

stayed home from jan 14th(surg date) to feb 10th. i was an " extreme "

case.. i have read on here people have been back to work in 5 days.

but no way could i have done that. but then again work and school are

different places.. i wouldnt be embarassed to drool at work, but ohh

hell yea at school.. so anyways when i finally came back to school, i

still looked like shit. i had a puffy face until the time of sr.

ball.. May. and even in May it was still a little more than now. but

then again, bodies are all different. youre probably wondering why i

am writing all this random stuff.. so am i. but since youre not used

to hearing about the surgery and all of that, i suppose you would

like to hear as much information as you can get. the surgery for me

was a real plus, people tell me i look so much happier (the shape of

my smile, and face).. another thing, your dental assistant should not

have said " oh weird " that is wayy wrong. i hated eating in front of

people too. i always tore things off and put them in my mouth because

NO way coul i bite straight on. i know if i actually went back to

school now, and looked the way i do, acted the way i do since i got

out of that hell hole.. i know i would get treated so differently -

which is horrible!!! anyways, i can relate to you, sorry if none of

this makes sense to you, i am a random girl with random things to

say - or i have proven it in this post right?! well, i am glad you

found this group. i havent been here for long, but i know i find jaw

surgery very interesting and i thought maybe i could answer a few

questions that i related to on here. so i hope everyone has made you

feel better and at home. you really should look at my pictures where

i told you,.. the difference is amazing. anyways, if you need someone

to talk to.. you can email me. twistedicp@...

amanda

> Hello, my name is . And... ummm... I have an underbite.

>

> There, I said it. You folks might be the only other people in the

> world that actually know. My whole life has revolved around keeping

> this secret.

>

> There is maybe a 1cm gap between my protruding lower jaw and the

> upper teeth. But I have learned and trained my mouth to never

close.

> The natural resting position of my jaw is open, with the upper and

> lower teeth almost touching. It looks like they are in line like

they

> should be. It actually takes effort to close my jaw completely. I

can

> pass for a normal person, in fact most people would consider me

> attractive. If I smile, you only ever see my upper teeth.

>

> It started in grade 7. I had braces and then a retainer to get nice

> straight teeth. I remember talking about it to one of my friends,

and

> he said " it looks like you almost have an UNDERbite hahah! " Later

> when I was about 16 and had a more severe underbite, my othodontist

> referred me to a surgeon, and I went with my parents. He had a

mould

> of my upper and lower jaw sitting on his desk. It looked like it

was

> upside down. He explained the proceedure to my parents. I'm pretty

> sure this was the first time they found out about it. " Oh, so

that's

> basically how his teeth are? " my dad asked. " That's exactly how

they

> are, " the surgeon replied. I remember going home, and my mom asking

> me to bite down on a carrot to show her. " Well, you don't want

major

> SURGERY! " she said. We never spoke of it again. I'm convincing

myself

> that they somehow forgot about it over the years, and don't know

that

> their son is a freak.

>

> I was very quiet in highschool. I kept my jaw slightly open but

with

> my lips closed to appear to have a normal profile, and nobody ever

> knew I had an underbite. I *HATED* talking to people face to face.

> People would say I have good eye contact, but that is only to check

> if you are looking at my mouth. Eating is a nightmare, I never

> properly chew my food because it would be very clear from my

profile

> that I have a huge underbite. I love chicken wings but can only eat

> them alone. I eat pizza with a fork and knife.

>

> Despite all this, I was popular in highschool. Nobody ever teased

me

> because they never knew. I had plenty of friends. They probably

> thought I was just shy or something. The most common thing that

> people say about me is that I don't talk much, but when I do it's

the

> funniest stuff they've heard. I like to pretend that I just choose

my

> words carefully, but inside I am screaming at myself to just talk

to

> people, but I couldn't, or they might find out my secret. I always

> knew that if anyone found out, I would either kill them or more

> likely just kill myself. I would have probably killed myself by now

> due to the constant emotional torture, but then I was terrified

that

> after I was dead they would close my jaw and then everyone would

know

> the truth. Yes, I know I am a psycho. But I am also very

intelligent,

> I managed to graduate at the top of my class without putting any

> effort into it at all...

>

> I went to the dentist before I started University. I remember that

> the technician cleaning my teeth asked me to close my mouth. I

heard

> her say " oh, that's weird. " I haven't been to the dentist again in

> over 6 years.

>

> I have been living with my girlfriend for about five years now,

whom

> I met in University. I am absolutely certain that she doesn't know

I

> have an underbite. I am thinking of ways I can finally get the

> surgery done without telling her. My emotional trauma and fear of

> people finding out my darkest secret goes that deep...

>

> I read through some of the messages here today, and I cried. I

cried

> like a baby actually. You see, somehow I thought I was the only one

> with this problem. Sure, some people have big noses or ears, but

> nothing like this. It is extremely comforting to know that other

> people have gone through the same thing, and to see the incredible

> results.

>

> I think my particular cause of the underbite is that I have a

fairly

> large tongue. In fact when it is at rest it can fit completely over

> all my bottom teeth and even out the front. But that is probably

> because I trained it to be between my upper and lower teeth so that

I

> wouldn't close my jaw when I was sleeping. I'm fairly certain that

if

> I get the surgery, my tongue won't physically fit in my mouth and

> I'll choke to death, but at least I will die " normal. "

>

> I'm 26 years old now, and I should be the poster child for the

> extreme emotional trauma that can occur by not correcting a

physical

> defect as soon as possible. I advise everyone, especially parents

of

> children with problems, to correct any defects as soon as possible,

> no matter what the cost or if further surgeries later are required!

> Praying to God just to be normal is a horrible thing.

>

> Thanks for reading my rantings, and I hope you can understand what

I

> put myself through for the past 10 years.

>

January 23, 2004