Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 Thanks Ellen, I know you don't speak for everyone but right then it seemed like you did. I feel better now than I did. This whole thing is hard for all of us. I read the pain in all the newly diagnosed and a different more seasoned pain in the recurring. But we are all humans facing the reality that we are mortal. I appreciate every kindness extended as if it were a personal look-in-the-eye exchange. It's the little things that aren't so little. Thank You, a Ellen wrote: a, I would be sorry if you decided to this group. Both sad for you and sorry for us, as a group, because every piece of information relating to " our " diagnosis is so important. What you have to offer is something many of us cannot get from friends, family, physicians, etc. Our shared experiences combine to give us the strength and support it takes to get through all of this. I, for one, enjoy the fact that not everyone else in this group is either my age, my same diagnosis or even better, that even some with similar diagnosis are on different treatments. To me, the diversity and first hand experience of a group of B/C survivors is not found many places - and it took me well into my treatment to find this group. Not everyone responds to all posts (except nne, bless her heart) but many of us have found friendships and developed trusting relationships here that we could not have found elsewhere. I'd hate for you to miss out on that. I don't have to agree with the advise that I ask for, but am so grateful to get it - down to earth answers to some very hard questions. I have never visualized you as anyone other than " a member of this sisterhood " and I would be disappointed if you should choose to not offer your opinions and continue to ask for help. Hugs, Ellen > > Hello all, > I've really enjoyed reading postings. It's encouraging to read the lines of love from strangers. I wish I had been here when I was newly diagnosed. > > The reason why I am here now is to get some answers or read some similar experiences that will help me deal with my life after chemo. I am okay most of the time but still break down for absolutely no reason, none that is apparent anyway. > > I can't help but feel under represented in this pool of people. That's why I brought up the men and breast cancer/why only pink issue. I feel like I am on the fringe too. It is frustrating to get very little feedback when I bring up what health is. If anything, cancer is a wake up call to realize we could be living a purer life, that's not to say we gave it to ourselves, but to maintain a level of responsibility from now on should be our number one job. I am disappointed that this is not reflected back from many people in the group. Does no one believe cancer recurs because the same chemical pool still exists within our bodies possibly because we didn't change anything? I want to help everybody but not many seem to care to listen. This is upsetting to me because I care so much and don't know any of you. > > Another point is that I don't read about any after-cancer maintenance for the psyche, and spiritual self. I was hoping to come across some tips because I have such emotional days, crying on the freeway and in school or the store. Maybe it's partially because my only caregiver and I broke up after 3 1/2 years recently. No one in my family lives nearby except my dad and he did his best but wasn't particularly nurturing. I dealt with the emotional stuff alone and took what I could out on my boyfriend. Poor guy, he is only 28 but did a stellar job and took it in stride. I wanted to join a group then and tried but it was similar in that everyone was a lot older and didn't have fertility issues and many were out a couple of years or more and I was just starting chemo. Now I'm in this group and it's the opposite! Most people are newly diagnosed. I like to help where I can but I would like some help too. Maybe at least some feedback from people. I have already gone > through all the surgeries, chemo, reconstruction etc. but I am far from done with this disease. I have so much fatigue, when I'm up I am going and then I am down and in bed at 2 in the afternoon. What do I do now besides juicing, coffee enemas, organic foods, herbs, exercise...?? > > I tried to find that other group for younger women but it is on the east coast and I would have to attend their meetings, not possible. I am still surprised it is so hard to find people like me in this situation. It's not just an age difference at all it's more a lifestyle and health difference. Us crazy health hippies in Cali may seem weird to you lot but it's perfectly normal to me! Anyway, I still hope we can learn from each other. If not I will go away. > > Lots of Love, > a > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 Thanks Ellen, I know you don't speak for everyone but right then it seemed like you did. I feel better now than I did. This whole thing is hard for all of us. I read the pain in all the newly diagnosed and a different more seasoned pain in the recurring. But we are all humans facing the reality that we are mortal. I appreciate every kindness extended as if it were a personal look-in-the-eye exchange. It's the little things that aren't so little. Thank You, a Ellen wrote: a, I would be sorry if you decided to this group. Both sad for you and sorry for us, as a group, because every piece of information relating to " our " diagnosis is so important. What you have to offer is something many of us cannot get from friends, family, physicians, etc. Our shared experiences combine to give us the strength and support it takes to get through all of this. I, for one, enjoy the fact that not everyone else in this group is either my age, my same diagnosis or even better, that even some with similar diagnosis are on different treatments. To me, the diversity and first hand experience of a group of B/C survivors is not found many places - and it took me well into my treatment to find