Re: YEAH!!! Shauna is back!!!!

[Guest guest]

Robyn,

You are our Yoda........

Mike T

YEAH!!! Shauna is back!!!!

> Welcome home Shauna. It is so good to see your name online.

>

> We all have busy lives and we owe it to ourselves to place our needs

> first, If we can't take care of ourselves we can't be there for anyone

> else. You have been and continue to be a terrific Moderator. We know

> you have a job, school, family and personal life. We have missed you

> but also know your plate is very full these days.

>

> Shauna, I don't have any words of wisdom for you. I too tried to " do it

> all " and my house of cards came tumbling down. I have accepted my

> limitations and do the best I can. I maintain a household in two

> cities as well as the myriad of stressors in my family and personal and

> professional lives. I have medical issues and good days and bad days

> that accompany those maladies.

>

> It was very hard, but I had to stop being the " caregiver. " I also ended

> unhealthy relationships with people who were takers and never gave to

> me when I needed their time and attention. Friendships should be a two

> way street. People who are takers are " Draino " friends. I don't have

> the time or energy to fix other peoples lives. I have seen too many

> people in our WLS community have surgery to " fix " their broken lives

> without wanting to do the work that comes with having a healthy life in

> the physical and emotional sense. I am glad to see you are tending to

> your needs and creating a foundation for a more successful future. You

> are blessed!

>

> An important factor in finding some semblance of peace in my life was

> setting BOUNDARIES. When I say NO, I mean NO!!! I don't answer email,

> phone calls or faxes after the close of normal business hours. When so

> called friends call me for legal advice, I remind them that I don't

> call them for FREE professional services unless they want to trade or

> barter. One hour of my legal help for a free

> haircut/color/highlights....you get the point. Time is money and my

> time is limited.

>

> As you can see, I am seldom online these days. My personal priorities

> come first. Don't worry about the boards. You take care of you first.

> That's what post op life is about. Don't worry about catching up. Just

> jump in when and if you have the spare time.

>

> My best to you always.

>

> Robyn

>

>

>

> We are a very active support group.

> If the email becomes overwhelming,

> please change your setting to NO EMAIL!

> Please contact Group Creator

> Robyn@...

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks Robyn, I have had to cut a lot in my life already just to get by doing

what I have. I have placed a lot on my plate and will have to prioritize it as I

go I guess. I sware I sat here for 5 hours today on posts and such and didn't

even break 12-27-06 conversation LOL! Doesn't look like I am going to either

hahaha.

Robyn LOSERS@...> wrote: Welcome home Shauna. It

is so good to see your name online.

We all have busy lives and we owe it to ourselves to place our needs

first, If we can't take care of ourselves we can't be there for anyone

else. You have been and continue to be a terrific Moderator. We know

you have a job, school, family and personal life. We have missed you

but also know your plate is very full these days.

Shauna, I don't have any words of wisdom for you. I too tried to " do it

all " and my house of cards came tumbling down. I have accepted my

limitations and do the best I can. I maintain a household in two

cities as well as the myriad of stressors in my family and personal and

professional lives. I have medical issues and good days and bad days

that accompany those maladies.

It was very hard, but I had to stop being the " caregiver. " I also ended

unhealthy relationships with people who were takers and never gave to

me when I needed their time and attention. Friendships should be a two

way street. People who are takers are " Draino " friends. I don't have

the time or energy to fix other peoples lives. I have seen too many

people in our WLS community have surgery to " fix " their broken lives

without wanting to do the work that comes with having a healthy life in

the physical and emotional sense. I am glad to see you are tending to

your needs and creating a foundation for a more successful future. You

are blessed!

An important factor in finding some semblance of peace in my life was

setting BOUNDARIES. When I say NO, I mean NO!!! I don't answer email,

phone calls or faxes after the close of normal business hours. When so

called friends call me for legal advice, I remind them that I don't

call them for FREE professional services unless they want to trade or

barter. One hour of my legal help for a free

haircut/color/highlights....you get the point. Time is money and my

time is limited.

