Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 Loriann, Thank You. At least right now he is healthy and has the virus but it's not into full blown aids.He is clear out in California and my arms ache to hold and comfort him. Hopefully he will come home soon but wants to stay out there for awhile yet. Bless his heart he's thinking about me and my surgery and is sending me e-mails full of support and love. Thanks again for your kind thoughts. It's nice the way your burden is lightened just by a few kind words from someone who cares. Sincerely, Angel --- Lori List llist@...> wrote: > Oh Angel, I am so sorry. I will be thinking of your > son and your family, > and hoping for the best. > Much love, > Loriann > > Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 Loriann, Thank You. At least right now he is healthy and has the virus but it's not into full blown aids.He is clear out in California and my arms ache to hold and comfort him. Hopefully he will come home soon but wants to stay out there for awhile yet. Bless his heart he's thinking about me and my surgery and is sending me e-mails full of support and love. Thanks again for your kind thoughts. It's nice the way your burden is lightened just by a few kind words from someone who cares. Sincerely, Angel --- Lori List llist@...> wrote: > Oh Angel, I am so sorry. I will be thinking of your > son and your family, > and hoping for the best. > Much love, > Loriann > > Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 Loriann, Thank You. At least right now he is healthy and has the virus but it's not into full blown aids.He is clear out in California and my arms ache to hold and comfort him. Hopefully he will come home soon but wants to stay out there for awhile yet. Bless his heart he's thinking about me and my surgery and is sending me e-mails full of support and love. Thanks again for your kind thoughts. It's nice the way your burden is lightened just by a few kind words from someone who cares. Sincerely, Angel --- Lori List llist@...> wrote: > Oh Angel, I am so sorry. I will be thinking of your > son and your family, > and hoping for the best. > Much love, > Loriann > > Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 Angel, I will keep your family and your son in my prayers. *hugs* Anita pre-pre-op in Denver > Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 Angel, I will keep your family and your son in my prayers. *hugs* Anita pre-pre-op in Denver > Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 Angel, I will keep your family and your son in my prayers. *hugs* Anita pre-pre-op in Denver > Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 You don't know how great it makes me feel to think I have lessened your burden, even a little bit. What a remarkable child to be thinking of you right now and still supporting you so much even in the face of his own challenges. I know that arm ache you are referring to, we Mommies know. Love, Loriann Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 You don't know how great it makes me feel to think I have lessened your burden, even a little bit. What a remarkable child to be thinking of you right now and still supporting you so much even in the face of his own challenges. I know that arm ache you are referring to, we Mommies know. Love, Loriann Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 23, 2001 Report Share Posted April 23, 2001 You don't know how great it makes me feel to think I have lessened your burden, even a little bit. What a remarkable child to be thinking of you right now and still supporting you so much even in the face of his own challenges. I know that arm ache you are referring to, we Mommies know. Love, Loriann Re: Re: Our friend Glo > > > , > Thank you so much for the update on Glo. I never got > to meet her but did read some of her posts. My heart > was heavy when I heard about the cancer. My thoughts > have often drifted to her and can understand the > feelings of her family as we just found out Saturday > that my 19 year old son is HIV postive. > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 24, 2001 Report Share Posted April 24, 2001 Angel, May God be with you and your family. I'm praying for you and your son. Would it help if I swung some chickens for him, too? Hugs, Pam Pre-op in MD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 24, 2001 Report Share Posted April 24, 2001 Dear Pam, Chickens are the favored animal to swing they spin at a faster rate than any other animal, so thank you and I appreciate the hug and wishes. Angel --- pamjams2@... wrote: > Angel, > > May God be with you and your family. I'm praying > for you and your son. > Would it help if I swung some chickens for him, too? > > > Hugs, > > Pam > Pre-op in MD > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 Jodie, I only hope that I can be like you and have a nice smooth surgery. And I hope I get the chance to help someone else the way you helped me. I had never been a member of an internet group, before I came to this one. Your warm greeting and invitation to join the DS Ohio group in Bowling Green for a get together was very important to me. It gave me the courage to talk to people who had the surgery and do some first hand research. That visit made me feel like I wasn't alone in my desire to get rid of this debilitating weight. Then when I got there, wow! Everyone was great. Early on I bounced around researching other procedures but there was such a " upbeat " attitude among DS'ers that I was always drawn back to it. The quality of life after surgery was important to me and I got proof that the quality of life after DS was great! The risks are worth the taking. Thanks again. Sorry so mushy, it just " mushed " out of me before I could think about it.lol Angel --- Jodie and jjjwats@...