Zsolt

[Guest guest]

Dear Friends,

I'm not sure if any of you have heard the news, so I am going to break it to

you.

Zsolt passed away on Christmas Eve, December 24, 2005.

Back in August, when I realized Zsolt didn't have access to e-mail anymore,

I started writing to him 3-4 times a week. I knew he couldn't write back to

me (although he did dictate a few letters and had an aide write them out) and

I often sent him questionnaires which he could check a " yes " or " no " box on.

On September 2 he dictated the following: " As for me, I'm struggling. I

barely eat, and breathing is becoming increasingly difficult. Since I don't

wish

to live with a ventilator and feeding tube, I don't see how I can survive for

long. I pushed myself hard during the summer with outings. I wanted the

Z-Team buddies to have a summer they would never forget, especially the young

guys. That in the midst of making money and having families, there is something

life-affirming about listening to great music, helping comrades, watching the

sunset, etcetera. This I accomplished and am now exhausted. I don't mention

this to you to make you worry, but so you won't be taken by surprise if

things change quickly. "

On September 12 he actually hand wrote the following note to me. It was very

lightly written, barely legible, and you could tell it took extreme effort

for him to form each character in each sentence:

" Dear Lyn & Verle, I just want to let you know we initiated Hospice care on

Friday. Tough decision, but I'm relieved. I just want to enjoy the time

remaining with my Z-Team buddies. I've stopped all visits, so you needn't worry

about trying to come see me. But please continue writing. I love you, Zsolt "

On September 26 he answered a questionnaire for me with indications that I

would be notified upon his death and that he wanted me to notify PLS-Friends

and PLSers-NEWS of his death.

On October 4 he dictated: " I deteriorate more rapidly w/each passing week.

I'm not complaining because I'm ready to die. I've had a good life. I only

hope that I'm not too much a burden to people in this last stage -- part of the

reason I don't want to linger. "

On October 28 he dictated: " My body continues to shrink with surprising

speed. The toxicity in my system is beginning to effect my sense of time and

place and people. "

And on December 14, in response to my questionnaire, he indicated he no

longer could read my letters and had to have his aides read them to him.

So, on December 26, 2005, I received a phone call from Zsolt's good friend,

Courtenay, who told me that Zsolt had passed away on Christmas Eve. I

e-mailed Fant who was Zsolt's best buddy and power of attorney. He sent

me an

attachment containing a brief biography of Zsolt, a picture of him, and the

obituary notice he wrote for the paper.

If anyone would like copies of these I will be glad to forward them to you.

There are 3 separate files, so if you can't unzip an attachment let me know

and I will send three separate e-mails to you. You can e-mail me at

_lyndalgbrown@..._ (mailto:lyndalgbrown@...) . Because Yahoo hides the

last

part, if you can't decipher it, it is aol.com

Lyndal