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Hi, welcome to the group. My daughter raged, rarely does now but keeps it more

in check. I guess I would be worried too, after she has the babies her

hormones are going to go whacko and could really affect her depression. Will

she even talk about this? Is she seeing a doctor throughout the pregancy. It

is something her doctor should know about. I've been there, it's ugly.

It seems that this is all out of your hands, but not out of your heart.

That's the hard part. Keep up with this group, they are a Godsend.

nlslovesme nlslovesme@...> wrote:

Hello Jean,

It is all a very long story but I will try to keep it as short as

possible. Just over a year and a half ago, 's school

counselor (we attend church with him so we know him really well)

called my husband at work and informed him that had been

cutting herself. When my husband called and told me, I had no idea

what he was talking about. I had never heard of someone cutting

themselves. We both took off work and went and picked her up from

school. When we got home, I started calling around trying to find

someone...anyone...to get her in to see about it. I finally reached

someone at a crisis center and we were told to bring her in right

away. We got there and we were talked to and then she was talked to

then the counselor told us that she was severly depressed and they

were advising she be admitted to a hospital for treatment. We were

given several choices of hospitals in larger cities to take her to.

We picked one and off we went. She was admitted that night and

stayed for a week. Before she could be released, we had to have an

appointment with a therapist and a doctor that could treat her. She

was seeing the therapist and really making progress until this guy

stepped into the picture (by the way, he was 19 at the time and is

20 now). To answer your question, yes, she has been physical with

my husband (kicking, hitting, etc). There were several times that I

almost called the sheriffs department to have them come pick her up,

but my pride wouldn't let me. She has always been closer to her dad

than to me. I have always been the one to take her verbal abuse and

now I find myself afraid to even try to contact her...I let my

husband get in touch with her for me. Believe me, I have tried to

reach out to her, but... She does not work and he works part-time

making $6.50 an hour. They buy stuff like they have nothing else to

spend the money on. Their phone has been cut off yet they can

afford to buy an entertainment center. They can't afford to run the

air conditioner (we live in a HOT southern state)yet they can afford

to have Direct TV hooked up. It goes on and on.

Donna

>

> Donna

>

> Welcome to our group. I am sure you will find comfort and

support here.

>

> How old is the guy who your daughter is living with? Are they

both working?

> Have they both completed high school, GED?

>

> She seems excited about the baby. Why do you think she will be

abusive?

> Plenty of kids have babies even younger than your daughter and

put their lives

> back together. If she is not asking for help from you, it would

appear she

> is showing some signs of taking responsibility.

>

> What was she doing that you made her see a therapist? Was she

abusive to you

> or your husband?

>

> Jean

>

>

>

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Guest guest

She is seeing a doctor with her pregnancy but not with the depression. She was

seeing a child psychiatrist but when she left our home, back in January, she has

not been back to him...or her therapist. She was on medication before she left

but she said that it didn't help. We could sure see a difference when she wasn't

taking it. In fact, we knew when she had stopped taking it just by the way she

acted towards us. I really don't know what all she has told her doctor. I

can't find out because of the doctor/patient confidentiality. It is all so

frustrating. I feel like we run into a brick wall with every turn we make.

Donna

Jamal Jilao somalitamale@...> wrote:

Hi, welcome to the group. My daughter raged, rarely does now but keeps

it more in check. I guess I would be worried too, after she has the babies her

hormones are going to go whacko and could really affect her depression. Will she

even talk about this? Is she seeing a doctor throughout the pregancy. It is

something her doctor should know about. I've been there, it's ugly.

It seems that this is all out of your hands, but not out of your heart. That's

the hard part. Keep up with this group, they are a Godsend.

nlslovesme nlslovesme@...> wrote: Hello Jean,

It is all a very long story but I will try to keep it as short as

possible. Just over a year and a half ago, 's school

counselor (we attend church with him so we know him really well)

called my husband at work and informed him that had been

cutting herself. When my husband called and told me, I had no idea

what he was talking about. I had never heard of someone cutting

themselves. We both took off work and went and picked her up from

school. When we got home, I started calling around trying to find

someone...anyone...to get her in to see about it. I finally reached

someone at a crisis center and we were told to bring her in right

away. We got there and we were talked to and then she was talked to

then the counselor told us that she was severly depressed and they

were advising she be admitted to a hospital for treatment. We were

given several choices of hospitals in larger cities to take her to.

We picked one and off we went. She was admitted that night and

stayed for a week. Before she could be released, we had to have an

appointment with a therapist and a doctor that could treat her. She

was seeing the therapist and really making progress until this guy

stepped into the picture (by the way, he was 19 at the time and is

20 now). To answer your question, yes, she has been physical with

my husband (kicking, hitting, etc). There were several times that I

almost called the sheriffs department to have them come pick her up,

but my pride wouldn't let me. She has always been closer to her dad

than to me. I have always been the one to take her verbal abuse and

now I find myself afraid to even try to contact her...I let my

husband get in touch with her for me. Believe me, I have tried to

reach out to her, but... She does not work and he works part-time

making $6.50 an hour. They buy stuff like they have nothing else to

spend the money on. Their phone has been cut off yet they can

afford to buy an entertainment center. They can't afford to run the

air conditioner (we live in a HOT southern state)yet they can afford

to have Direct TV hooked up. It goes on and on.