> wrote: > Congradulations Angel! I have a very good friend > getting his done in October also. It will be a good > month, I'm sure of it! Jodie W. > Age 28 > BMI 49.9 > Dr. Hess > March 28, 01/325 lbs > Paid By Coresource and Aetna > 04-06-01 Down 20 pounds! > 04-20-01 288, Down 37 lbs! > 05-14-01 276 lbs, down 49 lbs!!! > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system > (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.237 / Virus Database: 115 - Release > Date: 3/7/01 > ===== Angel Connor DS Pre-Op Dr Maguire Surgery date (pending approval) Oct 29th BMI 64 __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 Jodie, I only hope that I can be like you and have a nice smooth surgery. And I hope I get the chance to help someone else the way you helped me. I had never been a member of an internet group, before I came to this one. Your warm greeting and invitation to join the DS Ohio group in Bowling Green for a get together was very important to me. It gave me the courage to talk to people who had the surgery and do some first hand research. That visit made me feel like I wasn't alone in my desire to get rid of this debilitating weight. Then when I got there, wow! Everyone was great. Early on I bounced around researching other procedures but there was such a " upbeat " attitude among DS'ers that I was always drawn back to it. The quality of life after surgery was important to me and I got proof that the quality of life after DS was great! The risks are worth the taking. Thanks again. Sorry so mushy, it just " mushed " out of me before I could think about it.lol Angel --- Jodie and jjjwats@...> wrote: > Congradulations Angel! I have a very good friend > getting his done in October also. It will be a good > month, I'm sure of it! Jodie W. > Age 28 > BMI 49.9 > Dr. Hess > March 28, 01/325 lbs > Paid By Coresource and Aetna > 04-06-01 Down 20 pounds! > 04-20-01 288, Down 37 lbs! > 05-14-01 276 lbs, down 49 lbs!!! > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system > (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.237 / Virus Database: 115 - Release > Date: 3/7/01 > ===== Angel Connor DS Pre-Op Dr Maguire Surgery date (pending approval) Oct 29th BMI 64 __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 Jodie, I only hope that I can be like you and have a nice smooth surgery. And I hope I get the chance to help someone else the way you helped me. I had never been a member of an internet group, before I came to this one. Your warm greeting and invitation to join the DS Ohio group in Bowling Green for a get together was very important to me. It gave me the courage to talk to people who had the surgery and do some first hand research. That visit made me feel like I wasn't alone in my desire to get rid of this debilitating weight. Then when I got there, wow! Everyone was great. Early on I bounced around researching other procedures but there was such a " upbeat " attitude among DS'ers that I was always drawn back to it. The quality of life after surgery was important to me and I got proof that the quality of life after DS was great! The risks are worth the taking. Thanks again. Sorry so mushy, it just " mushed " out of me before I could think about it.lol Angel --- Jodie and jjjwats@...> wrote: > Congradulations Angel! I have a very good friend > getting his done in October also. It will be a good > month, I'm sure of it! Jodie W. > Age 28 > BMI 49.9 > Dr. Hess > March 28, 01/325 lbs > Paid By Coresource and Aetna > 04-06-01 Down 20 pounds! > 04-20-01 288, Down 37 lbs! > 05-14-01 276 lbs, down 49 lbs!!! > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system > (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.237 / Virus Database: 115 - Release > Date: 3/7/01 > ===== Angel Connor DS Pre-Op Dr Maguire Surgery date (pending approval) Oct 29th BMI 64 __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 I went to a support group meeting this evening in NY and had the most miserable time! I'm so bummed I could weep. I've decided to have this surgery and I brought my skeptical mom with me to a post-op support group meeting thinking we'd meet some people who had the surgery and find out how it landed for them and maybe get some support for beginning the process; and it had the nastiest people in there I could ever imagine having in one group! It was huge, but really run by a cadre of 5 or 6 people who were loud, rude and unkind to the pre-ops there. One guy was actually shouting because his agenda wasn't addressed, that of the possibility of splitting the group into 2, since there were too many people to fit around the already enormous conference table. He didn't like that idea, so whenever anyone asked a question, he would start shouting about splitting up the group and what a bad idea it was. It made me think: I sure hope this isn't required, cause I'm absolutely never coming back to THIS meeting with THESE people. I can't imagine actually getting support there. It's not a safe space to speak your