Guest guest Posted September 20, 2005 Report Share Posted September 20, 2005 My 15 year old daughter is skipping once class everyday and really doesn't want to go to school. Any suggestions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 20, 2005 Report Share Posted September 20, 2005 In a message dated 9/20/2005 10:43:28 AM Eastern Standard Time, americanbelle@... writes: My 15 year old daughter is skipping once class everyday and really doesn't want to go to school. Any suggestions? Hello AmericanBelle and welcome! Got lots for you you. Mine started at 13. Any other issues with her? What else is she doing? You could email me privately if you like. I dealt with this and other issues for five years before realizing and doing what I did. My daughter is now 18 and we are a success story so there is hope for you and your daughter. Let me know what I can do for you. Hugs, DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 20, 2005 Report Share Posted September 20, 2005 In a message dated 9/20/2005 11:33:54 AM Eastern Standard Time, kerk0522@... writes: for each week that she has no skips, she gets something that she reallys wants -- not that it necessarily has to cost money. It all depends on her maturity level, etc. Just a suggestion. I also did this, for every week she went to school and didn't skip any classes, she received $25.00 in her acct. This didn't work out for us. DebbieL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 20, 2005 Report Share Posted September 20, 2005 Does she want to drive or get her permit? Or is that even something that you're considering? You can tie school attendance to her getting her permit/license. Do it as a positive rewards rather than negative consequences. You can also do something more short-term and immediate -- for each week that she has no skips, she gets something that she reallys wants -- not that it necessarily has to cost money. It all depends on her maturity level, etc. Just a suggestion. carolkopko americanbelle@...> wrote: My 15 year old daughter is skipping once class everyday and really doesn't want to go to school. Any suggestions? People joining this list must read the guidelines and agree to them before posting. Send questions or concerns to WelcomeToOz-owner . " Stop Walking on Eggshells " , a primer for non-BPs, and " Hope for Parents: Helping Your Borderline Son or Daughter Without Sacrificing Your Family Or Yourself " can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL (). For table of contents, go to http://www.BPDCentral.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 20, 2005 Report Share Posted September 20, 2005 Hi Carol, Skipping just one class? Does she give a good reason or a so-so reason? I would suspect she is being threaten, sexually harassed, or a conflict of some sort by another student. Gangs are now found in the best of neighborhoods and there could be pressure to take a side, etc. Could be the subject is boring her or too challenging. You can ask that she take the subject independently from the school... at home. Yes, the school may put up a fight but you can legally do it. Maybe find a college student willing to help and/or challenge her.... or even an old favorite teacher. Could be she has issues with this one teacher. Even though teachers say they don't have favorite it has been obvious with my daughter one of her teachers simply did not like her. My daughter has been home schooling through a Charter School, this will be her third year. She meets with her teacher once a month to turn in and receive school work. I am not 100% happy as I don't see it as challenging. But, I didn't see our local school doing that either. My daughter (17 yr ,senior) does very well with the home schooling. In the past she spent 4 -5 hours a day doing school work. So be it if it was at 10 PM or 10AM, she did do the work. BTW, the first year, when she was telling her teachers she would be going to home school after the quarter was over... two teachers told her she couldn't do it, that it was illegal, etc , adding to the stress she was already feeling at school. She came home with tears. But, I know my rights as a parent, I know my state law. I legally made my home a private school registered with the state... though I could only teach my own child. I have never regretted home schooling and when I look back I wish I had never sent her to a public school. I would ask at the top, skipping over asking the teacher, what is going on. If you suspect she is being threaten or hassled they have to investigate. > My 15 year old daughter is skipping once class everyday and really > doesn't want to go to school. Any suggestions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 21, 2005 Report Share Posted September 21, 2005 I agree with , it would be well worth exploring the situation and why she is avoiding the class. I experienced the same situation with my daughter who is soon going to be 19. She felt uncomfortable in one class, then found reasons for being uncomfortable in other classes so that eventually I couldn't get her to go to school at all. Of course it is the same that many members have written about, low self esteem- people looking at her funny etc. She is beautiful and bright but her confidence was/ is nil. On the other hand there was on several occassions sexual harrassment and she had difficult learning because of the behavior of others. She was easily distracted and annoyed. So the question has always remained, was it her lack of self confidence or frustration. Either way, she ended up not finishing her high school and got a GED. Best of luck, I truly know how concerned and frustrated you must feel. --- blu_cricket blu_cricket@...