Fwd: TIPS FOR DEALING WITH PAIN

[Guest guest]

Tips for dealing with people in pain

Ideas for friends & family

1. People with chronic pain seem unreliable (we can't count on

ourselves). When feeling better we promise things (and mean it); when in

serious pain, we may not even show up. Pain people need the " rubber

time " (flexible) found in South Pacific countries and many aboriginal

cultures.

2. An action or situation may result in pain several hours later, or

even the next day. Delayed pain is confusing to people who have never

experienced it.

3. Pain can inhibit listening and other communication skills. It's like

having someone shouting at you, or trying to talk with a fire alarm

going off in the room. The effect of pain on the mind can seem like

attention deficit disorder. So you may have to repeat a request, or

write things down for a person with chronic pain. Don't take it

personally, or think that they are stupid.

4. The senses can overload while in pain. For example, noises that

wouldn't normally bother you, seem too much.

5. Patience may seem short. We can't wait in a long line; can't wait for

a long drawn out conversation.

6. Don't always ask " how are you " unless you are genuinely prepared to

listen - it just points attention inward.

7. Pain can sometimes trigger psychological disabilities (usually very

temporary). When in pain, a small task, like hanging out the laundry,

can seem like a huge wall to high to climb over. An hour later the same

job may be quite OK. It is sane to be depressed occasionally when you

hurt.

8. Pain can come on fairly quickly and unexpectedly. Pain sometimes

abates after a short rest. Chronic pain people appear to arrive and fade

unpredictably.

9. Knowing where a refuge is, such as a couch, a bed, or comfortable

chair, is as important as knowing where a bathroom is. A visit is much

more enjoyable if the chronic pain person knows there is a refuge if

needed. A person with chronic pain may not want to go anywhere that has

no refuge (e.g. no place to sit or lie down).

10. Small acts of kindness can seem like huge acts of mercy to a person

in pain. Your offer of a pillow or a cup of tea can be a really big

thing to a person who is feeling temporarily helpless in the face of

encroaching pain.

11. Not all pain is easy to locate or describe. Sometimes there is a

body-wide feeling of discomfort, with hard to describe pains in the

entire back, or in both legs, but not in one particular spot you can

point to. Our vocabulary for pain is very limited compared to the body's

ability to feel varieties of discomfort.

12. We may not have a good " reason " for the pain. Medical science is

still limited in its understanding of pain. Many people have pain that

is not yet classified by doctors as an officially recognised disease.

That does not reduce the pain, - it only reduces our ability to give it

a label, and to have you believe us.