Guest guest Posted March 23, 2006 Report Share Posted March 23, 2006 I'd say that the IUD is probably not a good idea. I had them for several years before having my tubes tied. They can make your periods much heavier and very painful, so she probably wouldn't like that, either. (And I had already had 2 children.) Do they still do those rods under the skin, or have they been taken off the market? > > Do any of your daughters use the IUD method of birth control? If so, are there any daughters who are using this method and have not ever had a child? Some of the info indicate that women who have never had a child should not consider the IUD as the method of choice. We have just gone through our first, and I hope our last abortion. We have tried other methods, but this is a girl who cannot remember to brush her own teeth. She has already tried the Depo shot for two years, gained 25 lbs., refused to take it again. She was pregnant immediately after resuming her first period. Also, info is saying they may be taking the Depo off the market because it is harming the heart and bones. Any information or feedback on this birth control method would be appreciated. Our daughter is 20, very immature, argumentative, lacking in social skills and self-control. We need a breather from this pregnancy problem because we have so many other problems with her on a daily/hourly basis. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2006 Report Share Posted March 24, 2006 In a message dated 3/23/2006 11:04:04 PM Eastern Standard Time, gabfwb@... writes: Our daughter is 20, very immature, argumentative, lacking in social skills and self-control. We need a breather from this pregnancy problem because we have so many other problems with her on a daily/hourly basis. Hi Gab? and Welcome. You have come to the right place. My daughter, now 19 has had two abortions one at 15 one at 17. I myself don't like the IUD's and my daughter doesn't have one, but she is on birth control pills. Ortho something. She has had no problems with them and is doing alright with them. Although my daughter is much further along than yours, reading my past posts to others here will help you. Your daughter is still living at home with you? Does she have a job? Hugs, DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2006 Report Share Posted March 24, 2006 In a message dated 3/24/2006 11:05:28 AM Eastern Standard Time, gabfwb@... writes: Our daughter was asked to leave the home last Dec. and she was gone for 23 days. At that point she said she did not want to live like a homeless person, wanted to come home and get a job Okay, you sit her down at the table, one on one, or you and hubby and her. Stand your ground, be stern. Don't get pulled in to any arguing, this is your house, your rules. She wants to stay, she can abide by them. You will be surprised at her reaction when you have sat her down. Yes, do put it in writing. If I may, I will send you my contract. I have to email it direct to you with your permission as we cant send attachements here in the group. Change the contract to fit your situation. Make it clear to you expect that she uphold her stay there, doing chores, etc. They dote on structure so listing things for them on a daily basis is good. Remind her of what she said when she was out on her own. She doesn't like it away from home, so remind her she has to earn her keep. If would like to also, you may call me, I have an 800# here at work if you would like to chat. Let me know about the contract. DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2006 Report Share Posted March 24, 2006 Hi Gabfwb, I used three IUDs, all for several years, two taken out for planned pregnancies. The third one after menopause. My first one was before I had any children (or pregnancies). I never had any problems, no cramping, no heavy bleeding (after the first month or two), no pain, no infections, etc. I feel that since I never had menstrual cramps to begin with I never had any problems. Other woman I know that had cramps before the IUD had a difficult time with them. I would recommend an IUD for any woman who doesn't have cramping. Both the birth control shot and the one under the skin STOPS the monthly menstrual flow and both have many problems. > > Do any of your daughters use the IUD method of birth control? If so, are there any daughters who are using this method and have not ever had a child? Some of the info indicate that women who have never had a child should not consider the IUD as the method of choice. We have just gone through our first, and I hope our last abortion. We have tried other methods, but this is a girl who cannot remember to brush her own teeth. She has already tried the Depo shot for two years, gained 25 lbs., refused to take it again. She was pregnant immediately after resuming her first period. Also, info is saying they may be taking the Depo off the market because it is harming the heart and bones. Any information or feedback on this birth control method would be appreciated. Our daughter is 20, very immature, argumentative, lacking in social skills and self-control. We need a breather from this pregnancy problem because we have so many other problems with her on a daily/hourly basis. