Embarrassment at using aids

[Guest guest]

Maybe it is because I have had to use a walker for so long now but I

truly think that our perception that people are staring is largely a

reflection of our own self consciousness. I am totally comfortable with

using the walker now and was specifically taking note when I was down

the shopping mall tonight - I can honestly say that nobody stared.

Sure, some people looked twice but I find if you act as though you are

perfectly comfortable with the situation people not only don't stare but

are usually downright helpful. When I got out to my car at the end the

people next to me (a couple with learner driver daughter, none of whom

looked particularly disabled even though they had a disabled parking

permit) firstly commented on how great my car was (a lot of people do as

they don't expect a disabled dude to be driving a muscle car) and then

asked if I needed help putting the walker in the car etc.. I never

accept those offers because then I stiffen right up and can hardly move

to get in the car. However, it's good that they think to ask and I

always have strangers opening doors for me etc wherever I go.

I can remember when I first used a cane and again when I first used the

walking frame I felt as if half the world was staring at me. I know now

that they weren't and it was only me thinking they were. Sure, an

occasional person may stare, especially kids, but some of them stare at

anything. When you get comfortable with the situation I am positive you

will come to see that you were only imagining that the eyes of the world

are on you. How many times have you heard people say that they felt

like everyone was staring at them after they totally changed their

hairstyle (not outlandishly) or wore something that they would never

normally wear? Again, a reflection of their perception and not the true

situation. When we feel self conscious we feel that the eyes of the

world are on us when in actual fact most people couldn't give a damn and

are just going about their business.

My 2.78c worth (with inflation)

belgium46@... wrote:

> , I know the stares are hard in the beginning using a walker but

> after

> awhile they fade away. It became for me much easier to get around no

> fear of

> falling now that I had something to lean on. Hey take advantage of

> those

> moments when people open up doors and let you in ahead of then and

> getting off

> elevators first! You also make them feel good helping you. Flora

gary duke wrote: Yes, I do have one. If I can mentally get over having

to use it I know the walker will help. I did take it last month to the

mall and it came in handy. I just didnt like the staring-but it is

better then falling.