Re: Can relate to depression....

April 10, 2002

Shandi writes,

I wonder what

happened to the girl who went to U2 concerts, hockey games, and

trips to Boston every month

You know I was just wondering about her today. I don't think that we have

heard from her for a while. Maybe she was one of those that go upset about

things that they could not post about and left to join one of those other

groups.

I, myself, could never figure out how she could do all that she did either.

If I tried it, I would be in bed for a month.

Take care,

Irene

Books may well be the only true magic

Alice Hoffman.

April 11, 2002

> Hi ,

>

> Hmm, do you happen to like U2 and hockey too? Listening to U2 is

one

> of the few things that keep me grounded or calm. I have hundreds of

> songs on my pc; music is very therapuetic. You sound like you know

> what I am going through a lot. My fears of being alone are that

> maybe I won't be able to get out of bed someday or be too tired to

> do something and I won't be able to help myself. Thanks for making

> me feel welcome here ...hope you'll share here too as well. A

> great group here.

>

> Shandi

>

Hi Shandi,

Yeah, I find music to be very therapeutic, especially U2. I'm trying

very hard to share more with this group. Telling things that are

going on in my liffe, or symptoms, is very easy. Telling how I feel

about it is very hard for me. But I'm trying. Part of the problem is

I don't want my friends to get sick of hearing me go on and on about

my fibro problems. And part of it is not wanting to admit to myself

that fibro is limiting what I can do. And part of it is I'm afraid if

I do let go and dump some this out, once I start, I won't be able to

stop, and how will I ever regain control?

Anyway, today the weather is sunny and beautiful here today. It

doesn't seem to be making any differnece in the way I feel though. I

wish this major flare up I've been having for the past few months

would die down. The sooner the better.

Take care,

April 11, 2002

Hi ,

Always glad to share with a fellow U2 fan. I think sharing in here is

great; before I found this place, I felt I was honestly going insane.

I wondered how something that won't kill you could feel this god

awful, I felt out of control of my body and thought it had to be

something horrible. This is such a good place for reassurance and

comfort.

When it comes to sharing with friends, do you have some friends that

truly understand? I have one, but even though she says to talk about

it whenever I want, I don't always believe she can tolerate my

complaints or venting. I hope you have a friend around you can trust

and who is really selfless enough to listen. I think we all deserve

that. You seem like a good listener, so I hope someone returns the

favor for you. As for losing control, and letting it all spill out,

this is the place to do it, and it may ease the burden a little.

*hugs to *

Shandi

> > Hi ,

> >

> > Hmm, do you happen to like U2 and hockey too? Listening to U2 is

> one

> > of the few things that keep me grounded or calm. I have hundreds

of

> > songs on my pc; music is very therapuetic. You sound like you

know

> > what I am going through a lot. My fears of being alone are that

> > maybe I won't be able to get out of bed someday or be too tired

to

> > do something and I won't be able to help myself. Thanks for

making

> > me feel welcome here ...hope you'll share here too as well.

A

> > great group here.

> >

> > Shandi

> >

> Hi Shandi,

>

> Yeah, I find music to be very therapeutic, especially U2. I'm

trying

> very hard to share more with this group. Telling things that are

> going on in my liffe, or symptoms, is very easy. Telling how I feel

> about it is very hard for me. But I'm trying. Part of the problem

is

> I don't want my friends to get sick of hearing me go on and on

about

> my fibro problems. And part of it is not wanting to admit to myself

> that fibro is limiting what I can do. And part of it is I'm afraid

if

> I do let go and dump some this out, once I start, I won't be able

to

> stop, and how will I ever regain control?

>

> Anyway, today the weather is sunny and beautiful here today. It

> doesn't seem to be making any differnece in the way I feel though.

I

> wish this major flare up I've been having for the past few months

> would die down. The sooner the better.

>

> Take care,

>

April 11, 2002

You touched on some things that are very familiar to me, like not

having patience with people who purposely put themselves through heck

(drinking, overexertion, etc) and then complain. You wonder why

anyone would choose that? Sounds like you have a wonderful husband;

also you seem to be right when you indicate only fibro sufferers (or

those with other chronic problems) understand on the level we do.

Sometimes it makes me feel isolated from " normal " people. another

hard part is realizing all the overwhelming things you need to do to

cope with an illness and not having the energy or focus to do them.

Like I know I should apply for disability, and I want to, but then I

think god, how can I do all that?

Self-esteem is a tough one. There's no doubt that physically

something is lost and if you've been active, this feels bad. Inside,

I know I'm the same, but people don't see me the same. Hope someone

is there bolstering your self-esteem! I find myself sitting here

sometimes thinking " what have I become " and feeling bad until I tell

myself I just can't help it; I cannot control that I have this

problem. Not easy to keep in mind all the time.

Shandi

> In a message dated 04/11/2002 10:32:01 AM Central Daylight Time,

> angel_of_harlemu2@y... writes:

>

> > When it comes to sharing with friends, do you have some friends

that

> > truly understand? I have one, but even though she says to talk

about

> > it whenever I want, I don't always believe she can tolerate my

> > complaints or venting. I hope you have a friend around you can

trust

> > and who is really selfless enough to listen. I think we all

deserve

> > that. You seem like a good listener, so I hope someone returns

the

> > favor for you. As for losing control, and letting it all spill

out,

> > this is the place to do it, and it may ease the burden a little.

> >

> > *hugs to *

> > Shandi

>

> exactly, as much as I love my husband, he doesn't understand. He

*chooses*

> to abuse his body by weight lifting, and then comes around me and

complains

> about how much he hurts. When really, to me, it's bragging. He just

doesn't

> understand, and though he listens, unless someone is or has been

where we

> are, they CANNOT understand the depression, anguish, mental

confussion, loss

> of self, loss of self esteem, and PAIN that we live in day in and

day out.

> You guys do. I may not say it all the time, but just listening to

you guys

> makes me feel better. I have " sisters and brothers " who know

what's going

> on.

> (and I love U2 also LOL, my fave albumn is October)

> ~*Meredith*~

>

April 11, 2002