feelings there, cause the people are mean if you disagree with them. I was all psyched for going to this particular hospital for the surgery, since the surgeons are supposed to be the best in the world at lap ds, but golly, where do I go for support? Maybe it's not just the doctor you have to think about, but all the other stuff as well. The program psychiatrist had come to that meeting as well, and he didn't seem like someone I'd want to have any conversations with at all. Now I'm wondering what to do, if maybe having these surgeons isn't worth the other stuff. I did meet a great woman outside though, she saw my mom and me walking to the car and approached us. She was pre-op and felt the same way. They have a rule that pre-ops aren't allowed to speak in these meetings, and when one of them said something that wasn't in line with the cadre's way of thinking, they shouted him down and told him he wasn't allowed to speak. It was all in all pretty rough. I'm at least glad the list is here. *sigh* Maybe these surgeons but another hospital's support group? Re: Angel > Jodie, I only hope that I can be like you and have a > nice smooth surgery. And I hope I get the chance to > help someone else the way you helped me. I had never > been a member of an internet group, before I came to > this one. Your warm greeting and invitation to join > the DS Ohio group in Bowling Green for a get together > was very important to me. It gave me the courage to > talk to people who had the surgery and do some first > hand research. That visit made me feel like I wasn't > alone in my desire to get rid of this debilitating > weight. Then when I got there, wow! Everyone was > great. Early on I bounced around researching other > procedures but there was such a " upbeat " attitude > among DS'ers that I was always drawn back to it. The > quality of life after surgery was important to me and > I got proof that the quality of life after DS was > great! The risks are worth the taking. Thanks again. > Sorry so mushy, it just " mushed " out of me before I > could think about it.lol Angel > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 I went to a support group meeting this evening in NY and had the most miserable time! I'm so bummed I could weep. I've decided to have this surgery and I brought my skeptical mom with me to a post-op support group meeting thinking we'd meet some people who had the surgery and find out how it landed for them and maybe get some support for beginning the process; and it had the nastiest people in there I could ever imagine having in one group! It was huge, but really run by a cadre of 5 or 6 people who were loud, rude and unkind to the pre-ops there. One guy was actually shouting because his agenda wasn't addressed, that of the possibility of splitting the group into 2, since there were too many people to fit around the already enormous conference table. He didn't like that idea, so whenever anyone asked a question, he would start shouting about splitting up the group and what a bad idea it was. It made me think: I sure hope this isn't required, cause I'm absolutely never coming back to THIS meeting with THESE people. I can't imagine actually getting support there. It's not a safe space to speak your feelings there, cause the people are mean if you disagree with them. I was all psyched for going to this particular hospital for the surgery, since the surgeons are supposed to be the best in the world at lap ds, but golly, where do I go for support? Maybe it's not just the doctor you have to think about, but all the other stuff as well. The program psychiatrist had come to that meeting as well, and he didn't seem like someone I'd want to have any conversations with at all. Now I'm wondering what to do, if maybe having these surgeons isn't worth the other stuff. I did meet a great woman outside though, she saw my mom and me walking to the car and approached us. She was pre-op and felt the same way. They have a rule that pre-ops aren't allowed to speak in these meetings, and when one of them said something that wasn't in line with the cadre's way of thinking, they shouted him down and told him he wasn't allowed to speak. It was all in all pretty rough. I'm at least glad the list is here. *sigh* Maybe these surgeons but another hospital's support group? Re: Angel > Jodie, I only hope that I can be like you and have a > nice smooth surgery. And I hope I get the chance to > help someone else the way you helped me. I had never > been a member of an internet group, before I came to > this one. Your warm greeting and invitation to join > the DS Ohio group in Bowling Green for a get together > was very important to me. It gave me the courage to > talk to people who had the surgery and do some first > hand research. That visit made me feel like I wasn't > alone in my desire to get rid of this debilitating > weight. Then when I got there, wow! Everyone was > great. Early on I bounced around researching other > procedures but there was such a " upbeat " attitude > among DS'ers that I was always drawn back to it. The > quality of life after surgery was important to me and > I got proof that the quality of life after DS was > great! The risks are worth the taking. Thanks again. > Sorry so mushy, it just " mushed " out of me before I > could think about it.lol Angel > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 At 10:37 PM -0400 