Guest guest Posted January 18, 2004 Report Share Posted January 18, 2004 I had one good day and thought it was on the down side hah! It is two days latter and I am up to two large pads a day and a backache that is making walking a challenge. At five weeks post myo I hoped the bleeding would be over. I am tired of bleeding. I am getting depressed from the bleeding. I am tired of wait and see. I know that all the Lupron has left veins and arteries expossed inside my uterus and that this should fade but that doesn't make seeing blood every time I go to the bathroom comforting. This has been a long ride. I have been bleeding oddly since college and nearly continuosly for about three and a half years now except for the occasional day or two off. Yes all the drugs stopped me from standing in a puddle of my own blood but it hasn't given me enough days off to really recover mentally. I still see it and wonder if this is the best I will do. I wonder if the damn Lupron has made this forever. I know...wait and see. It is still five weeks before all the hormones will be out of my system. But I cannot remember not bleeding but puddles those are fresh in my mind. Whenever I watch CSI and they use Luminal I think of how my apartment would glow if I did that. Kitchen floor, couch, dining room floor, hallway and well the bathroom would not need a night light. Sick but sadly funny image. I just want a few a period again. I want to for the first time in 8 years not to wear a pad everyday for every moment. I want to come out of the shower and feel clean not make a mad dash for a pad. I want to be able to put the rugs back on the bathroom floor. I want to move the cleaners away from right next to the toilet. I want to not have two containers of urinary incontinance pads in my cart at WalMart everytime I go because they make better pads. I remember what I want but now I am seriously afraid it won't happen. Damn Lupron! Damn Tumor! and God help me because this is so tiring and sad these days. Good Luck to all e (11 doses of Lupron) (Megace for 10 months) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 18, 2004 Report Share Posted January 18, 2004 e. I know it is so hard for you. I suffer from those post traumas as well. When I bleed with a regular periiod now, I go back to the past. Just give ourself a big hug and know you are better than you were and most likely to be improving every day. The worst is over? hugs gg e wrote: >I had one good day and thought it was on the down side >hah! It is two days latter and I am up to two large >pads a day and a backache that is making walking a >challenge. At five weeks post myo I hoped the >bleeding would be over. I am tired of bleeding. I am >getting depressed from the bleeding. I am tired of >wait and see. >I know that all the Lupron has left veins and arteries >expossed inside my uterus and that this should fade >but that doesn't make seeing blood every time I go to >the bathroom comforting. This has been a long ride. >I have been bleeding oddly since college and nearly >continuosly for about three and a half years now >except for the occasional day or two off. Yes all the >drugs stopped me from standing in a puddle of my own >blood but it hasn't given me enough days off to really >recover mentally. I still see it and wonder if this >is the best I will do. I wonder if the damn Lupron >has made this forever. > >I know...wait and see. It is still five weeks before >all the hormones will be out of my system. But I >cannot remember not bleeding but puddles those are >fresh in my mind. Whenever I watch CSI and they use >Luminal I think of how my apartment would glow if I >did that. Kitchen floor, couch, dining room floor, >hallway and well the bathroom would not need a night >light. Sick but sadly funny image. I just want a few >a period again. I want to for the first time in 8 >years not to wear a pad everyday for every moment. I >want to come out of the shower and feel clean not make >a mad dash for a pad. I want to be able to put the >rugs back on the bathroom floor. I want to move the >cleaners away from right next to the toilet. I want >to not have two containers of urinary incontinance >pads in my cart at WalMart everytime I go because they >make better pads. I remember what I want but now I am >seriously afraid it won't happen. >Damn Lupron! >Damn Tumor! >and God help me because this is so tiring and sad >these days. > >Good Luck to all >e > >(11 doses of Lupron) >(Megace for 10 months) > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 18, 2004 Report Share Posted January 18, 2004 Hi e, Though I have only experienced a fraction of what you have gone through, I know what you mean. I bleed everyday too. I'm not gushing or bleeding extremely heavily after my ablation, but I bleed all the time. Like you, I long for the day when I can take a shower and feel clean all day. I don't remember what it feels like not to wear a pad. I've worn a pad, anywhere from incontincy to regular size since July. I'm praying that your latest myo does the trick for you. Hang in there and hope for better days. As for me, I have an appt with my gyn this Thursday. nne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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