As you can see, I am seldom online these days. My personal priorities

come first. Don't worry about the boards. You take care of you first.

That's what post op life is about. Don't worry about catching up. Just

jump in when and if you have the spare time.

My best to you always.

Robyn

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Not to put pressure on you, but " Bad Shauna " ....don't do that to us

again. Your posts are always either insightful or upbeat. I really

miss them when you're absent.

Really though. Robyn is right, all of us need to learn to put

ourselves first on occasion. I think a lot of us might not be in this

position if we had learned that lesson early on. I always drop

everything when someone needs something or I always try to accomodate

everyone else's schedule. When I got my date, I decided heck with

everyone else. It was probably the most inconvenient time for the

people I work with and it was not convenient for my friends and family

because of the holidays. I decided I was going to do it when I wanted

and too bad if they didn't like it. I never ask anyone for anything

and just decided this one time I was going to come first. It was

really a strange feeling.

-- In GastricBypass-LOSERS , " Robyn " wrote:

>

> Welcome home Shauna. It is so good to see your name online.

>

> We all have busy lives and we owe it to ourselves to place our needs

> first, If we can't take care of ourselves we can't be there for anyone

> else. You have been and continue to be a terrific Moderator. We know

> you have a job, school, family and personal life. We have missed you

> but also know your plate is very full these days.

>

> Shauna, I don't have any words of wisdom for you. I too tried to " do it

> all " and my house of cards came tumbling down. I have accepted my

> limitations and do the best I can. I maintain a household in two

> cities as well as the myriad of stressors in my family and personal and

> professional lives. I have medical issues and good days and bad days

> that accompany those maladies.

>

> It was very hard, but I had to stop being the " caregiver. " I also ended

> unhealthy relationships with people who were takers and never gave to

> me when I needed their time and attention. Friendships should be a two

> way street. People who are takers are " Draino " friends. I don't have

> the time or energy to fix other peoples lives. I have seen too many

> people in our WLS community have surgery to " fix " their broken lives

> without wanting to do the work that comes with having a healthy life in

> the physical and emotional sense. I am glad to see you are tending to

> your needs and creating a foundation for a more successful future. You

> are blessed!

>

> An important factor in finding some semblance of peace in my life was

> setting BOUNDARIES. When I say NO, I mean NO!!! I don't answer email,

> phone calls or faxes after the close of normal business hours. When so

> called friends call me for legal advice, I remind them that I don't

> call them for FREE professional services unless they want to trade or

> barter. One hour of my legal help for a free

> haircut/color/highlights....you get the point. Time is money and my

> time is limited.

>

> As you can see, I am seldom online these days. My personal priorities

> come first. Don't worry about the boards. You take care of you first.

> That's what post op life is about. Don't worry about catching up. Just

> jump in when and if you have the spare time.

>

> My best to you always.

>

> Robyn

>

[Guest guest]

This mental head crap is cyclical though folks. I have found in the

last few months that, by making regularly scheduled time for myself

and myself only I actually enjoy or at least don't notice that I'm

sacrificing time/effort for others. I certainly complain less I know

that (although come on, I'm always up for a healthy whine/bitch

session).

I've found my ex wife, other ladies, and my family/friends say things

like, " Are you sure you have time to do that? " and stuff. I guess

my " non-me " time seems more accessible and less precious to me than

when I didn't have any. I'm not constantly seeing my time as being

used up or taken from me because I always have some that is for me. I

can see how someone could take this to an extreme though and always

be into most/all of their time being for them and their interests

leading to them being a complete ass.

Way to choose your date around you! That's hot baby!

Mike in GR

> >

> > Welcome home Shauna. It is so good to see your name online.

> >

> > We all have busy lives and we owe it to ourselves to place our

needs

> > first, If we can't take care of ourselves we can't be there for

anyone

> > else. You have been and continue to be a terrific Moderator. We

know

> > you have a job, school, family and personal life. We have missed

you

> > but also know your plate is very full these days.

