Loss of Loved One/Snow & Everyone

[Guest guest]

Snow wrote:

: The loss of a loved one is very hard and there is always such a

: difference in your life. I lost my dad 4 years ago today,and there is a

: space in my life that is vacant and will never be filled. We were very

: close and so many many times I would just like to be able to call and

: say I love you,he was my hero. I know no words can help..but those of

: you who are going through this...it will get a little easier in

: time..but never ever be the same. By talking about them and the good

: times..their memory will stay alive always..

Snow,

You are so right in what you have said here. I am sorry that this is such a

late response to this email. I have had a rough week. It was 11 years ago

Sunday (April 30th) that my 28 (then) year old brother was killed in a one-car

accident. Two other people were with him in the vehicle, but my brother was the

one who died. The other 2 were friends of my brother (husband and wife). The

wife is bad off to this day - not all there mentally due to the accident and the

husband walked away from the accident with a broken left arm. The state patrol

pinned the driver of the car as my brother based on what the friend in the car

(husband) said and yet my brother was found with his head outside the passenger

door and his feet still in the car by the passenger door. The husband's wife

was found next to my brother and then the husband was out in the ditch. You

tell me who the driver was (sorry - my anger is showing).

As a family trying to deal with the loss, etc. the sloppiness of the trooper's

report and how he dealt with us, the other 2 in the car of the accident and

their family - left us with such severe grief all these years. All along we

felt that my brother was not at fault and yet could not afford to hire an

attorney to clear his name within the statue of limitations requirement. No one

(attorney) wanted to go up against the Washington State Patrol. This is such a

long tangled mess, it will take too much to try and talk about it here and this

is so off the topic of AI. The twist to all of this is we finally learned of

the admittance of this husband, that was in the car with my brother, that he in

fact was the driver!!! All these years, all this pain and suffering and loss of

my brother's name, etc. it would seem like to me there should be some sort of

way to reopen this case with this new information. We, surprisingly enough,

found this information out on Monday. I am relieved and feel so sick

inside....I am sorry to go on like this and I am sorry to bring this up, but I

am hurting and in need of some comfort I guess. I appreciate just being able to

vent it out here, if that is appropriate.

Anyway, this is where I have been all week....

Hugs,

Sandy

[Guest guest]

,

Thank you so much for your understanding and care. Your situation sounds so

very much the same. I hope that somehow, someday you will be able to find

out the truth in your own brother's death. I firmly believe that the ones

responsible for another person's death will somehow, someway pay for what

they did, even if we don't get the chance to see the 'method' of payment.

Knowing the truth does make a difference - it is just I would like him to

admit to our family, to our faces, that yes, he was the one responsible and

that he is truly sorry.

It also really angers me that the investigating trooper just wanted my

brother's case closed quickly because he was leaving to another post and did

not want anything hanging out to delay him. Just like what you said....the

cases are just stepping stones for them.

Well, thank you for allowing me to get this off my chest and for listening

here. I really really appreciate it....

You take care too...

Hugs,

Sandy

>Sandy,

>

>I for one can understand your feelings because of my own brothers death

(july

>will 4 years ago).He died under very mysteriously and at the hand of

another

>and the town police messed up the investigation and then unoffically closed

>the case saying that they weren't interested in the killer but only in the

>drug dealer where the drugs came from. Its such a nice way to tell a family

>that their loved one doesn't mean to much to the police department other

then

>a stepping stone to a so called bigger case.

>

>The one that suffers the most is my nephew who was there when his father

died

>and spent at 12 hours with his fathers body and had seen something but has

>blocked it all out. At least you know the truth and that should help a

little

>the friend should be held responsible to some degree for your brothers

death.

>

>Don't worry about venting here cause we all care and thats what friends are

>for and this group isn't just about RA or medical stuff. Its about people

>caring about other people so anytime you need to vent we are all here to

>listen.

>

>Take care,

>

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