this group. Not everyone responds to all posts (except nne, bless her heart) but many of us have found friendships and developed trusting relationships here that we could not have found elsewhere. I'd hate for you to miss out on that. I don't have to agree with the advise that I ask for, but am so grateful to get it - down to earth answers to some very hard questions. I have never visualized you as anyone other than " a member of this sisterhood " and I would be disappointed if you should choose to not offer your opinions and continue to ask for help. Hugs, Ellen > > Hello all, > I've really enjoyed reading postings. It's encouraging to read the lines of love from strangers. I wish I had been here when I was newly diagnosed. > > The reason why I am here now is to get some answers or read some similar experiences that will help me deal with my life after chemo. I am okay most of the time but still break down for absolutely no reason, none that is apparent anyway. > > I can't help but feel under represented in this pool of people. That's why I brought up the men and breast cancer/why only pink issue. I feel like I am on the fringe too. It is frustrating to get very little feedback when I bring up what health is. If anything, cancer is a wake up call to realize we could be living a purer life, that's not to say we gave it to ourselves, but to maintain a level of responsibility from now on should be our number one job. I am disappointed that this is not reflected back from many people in the group. Does no one believe cancer recurs because the same chemical pool still exists within our bodies possibly because we didn't change anything? I want to help everybody but not many seem to care to listen. This is upsetting to me because I care so much and don't know any of you. > > Another point is that I don't read about any after-cancer maintenance for the psyche, and spiritual self. I was hoping to come across some tips because I have such emotional days, crying on the freeway and in school or the store. Maybe it's partially because my only caregiver and I broke up after 3 1/2 years recently. No one in my family lives nearby except my dad and he did his best but wasn't particularly nurturing. I dealt with the emotional stuff alone and took what I could out on my boyfriend. Poor guy, he is only 28 but did a stellar job and took it in stride. I wanted to join a group then and tried but it was similar in that everyone was a lot older and didn't have fertility issues and many were out a couple of years or more and I was just starting chemo. Now I'm in this group and it's the opposite! Most people are newly diagnosed. I like to help where I can but I would like some help too. Maybe at least some feedback from people. I have already gone > through all the surgeries, chemo, reconstruction etc. but I am far from done with this disease. I have so much fatigue, when I'm up I am going and then I am down and in bed at 2 in the afternoon. What do I do now besides juicing, coffee enemas, organic foods, herbs, exercise...?? > > I tried to find that other group for younger women but it is on the east coast and I would have to attend their meetings, not possible. I am still surprised it is so hard to find people like me in this situation. It's not just an age difference at all it's more a lifestyle and health difference. Us crazy health hippies in Cali may seem weird to you lot but it's perfectly normal to me! Anyway, I still hope we can learn from each other. If not I will go away. > > Lots of Love, > a > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 Oh nne, you are so supportive of everyone, you are the mother of mothers. I am a mother too but I don't have children. Does that make sense?? You are right in that I do expect my body to do too much. My boyfriend used to tell me to rest when I was running around trying to clean. I would go so far over my limit I would become exhausted and hysterical sometimes and frustrated by the limitations. I am better at resting now but not perfect. I hate it. I feel like it is somehow my fault that I can't get everything done. It doesn't make sense that I have so much energy than all of a sudden I have zero and have to drop everything. Do you still feel this way? Please tell me you don't. I have calmed down a lot but life is going by us so fast and people make me feel stupid... my chemo-brain.... and I don't want to explain it to stangers, it sounds ridiculous to them. I was smart before and now I feel I am unreliable. I imagine this not going away. I take ginko biloba everyday, I think it's helping. I have to try really hard sometimes to remember things. I am back in school and was giving a speech yesterday and couldn't remember it although I swear I knew if before I got there. It's kind of funny in a way.... anyways, nne, thank you because I always read your words and they are always so welcoming and kind, you make people feel not alone and that's the most important thing I want to get out of this group. So thank you. Love K & nne Svihlik wrote: a, Please don't leave. We all do what we feel is the right thing for us. I have used visualization and relaxation tapes while going through treatment and still listen to one every night when we go to bed. I've been doing it for over 16 yrs. Have you ased the dr about antidepressants? Or if you don't want them is there something organic possibly that would help? Maybe you are expecting your body to do too much. My onc told me to listen to my body and when I was tired to rest. I will keep you in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html BreastCancerStories.com http://www.breastcancerstories.com/content/view/433/161/ Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com Check out my other ornaments at www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html Lots of info and gifts at: www.cancerclub.com from K Hello all, I've really enjoyed reading postings. It's encouraging to read the lines of love from strangers. I wish I had been here