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2006 Report Share Posted March 24, 2006 Debbie, Our daughter was asked to leave the home last Dec. and she was gone for 23 days. At that point she said she did not want to live like a homeless person, wanted to come home and get a job. Update is she did get a very good job with lots of potential but would not give up dirt-bag boyfriend and other dirt-bag friends. As a result boyfriend beat her up, he's in jail, she got pregnant, had abortion. Now I'm ready to set down these rules: Keep the job and work more hours, get some DBT therapy which I just found out about in our area (I will gladly pay for it) and be on some fool proof birth control. What do you think? Should I put this in writing? If she can't comply to these three things, I want her out of the house and I want no contact. Letting go is such a process and we all reach our limits at different times. I'm ready to take a hard stance on her and I know that I will follow through this time. Any other suggestions? Re: Birth control question In a message dated 3/23/2006 11:04:04 PM Eastern Standard Time, gabfwb@... writes: Our daughter is 20, very immature, argumentative, lacking in social skills and self-control. We need a breather from this pregnancy problem because we have so many other problems with her on a daily/hourly basis. Hi Gab? and Welcome. You have come to the right place. My daughter, now 19 has had two abortions one at 15 one at 17. I myself don't like the IUD's and my daughter doesn't have one, but she is on birth control pills. Ortho something. She has had no problems with them and is doing alright with them. Although my daughter is much further along than yours, reading my past posts to others here will help you. Your daughter is still living at home with you? Does she have a job? Hugs, DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2006 Report Share Posted March 24, 2006 Debbie, I would like your contract but I don't know how to get it-what the internet procedure is. I would also like your 800#. Thanks, gab Re: Birth control question In a message dated 3/24/2006 11:05:28 AM Eastern Standard Time, gabfwb@... writes: Our daughter was asked to leave the home last Dec. and she was gone for 23 days. At that point she said she did not want to live like a homeless person, wanted to come home and get a job Okay, you sit her down at the table, one on one, or you and hubby and her. Stand your ground, be stern. Don't get pulled in to any arguing, this is your house, your rules. She wants to stay, she can abide by them. You will be surprised at her reaction when you have sat her down. Yes, do put it in writing. If I may, I will send you my contract. I have to email it direct to you with your permission as we cant send attachements here in the group. Change the contract to fit your situation. Make it clear to you expect that she uphold her stay there, doing chores, etc. They dote on structure so listing things for them on a daily basis is good. Remind her of what she said when she was out on her own. She doesn't like it away from home, so remind her she has to earn her keep. If would like to also, you may call me, I have an 800# here at work if you would like to chat. Let me know about the contract. DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2006 Report Share Posted March 24, 2006 Hi, I have a 19 year old that had many issues as well. I wrote a contract and it was quite successful. She has said herself that she needs to see these expectations in black and white which I find is interesting. I suggest a contract. Ours is on our refrigerator as a constant reminder. My daughter struggled from the time she was 15 having similar experiences as your daughter. After I made major changes with my boundaries and expectations she has gotten it together and is now going to college. This is a huge change and I'm quite proud of her. gabfwb gabfwb@...> wrote: Debbie, Our daughter was asked to leave the home last Dec. and she was gone for 23 days. At that point she said she did not want to live like a homeless person, wanted to come home and get a job. Update is she did get a very good job with lots of potential but would not give up dirt-bag boyfriend and other dirt-bag friends. As a result boyfriend beat her up, he's in jail, she got pregnant, had abortion. Now I'm ready to set down these rules: Keep the job and work more hours, get some DBT therapy which I just found out about in our area (I will gladly pay for it) and be on some fool proof birth control. What do you think? Should I put this in writing? If she can't comply to these three things, I want her out of the house and I want no contact. Letting go is such a process and we all reach our limits at different times. I'm ready to take a hard stance on her and I know that I will follow through this time. Any other suggestions? Re: Birth control question In a message dated 3/23/2006 11:04:04 PM Eastern Standard Time, gabfwb@... writes: Our daughter is 20, very immature, argumentative, lacking in social skills and self-control. We need a breather from this pregnancy problem because we have so many other problems with her on a daily/hourly basis. Hi Gab? and Welcome. You have come to the right place. My daughter, now 19 has had two abortions one at 15 one at 17. I myself don't like the IUD's and my daughter doesn't have one, but she is on birth control pills. Ortho something. She has had no problems with them and is doing alright with them. Although my daughter is much further along than yours, reading my past posts to others here will help you. Your daughter is still living at home with you? Does she have a job? Hugs, DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 25, 2006 Report Share Posted March 25, 2006 >Now I'm ready to set down these rules: > Keep the job and work more hours, get some DBT > therapy which I just found out about in our area (I > will gladly pay for it) and be on some fool proof > birth control. What do you think? Should I put this > in writing? If she can't comply to these three > things, I want her out of the house and I want no > contact. Letting go is such a process and we all > reach our limits at different times. I'm ready to > take a hard stance on her and I know that I will > follow through this time. Any other suggestions? You go girl!!! By all means put it ALL in writing. 1. Keep the job 2. Stay on birth control 3. Go to DPT or leave home and lose contact. It looks very simple and clear to me. It will be the hardest thing you've ever done and I do NOT envy you for a second. Please stay in touch and let us know how things are doing. Make sure your daughter knows that you love her, but you cannot take care of her UNLESS she sticks to the rules. You may want to add more eventually, but if she can stick to these three, you will all be in a much better place and can think about that when it happens. A big hug and many prayers, Deborah __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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