How A Girl Would Help

[Guest guest]

Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to occupy your mind

and time and would not be so inclined to spend so my much time on researching

every thing so thouroughly. If that is not the case I can probably guess why

you are an ex. Women need to have equal time and I bet you were on the computer

researching every little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat

the small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study for days

for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about getting a perfect grade.

I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just as good as theirs and I never

had migraines in school.

(Illinois)

---------------------------------

Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Yahoo! Small

Business.

[Guest guest]

Warning! This is another long one folks. Keep in mind most email is

free and this only took me maybe 20 minutes to type up. I'm off to

get cleaned up for my shift with the home tour. Enjoy your day!

I was the plaintiff in my divorce. My ex fought our divorce for many

years while I would have gladly ended the marriage as soon as

possible. If my getting on the computer more often could have made

her leave me more quickly I would gladly have done that.

I have posted my daily schedule before but here it goes again:

Weekdays:

3:45am I wake up have breakfast and get ready.

4:45am I drive to work

5:10am I work out in the gym and take a shower

6:30am (or so) I start work (while at work I interact with dozens of

people locally, nationally and internationally. Not all business

related because, as you can imagine, some personal things/calls have

to occur during business hours. I work as a systems administrator in

a collaborative applications group at the enterprise level of a mid-

sized aerospace engineering company.

2:40pm I leave work to pick my daughter up from school

2:55pm I pick her up and we find something to do for 50 minutes while

waiting for my son to finish school. Usually we shop, get a coffee,

run and errand, work on homework, go for a walk, sit and listen to

the radio or just chat.

3:55pm pick up son from school

4:10pm arrive at my house. This is where it gets a little different

because my kids through all sorts of mess in here with sports

practices, friends, special events, etc. I usually end up trucking

them somewhere. Maybe one afternoon a week I don't. We'll work on

vacation until these trips which is usually only an hour to an hour

and a half. On the divorce papers I have the kids until 5:30pm every

weekday evening.

6:00pm Usually I've got the kids to their practices or games. I often

stay at them however Wednesdays and Thursdays are also days I go to

wine tastings with friends or BW3 for dinner. I have gone out on

Tuesdays too though. I also try to have dinner with my parents once a

week. It's really a mess in the evening.

8:00-9:00pm Arrive home, do laundry, prepare breakfast for tomorrow,

maybe study/read a bit (usually PMP certification material this time).

10:00pm go to bed.

While I am only supposed to have my children every other weekend (and

half their summer vacations) I have them every Friday evening (and

often half of her time on vacations) because my ex wife has made the

decision to not quit working as a bartender on the weekends even

though she has an adequate full time day job. This is one of the very

many reasons I filed for divorce.

Weekends are all over the map. I try to get extra sleep. Every

Saturday morning around 7am I (and the kids) walk, ride my bike or

drive my car to the local Farmer's Market to get fresh fruit/veggies

and to say hello to my cousin and her husband who run an organic

farm, sometimes my uncle and her children (cute little kids) are

there too. Now it's time to either take the kids to a game, friends,

event, and watch it etc. or to their mother's. Every other weekend my

time starts around noon. HURRAY!

On the weekends I have the kids we go on road trips, museums, the

library, movies, out to lunch or dinner probably two or three times

over the two days (I have them until 8pm Sunday) often with their

friends or my parents. During the rest of the time they have to clean

my house with me (their rooms, the yard, etc.) and my parents house

with me to pay off their cell phones ($10/month plus their usage in

the $90 family plan, figure $20 each a month). We'll also work on

homework frequently studying for tests the following week. Frequently

they spend their weekend evenings/overnight at a friends house or a

friend(s) will stay with them at my house. That adds a bit of fun

transportation or breakfast/lunch the next day.

On the weekends I don't have the kids after noon on Saturday I'm

working on projects at my house or the rentals my family owns. My

house has a leaky roof in the entry way and needs to have flooring

replaced in both bathrooms. I also have three computers I'm fixing.

One for my cousin, one for my mother, and one for a friend. I fixed

my neighbor's last week and setup another neighbor's range expander

for their wireless.

I try to fill my own weekends up with many things. This weekend I

walked (with then kids it turns out) to the Pulaski days' parade. I

then walked them to their mother's house. I then walked to my

parent's house and had a late lunch. I then walked to three houses on

the home tour this weekend. This morning I've volunteered 4 hours as

shift manager to earn the free ticket I have for the home tour. After

that I plan on spending the afternoon waiting in line and going

through three or hopefully four other houses. That'll be 6pm. I plan

on cooking a nice dinner for myself, reading a bit and

working/farting around online a bit in the evening until bed time.

Occasionally I'll have dinner with a friend or even go out on what

you might call a date with a female to a show, dinner, walk, etc.

It's difficult to find regular times with friends/dates because we

all have many things going on in our lives. I tend to gravitate

towards others who are employed, have families and many friends

themselves so they, too, are pressed for time.

I take at least three weeks of vacations a year. This year it works

out to around four. Usually they're all with my kids and sometimes

include my parents although I do take day trips to Lansing, Detroit

or Chicago to visit friends, relatives or colleagues a few times a

year but those usually are weekends because they all work during the

week.

I would caution against guessing why anyone is anything when you're

not qualified or have very little information. What you're proposing

is judging others with your own personal morays and values. This is a

very large country and world. Many people don't share my interests or

view them as important and they probably don't share yours.

I use many tools to research things and communicate with others. I

value my or my family's personal experience the most. Heck I even

value my ex's experiences. Is your only research tool the Internet?

What does " loosen up on life " mean? If you choose to answer this then

frame it around the idea that it includes lecturing/judging other's

personal choices in life. How much time is too much time to spend on

doing research for something that interests you?