when I was newly diagnosed. The reason why I am here now is to get some answers or read some similar experiences that will help me deal with my life after chemo. I am okay most of the time but still break down for absolutely no reason, none that is apparent anyway. I can't help but feel under represented in this pool of people. That's why I brought up the men and breast cancer/why only pink issue. I feel like I am on the fringe too. It is frustrating to get very little feedback when I bring up what health is. If anything, cancer is a wake up call to realize we could be living a purer life, that's not to say we gave it to ourselves, but to maintain a level of responsibility from now on should be our number one job. I am disappointed that this is not reflected back from many people in the group. Does no one believe cancer recurs because the same chemical pool still exists within our bodies possibly because we didn't change anything? I want to help everybody but not many seem to care to listen. This is upsetting to me because I care so much and don't know any of you. Another point is that I don't read about any after-cancer maintenance for the psyche, and spiritual self. I was hoping to come across some tips because I have such emotional days, crying on the freeway and in school or the store. Maybe it's partially because my only caregiver and I broke up after 3 1/2 years recently. No one in my family lives nearby except my dad and he did his best but wasn't particularly nurturing. I dealt with the emotional stuff alone and took what I could out on my boyfriend. Poor guy, he is only 28 but did a stellar job and took it in stride. I wanted to join a group then and tried but it was similar in that everyone was a lot older and didn't have fertility issues and many were out a couple of years or more and I was just starting chemo. Now I'm in this group and it's the opposite! Most people are newly diagnosed. I like to help where I can but I would like some help too. Maybe at least some feedback from people. I have already gone through all the surgeries, chemo, reconstruction etc. but I am far from done with this disease. I have so much fatigue, when I'm up I am going and then I am down and in bed at 2 in the afternoon. What do I do now besides juicing, coffee enemas, organic foods, herbs, exercise...?? I tried to find that other group for younger women but it is on the east coast and I would have to attend their meetings, not possible. I am still surprised it is so hard to find people like me in this situation. It's not just an age difference at all it's more a lifestyle and health difference. Us crazy health hippies in Cali may seem weird to you lot but it's perfectly normal to me! Anyway, I still hope we can learn from each other. If not I will go away. Lots of Love, a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 Oh nne, you are so supportive of everyone, you are the mother of mothers. I am a mother too but I don't have children. Does that make sense?? You are right in that I do expect my body to do too much. My boyfriend used to tell me to rest when I was running around trying to clean. I would go so far over my limit I would become exhausted and hysterical sometimes and frustrated by the limitations. I am better at resting now but not perfect. I hate it. I feel like it is somehow my fault that I can't get everything done. It doesn't make sense that I have so much energy than all of a sudden I have zero and have to drop everything. Do you still feel this way? Please tell me you don't. I have calmed down a lot but life is going by us so fast and people make me feel stupid... my chemo-brain.... and I don't want to explain it to stangers, it sounds ridiculous to them. I was smart before and now I feel I am unreliable. I imagine this not going away. I take ginko biloba everyday, I think it's helping. I have to try really hard sometimes to remember things. I am back in school and was giving a speech yesterday and couldn't remember it although I swear I knew if before I got there. It's kind of funny in a way.... anyways, nne, thank you because I always read your words and they are always so welcoming and kind, you make people feel not alone and that's the most important thing I want to get out of this group. So thank you. Love K & nne Svihlik wrote: a, Please don't leave. We all do what we feel is the right thing for us. I have used visualization and relaxation tapes while going through treatment and still listen to one every night when we go to bed. I've been doing it for over 16 yrs. Have you ased the dr about antidepressants? Or if you don't want them is there something organic possibly that would help? Maybe you are expecting your body to do too much. My onc told me to listen to my body and when I was tired to rest. I will keep you in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html BreastCancerStories.com http://www.breastcancerstories.com/content/view/433/161/ Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com Check out my other ornaments at www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html Lots of info and gifts at: www.cancerclub.com from K Hello all, I've really enjoyed reading postings. It's encouraging to read the lines of love from strangers. I wish I had been here when I was newly diagnosed. The reason why I am here now is to get some answers or read some similar experiences that will help me deal with my life after chemo. I am okay most of the time but still break down for absolutely no reason, none that is apparent anyway. I can't help but feel under represented in this pool of people. That's why I brought up the men and breast cancer/why only pink issue. I feel like I am on the fringe too. It is frustrating to get very little feedback when I bring up what health is. If anything, cancer is a wake up call to realize we could be living a purer life, that's not to say we gave it to ourselves, but to maintain a level of responsibility from now on should be our number one job. I am