Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 Hi Group: I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! Rita Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 Rita, I know it is isn't easy and I have those thoughts. I do not want to go into a nurshing home or my children home./ I want to be independent. I am just head strong as I have always been. I am now working on my will and have bought my urn to be cremated in and am trying to take off some of the burden of passing. If I am left alone I will just have to deal with it the best I can. I know I will ne ver be happy again. So hope I go first. at least do for himself. Anyway I told him where to spread some of my ashes and the other to put on the mantel and if he remarried I would haunt him the rest of his life. HA HA. When he passes we can be put togeather in one urn and then spread where we want to be. By the way my urn is just beautiful. I t is a beautiful blue and gold and stands about 16 inches high and has gold figures of women on the handles. I do hope you are feeling better now. May be you had a good laugh about what I said. Jane Anne PLS Hurdle > Hi Group: > > I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle > with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this > group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have > had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, > but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's > anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live > in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 > years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has > been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe > fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has > jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo > it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, > and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It > was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. > What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who > know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about > emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to > happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed > and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a > wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. > I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that > phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and > when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. > > Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! > > Rita > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 All, I know this is a subject we have all thought of. My biggest fear was dying alone or being alone when the time comes near. My wife passed two years ago and we would joke about dying. I said I wanted to be cremated but have my eyes taken out first then my ashes put in a pickle jar then my eyes put in then I wanted to be placed on the mantel. This way I could watch her and her boy friend. But she went before me. I did find a very wounderful woman that accepts my PLS and is very supportive. I have been adjusting to everything that changes but the end, I could not get my mind to handle it. I have prayed and talked to my minister but I was still scared. I guess we are all scared of that moment and I we can do is put our trust into the All Mighty and pray that things will work out. It is a good idea to make arrangements ahead of time so things are not left to our kids or loved ones. As it was told to me a long time ago if you want things a sertain way you better set it up as no one will do what you want and you will not be there to tell tthem what to do. I better stop now but get things togeather and put your trust in the All Mighty. Dennis in Alabama --- King gking@...> wrote: > Rita, > > I know it is isn't easy and I have those > thoughts. I do not want > to go into a nurshing home or my children home./ I > want to be independent. I > am just head strong as I have always been. I am now > working on my will and > have bought my urn to be cremated in and am trying > to take off some of the > burden of passing. If I am left alone I will just > have to deal with it the > best I can. I know I will ne ver be happy again. So > hope I go first. at > least do for himself. Anyway I told him where to > spread some of my ashes and > the other to put on the mantel and if he remarried > I would haunt him the > rest of his life. HA HA. > When he passes we can be put togeather in one urn > and then spread where we > want to be. By the way my urn is just beautiful. I > t is a beautiful blue > and gold and stands about 16 inches high and has > gold figures of women on > the handles. I do hope you are feeling better now. > May be you had a good > laugh about what I said. > > > Jane Anne > PLS Hurdle > > > > Hi Group: > > > > I want to share with you another hurdle I am > facing with my own battle > > with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears > and thoughts with this > > group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a > lot of you know I have > > had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my > life style accordingly, > > but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold > two home's > > anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS > in 1986. I now live > > in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with > my dear husband of 45 > > years. I have realized in this past year that my > physical condition has > > been changing and getting worse. My ability to > function without severe > > fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my > weight (which has > > jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). > So i kinda poo poo > > it, until last week. went to our local > hospital for a cat scan, > > and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a > reality check!!! It > > was then I realized how much I can't do, and how > much I depend on him. > > What the scary part is will be 82 in > September, and for those who > > know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set > in, and talk about > > emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, > thinking whats going to > > happen to me if he were not here. For two days I > sat around depressed > > and feared the thoughts of being alone with out > him. Oh I have a > > wonderful support system of family and friends, > but it's not the same. > > I realized that I was hurting myself physically by > worrying about that > > phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in > these past 30 years, and > > when the time comes I will have to deal with it, > and do the best I can. > > > > Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, > it ain't easy!!!! > > > > Rita > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 I think about these same things at 52 Lynn PLS Hurdle Hi Group: I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! Rita Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 There are those of us who live alone and don't have any close friends or family nearby. Shoot, if I croak tomorrow it will probably be about two weeks before anyone finds my body, if it's even that fast. I don't envy the person who does, either. Not at all. But it is interesting that we'll take a semester of French or Spanish or something but not a course on dying, there isn't even one offered. When is the last time your church held a seminar on death? We are all going to croak sooner or later yet we run around pretending it just isn't going to happen to us. Well, you maybe, but certainly not me. Even super-religious people all but ignore it, even while claiming a belief in an existence far superior to this after death. Galen Hekhuis NpD, JFR, GWA