How is studying for days for an exam bad or concerning oneself with

good grades for that matter? My first degree I only had a 2.86GPA so

if I did study for days I wasn't as successful as those you knew. As

it turns out I rarely studied too. I was working at UPS part time for

college money and usually had another part time job to help with

social money. My first degree took five years because I changed my

major from biology to political science. I simply couldn't hack the

time commitment for organic chem and other classes' lab and work.

My second degree, which I started after I filed for divorce, in

Network Engineering I did a bit better with a 3.75GPA. It was only

during my graduate work that I was able to achieve a 4.00. I've

always been curious about people who claim that working towards the

best grade you can achieve isn't a laudable goal. Can you tell me

more about your theories/friends here?

Maybe if you had studied you would have achieved an A, at the least

you would have been able to spell thoroughly correctly. I didn't

study and received Bs too however I also received some C+s and did

have to retake Calculus (although I partially blame the professor and

the other four courses I was taking for that because I got a B+ the

second time).

I've never experienced migraines in my entire life. I hear from my

mother they're quite awful. I'm interested in how you've determined

that increased studying for college exams and concerning oneself with

grades causes migraines. My daughter is starting high school next

year so I'm really worried about this now. Is this your own

conjecture or do you have a source?

It is possible to argue that extremely high GPAs matter. I would

submit that their most useful for things like grants, scholarships,

access to more challenging courses, and sometimes even remaining in

the program. Outside of school they MIGHT help you get that first job

if the " honors " or " sum laude " is all that's different between you

and another final candidate. I wouldn't sweat that though because

there are some serious odds against that. I'd think it more likely

that the school attended and specific courses taken would carry more

weight at that point. I've commented on hiring candidates often and

have but rarely notice/mention candidates' honors. I view them

similarly to sports, clubs, volunteering, etc. I suppose others might

consider that honors means the candidate has exceptional organization

skills but I've met some pretty disorganized high achievers myself.

I would never date someone as judgmental as you nor have I found it

worth my time to concern myself with your platitudes and lack of

substantial, actionable advice. Feel free to continue discussing this

with me as I don't intend on judging your future posts by this one, I

don't know you well enough to do that, in fact I (as you with me)

don't know you at all.

Mike in GR

>

> Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend so my

much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is not

the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to have

equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study for

days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about getting a

perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just as

good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

> (Illinois)

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Yahoo!

Small Business.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Warning! This is another long one folks. Keep in mind most email is

free and this only took me maybe 20 minutes to type up. I'm off to

get cleaned up for my shift with the home tour. Enjoy your day!

I was the plaintiff in my divorce. My ex fought our divorce for many

years while I would have gladly ended the marriage as soon as

possible. If my getting on the computer more often could have made

her leave me more quickly I would gladly have done that.

I have posted my daily schedule before but here it goes again:

Weekdays:

3:45am I wake up have breakfast and get ready.

4:45am I drive to work

5:10am I work out in the gym and take a shower

6:30am (or so) I start work (while at work I interact with dozens of

people locally, nationally and internationally. Not all business

related because, as you can imagine, some personal things/calls have

to occur during business hours. I work as a systems administrator in

a collaborative applications group at the enterprise level of a mid-

sized aerospace engineering company.

2:40pm I leave work to pick my daughter up from school

2:55pm I pick her up and we find something to do for 50 minutes while

waiting for my son to finish school. Usually we shop, get a coffee,

run and errand, work on homework, go for a walk, sit and listen to

the radio or just chat.

3:55pm pick up son from school

4:10pm arrive at my house. This is where it gets a little different

because my kids through all sorts of mess in here with sports

practices, friends, special events, etc. I usually end up trucking

them somewhere. Maybe one afternoon a week I don't. We'll work on

vacation until these trips which is usually only an hour to an hour

and a half. On the divorce papers I have the kids until 5:30pm every

weekday evening.

6:00pm Usually I've got the kids to their practices or games. I often

stay at them however Wednesdays and Thursdays are also days I go to

wine tastings with friends or BW3 for dinner. I have gone out on

Tuesdays too though. I also try to have dinner with my parents once a

week. It's really a mess in the evening.

8:00-9:00pm Arrive home, do laundry, prepare breakfast for tomorrow,

maybe study/read a bit (usually PMP certification material this time).

10:00pm go to bed.

While I am only supposed to have my children every other weekend (and

half their summer vacations) I have them every Friday evening (and

often half of her time on vacations) because my ex wife has made the

decision to not quit working as a bartender on the weekends even

though she has an adequate full time day job. This is one of the very

many reasons I filed for divorce.

Weekends are all over the map. I try to get extra sleep. Every

Saturday morning around 7am I (and the kids) walk, ride my bike or

drive my car to the local Farmer's Market to get fresh fruit/veggies

and to say hello to my cousin and her husband who run an organic

farm, sometimes my uncle and her children (cute little kids) are

there too. Now it's time to either take the kids to a game, friends,

event, and watch it etc. or to their mother's. Every other weekend my

time starts around noon. HURRAY!

On the weekends I have the kids we go on road trips, museums, the

library, movies, out to lunch or dinner probably two or three times

over the two days (I have them until 8pm Sunday) often with their

friends or my parents. During the rest of the time they have to clean

my house with me (their rooms, the yard, etc.) and my parents house

with me to pay off their cell phones ($10/month plus their usage in

the $90 family plan, figure $20 each a month). We'll also work on

homework frequently studying for tests the following week. Frequently

they spend their weekend evenings/overnight at a friends house or a

friend(s) will stay with them at my house. That adds a bit of fun

transportation or breakfast/lunch the next day.

On the weekends I don't have the kids after noon on Saturday I'm

working on projects at my house or the rentals my family owns. My

house has a leaky roof in the entry way and needs to have flooring

replaced in both bathrooms. I also have three computers I'm fixing.