5/16/01, Lynette Settles wrote: >I went to a support group meeting this evening in NY and had the most >miserable time! I'm so bummed I could weep.... I'm absolutely never >coming back to THIS meeting with THESE people. Ican't imagine >actually getting support there. It's not a safe space to speak >your feelings there, cause the people are mean if you disagree with them. Sorry for your lousy experience, Lynette. New Yawk can be a tough, uncaring place. I hope that this will not break your resolve to get the surgery. There are other physicians in other, more friendly places. --Steve (in Virginia) -- ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Steve Goldstein, age 61 Lap BPD/DS on May 2, 2001 Dr. Elariny, INOVA Fairfax Hospital, Virginia Starting (05/02/01) BMI = 51 BMI on 05/16 = 47 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 I'm sorry you had such a horrible experience, especially with your mother there. While none of my experiences have been that bad, I usually have not had luck with " support groups " as a whole, except for online. The ones I've been to - over many years for different things, more often than not had a few people who monopolized all the time and most people didn't get to say much at all. I have opted out of " support groups " in their traditional format and get all my support online. I really have no compaints about getting support online. You don't have to worry about people monopolizing the group, you can filter out any rudeness and I have yet to ask a question that didn't get answered. -Sherry (Lake Marcel, WA) BPD/DS Feb. 2, 2001 self-pay 5'5 " / 338 pounds / 33 years old Lost 9 pounds in pre-op weight loss efforts Have lost 73 pounds since surgery! Total of 82 pounds gone forEVER! http://www.fluffynet.com/wls/ > I went to a support group meeting this evening in NY and had the most > miserable time! I'm so bummed I could weep. I've decided to have this > surgery and I brought my skeptical mom with me to a post-op support group > meeting thinking we'd meet some people who had the surgery and find out how > it landed for them and maybe get some support for beginning the process; and > it had the nastiest people in there I could ever imagine having in one > group! It was huge, but really run by a cadre of 5 or 6 people who were > loud, rude and unkind to the pre-ops there. One guy was actually shouting > because his agenda wasn't addressed, that of the possibility of splitting > the group into 2, since there were too many people to fit around the already > enormous conference table. He didn't like that idea, so whenever anyone > asked a question, he would start shouting about splitting up the group and > what a bad idea it was. It made me think: I sure hope this isn't required, > cause I'm absolutely never coming back to THIS meeting with THESE people. I > can't imagine actually getting support there. It's not a safe space to speak > your feelings there, cause the people are mean if you disagree with them. I > was all psyched for going to this particular hospital for the surgery, since > the surgeons are supposed to be the best in the world at lap ds, but golly, > where do I go for support? Maybe it's not just the doctor you have to think > about, but all the other stuff as well. The program psychiatrist had come to > that meeting as well, and he didn't seem like someone I'd want to have any > conversations with at all. Now I'm wondering what to do, if maybe having > these surgeons isn't worth the other stuff. I did meet a great woman outside > though, she saw my mom and me walking to the car and approached us. She was > pre-op and felt the same way. They have a rule that pre-ops aren't allowed > to speak in these meetings, and when one of them said something that wasn't > in line with the cadre's way of thinking, they shouted him down and told him > he wasn't allowed to speak. It was all in all pretty rough. I'm at least > glad the list is here. *sigh* Maybe these surgeons but another hospital's > support group? > Re: Angel > > > > Jodie, I only hope that I can be like you and have a > > nice smooth surgery. And I hope I get the chance to > > help someone else the way you helped me. I had never > > been a member of an internet group, before I came to > > this one. Your warm greeting and invitation to join > > the DS Ohio group in Bowling Green for a get together > > was very important to me. It gave me the courage to > > talk to people who had the surgery and do some first > > hand research. That visit made me feel like I wasn't > > alone in my desire to get rid of this debilitating > > weight. Then when I got there, wow! Everyone was > > great. Early on I bounced around researching other > > procedures but there was such a " upbeat " attitude > > among DS'ers that I was always drawn back to it. The > > quality of life after surgery was important to me and > > I got proof that the quality of life after DS was > > great! The risks are worth the taking. Thanks again. > > Sorry so mushy, it just " mushed " out of me before I > > could think about it.lol Angel > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 Dear Lynette, I'm so sorry you had a bad experience. It really suprises me! My experience has been so totally opposite from yours! I'm not familiar with the NY group but I'm sure there is some one on this list that can guide you (anyone who can help out there?) I hope this was just