ghekhuis@... Hell hath no fury like a bird in the hand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 Rita, I think we all have those same thoughts being left alone without our partners. Your a strong lady and I'm sure has had the same thoughts to. Like you said you have family that you have around you. Nobody knows what lies ahead just live life daily that's all we can do. We can't dwell on the what if's in life but just what is happening now. Flora Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 To Rita and Galen....my 2 cents. Living alone and being very close to dying in March, I must say Galen dying is the easy part. In fact there were times I was begging for it. But those moments were in between my desparate calls to the kids with the lists of things to do to make the process easier for them. Losing a spouse of 45+ years is quite a life passage for even the healthiest. I talk to 3 sweet ladies who have lost their long-term spouses within the last 2 years...they still breakdown and sob about every two weeks because of the hole in their heart that cannot be filled. Galen, I think that hole you and I have in our hearts was shot out and we each found a piece of cast iron to cover it.....which explains why I have not participated in the 'someone for everyone' conversations of late. The more I experience people the more I like my dog. lol Rita I think what you are experiencing is an early grieving - a what if scenario which is really needed to get us though such great losses. Just remember that we are not in control of when we leave this world. I have buried 7 good friends who patted me on the back with tears in their eyes and void to be with me on my dying day. Now if anyone starts that sentence I tell them to stop because they are dooming themselves. Rita Thanks for sharing with us. Galen help me creat a sling this cast iron thing gets heavy to carry around. Eva Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2006 Report Share Posted May 19, 2006 briteeyestwo wrote: > To Rita and Galen....my 2 cents. Living alone and being very close to > dying in March, I must say Galen dying is the easy part. In fact > there were times I was begging for it. But those moments were in > between my desparate calls to the kids with the lists of things to do > to make the process easier for them. > Losing a spouse of 45+ years is quite a life passage for even the > healthiest. I talk to 3 sweet ladies who have lost their long-term > spouses within the last 2 years...they still breakdown and sob about > every two weeks because of the hole in their heart that cannot be > filled. > Galen, I think that hole you and I have in our hearts was shot out > and we each found a piece of cast iron to cover it.....which explains > why I have not participated in the 'someone for everyone' > conversations of late. The more I experience people the more I like > my dog. lol > > Rita I think what you are experiencing is an early grieving - a what > if scenario which is really needed to get us though such great > losses. Just remember that we are not in control of when we leave > this world. I have buried 7 good friends who patted me on the back > with tears in their eyes and void to be with me on my dying day. Now > if anyone starts that sentence I tell them to stop because they are > dooming themselves. > Rita Thanks for sharing with us. > Galen help me creat a sling this cast iron thing gets heavy to carry > around. > Eva > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 20, 2006 Report Share Posted May 20, 2006 Lkgentner@... wrote: > Yes, Rita, and all...it's a very real fact that we can't help but think > about. I know we gloss over a lot of posts but when it comes to > ourselves, then > we really think more about it. Recently Thurza wrote how long it > took her to > get ready in the mornings with the daily personal needs when Jim went to > their kids for a week. Craig has had a couple of trips lately and > although he > brought it more food than I could ever eat, it ain't easy...that's > for sure. > One day I thought I'd try and run the vacuum...what a joke. I ended up > sitting on the sofa and reaching as far as I could. Rita, does the > robot vacuum > really work? > > You may have read that one of our dearest friends just passed away and > she > was 6 months older than me and how I'm dreading the service this > Sunday and all > 4 of us had planned on going to Hawaii at the end of this month and > that her > husband still plans to go because he needs to get away. I know it's > going > to be so hard because Jeannette won't be there but she will be there in > spirit; I hope I can hold it together. I'm hoping I'll be able to > put his feelings > first and be strong altho if the emotions kick in...that'll be another > thing. > > I talked to Craig about it and tried to talk about " if that we > me " ....and he > didn't want to talk about it. I've told him I have to first > because...well, > you all know....and I don't have biological kids that I go live > with. It's > not morbid, it's a fact of our lives. We've had our will/trust in > place for > a long time EXCEPT the pages on " my wishes " ...that was too sobering. > > Enough of this....hope you all have a nice weekend, > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 20, 2006 Report Share Posted May 20, 2006 King wrote: > Rita, > > I know it is isn't easy and I have those thoughts. I do not > want > to go into a nurshing home or my children home./ I want to be > independent. I > am just head strong as I have always been. I am now working on my > will and > have bought my urn to be cremated in and am trying to take off some of > the > burden of passing. If I am left alone I will just have to deal with it > the > best I can. I know I will ne ver be happy again. So hope I go first. > at > least do for himself. Anyway I told him where to spread some of my > ashes and > the other to put on the mantel and if he remarried I would haunt him > the > rest of his life. HA HA. > When he passes we can be put togeather in one urn and then spread > where we > want to be. By the way my urn is just beautiful. I t is a beautiful blue > and gold and stands about 16 inches high and has gold figures of women on > the handles. I do hope you are feeling better now. May be you had a good > laugh about what I said. > > > Jane Anne > PLS Hurdle > > > > Hi Group: > > > > I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle > > with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this > > group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have > > had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, > > but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's > > anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live > > in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 > > years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has > > been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe > > fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has > > jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo > > it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, > > and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It > > was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. > > What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who > > know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about > > emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to > > happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed > > and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a > > wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. > > I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that > > phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and > > when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. > > > > Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! > > > > Rita > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 21, 2006 Report Share Posted May 21, 2006 I commented once on this topic but wanted to add that i am not so much afraid of death itself, but sure would like to know when it will occur!! of course i know all things happen when it is time for them to happen. these are things i think about at 35. tawny Lynn Holmes lynn.holmes@...