One for my cousin, one for my mother, and one for a friend. I fixed

my neighbor's last week and setup another neighbor's range expander

for their wireless.

I try to fill my own weekends up with many things. This weekend I

walked (with then kids it turns out) to the Pulaski days' parade. I

then walked them to their mother's house. I then walked to my

parent's house and had a late lunch. I then walked to three houses on

the home tour this weekend. This morning I've volunteered 4 hours as

shift manager to earn the free ticket I have for the home tour. After

that I plan on spending the afternoon waiting in line and going

through three or hopefully four other houses. That'll be 6pm. I plan

on cooking a nice dinner for myself, reading a bit and

working/farting around online a bit in the evening until bed time.

Occasionally I'll have dinner with a friend or even go out on what

you might call a date with a female to a show, dinner, walk, etc.

It's difficult to find regular times with friends/dates because we

all have many things going on in our lives. I tend to gravitate

towards others who are employed, have families and many friends

themselves so they, too, are pressed for time.

I take at least three weeks of vacations a year. This year it works

out to around four. Usually they're all with my kids and sometimes

include my parents although I do take day trips to Lansing, Detroit

or Chicago to visit friends, relatives or colleagues a few times a

year but those usually are weekends because they all work during the

week.

I would caution against guessing why anyone is anything when you're

not qualified or have very little information. What you're proposing

is judging others with your own personal morays and values. This is a

very large country and world. Many people don't share my interests or

view them as important and they probably don't share yours.

I use many tools to research things and communicate with others. I

value my or my family's personal experience the most. Heck I even

value my ex's experiences. Is your only research tool the Internet?

What does " loosen up on life " mean? If you choose to answer this then

frame it around the idea that it includes lecturing/judging other's

personal choices in life. How much time is too much time to spend on

doing research for something that interests you?

How is studying for days for an exam bad or concerning oneself with

good grades for that matter? My first degree I only had a 2.86GPA so

if I did study for days I wasn't as successful as those you knew. As

it turns out I rarely studied too. I was working at UPS part time for

college money and usually had another part time job to help with

social money. My first degree took five years because I changed my

major from biology to political science. I simply couldn't hack the

time commitment for organic chem and other classes' lab and work.

My second degree, which I started after I filed for divorce, in

Network Engineering I did a bit better with a 3.75GPA. It was only

during my graduate work that I was able to achieve a 4.00. I've

always been curious about people who claim that working towards the

best grade you can achieve isn't a laudable goal. Can you tell me

more about your theories/friends here?

Maybe if you had studied you would have achieved an A, at the least

you would have been able to spell thoroughly correctly. I didn't

study and received Bs too however I also received some C+s and did

have to retake Calculus (although I partially blame the professor and

the other four courses I was taking for that because I got a B+ the

second time).

I've never experienced migraines in my entire life. I hear from my

mother they're quite awful. I'm interested in how you've determined

that increased studying for college exams and concerning oneself with

grades causes migraines. My daughter is starting high school next

year so I'm really worried about this now. Is this your own

conjecture or do you have a source?

It is possible to argue that extremely high GPAs matter. I would

submit that their most useful for things like grants, scholarships,

access to more challenging courses, and sometimes even remaining in

the program. Outside of school they MIGHT help you get that first job

if the " honors " or " sum laude " is all that's different between you

and another final candidate. I wouldn't sweat that though because

there are some serious odds against that. I'd think it more likely

that the school attended and specific courses taken would carry more

weight at that point. I've commented on hiring candidates often and

have but rarely notice/mention candidates' honors. I view them

similarly to sports, clubs, volunteering, etc. I suppose others might

consider that honors means the candidate has exceptional organization

skills but I've met some pretty disorganized high achievers myself.

I would never date someone as judgmental as you nor have I found it

worth my time to concern myself with your platitudes and lack of

substantial, actionable advice. Feel free to continue discussing this

with me as I don't intend on judging your future posts by this one, I

don't know you well enough to do that, in fact I (as you with me)

don't know you at all.

Mike in GR

>

> Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend so my

much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is not

the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to have

equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study for

days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about getting a

perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just as

good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

> (Illinois)

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Yahoo!

Small Business.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Warning! This is another long one folks. Keep in mind most email is

free and this only took me maybe 20 minutes to type up. I'm off to

get cleaned up for my shift with the home tour. Enjoy your day!

I was the plaintiff in my divorce. My ex fought our divorce for many

years while I would have gladly ended the marriage as soon as

possible. If my getting on the computer more often could have made

her leave me more quickly I would gladly have done that.

I have posted my daily schedule before but here it goes again:

Weekdays:

3:45am I wake up have breakfast and get ready.

4:45am I drive to work

5:10am I work out in the gym and take a shower

6:30am (or so) I start work (while at work I interact with dozens of

people locally, nationally and internationally. Not all business

related because, as you can imagine, some personal things/calls have

to occur during business hours. I work as a systems administrator in

a collaborative applications group at the enterprise level of a mid-

sized aerospace engineering company.

2:40pm I leave work to pick my daughter up from school

2:55pm I pick her up and we find something to do for 50 minutes while

waiting for my son to finish school. Usually we shop, get a coffee,

run and errand, work on homework, go for a walk, sit and listen to

the radio or just chat.

3:55pm pick up son from school

4:10pm arrive at my house. This is where it gets a little different

because my kids through all sorts of mess in here with sports

practices, friends, special events, etc. I usually end up trucking

them somewhere. Maybe one afternoon a week I don't. We'll work on

vacation until these trips which is usually only an hour to an hour

and a half. On the divorce papers I have the kids until 5:30pm every

weekday evening.