a bad night for the group and not the norm. If you are feeling too uncomfortable about going back, maybe you can find another group. Where exactly are you from? Post us and someone on this list is bound to be able to tell you who to talk to. Investigate your options, then, when you've found a group and Dr. you're comfortable with, take your mom back and let her meet them. Or you could even let her read some of your favorite posts that explain the procedure or give advice on pre and post op issues. In short order she will be able to see that you will have quite a large support group! My mom is so impressed with the way people on this list pull for each other. She's never seen anything like it! With all the info that is out there her mind is much more at ease with the idea of this surgery. Good luck on your search. Stay here with us and I know you'll find what you seek. All the good souls on this list won't let you down. Your supportive friend, Angel --- Lynette Settles lgsettles@...> wrote: > I went to a support group meeting this evening in NY > and had the most > miserable time! I'm so bummed I could weep. I've > decided to have this > surgery and I brought my skeptical mom with me to a > post-op support group > meeting thinking we'd meet some people who had the > surgery and find out how > it landed for them and maybe get some support for > beginning the process; and > it had the nastiest people in there I could ever > imagine having in one > group! It was huge, but really run by a cadre of 5 > or 6 people who were > loud, rude and unkind to the pre-ops there. One guy > was actually shouting > because his agenda wasn't addressed, that of the > possibility of splitting > the group into 2, since there were too many people > to fit around the already > enormous conference table. He didn't like that idea, > so whenever anyone > asked a question, he would start shouting about > splitting up the group and > what a bad idea it was. It made me think: I sure > hope this isn't required, > cause I'm absolutely never coming back to THIS > meeting with THESE people. I > can't imagine actually getting support there. It's > not a safe space to speak > your feelings there, cause the people are mean if > you disagree with them. I > was all psyched for going to this particular > hospital for the surgery, since > the surgeons are supposed to be the best in the > world at lap ds, but golly, > where do I go for support? Maybe it's not just the > doctor you have to think > about, but all the other stuff as well. The program > psychiatrist had come to > that meeting as well, and he didn't seem like > someone I'd want to have any > conversations with at all. Now I'm wondering what to > do, if maybe having > these surgeons isn't worth the other stuff. I did > meet a great woman outside > though, she saw my mom and me walking to the car and > approached us. She was > pre-op and felt the same way. They have a rule that > pre-ops aren't allowed > to speak in these meetings, and when one of them > said something that wasn't > in line with the cadre's way of thinking, they > shouted him down and told him > he wasn't allowed to speak. It was all in all pretty > rough. I'm at least > glad the list is here. *sigh* Maybe these surgeons > but another hospital's > support group? > Re: Angel > > > > Jodie, I only hope that I can be like you and have > a > > nice smooth surgery. And I hope I get the chance > to > > help someone else the way you helped me. I had > never > > been a member of an internet group, before I came > to > > this one. Your warm greeting and invitation to > join > > the DS Ohio group in Bowling Green for a get > together > > was very important to me. It gave me the courage > to > > talk to people who had the surgery and do some > first > > hand research. That visit made me feel like I > wasn't > > alone in my desire to get rid of this debilitating > > weight. Then when I got there, wow! Everyone was > > great. Early on I bounced around researching other > > procedures but there was such a " upbeat " attitude > > among DS'ers that I was always drawn back to it. > The > > quality of life after surgery was important to me > and > > I got proof that the quality of life after DS was > > great! The risks are worth the taking. Thanks > again. > > Sorry so mushy, it just " mushed " out of me before > I > > could think about it.lol Angel > > > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 Dear Lynette, I'm so sorry you had a bad experience. It really suprises me! My experience has been so totally opposite from yours! I'm not familiar with the NY group but I'm sure there is some one on this list that can guide you (anyone who can help out there?) I hope this was just a bad night for the group and not the norm. If you are feeling too uncomfortable about going back, maybe you can find another group. Where exactly are you from? Post us and someone on this list is bound to be able to tell you who to talk to. Investigate your options, then, when you've found a group and Dr. you're comfortable with, take your mom back and let her meet them. Or you could even let her read some of your favorite posts that explain the procedure or give advice on pre and post op issues. In short order she will be able to see that you will have quite a large support group! My mom is so impressed with the way people on this list pull for each other. She's never seen anything like it! With all the info that is out there her mind is much more at ease with the idea of this surgery. Good luck on your search. Stay here with us and I know you'll find what you seek. All the good souls on this list won't let you down. Your supportive friend, Angel --- Lynette Settles lgsettles@...