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I have a 14 month old who recently got hearing aids.

Of course i have alot of questions one of which is,

will he be able to function in society without a lot

of hard times? I want him to get married and do the

normal things that a man is supposed to do. Right now

he looks so cute with them on but will he learn to

like them or hate them? I know how kids can be and i

would hate for him to have a hard time.

Thanks, Sara

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In a message dated 11/3/2005 2:10:40 A.M. Eastern Standard Time,

sjsatcher@... writes:

I want him to get married and do the

normal things that a man is supposed to do. Right now

he looks so cute with them on but will he learn to

like them or hate them?

He will be fine. He will go skiing, rollerblading, camping, to the movies,

bowling .. everything you can imagine a kid would do. I know because mine does.

He's now 15. And someday I expect he'll get married and bring home grandkids

for me to spoil. (grin) For now, he doesn't date, doesn't see the point.

His comment is that dating means you go out with a friend, and then when you

break up, you're not friends anymore. So why ruin a friendship? (did I make you

smile?)

Seriously, the worries are all completely normal. When we first found out

about Ian's hearing loss, I stood in my son's doorway at 3 am and cried just

watching him sleep. I was worried about everything you mentioned and more. But

it really will be okay. Go easy on yourself, you are allowed to feel however

you feel. I was hit by a huge range of emotions as I dealt with what I use to

call our " new reality. " Now it's just our normal life.

As to loving/hating his aids, that depends on the family attitude and the

kid's personality. My son LOVES his aids. Not because they're a great fashion

statement, but because they give him back some of his hearing. He was older

when he was aided and he never fought us about wearing them, or felt ashamed of

them.

No one has ever teased Ian about his aids. They teased him about being short

and once because a girl had a crush on him and followed him around like a

puppy, but never for his hearing loss or aids.

Our family attitude about his aids is that they are nothing to be ashamed of

or to hide. Everyone has something that they learn to deal with -- glasses,

asthma, and this is his thing to deal with. He is losing his hearing, it's

just a fact of life that we learn to deal with. We still occasionally feel

angry, sad or frustrated, and that's all okay.

Ian's aids are bright blue and his molds are a swirl of red-white-blue. They

can be just about any color or swirl of colors and the kids have fun picking

out their colors. When he's old enough, you can let your son do the

choosing. We let Ian chose and his aids have been blue ever since. The mold

colors

change, but he sticks with the blue casing on the aids.

We learned of our Ian's loss when he was about 7. He has a bilateral (both

ears) degenerating conductive loss. He'd been losing it slowly over a few

years and we found out about it when he started to struggle in school. He'd

passed all the hearing tests because the testers looked up when they played a

tone, so he'd raise his hand. And he spoke as clearly as I do, so we didn't

suspect a hearing loss, we suspected other things. (Boy did I feel stupid!) The

kid is a great lip reader, so he'd developed that amazing coping skill before we

learned of his loss -- that helped us NOT find his hearing loss. (sigh)

Our D/HOH (deaf/hard of hearing) kids are amazing ... I'm including every

kid on this list. They come up with their own coping skills, deal with so much

and do it so well. They simply amaze me.

There are a bunch of parents on this list with little ones like yours. They

can give you advice on keeping the aids on (toupe tapes seems to be a favorite

technique) and games to play to develop language skills. Even potty training

advice.

So, ask questions. The more the better. We've all had those questions.

You'll get lots of answers and opinions, which you are free to ignore or follow.

Just remember that you know your child best and are the one best qualified to

say when something is or isn't working. That goes for our advice, or that of

your doctors. (We saw several before settling in with the ones we have now.)

Welcome to the list,

Jill

..

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Hi Sara - both my boys who are " big guys " at 13 and 11 wear hearing aids

(although that's about to change for Tom - he's getting a cochlear

implant on Nov. 16). Tom is 13 and Sam is 11 - I can't say that either

has been teased about their aids and both have nice friends and are

fully involved in their schools. Tom even has a girl-buddy now (she's

hearing) so it hasn't so far been an issue. And he's looking forward to

going to school after his implant because he said all the girls will pay

attention to him! That boy....

Welcome!

Barbara

Sara Satcher wrote:

>I have a 14 month old who recently got hearing aids.

>Of course i have alot of questions one of which is,

>will he be able to function in society without a lot

>of hard times? I want him to get married and do the

>normal things that a man is supposed to do. Right now

>he looks so cute with them on but will he learn to

>like them or hate them? I know how kids can be and i

>would hate for him to have a hard time.

>

>Thanks, Sara

>

>

>

>

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