6:00pm Usually I've got the kids to their practices or games. I often

stay at them however Wednesdays and Thursdays are also days I go to

wine tastings with friends or BW3 for dinner. I have gone out on

Tuesdays too though. I also try to have dinner with my parents once a

week. It's really a mess in the evening.

8:00-9:00pm Arrive home, do laundry, prepare breakfast for tomorrow,

maybe study/read a bit (usually PMP certification material this time).

10:00pm go to bed.

While I am only supposed to have my children every other weekend (and

half their summer vacations) I have them every Friday evening (and

often half of her time on vacations) because my ex wife has made the

decision to not quit working as a bartender on the weekends even

though she has an adequate full time day job. This is one of the very

many reasons I filed for divorce.

Weekends are all over the map. I try to get extra sleep. Every

Saturday morning around 7am I (and the kids) walk, ride my bike or

drive my car to the local Farmer's Market to get fresh fruit/veggies

and to say hello to my cousin and her husband who run an organic

farm, sometimes my uncle and her children (cute little kids) are

there too. Now it's time to either take the kids to a game, friends,

event, and watch it etc. or to their mother's. Every other weekend my

time starts around noon. HURRAY!

On the weekends I have the kids we go on road trips, museums, the

library, movies, out to lunch or dinner probably two or three times

over the two days (I have them until 8pm Sunday) often with their

friends or my parents. During the rest of the time they have to clean

my house with me (their rooms, the yard, etc.) and my parents house

with me to pay off their cell phones ($10/month plus their usage in

the $90 family plan, figure $20 each a month). We'll also work on

homework frequently studying for tests the following week. Frequently

they spend their weekend evenings/overnight at a friends house or a

friend(s) will stay with them at my house. That adds a bit of fun

transportation or breakfast/lunch the next day.

On the weekends I don't have the kids after noon on Saturday I'm

working on projects at my house or the rentals my family owns. My

house has a leaky roof in the entry way and needs to have flooring

replaced in both bathrooms. I also have three computers I'm fixing.

One for my cousin, one for my mother, and one for a friend. I fixed

my neighbor's last week and setup another neighbor's range expander

for their wireless.

I try to fill my own weekends up with many things. This weekend I

walked (with then kids it turns out) to the Pulaski days' parade. I

then walked them to their mother's house. I then walked to my

parent's house and had a late lunch. I then walked to three houses on

the home tour this weekend. This morning I've volunteered 4 hours as

shift manager to earn the free ticket I have for the home tour. After

that I plan on spending the afternoon waiting in line and going

through three or hopefully four other houses. That'll be 6pm. I plan

on cooking a nice dinner for myself, reading a bit and

working/farting around online a bit in the evening until bed time.

Occasionally I'll have dinner with a friend or even go out on what

you might call a date with a female to a show, dinner, walk, etc.

It's difficult to find regular times with friends/dates because we

all have many things going on in our lives. I tend to gravitate

towards others who are employed, have families and many friends

themselves so they, too, are pressed for time.

I take at least three weeks of vacations a year. This year it works

out to around four. Usually they're all with my kids and sometimes

include my parents although I do take day trips to Lansing, Detroit

or Chicago to visit friends, relatives or colleagues a few times a

year but those usually are weekends because they all work during the

week.

I would caution against guessing why anyone is anything when you're

not qualified or have very little information. What you're proposing

is judging others with your own personal morays and values. This is a

very large country and world. Many people don't share my interests or

view them as important and they probably don't share yours.

I use many tools to research things and communicate with others. I

value my or my family's personal experience the most. Heck I even

value my ex's experiences. Is your only research tool the Internet?

What does " loosen up on life " mean? If you choose to answer this then

frame it around the idea that it includes lecturing/judging other's

personal choices in life. How much time is too much time to spend on

doing research for something that interests you?

How is studying for days for an exam bad or concerning oneself with

good grades for that matter? My first degree I only had a 2.86GPA so

if I did study for days I wasn't as successful as those you knew. As

it turns out I rarely studied too. I was working at UPS part time for

college money and usually had another part time job to help with

social money. My first degree took five years because I changed my

major from biology to political science. I simply couldn't hack the

time commitment for organic chem and other classes' lab and work.

My second degree, which I started after I filed for divorce, in

Network Engineering I did a bit better with a 3.75GPA. It was only

during my graduate work that I was able to achieve a 4.00. I've

always been curious about people who claim that working towards the

best grade you can achieve isn't a laudable goal. Can you tell me

more about your theories/friends here?

Maybe if you had studied you would have achieved an A, at the least

you would have been able to spell thoroughly correctly. I didn't

study and received Bs too however I also received some C+s and did

have to retake Calculus (although I partially blame the professor and

the other four courses I was taking for that because I got a B+ the

second time).

I've never experienced migraines in my entire life. I hear from my

mother they're quite awful. I'm interested in how you've determined

that increased studying for college exams and concerning oneself with

grades causes migraines. My daughter is starting high school next

year so I'm really worried about this now. Is this your own

conjecture or do you have a source?

It is possible to argue that extremely high GPAs matter. I would

submit that their most useful for things like grants, scholarships,

access to more challenging courses, and sometimes even remaining in

the program. Outside of school they MIGHT help you get that first job

if the " honors " or " sum laude " is all that's different between you

and another final candidate. I wouldn't sweat that though because

there are some serious odds against that. I'd think it more likely

that the school attended and specific courses taken would carry more

weight at that point. I've commented on hiring candidates often and

have but rarely notice/mention candidates' honors. I view them

similarly to sports, clubs, volunteering, etc. I suppose others might

consider that honors means the candidate has exceptional organization

skills but I've met some pretty disorganized high achievers myself.