> wrote: > I went to a support group meeting this evening in NY > and had the most > miserable time! I'm so bummed I could weep. I've > decided to have this > surgery and I brought my skeptical mom with me to a > post-op support group > meeting thinking we'd meet some people who had the > surgery and find out how > it landed for them and maybe get some support for > beginning the process; and > it had the nastiest people in there I could ever > imagine having in one > group! It was huge, but really run by a cadre of 5 > or 6 people who were > loud, rude and unkind to the pre-ops there. One guy > was actually shouting > because his agenda wasn't addressed, that of the > possibility of splitting > the group into 2, since there were too many people > to fit around the already > enormous conference table. He didn't like that idea, > so whenever anyone > asked a question, he would start shouting about > splitting up the group and > what a bad idea it was. It made me think: I sure > hope this isn't required, > cause I'm absolutely never coming back to THIS > meeting with THESE people. I > can't imagine actually getting support there. It's > not a safe space to speak > your feelings there, cause the people are mean if > you disagree with them. I > was all psyched for going to this particular > hospital for the surgery, since > the surgeons are supposed to be the best in the > world at lap ds, but golly, > where do I go for support? Maybe it's not just the > doctor you have to think > about, but all the other stuff as well. The program > psychiatrist had come to > that meeting as well, and he didn't seem like > someone I'd want to have any > conversations with at all. Now I'm wondering what to > do, if maybe having > these surgeons isn't worth the other stuff. I did > meet a great woman outside > though, she saw my mom and me walking to the car and > approached us. She was > pre-op and felt the same way. They have a rule that > pre-ops aren't allowed > to speak in these meetings, and when one of them > said something that wasn't > in line with the cadre's way of thinking, they > shouted him down and told him > he wasn't allowed to speak. It was all in all pretty > rough. I'm at least > glad the list is here. *sigh* Maybe these surgeons > but another hospital's > support group? > Re: Angel > > > > Jodie, I only hope that I can be like you and have > a > > nice smooth surgery. And I hope I get the chance > to > > help someone else the way you helped me. I had > never > > been a member of an internet group, before I came > to > > this one. Your warm greeting and invitation to > join > > the DS Ohio group in Bowling Green for a get > together > > was very important to me. It gave me the courage > to > > talk to people who had the surgery and do some > first > > hand research. That visit made me feel like I > wasn't > > alone in my desire to get rid of this debilitating > > weight. Then when I got there, wow! Everyone was > > great. Early on I bounced around researching other > > procedures but there was such a " upbeat " attitude > > among DS'ers that I was always drawn back to it. > The > > quality of life after surgery was important to me > and > > I got proof that the quality of life after DS was > > great! The risks are worth the taking. Thanks > again. > > Sorry so mushy, it just " mushed " out of me before > I > > could think about it.lol Angel > > > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 Thanks for your kind responses! My mom was horrified along with me, but she wasn't for the surgery at all before I brought her to the meeting. She was willing to keep an open mind afterwards though; also she realised that the people in the support group don't necessarily reflect the quality of the procedure. I'm from New York City. NYU where Dr Ren is has a support group also, so that's a possibility. I haven't heard too much about Dr Ren though. Anyone know anything first- or second-hand about the program at NYU? Re: Angel > Dear Lynette, > I'm so sorry you had a bad experience. It really > suprises me! My experience has been so totally > opposite from yours! I'm not familiar with the NY > group but I'm sure there is some one on this list that > can guide you (anyone who can help out there?) I hope > this was just a bad night for the group and not the > norm. If you are feeling too uncomfortable about going > back, maybe you can find another group. Where exactly > are you from? Post us and someone on this list is > bound to be able to tell you who to talk to. > Investigate your options, then, when you've found a > group and Dr. you're comfortable with, take your mom > back and let her meet them. Or you could even let her > read some of your favorite posts that explain the > procedure or give advice on pre and post op issues. In > short order she will be able to see that you will have > quite a large support group! My mom is so impressed > with the way people on this list pull for each other. > She's never seen anything like it! With all the info > that is out there her mind is much more at ease with > the idea of this surgery. Good