disappointed that this is not reflected back from many people in the group. Does no one believe cancer recurs because the same chemical pool still exists within our bodies possibly because we didn't change anything? I want to help everybody but not many seem to care to listen. This is upsetting to me because I care so much and don't know any of you. Another point is that I don't read about any after-cancer maintenance for the psyche, and spiritual self. I was hoping to come across some tips because I have such emotional days, crying on the freeway and in school or the store. Maybe it's partially because my only caregiver and I broke up after 3 1/2 years recently. No one in my family lives nearby except my dad and he did his best but wasn't particularly nurturing. I dealt with the emotional stuff alone and took what I could out on my boyfriend. Poor guy, he is only 28 but did a stellar job and took it in stride. I wanted to join a group then and tried but it was similar in that everyone was a lot older and didn't have fertility issues and many were out a couple of years or more and I was just starting chemo. Now I'm in this group and it's the opposite! Most people are newly diagnosed. I like to help where I can but I would like some help too. Maybe at least some feedback from people. I have already gone through all the surgeries, chemo, reconstruction etc. but I am far from done with this disease. I have so much fatigue, when I'm up I am going and then I am down and in bed at 2 in the afternoon. What do I do now besides juicing, coffee enemas, organic foods, herbs, exercise...?? I tried to find that other group for younger women but it is on the east coast and I would have to attend their meetings, not possible. I am still surprised it is so hard to find people like me in this situation. It's not just an age difference at all it's more a lifestyle and health difference. Us crazy health hippies in Cali may seem weird to you lot but it's perfectly normal to me! Anyway, I still hope we can learn from each other. If not I will go away. Lots of Love, a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 Oh nne, you are so supportive of everyone, you are the mother of mothers. I am a mother too but I don't have children. Does that make sense?? You are right in that I do expect my body to do too much. My boyfriend used to tell me to rest when I was running around trying to clean. I would go so far over my limit I would become exhausted and hysterical sometimes and frustrated by the limitations. I am better at resting now but not perfect. I hate it. I feel like it is somehow my fault that I can't get everything done. It doesn't make sense that I have so much energy than all of a sudden I have zero and have to drop everything. Do you still feel this way? Please tell me you don't. I have calmed down a lot but life is going by us so fast and people make me feel stupid... my chemo-brain.... and I don't want to explain it to stangers, it sounds ridiculous to them. I was smart before and now I feel I am unreliable. I imagine this not going away. I take ginko biloba everyday, I think it's helping. I have to try really hard sometimes to remember things. I am back in school and was giving a speech yesterday and couldn't remember it although I swear I knew if before I got there. It's kind of funny in a way.... anyways, nne, thank you because I always read your words and they are always so welcoming and kind, you make people feel not alone and that's the most important thing I want to get out of this group. So thank you. Love K & nne Svihlik wrote: a, Please don't leave. We all do what we feel is the right thing for us. I have used visualization and relaxation tapes while going through treatment and still listen to one every night when we go to bed. I've been doing it for over 16 yrs. Have you ased the dr about antidepressants? Or if you don't want them is there something organic possibly that would help? Maybe you are expecting your body to do too much. My onc told me to listen to my body and when I was tired to rest. I will keep you in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html BreastCancerStories.com http://www.breastcancerstories.com/content/view/433/161/ Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com Check out my other ornaments at www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html Lots of info and gifts at: www.cancerclub.com from K Hello all, I've really enjoyed reading postings. It's encouraging to read the lines of love from strangers. I wish I had been here when I was newly diagnosed. The reason why I am here now is to get some answers or read some similar experiences that will help me deal with my life after chemo. I am okay most of the time but still break down for absolutely no reason, none that is apparent anyway. I can't help but feel under represented in this pool of people. That's why I brought up the men and breast cancer/why only pink issue. I feel like I am on the fringe too. It is frustrating to get very little feedback when I bring up what health is. If anything, cancer is a wake up call to realize we could be living a purer life, that's not to say we gave it to ourselves, but to maintain a level of responsibility from now on should be our number one job. I am disappointed that this is not reflected back from many people in the group. Does no one believe cancer recurs because the same chemical pool still exists within our bodies possibly because we didn't change anything? I want to help everybody but not many seem to care to listen. This is upsetting to me because I care so much and don't know any of you. Another point is that I don't read about any after-cancer maintenance for the psyche, and spiritual self. I was hoping to come across some tips because I have such emotional days, crying on the freeway and in school or the store. Maybe it's partially because my only caregiver and I broke up after 3 1/2 years recently. No one in my family lives nearby except my dad and he did his best