I would never date someone as judgmental as you nor have I found it

worth my time to concern myself with your platitudes and lack of

substantial, actionable advice. Feel free to continue discussing this

with me as I don't intend on judging your future posts by this one, I

don't know you well enough to do that, in fact I (as you with me)

don't know you at all.

Mike in GR

>

> Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend so my

much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is not

the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to have

equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study for

days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about getting a

perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just as

good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

> (Illinois)

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Yahoo!

Small Business.

>

>

[Guest guest]

WOW!!! fight nice people. lol mike is a good guy. obviously does a lot too. haha

can't we all just get along? lol

Mike wrote: Warning! This is another long one

folks. Keep in mind most email is

free and this only took me maybe 20 minutes to type up. I'm off to

get cleaned up for my shift with the home tour. Enjoy your day!

I was the plaintiff in my divorce. My ex fought our divorce for many

years while I would have gladly ended the marriage as soon as

possible. If my getting on the computer more often could have made

her leave me more quickly I would gladly have done that.

I have posted my daily schedule before but here it goes again:

Weekdays:

3:45am I wake up have breakfast and get ready.

4:45am I drive to work

5:10am I work out in the gym and take a shower

6:30am (or so) I start work (while at work I interact with dozens of

people locally, nationally and internationally. Not all business

related because, as you can imagine, some personal things/calls have

to occur during business hours. I work as a systems administrator in

a collaborative applications group at the enterprise level of a mid-

sized aerospace engineering company.

2:40pm I leave work to pick my daughter up from school

2:55pm I pick her up and we find something to do for 50 minutes while

waiting for my son to finish school. Usually we shop, get a coffee,

run and errand, work on homework, go for a walk, sit and listen to

the radio or just chat.

3:55pm pick up son from school

4:10pm arrive at my house. This is where it gets a little different

because my kids through all sorts of mess in here with sports

practices, friends, special events, etc. I usually end up trucking

them somewhere. Maybe one afternoon a week I don't. We'll work on

vacation until these trips which is usually only an hour to an hour

and a half. On the divorce papers I have the kids until 5:30pm every

weekday evening.

6:00pm Usually I've got the kids to their practices or games. I often

stay at them however Wednesdays and Thursdays are also days I go to

wine tastings with friends or BW3 for dinner. I have gone out on

Tuesdays too though. I also try to have dinner with my parents once a

week. It's really a mess in the evening.

8:00-9:00pm Arrive home, do laundry, prepare breakfast for tomorrow,

maybe study/read a bit (usually PMP certification material this time).

10:00pm go to bed.

While I am only supposed to have my children every other weekend (and

half their summer vacations) I have them every Friday evening (and

often half of her time on vacations) because my ex wife has made the

decision to not quit working as a bartender on the weekends even

though she has an adequate full time day job. This is one of the very

many reasons I filed for divorce.

Weekends are all over the map. I try to get extra sleep. Every

Saturday morning around 7am I (and the kids) walk, ride my bike or

drive my car to the local Farmer's Market to get fresh fruit/veggies

and to say hello to my cousin and her husband who run an organic

farm, sometimes my uncle and her children (cute little kids) are

there too. Now it's time to either take the kids to a game, friends,

event, and watch it etc. or to their mother's. Every other weekend my

time starts around noon. HURRAY!

On the weekends I have the kids we go on road trips, museums, the

library, movies, out to lunch or dinner probably two or three times

over the two days (I have them until 8pm Sunday) often with their

friends or my parents. During the rest of the time they have to clean

my house with me (their rooms, the yard, etc.) and my parents house

with me to pay off their cell phones ($10/month plus their usage in

the $90 family plan, figure $20 each a month). We'll also work on

homework frequently studying for tests the following week. Frequently

they spend their weekend evenings/overnight at a friends house or a

friend(s) will stay with them at my house. That adds a bit of fun

transportation or breakfast/lunch the next day.

On the weekends I don't have the kids after noon on Saturday I'm

working on projects at my house or the rentals my family owns. My

house has a leaky roof in the entry way and needs to have flooring

replaced in both bathrooms. I also have three computers I'm fixing.

One for my cousin, one for my mother, and one for a friend. I fixed

my neighbor's last week and setup another neighbor's range expander

for their wireless.

I try to fill my own weekends up with many things. This weekend I

walked (with then kids it turns out) to the Pulaski days' parade. I

then walked them to their mother's house. I then walked to my

parent's house and had a late lunch. I then walked to three houses on

the home tour this weekend. This morning I've volunteered 4 hours as

shift manager to earn the free ticket I have for the home tour. After

that I plan on spending the afternoon waiting in line and going

through three or hopefully four other houses. That'll be 6pm. I plan

on cooking a nice dinner for myself, reading a bit and

working/farting around online a bit in the evening until bed time.

Occasionally I'll have dinner with a friend or even go out on what

you might call a date with a female to a show, dinner, walk, etc.

It's difficult to find regular times with friends/dates because we

all have many things going on in our lives. I tend to gravitate

towards others who are employed, have families and many friends

themselves so they, too, are pressed for time.

I take at least three weeks of vacations a year. This year it works

out to around four. Usually they're all with my kids and sometimes

include my parents although I do take day trips to Lansing, Detroit

or Chicago to visit friends, relatives or colleagues a few times a

year but those usually are weekends because they all work during the

week.

I would caution against guessing why anyone is anything when you're

not qualified or have very little information. What you're proposing

is judging others with your own personal morays and values. This is a

very large country and world. Many people don't share my interests or

view them as important and they probably don't share yours.

I use many tools to research things and communicate with others. I

value my or my family's personal experience the most. Heck I even

value my ex's experiences. Is your only research tool the Internet?

What does " loosen up on life " mean? If you choose to answer this then

frame it around the idea that it includes lecturing/judging other's

personal choices in life. How much time is too much time to spend on

doing research for something that interests you?

