Guest guest Posted February 23, 2004 Report Share Posted February 23, 2004 Hi All, Have a little laugh, makes you feel better. Ardie Subject: joke The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said "Who owns the big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, and said, "I do, why?" The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "I just thought you'd like to know that your horse is about dead out there!" The Lone Ranger and Tonto rushed outside, and sure enough, Silver was ready to die from heat exhaustion. The Lone Ranger got water for the horse, and soon Silver was starting to feel a little better. The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run around Silver and see if you can create enough of a breeze to make him start to feel better." Tonto said, "Sure, Kemosabe," and took off running circles around Silver. Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger returned to the bar to finish his drink. A few minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and asks, "Who owns that big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stands again, and claims, "I do, what's wrong with him this time?" The cowboy looks him in the eye and says . .. .( . . I JUST LOVE THIS . . . )"Nothin', but you left your Injun running." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 16, 2004 Report Share Posted March 16, 2004 THAT'S PRICELESS.......LMAO joke If I already sent this, ignore it. Little Leroy Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner. His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted."Mom, I want a bike for my birthday." Little Leroy was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school and at home. Leroy's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bikefor his birthday. Little Leroy, of course, thought he did.Leroy's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him to reflect on his behavior over the last year and write a letter to God and tell him why he deserved a bike for his birthday. Little Leroy stomped up thesteps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.LETTER 1:Dear God, I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one. Your friend, Leroy.Leroy knew this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this year, so he tore up the letter and started over.LETTER 2:Dear God, this is your friend Leroy. I have been a pretty good boy this year, and I would like a red bike for my birthday. Thank you, Leroy.Leroy knew this wasn't true either. He tore up the letter and started again.LETTER 3:Dear God, I have been an OK boy this year and I would really like a red bike for my birthday, Leroy.Leroy knew he could not send this letter to God either, so he wrote another letter.LETTER 4:Dear God, I know I haven't been a good boy this year. I am very sorry. I will be a good boy if you just send me a red bike for my birthday. Thank you, Leroy.Leroy knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him a bike. By now, Leroy was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go to church. Leroy's mother thought her plan had worked because Leroy looked very sad. "Just be home in time for dinner," his mother said. Leroy walked down the street to the churchand up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there. He picked up a statue of the Virgin . He slipped it under his shirt and ranout of the church, down the street, into his house, and up to his room. He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen. Leroy began to write his letter to God.LETTER 5:I'VE GOT YOUR MAMA. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE. Signed, YOU KNOW WHO "The LUPIES Store" Come check out our store...http://www.cafepress.com/thelupies"The LUPIES Web Page"http://www.itzarion.com/lupusgroup.html"The LUPIES online photo albums!" Check out what your fellow Lupies look like...http://www.picturetrail.com/gallery/view?username=lupies Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 1, 2004 Report Share Posted April 1, 2004 Bush and the PopeThe Pope is visiting DC and President Bush takes him out for an afternoon on the Potomac ... sailing on the presidential yacht, the Sequoia.They're admiring the sights when, all of a sudden, the Pope's hat (zucchetto) blows off his head and out into the water. Secret service guys start to launch a boat, but Bush waves them off, saying "Wait, wait. I'll take care of this. Don't worry."Bush then steps off the yacht onto the surface of the water and walks out to the Holy Father's little hat, bends over and picks it up, then walks back across the water to the yacht and climbs aboard. He hands the hat to the Pope amid stunned silence.The next morning the topic of conversation among Democrats on the Hill, CBS News, NBC News, ABC News, the New York Times, Hollywood celebrities, and in France and Germany is:"Bush Can't Swim." ____________________________________________________ IncrediMail - Email has finally evolved - Click Here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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