Donna

>

> Donna

>

> Welcome to our group. I am sure you will find comfort and

support here.

>

> How old is the guy who your daughter is living with? Are they

both working?

> Have they both completed high school, GED?

>

> She seems excited about the baby. Why do you think she will be

abusive?

> Plenty of kids have babies even younger than your daughter and

put their lives

> back together. If she is not asking for help from you, it would

appear she

> is showing some signs of taking responsibility.

>

> What was she doing that you made her see a therapist? Was she

abusive to you

> or your husband?

>

> Jean

>

>

>

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Guest guest

>...I let my

> husband get in touch with her for me. Believe me, I

> have tried to

> reach out to her, but...

Hi Donna,

What a difficult situation! And complicated with a

pregnancy to boot. I haven't had quite this situation

to deal with, but I did want to say that it is NOT a

cop-out to have your husband doing the contacting.

We've done this, too. After years and years of grief

and fighting, my husband finally took over the

communications with our daughter. We are doing much

better these days, and she is delighted to have

communication going with both of us--so it really did

pay off in the end. It forced my husband into having

more direct contact with her, which she has really

appreciated. Not to mention that I really needed it!

While your husband is handling that, you take care of

yourself.

I am praying for you all and for the baby, too!

Deborah

__________________________________________________

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  • 6 months later...

1. Name: Carol Guyer

2. City and state: Lowell MI

3. Are you a Southern California resident? No

4. Would you like to be added to our in person luncheon guest list? No

3. Email address:carol-guyer@...

4. Obesity Help Profile name and/or OH URL:

5. Are you: Considering Surgery, Pre Op or Post Op Between

Considering and pre op

6. Date of WLS: unknown at this time

7. Surgeon's Name: Dr Foote

8. Type of Surgery: Unknown at this time

9. Highest Pre Surgery Weight: 330

10. Insurance or self pay: Insurance

11. What is the name of your insurance company that covered your WLS:

BCBS and Medicare

12.Birthdate: 07/21/1951

13.Occupation:diabled

14.Hobbies:llamas, goats, sheep, and fiber arts like spinning,

weaving and carding my own fiber

15.Anything you would like the other members to know about you? Iwork

in Llama rescue I am a member of the SELR. I have a broken back

Please feel free to omit any information you don't wish to share.

Your privacy is respected!

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LOWELL? That's only 20 miles from where I live and 10 miles from

where I work!

Ah yes, Dr. Foote at MMPC! I had Dr. Kemmeter at MMPC. Looks like we

have a lot in common Carol. Let me know if you have any MMPC

questions. So far they've been pretty awesome for/with me. I had my

surgery Jan 20, 2006.

A broken back? Ouch, that can't be fun.

Your a bit older than I am (38) but I can try to relate things in a

general sense and maybe give some ideas that you can alter a bit to

fit your unique situation. I'll bet you might have a daughter in her

late 20s or early 30s though right? I'm such a dog!!

Seriously though if you ever need a Costco shopping trip or want

someone to visit you at Spectrum Health's Blodgett campus if you

decide to have surgery I'll be happy to help out. Heck I can even

walk or bike from Heritage Hill to Blodgett Hospital now. If you wait

until summer I'll try jogging it.

I love goat cheese. Do you make it?

Mike in GR (NEIGHBORS!)

>

> 1. Name: Carol Guyer

>

> 2. City and state: Lowell MI

>

> 3. Are you a Southern California resident? No

>

> 4. Would you like to be added to our in person luncheon guest list?

No

>

> 3. Email address:carol-guyer@...

>

> 4. Obesity Help Profile name and/or OH URL:

>

> 5. Are you: Considering Surgery, Pre Op or Post Op Between

> Considering and pre op

>

> 6. Date of WLS: unknown at this time

>

> 7. Surgeon's Name: Dr Foote

>

> 8. Type of Surgery: Unknown at this time

>

> 9. Highest Pre Surgery Weight: 330

>

> 10. Insurance or self pay: Insurance

>

> 11. What is the name of your insurance company that covered your

WLS:

> BCBS and Medicare

>

> 12.Birthdate: 07/21/1951

>

> 13.Occupation:diabled

>

> 14.Hobbies:llamas, goats, sheep, and fiber arts like spinning,

> weaving and carding my own fiber

>

> 15.Anything you would like the other members to know about you?

Iwork

> in Llama rescue I am a member of the SELR. I have a broken back

>

> Please feel free to omit any information you don't wish to share.

> Your privacy is respected!

>

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Mike, you're such a dog! What a lucky guess.

Watch out Carol. Mike loves to sweet talk the girls around here.

in MI (Howell)

>

> WOW thank you Mike

>

> Yes I have a daughter that will be 27 next month.. Her name is

Trisha and she has a twin named ..

> This is an awesome group.

>

> How did you know I had a daughter? She is such a wonderful lady NOW

but when she was younger she was a pain in my butt. :0)

> Thank you for your wonderful note ..

>

> I have so many questions about this whole WLS thing but I have alot

of support.. I am lucky there..

> All my friends, our church members , and my family are behind me

but is it id nice to know there are more people out there to help me

through this whole thing

>

> Thank you

> Carol

> Re: hello

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

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