How is studying for days for an exam bad or concerning oneself with

good grades for that matter? My first degree I only had a 2.86GPA so

if I did study for days I wasn't as successful as those you knew. As

it turns out I rarely studied too. I was working at UPS part time for

college money and usually had another part time job to help with

social money. My first degree took five years because I changed my

major from biology to political science. I simply couldn't hack the

time commitment for organic chem and other classes' lab and work.

My second degree, which I started after I filed for divorce, in

Network Engineering I did a bit better with a 3.75GPA. It was only

during my graduate work that I was able to achieve a 4.00. I've

always been curious about people who claim that working towards the

best grade you can achieve isn't a laudable goal. Can you tell me

more about your theories/friends here?

Maybe if you had studied you would have achieved an A, at the least

you would have been able to spell thoroughly correctly. I didn't

study and received Bs too however I also received some C+s and did

have to retake Calculus (although I partially blame the professor and

the other four courses I was taking for that because I got a B+ the

second time).

I've never experienced migraines in my entire life. I hear from my

mother they're quite awful. I'm interested in how you've determined

that increased studying for college exams and concerning oneself with

grades causes migraines. My daughter is starting high school next

year so I'm really worried about this now. Is this your own

conjecture or do you have a source?

It is possible to argue that extremely high GPAs matter. I would

submit that their most useful for things like grants, scholarships,

access to more challenging courses, and sometimes even remaining in

the program. Outside of school they MIGHT help you get that first job

if the " honors " or " sum laude " is all that's different between you

and another final candidate. I wouldn't sweat that though because

there are some serious odds against that. I'd think it more likely

that the school attended and specific courses taken would carry more

weight at that point. I've commented on hiring candidates often and

have but rarely notice/mention candidates' honors. I view them

similarly to sports, clubs, volunteering, etc. I suppose others might

consider that honors means the candidate has exceptional organization

skills but I've met some pretty disorganized high achievers myself.

I would never date someone as judgmental as you nor have I found it

worth my time to concern myself with your platitudes and lack of

substantial, actionable advice. Feel free to continue discussing this

with me as I don't intend on judging your future posts by this one, I

don't know you well enough to do that, in fact I (as you with me)

don't know you at all.

Mike in GR

>

> Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend so my

much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is not

the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to have

equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study for

days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about getting a

perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just as

good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

> (Illinois)

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help. Yahoo!

Small Business.

>

>

[Guest guest]

I loved your post!! I love the fact you put your children first. It

takes a real man to put his wants and needs aside for his children.

They have already had their home ripped (from what was in your post

is sounds like it was your ex's doing) apart and they do not need

another woman in their life at this time. They need you. You are just

brilliant for seeing this and acting on it. I'm so so so so so

impressed!!! Way to go Mike!!!!!!! Thank you for being a REAL Dad to

your sweet kids!!!!!!!

OXOXOX

> >

> > Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

> occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend so

my

> much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is

not

> the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to

have

> equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

> little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

> small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study

for

> days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about getting

a

> perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just

as

> good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

> > (Illinois)

> >

> >

> > ---------------------------------

> > Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help.

Yahoo!

> Small Business.

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

I loved your post!! I love the fact you put your children first. It

takes a real man to put his wants and needs aside for his children.

They have already had their home ripped (from what was in your post

is sounds like it was your ex's doing) apart and they do not need

another woman in their life at this time. They need you. You are just

brilliant for seeing this and acting on it. I'm so so so so so

impressed!!! Way to go Mike!!!!!!! Thank you for being a REAL Dad to

your sweet kids!!!!!!!

OXOXOX

> >

> > Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

> occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend so

my

> much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is

not

> the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to

have

> equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

> little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

> small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study

for

> days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about getting

a

> perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just

as

> good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

> > (Illinois)

> >

> >

> > ---------------------------------

> > Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help.

Yahoo!

> Small Business.

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Well said ...I am sure no harm was meant. We

need to support each other and be friends on our

journey to healthier thinner bodies.

Debi

--- ~~ wrote:

> I don't think she meant anything in a mean or bad

> way, I took it as joking,

> making lite of the subject.

>

> That's one thing about emailing, one cannot see the

> body language, hear the

> tone or inflection of one's voice or " feel " the

> atmosiphere of the room.

>

> So, I guess it's best to sit back, take a breather,

> leave it, go one to

> another email or whatever, then go back and re-read,

> see if you " took it "

> the " right way " , then email that person privatly.

> Not bossing, just

> suggesting and hoping to smooth a few ruffled

> feathers.

>

>

> who uses her draft folder quite often lol

>

>

>

>

> ---

> avast! Antivirus: Outbound message clean.

> Virus Database (VPS): 0640-6, 10/08/2006

> Tested on: 10/8/2006 2:10:26 PM

> avast! - copyright © 1988-2006 ALWIL Software.

> http://www.avast.com

>

>

>

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Actually I'm not against dating or even finding a good woman right

now. Well maybe not RIGHT now. Give me a weekend to clean up the

place a bit. Then I'm all set.

It's just not a priority in my life or something I feel I need. It

might be a want I suppose. Then I have to hear about or someone

else who has a jealous/untrusting significant other. I don't throw

that out as a stereotype because everyone is different but it is

somewhat depressing to hear that sort of thing.

I would think someone I date regularly would enjoy spending time with

me AND my kids as I would with her and her children. That opens up a

whole can of worms because a large quantity of kids and two adults

leads to interesting transportation issues, potentially higher costs

and lots of other dynamics. Still I like to try to manage challenging

situations so that's not a turn off. I'm not sure if I can do that

long term though.

When my kids are both 18+ I'll only be 44. Perfect time to experience

my mid-life crisis! I've already started saving up for a corvette and

a hair piece and/or hair coloring.

