needing help re divorce interference

[Guest guest]

Hi Dawn

One thing that occurs to me, is to seek a protective restraining order. This

doesn't have to be just about obvious physical abuse and maintaining a

certain distance and so forth, as is typically done, but could also include

your issue.

Basically, you would argue (supported by documents and medical records) that

the mito disorder needs special attention ongoingly, and that your

ex-husband has already demonstrated disregard for this viewpoint, and that

therefore he is endangering your daughter. I would imagine that specific

instances, documented by third parties where possible, would be most helpful

for showing this last point.

I hear you, that you have had, and anticipate, difficulties explaining the

nature of a mito disorder in the legal context. But maybe you don't need to

go into it entirely. After all, there are allergies and so forth that are

simpler yet have the same problem, namely that your ex (and doctors, while

your daughter is in his custody) needs to be aware of the issues.

You can't MAKE him understand that one doesn't " grow out of " a mito

disorder, but you can make him responsible for delivering a certain written

statement (short and to the point, that 's doctor might compose) to

all potential care-givers, for instance.

My understanding is that restraining orders are rather easy to get if

there's at least SOME evidence. Judges do not like the idea of getting in

the newspapers, over the adverse consequences of an order they refused to

grant. Maybe it's best to start simple with that written-statement approach.

Anyway, I only mean to reassure you, and offer my $.02. Best of luck....

Steve D.

> Date: Sun, 26 Sep 2004 15:01:34 -0000

>

> Subject: I need help

>

> As many of you know, I have gone through a horrible divorce this

> past yr. 's doctor stepped up and protected her from the

> medical incompitence of her father and he can only visit her in my

> home. Drew is 13 and has chosen to not go with Jeff. In short, Jeff

> has not chosen to learn anything about mito in th past three yrs we

> have dealt with it because of . He lives in denial. Molly

> just began to go for overnights with him in the spring (because of

> her age) and that is when she began to present. She has had constant

> exhaustion, low grade temps, dehydration, and heat exhaustion upon

> returning from his home. When she was officially diagnosed this week

> he told me " I am optomistic she will live a normal life and grow

> out of it " . Do you see what I mean? Her doctor(pediatrician who

> knows little of mito) told me that he doesn't want to get dragged

> into court (I think Jeff has threatened him). I am frightened. Do

> you know how hard it is for us to expalin mito to ER docs? try

> explaining it to a judge or court worker or laywer. No one cares.

> One mistake and she can die. I am trying to get help from her mito

> doc but we have seen him once, so I can't imagine he will want o get

> involved. No one wants to protect her. I will go to jail- but how

> will that help them? any ideas would really help. I cannot believe

> it has really come to this. It really is that bad, and the court

> system is really that stupid.

>

> Any help would be appreciated.

> Dawn