I am sad

[Guest guest]

Hi from cold and windy Wisconsin,

For those of you who do not know, I have been on this board for a

little over a year. I started WW in July of 2003 at 153 pounds

(after losing 11 pounds on my own) and got to my goal of 136 pounds

I think in December of last year, then the 6 weeks of maintanence,

and as of sometime in Feb. I am at lifetime. Now almost a year

later I haven't fluctuated more than about 4 pounds either way. I

absolutely LOVE WW and what it has taught me. I was not a person

that was severely overweight, but one of those people who gained and

lost the same 10 pounds, then 20 pounds, then 30 pounds. This is a

beautiful and easy program that helps us change our attitude about

the definition of a " diet " and leads us on to healthier choices and

portion sizes rather than deprivation.

This board has been very important to me throughout my weight loss

and I still love it and read all the posts. I do get behind several

weeks at a time because " life gets in the way " , but I do " catch up "

eventually because most of the posts are very important to me.

BUT, last night when I finally got caught up after being very behind

for a while, I was very sad. As I was " catching up " I wanted to

respond to serveral posts, but I learned my lesson early in the game

that when you are that behind, don't post until you have caught up

because someone else has already responded in the way that you would

have.

I have seen people come and go on this board during my year and a

half, and it always saddens me. First of all, I KNOW I will

probably get blasted for saying what I feel, but I think we all have

a right (or SHOULD have a right) to our own opinion without being

lectured on what someone else believes. I AM a VERY SERIOUS WW.

However, I do hope that I can be understanding and empathetic of and

to anothers needs and confusion and ramblings without making them

feel worse and lecturing them and ultimately making them " leave " . I

have seem this happen about 4 times since I have been a member and

each time (other than the SPAM people) I have felt bad.

Without going into detail on each of the occasions, let me just say

this --this is a serious WW board, but what I see happening (and I

don't need a lecture on this because it is just my opinion) is that

if someone writes something worded " just the wrong way " , they get

scolded and lectured with a 3 page e-mail and soon that

person " leaves " . How sad is that? The 3 or 4 people I have

seen " leave " since I was here--none of them should have or needed to

but felt forced to. All were following the WW plan, but when they

posted something that offended someone else, well, they became

history.

I could not believe the " bickering " going back and forth over the

last 2 or 3 weeks (which mostly was not even about WW, but about

rich and poor and everyone trying to prove they were right and the

other person was wrong.) I read all of 's posts and my heart

went out to him. Some of you said it was " off topic " , but his deep

down reason for this board was that he weighs over 300 pounds, WAS

in WW at one time, still wants to be, but it struggling with his

life right now. I have 2 children and 2 step children who have all

very recently finished college and when any of them felt the way

did and tried to reach out to someone somewhere and got some

of the lashings he did, I would just cry. He IS trying to lose

weight, and yes, he is young and doesn't understand exactly how to

go about doing things for himself, and yes, I don't care if we were

all there and poor during college too, he NEEDED us, and while some

of you were very generous with him, some were downright nasty and it

made me very sad indeed.

Since I have been here, we lost 3 or 4 good WW people because they

wrote something in a way someone else didn't approve of. They were

all following the WW way of life, but " disagreed " with the wrong

people and they left.

There was a time when we were talking about what was on topic or

not, and I voiced my opinion that while I was thrilled for the

people that could run half marathons and full marathons and

triatholons, maybe those race reports would be better served on a

different board, and I got " put in my place " for that. People said

it was inspiring for them, and if I didn't like it, to just skip

past them. So I do. I am so thrilled that some of you have come so

far as to lose so much weight and to begin to " live " the WW way and

begin doing things never thought possible, but to me, on a WW board,

I don't need a blow by blow detail of a race. So, instead of

quitting the board, I just pass on those kind of posts.

So why can't some of you just " pass " on the kind of posts you don't

like? I am not angry. I am just sad at the intolerence I am seeing

on a board that is suppose to be supportive. I even feel I will

probably get lambasted or lectured for posting this, but it is my

opinion.

Like I said, I love WW, it has shown me a way of living a healthy

life and not feeling deprived of food. It has become a way of life

for me, and I know it can for you all too.

Sorry if I stepped on anyone's toes, but shy can't we all just get

along rather than trying to push people out who don't conform to our

opinions.

Just My Humble Opionion,

Terri in WI