but wasn't particularly nurturing. I dealt with the emotional stuff alone and took what I could out on my boyfriend. Poor guy, he is only 28 but did a stellar job and took it in stride. I wanted to join a group then and tried but it was similar in that everyone was a lot older and didn't have fertility issues and many were out a couple of years or more and I was just starting chemo. Now I'm in this group and it's the opposite! Most people are newly diagnosed. I like to help where I can but I would like some help too. Maybe at least some feedback from people. I have already gone through all the surgeries, chemo, reconstruction etc. but I am far from done with this disease. I have so much fatigue, when I'm up I am going and then I am down and in bed at 2 in the afternoon. What do I do now besides juicing, coffee enemas, organic foods, herbs, exercise...?? I tried to find that other group for younger women but it is on the east coast and I would have to attend their meetings, not possible. I am still surprised it is so hard to find people like me in this situation. It's not just an age difference at all it's more a lifestyle and health difference. Us crazy health hippies in Cali may seem weird to you lot but it's perfectly normal to me! Anyway, I still hope we can learn from each other. If not I will go away. Lots of Love, a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 Thanks for the compliment a. My surgery was over 16 yrs ago. Before that I would run around doing things so fast and do so much I am surprised my husband could see more than blur. When I was diagnosed I started reading everything I could on breast cancer/cancer. I read in many books that it was very important to learn to say NO if/when you wern't up to something. So I started, it wasn't easy believe me, and I still tend to not say no on occasion but I do limit myself and if I don't, my husband is after me. Most days, IF I get enough sleep I have a fair amount of energy. But if I am overdoing on something, like mowing the yard, I do get tired and then stop and rest. You have to find out what your limit is and go from there. Don't wait to hit the limit and then stop as it will take you longer to get your energy back. We don't go out much and just shop once a week.But if I am in the middle of a sentence and forget, I do tell the person that I have had chemo and it has affected my memory and please forgive me as I cannot think of the word I need or if I lose my train of thought I do the same thing. Most people are very understanding. My family all knows my problem and they just sit and wait for me to remember or try to fill in the word. I feel if this is the worst thing that has happened to me it beats the alternative! You ARE smart and reliable. You just have an obstacle to over come. A lot women have their memories return. Unfortunately mine hasn't and after 16 yrs I doubt it will. Its my short term memory that is affected. I can tell you what I did as a child but can't remember the things that just happened a few days ago and sometimes can't remember what I did the same day. You remain in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html BreastCancerStories.com http://www.breastcancerstories.com/content/view/433/161/ Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com Check out my other ornaments at www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html Lots of info and gifts at: www.cancerclub.com from K Hello all, I've really enjoyed reading postings. It's encouraging to read the lines of love from strangers. I wish I had been here when I was newly diagnosed. The reason why I am here now is to get some answers or read some similar experiences that will help me deal with my life after chemo. I am okay most of the time but still break down for absolutely no reason, none that is apparent anyway. I can't help but feel under represented in this pool of people. That's why I brought up the men and breast cancer/why only pink issue. I feel like I am on the fringe too. It is frustrating to get very little feedback when I bring up what health is. If anything, cancer is a wake up call to realize we could be living a purer life, that's not to say we gave it to ourselves, but to maintain a level of responsibility from now on should be our number one job. I am disappointed that this is not reflected back from many people in the group. Does no one believe cancer recurs because the same chemical pool still exists within our bodies possibly because we didn't change anything? I want to help everybody but not many seem to care to listen. This is upsetting to me because I care so much and don't know any of you. Another point is that I don't read about any after-cancer maintenance for the psyche, and spiritual self. I was hoping to come across some tips because I have such emotional days, crying on the freeway and in school or the store. Maybe it's partially because my only caregiver and I broke up after 3 1/2 years recently. No one in my family lives nearby except my dad and he did his best but wasn't particularly nurturing. I dealt with the emotional stuff alone and took what I could out on my boyfriend. Poor guy, he is only 28 but did a stellar job and took it in stride. I wanted to join a group then and tried but it was similar in that everyone was a lot older and didn't have fertility issues and many were out a couple of years or more and I was just starting chemo. Now I'm in this group and it's the opposite! Most people are newly diagnosed. I like to help where I can but I would like some help too. Maybe at least some feedback from people. I have already gone through all the surgeries, chemo, reconstruction etc. but I am far from done with this disease. I have so much fatigue, when I'm up I am going and then I am down and in bed at 2 in the afternoon. What do I do now besides juicing, coffee enemas, organic foods, herbs, exercise...?? I tried to find that other group for younger women but it is on the east coast and I would have to attend