> wrote: I think about these same things at 52 Lynn PLS Hurdle Hi Group: I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! Rita Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 21, 2006 Report Share Posted May 21, 2006 I commented once on this topic but wanted to add that i am not so much afraid of death itself, but sure would like to know when it will occur!! of course i know all things happen when it is time for them to happen. these are things i think about at 35. tawny Lynn Holmes lynn.holmes@...> wrote: I think about these same things at 52 Lynn PLS Hurdle Hi Group: I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! Rita Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 21, 2006 Report Share Posted May 21, 2006 I commented once on this topic but wanted to add that i am not so much afraid of death itself, but sure would like to know when it will occur!! of course i know all things happen when it is time for them to happen. these are things i think about at 35. tawny Lynn Holmes lynn.holmes@...> wrote: I think about these same things at 52 Lynn PLS Hurdle Hi Group: I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! Rita Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 21, 2006 Report Share Posted May 21, 2006 THSC wrote: > I commented once on this topic but wanted to add that i am not so much > afraid of death itself, but sure would like to know when it will > occur!! of course i know all things happen when it is time for them > to happen. these are things i think about at 35. > tawny > > Lynn Holmes lynn.holmes@...> wrote: > I think about these same things at 52 > > Lynn > > PLS Hurdle > > Hi Group: > > I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle > with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this > group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have > had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, > but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's > anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live > in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 > years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has > been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe > fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has > jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo > it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, > and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It > was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. > What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who > know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about > emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to > happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed > and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a > wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. > I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that > phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and > when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. > > Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! > > Rita > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 21, 2006 Report Share Posted May 21, 2006 THSC wrote: > I commented once on this topic but wanted to add that i am not so much > afraid of death itself, but sure would like to know when it will > occur!! of course i know all things happen when it is time for them > to happen. these are things i think about at 35. > tawny > > Lynn Holmes lynn.holmes@...> wrote: > I think about these same things at 52 > > Lynn > > PLS Hurdle > > Hi Group: > > I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle > with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this > group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have > had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, > but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's > anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live > in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 > years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has > been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe > fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has > jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo > it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, > and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It > was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. > What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who > know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about > emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to > happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed > and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a > wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. > I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that > phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and > when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. > > Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! > > Rita > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 21, 2006 Report Share Posted May 21, 2006 THSC wrote: > I commented once on this topic but wanted to add that i am not so much > afraid of death itself, but sure would like to know when it will > occur!! of course i know all things happen when it is time for them > to happen. these are things i think about at 35. > tawny > > Lynn Holmes lynn.holmes@...> wrote: > I think about these same things at 52 > > Lynn > > PLS Hurdle > > Hi Group: > > I want to share with you another hurdle I am facing with my own battle > with PLS. I usually don't share my inner fears and thoughts with this > group as most of the time I am very upbeat. As a lot of you know I have > had PLS for over 30 years, and have adjusted my life style accordingly, > but the next hurdle is scary for me. I have sold two home's > anticipating the worse of being diagnosed with PLS in 1986. I now live > in a senior citizen (handicapped apartment), with my dear husband of 45 > years. I have realized in this past year that my physical condition has > been changing and getting worse. My ability to function without severe > fatigue is a big factor, and I figured it was my weight (which has > jumped up a few pounds) and my age (70 next week). So i kinda poo poo > it, until last week. went to our local hospital for a cat scan, > and I was left alone for 3 hours, and talk about a reality check!!! It > was then I realized how much I can't do, and how much I depend on him. > What the scary part is will be 82 in September, and for those who > know him, he is a very young 82. The panic set in, and talk about > emotional crying, I sure did my share that day, thinking whats going to > happen to me if he were not here. For two days I sat around depressed > and feared the thoughts of being alone with out him. Oh I have a > wonderful support system of family and friends, but it's not the same. > I realized that I was hurting myself physically by worrying about that > phase of PLS, and I have had many hurdle's in these past 30 years, and > when the time comes I will have to deal with it, and do the best I can. > > Just wanted to share my thoughts with all of you, it ain't easy!!!! > > Rita > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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