Guest guest Posted February 2, 2006 Report Share Posted February 2, 2006 Debbie, have you considered going to Alanon? No amount of scolding, advice, etc. will make your son hit bottom until he is there. He is a grown man and unfortunately he can choose to drink, or not drink. If he chooses not to show up for work, he'll soon suffer the consequences of that. It's good that your daughter will not take him to the liquor store anymore. Family can refuse to be a part of his bad choices for his own good. I sure hope things get better! Blondie In a message dated 2/1/2006 2:31:41 P.M. Central Standard Time, funnygirl1154@... writes: My son, back from Kentucky this month, is taking it's toll on me in other ways. All has been so good w/my daughter, I guess I let down my guard. Funny how things work. I sometimes wonder what plan God has for me. I'm living a very happy, fulfilling life. Now my son is back. At least w/him living in Ky, I didn't have the day to day issues in my face. He has a problem w/the bottle, he's 29, and just can't get it together. He means well, he's a good hard worker, if he could just lay off the drinking. Everyone has been helpful to him, he is staying w/my daughter's father, my ex, and I got him the job at my work, and my husband drives him each morning to the shop after being dropped off at my house at 6 am by his father. He's lucky he makes two days in a row. Everyday is another excuse. Today I got tired of his latest story why he didn't show up and was now late, I reamed him a new butthole. Couldn't help it, I'm just so tired of his antics. And boy does he come up w/some doozies. And he keeps calling my daughter to drive him to the liquor store. She has learned to say NO! Funny I told her how that works. She just laughed, knowing full well what I meant. How hard it is to say NO. Now she realizes how hard it was for me with her all those years. Oh well, just another chapter I guess. Maybe my life was going just a little TOO calm! UGH! Peace to all, DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 2, 2006 Report Share Posted February 2, 2006 In a message dated 2/2/2006 2:45:23 PM Eastern Standard Time, TxCoastGal@... writes: No amount of scolding, advice, etc. will make your son hit bottom until he is there. He is a grown man and unfortunately he can choose to drink, or not drink. Blondie, Thank you. I myself haven't gone to alanon. I do know better with his issues, back when he was 18 I had him removed from my home and got an RO on him because he was doing heroin. When he stopped the heroin, he immediately resorted to drinking and has been ever since. He doesn't drink beer, so he gets obliterated when he does drink. Even if he hasn't had a drink in two days, we can still smell alcohol on him. Sad. I said to my husband, he's running on alcohol, not blood. He's been attending the classes he is required to go to, I wish they would test him as part of the plan. I myself think he is attending just to passify them and get the requirements done to get his license back. All he needs now is the funds to accomplish this. My fear is he will get it back, and then lose it again. In Oct. 2004, he had gotten it back after years of not having it, then a week later, got himself smashed and took his dirtbike out on the road. The police called my home at 3 in the morning to tell me he was in the ER at the hospital. I left him there. What the heck was I gonna do, he's 28 yrs. old. They said they had to call someone because he was drunk and couldn't drive anywhere and someone had to be notified he was there. I guess I was it. His face was a mess. He's such a good guy and he's such a hard worker when he works. Just wish he could lay off the drinking. And he has every excuse in the book why he does. Now it's because he's away from his son and girlfriend. Can't be too bad away from her, I'm thinking. He's shacked up with anyone he can already since he's been here. I feel for any girl he meets here, he just uses them for rides, money, whatever they will buy him. DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 2, 2006 Report Share Posted February 2, 2006 Yeah - unfortunately they say it is a progressive disease. My daughter has done her stint with alcohol and drug addiction, that's for sure. She was hooked on pain killers, and I hope to goodness she's now off of them for good. We'll see. The children were totally suffering from neglect while she was doing these drugs. It was the hardest thing to know that. I have a really close cousin with a son that sounds a lot like yours. He's a bit older than your son. He's a good guy, but just can't stop from drinking or abusing script meds. Vicoden, etc. He is just now getting out of jail (again...) for violation of probation. He got mixed up with a gal that was doing identity theft. When they caught them they had quite a few credit cards and social security cards that were stolen. The worst of this for my cousin is that his wife is now bedridden with Altzheimer's and he can barely handle things as it is. Now he says he will give the son yet another chance to stay with them if he will 'help' with his mother. I feel really badly for all concerned. I honestly think that seeing his mother continuing to decline will probably make him drink more! Then my cousin will have two to take care of! I just hope he decides to do something else than sponge off his folks for awhile when he gets out of jail. Prayers for you and your son! Blondie In a message dated 2/2/2006 2:06:42 P.M. Central Standard Time, funnygirl1154@... writes: Blondie, Thank you. I myself haven't gone to alanon. I do know better with his issues, back when he was 18 I had him removed from my home and got an RO on him because he was doing heroin. When he stopped the heroin, he immediately resorted to drinking and has been ever since. He doesn't drink beer, so he gets obliterated when he does drink. Even if he hasn't had a drink in two days, we can still smell alcohol on him. Sad. I said to my husband, he's running on alcohol, not blood. He's been attending the classes he is required to go to, I wish they would test him as part of the plan. I myself think he is attending just to passify them and get the requirements done to get his license back. All he needs now is the funds to accomplish this. My fear is he will get it back, and then lose it again. In Oct. 2004, he had gotten it back after years of not having it, then a week later, got himself smashed and took his dirtbike out on the road. The police called my home at 3 in the morning to tell me he was in the ER at the hospital. I left him there. What the heck was I gonna do, he's 28 yrs. old. They said they had to call someone because he was drunk and couldn't drive anywhere and someone had to be notified he was there. I guess I was it. His face was a mess. He's such a good guy and he's such a hard worker when he works. Just wish he could lay off the drinking. And he has every excuse in the book why he does. Now it's because he's away from his son and girlfriend. Can't be too bad away from her, I'm thinking. He's shacked up with anyone he can already since he's been here. I feel for any girl he meets here, he just uses them for rides, money, whatever they will buy him. DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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