I'm pretty sure I've only got maybe two more years of my kids putting

up with their dad's trips, walks, etc. They've already got many

obligations; homework, sports, friends, etc. and soon might even

start jobs, driving and dating. I'm probably going to have to do all

I can to remain in the backseat of their lives instead of being

pushed off on the side of the road. I do like them growing up though,

it keeps things changing and interesting.

Mike in GR

> > >

> > > Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

> > occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend

so

> my

> > much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is

> not

> > the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to

> have

> > equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

> > little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

> > small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study

> for

> > days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about

getting

> a

> > perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just

> as

> > good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

> > > (Illinois)

> > >

> > >

> > > ---------------------------------

> > > Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help.

> Yahoo!

> > Small Business.

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

Actually I'm not against dating or even finding a good woman right

now. Well maybe not RIGHT now. Give me a weekend to clean up the

place a bit. Then I'm all set.

It's just not a priority in my life or something I feel I need. It

might be a want I suppose. Then I have to hear about or someone

else who has a jealous/untrusting significant other. I don't throw

that out as a stereotype because everyone is different but it is

somewhat depressing to hear that sort of thing.

I would think someone I date regularly would enjoy spending time with

me AND my kids as I would with her and her children. That opens up a

whole can of worms because a large quantity of kids and two adults

leads to interesting transportation issues, potentially higher costs

and lots of other dynamics. Still I like to try to manage challenging

situations so that's not a turn off. I'm not sure if I can do that

long term though.

When my kids are both 18+ I'll only be 44. Perfect time to experience

my mid-life crisis! I've already started saving up for a corvette and

a hair piece and/or hair coloring.

I'm pretty sure I've only got maybe two more years of my kids putting

up with their dad's trips, walks, etc. They've already got many

obligations; homework, sports, friends, etc. and soon might even

start jobs, driving and dating. I'm probably going to have to do all

I can to remain in the backseat of their lives instead of being

pushed off on the side of the road. I do like them growing up though,

it keeps things changing and interesting.

Mike in GR

> > >

> > > Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

> > occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend

so

> my

> > much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is

> not

> > the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to

> have

> > equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

> > little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

> > small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study

> for

> > days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about

getting

> a

> > perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is just

> as

> > good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

> > > (Illinois)

> > >

> > >

> > > ---------------------------------

> > > Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help.

> Yahoo!

> > Small Business.

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

That's a shame. My kids are lucky that in Michigan custodial parents

can't move more than 100 miles away from the non custodial parent

without suffering serious consequences support/visitation wise and

without court approval. My ex used to threaten to move exactly 99

miles away. I would quickly retort with, " Fine, go ahead! So long as

it's west! (99 miles west would put her in the middle of Lake

Michigan) "

I know it's difficult but you still need to foster that relationship

with her father as best you can. It's sometimes tough for me, and my

ex, to positively spin each others actions to the kids but they're

better off if we do that no matter how much we might hate the !@#%^ &

for screwing up. I know we've both got it much easier living in the

same zip code than many couples.

Mike in GR

> > I loved your post!! I love the fact you put your children first.

It

> > takes a real man to put his wants and needs aside for his

children.

> > They have already had their home ripped (from what was in your

post

> > is sounds like it was your ex's doing) apart and they do not need

> > another woman in their life at this time. They need you. You are

just

> > brilliant for seeing this and acting on it. I'm so so so so so

> > impressed!!! Way to go Mike!!!!!!! Thank you for being a REAL Dad

to

> > your sweet kids!!!!!!!

> >

> > OXOXOX

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

That's a shame. My kids are lucky that in Michigan custodial parents

can't move more than 100 miles away from the non custodial parent

without suffering serious consequences support/visitation wise and

without court approval. My ex used to threaten to move exactly 99

miles away. I would quickly retort with, " Fine, go ahead! So long as

it's west! (99 miles west would put her in the middle of Lake

Michigan) "

I know it's difficult but you still need to foster that relationship

with her father as best you can. It's sometimes tough for me, and my

ex, to positively spin each others actions to the kids but they're

better off if we do that no matter how much we might hate the !@#%^ &

for screwing up. I know we've both got it much easier living in the

same zip code than many couples.

Mike in GR

> > I loved your post!! I love the fact you put your children first.

It

> > takes a real man to put his wants and needs aside for his

children.

> > They have already had their home ripped (from what was in your

post

> > is sounds like it was your ex's doing) apart and they do not need

> > another woman in their life at this time. They need you. You are

just

> > brilliant for seeing this and acting on it. I'm so so so so so

> > impressed!!! Way to go Mike!!!!!!! Thank you for being a REAL Dad

to

> > your sweet kids!!!!!!!

> >

> > OXOXOX

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

LOLOLOLOL.......Mike,

That line about moving 99 miles west got me ROLLING.........I'm going to

have to tuck that one away for a rainy day, 99 miles west from my house

would be about 50 miles out in the Pacific Ocean! I'm going to use that some

day!

LOLOL.......Mike T

Re: How A Girl Would Help

> That's a shame. My kids are lucky that in Michigan custodial parents

> can't move more than 100 miles away from the non custodial parent

> without suffering serious consequences support/visitation wise and

> without court approval. My ex used to threaten to move exactly 99

> miles away. I would quickly retort with, " Fine, go ahead! So long as

> it's west! (99 miles west would put her in the middle of Lake

> Michigan) "

>

> I know it's difficult but you still need to foster that relationship

> with her father as best you can. It's sometimes tough for me, and my

> ex, to positively spin each others actions to the kids but they're

> better off if we do that no matter how much we might hate the !@#%^ &

> for screwing up. I know we've both got it much easier living in the

> same zip code than many couples.