their meetings, not possible. I am still surprised it is so hard to find people like me in this situation. It's not just an age difference at all it's more a lifestyle and health difference. Us crazy health hippies in Cali may seem weird to you lot but it's perfectly normal to me! Anyway, I still hope we can learn from each other. If not I will go away. Lots of Love, a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 Thanks for the compliment a. My surgery was over 16 yrs ago. Before that I would run around doing things so fast and do so much I am surprised my husband could see more than blur. When I was diagnosed I started reading everything I could on breast cancer/cancer. I read in many books that it was very important to learn to say NO if/when you wern't up to something. So I started, it wasn't easy believe me, and I still tend to not say no on occasion but I do limit myself and if I don't, my husband is after me. Most days, IF I get enough sleep I have a fair amount of energy. But if I am overdoing on something, like mowing the yard, I do get tired and then stop and rest. You have to find out what your limit is and go from there. Don't wait to hit the limit and then stop as it will take you longer to get your energy back. We don't go out much and just shop once a week.But if I am in the middle of a sentence and forget, I do tell the person that I have had chemo and it has affected my memory and please forgive me as I cannot think of the word I need or if I lose my train of thought I do the same thing. Most people are very understanding. My family all knows my problem and they just sit and wait for me to remember or try to fill in the word. I feel if this is the worst thing that has happened to me it beats the alternative! You ARE smart and reliable. You just have an obstacle to over come. A lot women have their memories return. Unfortunately mine hasn't and after 16 yrs I doubt it will. Its my short term memory that is affected. I can tell you what I did as a child but can't remember the things that just happened a few days ago and sometimes can't remember what I did the same day. You remain in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html BreastCancerStories.com http://www.breastcancerstories.com/content/view/433/161/ Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com Check out my other ornaments at www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html Lots of info and gifts at: www.cancerclub.com from K Hello all, I've really enjoyed reading postings. It's encouraging to read the lines of love from strangers. I wish I had been here when I was newly diagnosed. The reason why I am here now is to get some answers or read some similar experiences that will help me deal with my life after chemo. I am okay most of the time but still break down for absolutely no reason, none that is apparent anyway. I can't help but feel under represented in this pool of people. That's why I brought up the men and breast cancer/why only pink issue. I feel like I am on the fringe too. It is frustrating to get very little feedback when I bring up what health is. If anything, cancer is a wake up call to realize we could be living a purer life, that's not to say we gave it to ourselves, but to maintain a level of responsibility from now on should be our number one job. I am disappointed that this is not reflected back from many people in the group. Does no one believe cancer recurs because the same chemical pool still exists within our bodies possibly because we didn't change anything? I want to help everybody but not many seem to care to listen. This is upsetting to me because I care so much and don't know any of you. Another point is that I don't read about any after-cancer maintenance for the psyche, and spiritual self. I was hoping to come across some tips because I have such emotional days, crying on the freeway and in school or the store. Maybe it's partially because my only caregiver and I broke up after 3 1/2 years recently. No one in my family lives nearby except my dad and he did his best but wasn't particularly nurturing. I dealt with the emotional stuff alone and took what I could out on my boyfriend. Poor guy, he is only 28 but did a stellar job and took it in stride. I wanted to join a group then and tried but it was similar in that everyone was a lot older and didn't have fertility issues and many were out a couple of years or more and I was just starting chemo. Now I'm in this group and it's the opposite! Most people are newly diagnosed. I like to help where I can but I would like some help too. Maybe at least some feedback from people. I have already gone through all the surgeries, chemo, reconstruction etc. but I am far from done with this disease. I have so much fatigue, when I'm up I am going and then I am down and in bed at 2 in the afternoon. What do I do now besides juicing, coffee enemas, organic foods, herbs, exercise...?? I tried to find that other group for younger women but it is on the east coast and I would have to attend their meetings, not possible. I am still surprised it is so hard to find people like me in this situation. It's not just an age difference at all it's more a lifestyle and health difference. Us crazy health hippies in Cali may seem weird to you lot but it's perfectly normal to me! Anyway, I still hope we can learn from each other. If not I will go away. Lots of Love, a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 Thanks for the compliment a. My surgery was over 16 yrs ago. Before that I would run around doing things so fast and do so much I am surprised my husband could see more than blur. When I was diagnosed I started reading everything I could on breast cancer/cancer. I read in many books that it was very important to learn to say NO if/when you wern't up to something. So I started, it wasn't easy believe me, and I still tend to not say no on occasion but I do limit myself and if I don't, my husband is after me. Most days, IF I get enough sleep I have