> wrote: > Hi Carol, > Skipping just one class? Does she give a good reason > or a > so-so reason? > > I would suspect she is being threaten, sexually > harassed, or a > conflict of some sort by another student. Gangs are > now found in > the best of neighborhoods and there could be > pressure to take a > side, etc. > > Could be the subject is boring her or too > challenging. You can > ask that she take the subject independently from the > school... at > home. Yes, the school may put up a fight but you can > legally do it. > Maybe find a college student willing to help and/or > challenge > her.... or even an old favorite teacher. > > Could be she has issues with this one teacher. Even > though > teachers say they don't have favorite it has been > obvious with my > daughter one of her teachers simply did not like > her. > > My daughter has been home schooling through a > Charter > School, this will be her third year. She meets with > her teacher > once a month to turn in and receive school work. I > am not 100% > happy as I don't see it as challenging. But, I > didn't see our local > school doing that either. My daughter (17 yr > ,senior) does very > well with the home schooling. In the past she spent > 4 -5 hours a > day doing school work. So be it if it was at 10 PM > or 10AM, she > did do the work. > > BTW, the first year, when she was telling her > teachers she would > be going to home school after the quarter was > over... two > teachers told her she couldn't do it, that it was > illegal, etc , adding > to the stress she was already feeling at school. She > came home > with tears. But, I know my rights as a parent, I > know my state law. > I legally made my home a private school registered > with the > state... though I could only teach my own child. I > have never > regretted home schooling and when I look back I wish > I had > never sent her to a public school. > > I would ask at the top, skipping over asking the > teacher, what is > going on. If you suspect she is being threaten or > hassled they > have to investigate. > > > > > > > My 15 year old daughter is skipping once class > everyday and > really > > doesn't want to go to school. Any suggestions? > > > > __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 22, 2005 Report Share Posted September 22, 2005 Re: skipping classes. My daughter did that, too. She didn't want to be in her classes because she didn't want anyone to know she was smart (common for girls). She didn't want to do the work -- I wasn't sure she had a conscience. She preferred to be with the kids ranked 3. (Our system groups the high schools 1 - 4 -- she was a 1). A couple teachers befriended her, I got her into a smaller class (15 students vs.l 28 - 30 for math, and we tried to find ways she could help others -- by tutoring, going to after school programs, etc. She also met kids who got their ged's, so decided that was the way to go!!!! At least, she came to her senses about that. During the period after she was hospitalized and in a day center for studies (where they really worked more with anger management, getting along, etc.), she was tutored and did quite well one-on-one. She was troubled by her own special curriculum by the English tutor and really wanted to have the same curriculum as the main stream class. She also changed schools and that helped. She did graduate high school (pregnant)......... Carol -------------- Original message -------------- > I agree with , it would be well worth > exploring the situation and why she is avoiding the > class. > > I experienced the same situation with my daughter who > is soon going to be 19. She felt uncomfortable in one > class, then found reasons for being uncomfortable in > other classes so that eventually I couldn't get her to > go to school at all. Of course it is the same that > many members have written about, low self esteem- > people looking at her funny etc. She is beautiful and > bright but her confidence was/ is nil. On the other > hand there was on several occassions sexual > harrassment and she had difficult learning because of > the behavior of others. She was easily distracted and > annoyed. So the question has always remained, was it > her lack of self confidence or frustration. Either > way, she ended up not finishing her high school and > got a GED. > > Best of luck, I truly know how concerned and > frustrated you must feel. > > --- blu_cricket wrote: > > > Hi Carol, > > Skipping just one class? Does she give a good reason > > or a > > so-so reason? > > > > I would suspect she is being threaten, sexually > > harassed, or a > > conflict of some sort by another student. Gangs are > > now found in > > the best of neighborhoods and there could be > > pressure to take a > > side, etc. > > > > Could be the subject is boring her or too > > challenging. You can > > ask that she take the subject independently from the > > school... at > > home. Yes, the school may put up a fight but you can > > legally do it. > > Maybe find a college student willing to help and/or > > challenge > > her.... or even an old favorite teacher. > > > > Could be she has issues with this one teacher. Even > > though > > teachers say they don't have favorite it has been > > obvious with my > > daughter one of her teachers simply did not like > > her. > > > > My daughter has been home schooling through a > > Charter > > School, this will be her third year. She meets with > > her teacher > > once a month to turn in and receive school work. I > > am not 100% > > happy as I don't see it as challenging. But, I > > didn't see our local > > school doing that either. My daughter (17 yr > > ,senior) does very > > well with the home schooling. In the past she spent > > 4 -5 hours a > > day doing school work. So be it if it was at 10 PM > > or 10AM, she > > did do the work. > > > > BTW, the first year, when she was telling her > > teachers she would > > be going to home school after the quarter was > > over... two > > teachers told her she couldn't do it, that it was > > illegal, etc , adding > > to the stress she was already feeling at school. She > > came home > > with tears. But, I know my rights as a parent, I > > know my state law. > > I legally made my home a private school registered > > with the > > state... though I could only teach my own child. I > > have never > > regretted home schooling and when I look back I wish > > I had > > never sent her to a public school. > > > > I would ask at the top, skipping over asking the > > teacher, what is > > going on. If you suspect she is being threaten or > > hassled they > > have to investigate. > > > > > > > > > > > > > My 15 year old daughter is skipping once class > > everyday and > > really > > > doesn't want to go to school. Any suggestions? > > > > > > > > > > > __________________________________________________ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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