>

> Mike in GR

>

>

>> > I loved your post!! I love the fact you put your children first.

> It

>> > takes a real man to put his wants and needs aside for his

> children.

>> > They have already had their home ripped (from what was in your

> post

>> > is sounds like it was your ex's doing) apart and they do not need

>> > another woman in their life at this time. They need you. You are

> just

>> > brilliant for seeing this and acting on it. I'm so so so so so

>> > impressed!!! Way to go Mike!!!!!!! Thank you for being a REAL Dad

> to

>> > your sweet kids!!!!!!!

>> >

>> > OXOXOX

>> >

>> >

>> >

>>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> We are a very active support group.

> If the email becomes overwhelming,

> please change your setting to NO EMAIL!

> Please contact Group Creator

> Robyn@...

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

LOLOLOLOL.......Mike,

That line about moving 99 miles west got me ROLLING.........I'm going to

have to tuck that one away for a rainy day, 99 miles west from my house

would be about 50 miles out in the Pacific Ocean! I'm going to use that some

day!

LOLOL.......Mike T

Re: How A Girl Would Help

> That's a shame. My kids are lucky that in Michigan custodial parents

> can't move more than 100 miles away from the non custodial parent

> without suffering serious consequences support/visitation wise and

> without court approval. My ex used to threaten to move exactly 99

> miles away. I would quickly retort with, " Fine, go ahead! So long as

> it's west! (99 miles west would put her in the middle of Lake

> Michigan) "

>

> I know it's difficult but you still need to foster that relationship

> with her father as best you can. It's sometimes tough for me, and my

> ex, to positively spin each others actions to the kids but they're

> better off if we do that no matter how much we might hate the !@#%^ &

> for screwing up. I know we've both got it much easier living in the

> same zip code than many couples.

>

> Mike in GR

>

>

>> > I loved your post!! I love the fact you put your children first.

> It

>> > takes a real man to put his wants and needs aside for his

> children.

>> > They have already had their home ripped (from what was in your

> post

>> > is sounds like it was your ex's doing) apart and they do not need

>> > another woman in their life at this time. They need you. You are

> just

>> > brilliant for seeing this and acting on it. I'm so so so so so

>> > impressed!!! Way to go Mike!!!!!!! Thank you for being a REAL Dad

> to

>> > your sweet kids!!!!!!!

>> >

>> > OXOXOX

>> >

>> >

>> >

>>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> We are a very active support group.

> If the email becomes overwhelming,

> please change your setting to NO EMAIL!

> Please contact Group Creator

> Robyn@...

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

" If anything my filing for divorce was technically what caused it. "

Yeah only if you want to point fingers and stuff.........LOL.......

Mike T

Re: How A Girl Would Help

> Uh no....I don't do anything I don't want to do. If I don't feel like

> going to my kid's practice or their game I don't go. That just isn't

> the case very often. I'm still very selfish. If we have discussed

> something and committed to it, like a sport, then I will transport

> them no questions asked because I'm part of that equation at this

> time in their lives.

>

> I don't really blame either my ex or I for our divorce. It takes two

> to get married and two to get divorced. If anything my filing for

> divorce was technically what caused it.

>

> My kids are pretty sweet/cool I'll admit. I will give the ex credit

> (along with taking some myself) in that ALL of my kids' friend's

> parents constantly comment on how well behaved, kind, polite, smart,

> athletic, etc. my kids are. I'm pretty proud because a lot of that is

> them more than my ex or me at this age.

>

> Mike in GR

>

>

>> > >

>> > > Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

>> > occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend

> so

>> my

>> > much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is

>> not

>> > the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to

>> have

>> > equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

>> > little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

>> > small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study

>> for

>> > days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about

> getting

>> a

>> > perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is

> just

>> as

>> > good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

>> > > (Illinois)

>> > >

>> > >

>> > > ---------------------------------

>> > > Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help.

>> Yahoo!

>> > Small Business.

>> > >

>> > >

[Guest guest]

" If anything my filing for divorce was technically what caused it. "

Yeah only if you want to point fingers and stuff.........LOL.......

Mike T

Re: How A Girl Would Help

> Uh no....I don't do anything I don't want to do. If I don't feel like

> going to my kid's practice or their game I don't go. That just isn't

> the case very often. I'm still very selfish. If we have discussed

> something and committed to it, like a sport, then I will transport

> them no questions asked because I'm part of that equation at this

> time in their lives.

>

> I don't really blame either my ex or I for our divorce. It takes two

> to get married and two to get divorced. If anything my filing for

> divorce was technically what caused it.

>

> My kids are pretty sweet/cool I'll admit. I will give the ex credit

> (along with taking some myself) in that ALL of my kids' friend's

> parents constantly comment on how well behaved, kind, polite, smart,

> athletic, etc. my kids are. I'm pretty proud because a lot of that is

> them more than my ex or me at this age.

>

> Mike in GR

>

>

>> > >

>> > > Mike, I think if you had a girl you would have other things to

>> > occupy your mind and time and would not be so inclined to spend

> so

>> my

>> > much time on researching every thing so thouroughly. If that is

>> not

>> > the case I can probably guess why you are an ex. Women need to

>> have

>> > equal time and I bet you were on the computer researching every

>> > little thing then also. Loosen up Life is to short to sweat the

>> > small stuff. I had friends like you in college that would study

>> for

>> > days for an exam or test and have migraines worrying about

> getting

>> a

>> > perfect grade. I never studied and would get a B. My BSN is

> just

>> as

>> > good as theirs and I never had migraines in school.

>> > > (Illinois)

>> > >

>> > >

>> > > ---------------------------------

>> > > Get your own web address for just $1.99/1st yr. We'll help.

>> Yahoo!

>> > Small Business.

>> > >

>> > >