> >

> > Shauna, I don't have any words of wisdom for you. I too tried

to " do it

> > all " and my house of cards came tumbling down. I have accepted my

> > limitations and do the best I can. I maintain a household in two

> > cities as well as the myriad of stressors in my family and

personal and

> > professional lives. I have medical issues and good days and bad

days

> > that accompany those maladies.

> >

> > It was very hard, but I had to stop being the " caregiver. " I also

ended

> > unhealthy relationships with people who were takers and never

gave to

> > me when I needed their time and attention. Friendships should be

a two

> > way street. People who are takers are " Draino " friends. I don't

have

> > the time or energy to fix other peoples lives. I have seen too

many

> > people in our WLS community have surgery to " fix " their broken

lives

> > without wanting to do the work that comes with having a healthy

life in

> > the physical and emotional sense. I am glad to see you are

tending to

> > your needs and creating a foundation for a more successful

future. You

> > are blessed!

> >

> > An important factor in finding some semblance of peace in my life

was

> > setting BOUNDARIES. When I say NO, I mean NO!!! I don't answer

email,

> > phone calls or faxes after the close of normal business hours.

When so

> > called friends call me for legal advice, I remind them that I

don't

> > call them for FREE professional services unless they want to

trade or

> > barter. One hour of my legal help for a free

> > haircut/color/highlights....you get the point. Time is money and

my

> > time is limited.

> >

> > As you can see, I am seldom online these days. My personal

priorities

> > come first. Don't worry about the boards. You take care of you

first.

> > That's what post op life is about. Don't worry about catching up.

Just

> > jump in when and if you have the spare time.

> >

> > My best to you always.

> >

> > Robyn

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks Mike. I'm always up for being referred to as " hot " even if the

context is me being selfish.

> > >

> > > Welcome home Shauna. It is so good to see your name online.

> > >

> > > We all have busy lives and we owe it to ourselves to place our

> needs

> > > first, If we can't take care of ourselves we can't be there for

> anyone

> > > else. You have been and continue to be a terrific Moderator. We

> know

> > > you have a job, school, family and personal life. We have missed

> you

> > > but also know your plate is very full these days.

> > >

> > > Shauna, I don't have any words of wisdom for you. I too tried

> to " do it

> > > all " and my house of cards came tumbling down. I have accepted my

> > > limitations and do the best I can. I maintain a household in two

> > > cities as well as the myriad of stressors in my family and

> personal and

> > > professional lives. I have medical issues and good days and bad

> days

> > > that accompany those maladies.

> > >

> > > It was very hard, but I had to stop being the " caregiver. " I also

> ended

> > > unhealthy relationships with people who were takers and never

> gave to

> > > me when I needed their time and attention. Friendships should be

> a two

> > > way street. People who are takers are " Draino " friends. I don't

> have

> > > the time or energy to fix other peoples lives. I have seen too

> many

> > > people in our WLS community have surgery to " fix " their broken

> lives

> > > without wanting to do the work that comes with having a healthy

> life in

> > > the physical and emotional sense. I am glad to see you are

> tending to

> > > your needs and creating a foundation for a more successful

> future. You

> > > are blessed!

> > >

> > > An important factor in finding some semblance of peace in my life

> was

> > > setting BOUNDARIES. When I say NO, I mean NO!!! I don't answer

> email,

> > > phone calls or faxes after the close of normal business hours.

> When so

> > > called friends call me for legal advice, I remind them that I

> don't

> > > call them for FREE professional services unless they want to

> trade or

> > > barter. One hour of my legal help for a free

> > > haircut/color/highlights....you get the point. Time is money and

> my

> > > time is limited.

> > >

> > > As you can see, I am seldom online these days. My personal

> priorities

> > > come first. Don't worry about the boards. You take care of you

> first.

> > > That's what post op life is about. Don't worry about catching up.

> Just

> > > jump in when and if you have the spare time.

> > >

> > > My best to you always.

> > >

> > > Robyn

> > >

> >

>