a fair amount of energy. But if I am overdoing on something, like mowing the yard, I do get tired and then stop and rest. You have to find out what your limit is and go from there. Don't wait to hit the limit and then stop as it will take you longer to get your energy back. We don't go out much and just shop once a week.But if I am in the middle of a sentence and forget, I do tell the person that I have had chemo and it has affected my memory and please forgive me as I cannot think of the word I need or if I lose my train of thought I do the same thing. Most people are very understanding. My family all knows my problem and they just sit and wait for me to remember or try to fill in the word. I feel if this is the worst thing that has happened to me it beats the alternative! You ARE smart and reliable. You just have an obstacle to over come. A lot women have their memories return. Unfortunately mine hasn't and after 16 yrs I doubt it will. Its my short term memory that is affected. I can tell you what I did as a child but can't remember the things that just happened a few days ago and sometimes can't remember what I did the same day. You remain in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html BreastCancerStories.com http://www.breastcancerstories.com/content/view/433/161/ Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com Check out my other ornaments at www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html Lots of info and gifts at: www.cancerclub.com from K Hello all, I've really enjoyed reading postings. It's encouraging to read the lines of love from strangers. I wish I had been here when I was newly diagnosed. The reason why I am here now is to get some answers or read some similar experiences that will help me deal with my life after chemo. I am okay most of the time but still break down for absolutely no reason, none that is apparent anyway. I can't help but feel under represented in this pool of people. That's why I brought up the men and breast cancer/why only pink issue. I feel like I am on the fringe too. It is frustrating to get very little feedback when I bring up what health is. If anything, cancer is a wake up call to realize we could be living a purer life, that's not to say we gave it to ourselves, but to maintain a level of responsibility from now on should be our number one job. I am disappointed that this is not reflected back from many people in the group. Does no one believe cancer recurs because the same chemical pool still exists within our bodies possibly because we didn't change anything? I want to help everybody but not many seem to care to listen. This is upsetting to me because I care so much and don't know any of you. Another point is that I don't read about any after-cancer maintenance for the psyche, and spiritual self. I was hoping to come across some tips because I have such emotional days, crying on the freeway and in school or the store. Maybe it's partially because my only caregiver and I broke up after 3 1/2 years recently. No one in my family lives nearby except my dad and he did his best but wasn't particularly nurturing. I dealt with the emotional stuff alone and took what I could out on my boyfriend. Poor guy, he is only 28 but did a stellar job and took it in stride. I wanted to join a group then and tried but it was similar in that everyone was a lot older and didn't have fertility issues and many were out a couple of years or more and I was just starting chemo. Now I'm in this group and it's the opposite! Most people are newly diagnosed. I like to help where I can but I would like some help too. Maybe at least some feedback from people. I have already gone through all the surgeries, chemo, reconstruction etc. but I am far from done with this disease. I have so much fatigue, when I'm up I am going and then I am down and in bed at 2 in the afternoon. What do I do now besides juicing, coffee enemas, organic foods, herbs, exercise...?? I tried to find that other group for younger women but it is on the east coast and I would have to attend their meetings, not possible. I am still surprised it is so hard to find people like me in this situation. It's not just an age difference at all it's more a lifestyle and health difference. Us crazy health hippies in Cali may seem weird to you lot but it's perfectly normal to me! Anyway, I still hope we can learn from each other. If not I will go away. Lots of Love, a Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 k-- the first email list I joind was in 1999 - I had just gone back to work full-time after staying home on maternity leave with my son. he was 14 months old; we all slept together - it made nursing easier, and just made more sense to us as a family)...at 14 months he was still nursing, then started what is called " reverse cycle nursing " - nursing thoughout the night! I was EXHAUSTED! Didn't know anyone who nursed as long as I was, and really wsa at my wits end...so I found an email list for extended breastfeeders (who knew? it was an accident, really, that I signed up for it---all of a suddent though, i was getting lots of emails) Jude stopped nursing, one day, when he was three - i though am still a part of that list. THere are women from all walks of life on that list - some christian, some pagan, orthodox jewish, muslim...some just starting out; some who have weaned many eyars ago...some who vaccinate their kids, some who don'...what we share, though is pretty basic - that to be fed breastmilk from his mother's breast is a baby's birthright, and that the breastfeeding relationship should be allowed to end in a natural way (whenever possible)... The second list I joined was a dyslexia support list - again, we are all kinds of mothers - some who home school, some who dont...all with one underlying strong link - getting help for our children who are having a hard time learing to read (and writing, etc., etc.)