luck on your search. > Stay here with us and I know you'll find what you > seek. All the good souls on this list won't let you > down. Your supportive friend, Angel Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 Thanks for your kind responses! My mom was horrified along with me, but she wasn't for the surgery at all before I brought her to the meeting. She was willing to keep an open mind afterwards though; also she realised that the people in the support group don't necessarily reflect the quality of the procedure. I'm from New York City. NYU where Dr Ren is has a support group also, so that's a possibility. I haven't heard too much about Dr Ren though. Anyone know anything first- or second-hand about the program at NYU? Re: Angel > Dear Lynette, > I'm so sorry you had a bad experience. It really > suprises me! My experience has been so totally > opposite from yours! I'm not familiar with the NY > group but I'm sure there is some one on this list that > can guide you (anyone who can help out there?) I hope > this was just a bad night for the group and not the > norm. If you are feeling too uncomfortable about going > back, maybe you can find another group. Where exactly > are you from? Post us and someone on this list is > bound to be able to tell you who to talk to. > Investigate your options, then, when you've found a > group and Dr. you're comfortable with, take your mom > back and let her meet them. Or you could even let her > read some of your favorite posts that explain the > procedure or give advice on pre and post op issues. In > short order she will be able to see that you will have > quite a large support group! My mom is so impressed > with the way people on this list pull for each other. > She's never seen anything like it! With all the info > that is out there her mind is much more at ease with > the idea of this surgery. Good luck on your search. > Stay here with us and I know you'll find what you > seek. All the good souls on this list won't let you > down. Your supportive friend, Angel Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 17, 2001 Report Share Posted May 17, 2001 Hi Angel, I have to agree with Sherry on this one. I, also, have had NO luck with support groups other than these on line groups. In fact, the last one I went to, there were two men who absolutely would not SHUT UP!! They droned on and on about themselves and THEIR experiences. All I can say is that they were interesting for, oh, about the FIRST TWO MINUTES!! While we can't actually "see" each other here, this is by FAR the BEST support group I have ever been lucky enough to know of. For that matter, even if I weren't having WLS, I think I'd STILL be a member here, for the support is SO unconditional. I CAN understand how you would be upset that that is what your mother had to witness, though. Hopefully, she's already sold on you having the surgery, and that "group" you visited won't alter her opinion. Regardless, you have us. We have each other. There are times when I sit here and think Oh, I wish I could SEE you all, or at least be in the same room with you all. You wanna hear something kind of funny? When I picture ALL of you in my mind, you are all THIN people!! It's like I'm the only overweight one for some reason. Whacko, isn't it? At any rate, feel free to talk to us any time, about anything. Hugs, Pam Pre-op in MD Dr. Vanguri Surgery date July 9, 2001 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 17, 2001 Report Share Posted May 17, 2001 Lynette, I am a pre-op patient of Dr. Ren's, due for surgery on 6/26. She was recommended to me by my Internist of 28 years. I trust him with my life, and by extension, I am willing to trust her with it as well. At my consult with her, I was impressed by her examinationation of me and her clear, concise description of both the RNY and BPD/DS procedures. She does both procedures but we both decided that the lap DS procedure would be best for my needs and life style. She trained with and presented at least one paper (I believe)with Dr. Gagner of Mt. Sinai; he is considered one of the foremost practitioners of lap DS. Dr. Ren is the head of NYU's new Thin for Life program. You will probably hear many good things from her post-op patients; you may hear the opposite as well. All I can say is, if you're interested, meet with her and make up your own mind. There is a support website organized by her post-ops under the aegis of:NYUMC-thinforlife . Also, they have started a support group, see below: PLEASE COME TO DR. REN'S SUPPORT GROUP. IT WILL BE HELD ON THE THIRD THURSDAY OF EACH MONTH FROM 6:00 TO 8:00 P.M. THE FIRST HOUR IS FOR POST-OPS AND THE SECOND HOUR IS FOR PRE-OPS AND INFO SEEKERS. EVERYONE IS WELCOME TO ATTEND AND STAY FOR THE ENTIRE MEETING. NEXT SUPPORT GROUP MEETING WILL BE HELD ON THURSDAY, MAY 17, 2001 FROM 6:00 P.M. TO 8:00 P.M. NYU RUSK INSTITUTE OF REHAB MEDICINE 400 EAST 34TH STREET IN ROOM R111 CALL AND SPEAK WITH LES GALLO-SILVER, CSW FOR MORE INFO. DR. REN, BARRIE (NUTRITIONIST) AND GIO (NURSE PRACTIONER) WILL BE IN ATTENDANCE. Hope this has been some help, Marcia > Re: Angel > > > Thanks for your kind responses! My mom was horrified along with > me, but she > wasn't for the surgery at all before I brought her to the meeting. She was > willing to keep an open mind afterwards though; also she realised that the > people in the support group don't necessarily