... Finally, i found this list - I was part-way through my treatment - still have a bit to go... again, we are all different, at all different stages, all different challanges - for many us us, that have been mucked up with this lousy diagnosis - some of us married, some of us not, some of with children, some of us childless...many, i imagine are lurkers...but we're all here, I would imagine, because even though we might have family & loved ones in our lives, there is a certain--loneliness--perhaps? in walking though the world with breast cancer (as I would imagine there is for anyone with a scary disease - lie AIDS, for instance...) and to find a voice that can speak to our own and hear ours is a wonderful thing--whether or not we get a response... I also have to say that *this* list is by far the most active list I belong to (good grief!) and sometimes, i simply dont get through all the emails... anyway, for me, I enjoy the meandering nature of the posts...i do hope you stay... __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 k-- the first email list I joind was in 1999 - I had just gone back to work full-time after staying home on maternity leave with my son. he was 14 months old; we all slept together - it made nursing easier, and just made more sense to us as a family)...at 14 months he was still nursing, then started what is called " reverse cycle nursing " - nursing thoughout the night! I was EXHAUSTED! Didn't know anyone who nursed as long as I was, and really wsa at my wits end...so I found an email list for extended breastfeeders (who knew? it was an accident, really, that I signed up for it---all of a suddent though, i was getting lots of emails) Jude stopped nursing, one day, when he was three - i though am still a part of that list. THere are women from all walks of life on that list - some christian, some pagan, orthodox jewish, muslim...some just starting out; some who have weaned many eyars ago...some who vaccinate their kids, some who don'...what we share, though is pretty basic - that to be fed breastmilk from his mother's breast is a baby's birthright, and that the breastfeeding relationship should be allowed to end in a natural way (whenever possible)... The second list I joined was a dyslexia support list - again, we are all kinds of mothers - some who home school, some who dont...all with one underlying strong link - getting help for our children who are having a hard time learing to read (and writing, etc., etc.)... Finally, i found this list - I was part-way through my treatment - still have a bit to go... again, we are all different, at all different stages, all different challanges - for many us us, that have been mucked up with this lousy diagnosis - some of us married, some of us not, some of with children, some of us childless...many, i imagine are lurkers...but we're all here, I would imagine, because even though we might have family & loved ones in our lives, there is a certain--loneliness--perhaps? in walking though the world with breast cancer (as I would imagine there is for anyone with a scary disease - lie AIDS, for instance...) and to find a voice that can speak to our own and hear ours is a wonderful thing--whether or not we get a response... I also have to say that *this* list is by far the most active list I belong to (good grief!) and sometimes, i simply dont get through all the emails... anyway, for me, I enjoy the meandering nature of the posts...i do hope you stay... __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 2006 Report Share Posted October 21, 2006 k-- the first email list I joind was in 1999 - I had just gone back to work full-time after staying home on maternity leave with my son. he was 14 months old; we all slept together - it made nursing easier, and just made more sense to us as a family)...at 14 months he was still nursing, then started what is called " reverse cycle nursing " - nursing thoughout the night! I was EXHAUSTED! Didn't know anyone who nursed as long as I was, and really wsa at my wits end...so I found an email list for extended breastfeeders (who knew? it was an accident, really, that I signed up for it---all of a suddent though, i was getting lots of emails) Jude stopped nursing, one day, when he was three - i though am still a part of that list. THere are women from all walks of life on that list - some christian, some pagan, orthodox jewish, muslim...some just starting out; some who have weaned many eyars ago...some who vaccinate their kids, some who don'...what we share, though is pretty basic - that to be fed breastmilk from his mother's breast is a baby's birthright, and that the breastfeeding relationship should be allowed to end in a natural way (whenever possible)... The second list I joined was a dyslexia support list - again, we are all kinds of mothers - some who home school, some who dont...all with one underlying strong link - getting help for our children who are having a hard time learing to read (and writing, etc., etc.)... Finally, i found this list - I was part-way through my treatment - still have a bit to go... again, we are all different, at all different stages, all different challanges - for many us us, that have been mucked up with this lousy diagnosis - some of us married, some of us not, some of with children, some of us childless...many, i imagine are lurkers...but we're all here, I would imagine, because even though we might have family & loved ones in our lives, there is a certain--loneliness--perhaps? in walking though the world with breast cancer (as I would imagine there is for anyone with a scary disease - lie AIDS, for instance...) and to find a voice that can speak to our own and hear ours is a wonderful thing--whether or not we get a response... I also have to say that *this* list is by far the most active list I belong to (good grief!) and sometimes, i simply dont get through all the emails... anyway, for me, I enjoy the meandering nature of the posts...i do hope you stay... __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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