reflect the quality of the > procedure. I'm from New York City. NYU where Dr Ren is has a support group > also, so that's a possibility. I haven't heard too much about Dr > Ren though. > Anyone know anything first- or second-hand about the program at NYU? > Re: Angel > > > > Dear Lynette, > > I'm so sorry you had a bad experience. It really > > suprises me! My experience has been so totally > > opposite from yours! I'm not familiar with the NY > > group but I'm sure there is some one on this list that > > can guide you (anyone who can help out there?) I hope > > this was just a bad night for the group and not the > > norm. If you are feeling too uncomfortable about going > > back, maybe you can find another group. Where exactly > > are you from? Post us and someone on this list is > > bound to be able to tell you who to talk to. > > Investigate your options, then, when you've found a > > group and Dr. you're comfortable with, take your mom > > back and let her meet them. Or you could even let her > > read some of your favorite posts that explain the > > procedure or give advice on pre and post op issues. In > > short order she will be able to see that you will have > > quite a large support group! My mom is so impressed > > with the way people on this list pull for each other. > > She's never seen anything like it! With all the info > > that is out there her mind is much more at ease with > > the idea of this surgery. Good luck on your search. > > Stay here with us and I know you'll find what you > > seek. All the good souls on this list won't let you > > down. Your supportive friend, Angel > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 17, 2001 Report Share Posted May 17, 2001 Lynette, I am a pre-op patient of Dr. Ren's, due for surgery on 6/26. She was recommended to me by my Internist of 28 years. I trust him with my life, and by extension, I am willing to trust her with it as well. At my consult with her, I was impressed by her examinationation of me and her clear, concise description of both the RNY and BPD/DS procedures. She does both procedures but we both decided that the lap DS procedure would be best for my needs and life style. She trained with and presented at least one paper (I believe)with Dr. Gagner of Mt. Sinai; he is considered one of the foremost practitioners of lap DS. Dr. Ren is the head of NYU's new Thin for Life program. You will probably hear many good things from her post-op patients; you may hear the opposite as well. All I can say is, if you're interested, meet with her and make up your own mind. There is a support website organized by her post-ops under the aegis of:NYUMC-thinforlife . Also, they have started a support group, see below: PLEASE COME TO DR. REN'S SUPPORT GROUP. IT WILL BE HELD ON THE THIRD THURSDAY OF EACH MONTH FROM 6:00 TO 8:00 P.M. THE FIRST HOUR IS FOR POST-OPS AND THE SECOND HOUR IS FOR PRE-OPS AND INFO SEEKERS. EVERYONE IS WELCOME TO ATTEND AND STAY FOR THE ENTIRE MEETING. NEXT SUPPORT GROUP MEETING WILL BE HELD ON THURSDAY, MAY 17, 2001 FROM 6:00 P.M. TO 8:00 P.M. NYU RUSK INSTITUTE OF REHAB MEDICINE 400 EAST 34TH STREET IN ROOM R111 CALL AND SPEAK WITH LES GALLO-SILVER, CSW FOR MORE INFO. DR. REN, BARRIE (NUTRITIONIST) AND GIO (NURSE PRACTIONER) WILL BE IN ATTENDANCE. Hope this has been some help, Marcia > Re: Angel > > > Thanks for your kind responses! My mom was horrified along with > me, but she > wasn't for the surgery at all before I brought her to the meeting. She was > willing to keep an open mind afterwards though; also she realised that the > people in the support group don't necessarily reflect the quality of the > procedure. I'm from New York City. NYU where Dr Ren is has a support group > also, so that's a possibility. I haven't heard too much about Dr > Ren though. > Anyone know anything first- or second-hand about the program at NYU? > Re: Angel > > > > Dear Lynette, > > I'm so sorry you had a bad experience. It really > > suprises me! My experience has been so totally > > opposite from yours! I'm not familiar with the NY > > group but I'm sure there is some one on this list that > > can guide you (anyone who can help out there?) I hope > > this was just a bad night for the group and not the > > norm. If you are feeling too uncomfortable about going > > back, maybe you can find another group. Where exactly > > are you from? Post us and someone on this list is > > bound to be able to tell you who to talk to. > > Investigate your options, then, when you've found a > > group and Dr. you're comfortable with, take your mom > > back and let her meet them. Or you could even let her > > read some of your favorite posts that explain the > > procedure or give advice on pre and post op issues. In > > short order she will be able to see that you will have > > quite a large support group! My mom is so impressed > > with the way people on this list pull for each other. > > She's never seen anything like it! With all the info > > that is out there her mind is much more at ease with > > the idea of this surgery. Good luck on your search. > > Stay here with us and I know you'll find what you > > seek. All the good souls on this list won't let you > > down. Your supportive friend, Angel > > > > ---------------------------------------------------------------------- > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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